I will not blame the female folk today until next
time. Guys are going to get the heat for this one.
Here are 8 times men get stupid during S3x and
produce an offspring.


1. “I Pull Out Before I Shoot Out’

Oshey, Lord Withdrawal! Didn’t they tell you that
your pre-cum has enough sperm from your last
self-service session to father a child? Oh okay, you pee in-
between sessions. Nice move. But you can’t
honestly tell me that there weren’t a few slip-ups in
all your pull out encounters. You and I know that
the sweetest part is when you offload all your
goods in the right warehouse. So stop applauding
yourself for staining the sheets. And just a little
reminder, someone in the bible days died because
of this type of thing.



2. ‘It’s The Woman’s Responsibility To Handle
Contraception’

This is how so many clueless men have been lied
to. She tells you she’s on the pill or that she’ll pop
some after and you believe and go in without
protection. This same babe will come back a month
later and tell you the pill(s) didn’t work. Dude, never
believe any of that nonsense a woman says before
S3x. Always have yourself locked and loaded.



3. ‘I Tear Open The Condom Package With My
Teeth’

It’s good to get the mouth, and sometimes even the
teeth involved during S3x but please, use your
fingers to tear open the condom package. Why? To
avoid poking a hole into the condom, stupid. The
only hole you should be poking should be… never
mind. The wise ones understand what I’m talking
about.



4. Putting On Or Taking Off The Condom During
S3x

Okay, seriously I don’t get this part. You start having
S3x then halfway, for whatever reason, you say
‘oops! sorry, I forgot to use a condom’ and then you
put one on. Have you heard of pre-cum? Obviously
not. Google it. Then for those of you who decide
‘this condom thing is killing my vibe’ and decide to
remove it halfway, please go for quality stuff next
time or learn how to wear on a condom correctly or
just get married and stay faithful mbok.



5. ‘We Had S3x During Her Period’
First of all…eww!




Second, don’t deceive yourself.
Women have and can get pregnant during their
periods. Some medical practitioners will not agree
to this but others will. It has been found that some
women ovulate when they are menstruating, so
next time while dipping into the Red Sea, be sure
to use a life jacket. If you go releasing your little
swimmers with no protection, one of them is
bound to swim upstream and catch something
you’re not prepared for.


6. I’ve Had The Condom For Three Years
My dear brother,

I know it’s a quality brand
product and probably cost you a few hundred
naira and you’re saving it for prime V, or just
maybe you haven’t been laid in a long time; but it’s
no reason for you to leave it in your wallet until it
either expires or becomes useless. Use it when it’s
still good or throw it away.


7. ‘I Like My Condom Tight’


And so you push your p*n*s all in to fill the
condom tip. Bros, unless your p*n*s is shaped
exactly like a condom, please desist from
tightening things in there. You have to leave that
space for the spill. If you don’t, the condom will
break. I’m tempted to say it’s not ‘rocket’ science
but erm…



8. ‘We Had S3x While Standing’



First of all, buhahahahaha! For real? So, let me
understand the logic. You did it while standing and
all of the semen spilled to the floor and none was
left in her. Hmmm… In physics, following the law
of gravity, it makes sense. But not in biology,
which may have a law somewhere that states ‘what
goes in, stays in’. You should know that the v*g’i’na
is one place that may not have a door but has a
way of keeping things in. Be Warned!
Basically, just don’t be stupid during S3x. Protect
yourself and your woman. Use a condom.

http://9javibes.com/lifestyle-relationships/8-silly-things-men-do-during-s3x-that-leads-to-pregnancy-adult-only/?utm_source=&utm_medium=facebook

**Praçtice SAFE SEX all d time**

loads of bullshit

I'm going out to look for myself,
if you see me before i return,
please tell myself to call me so i know where i am.
This 'third mainland bridge' write up got me lost

The condom got busted and i never knew

Its not up 2 a month i had sex with u

The condom got busted and i never knew

Its not up 2 a month we had sex with u

huh

Thanks man... No wonder niggas forming pro dy score goals nd I wey dy do jeje dey raise shoulder... Anyway I'll show dis to some stupid upcoming fuckers

Nice one op, as for me i dont lick tom tom with sachet i love anything natural

Have a life bro u dnt have to be silly everywhere

Blizzyblinkzy:
The condom got busted and i never knew

Its not up 2 a month i had sex with u

But I didn't release in u na
U saw d spe*m on the floor na

falconey:

do you have strawberry flavour?

I dnt like flavored ones bae

Nice. One!!
Guys take note

looool

falconey:


durex? Is their product reliable? Dependable?

Well...yeah...but still there's a lot of brands u can find over the counter u can choose from & wat type of condom do u like to use ?

falconey:


I don't engage in coitis a lot, most of mine is flesh on flesh like real niggaz.

I'll go for one that won't harm my PEN and turn me to a father at this time.

Well good luck, u may find wat u lookin for...

KashyBaby:

I dnt like flavored ones bae

Kashybabe

wristwatch:


Kashybabe

Yaaaaaas Mr. wristwatch ?

Falconey, baba this one nah sexuality things if e hits FP.

Vry funny and interesting write up

KashyBaby:


Yaaaaaas Mr. wristwatch ?

Can we have a word via PM? It's urgent mam!

Thks.

Another shit load, frm the stables of nairaland! #vegatalks

What are u guys talking abt?

good FrontPage material
guys una hear..
op.u forgot to add salt n water guys noting set person nor go see for naija.
zip up!

Falconey, so you dont use condoms..? And u typed this shiit abt it