oya na Sammy... no make me lose my tempa.....

Edwardhead:
I was reading this story last year before Nairaland crashed down, let me tell you where I dey, the scene wey d guy go wedding for church and ...
mention me when u reach dat side


fans of EBIAG

Oh! You mean that NL crash I didn't recover from till today?

Alright then, I'll mention u as u said.

Me no sabi how I carry enter Nairaland again sef, something wey I don tok bye bye for before before. I run enter that LAST MAN STANDING thread wey dey literature section. E shock me when I see say the thing don get one page pass where I dey before.

I jejely look wetin dey. Many of them still dey ontop my matter sef. One person tok say Magawealthy no get sense na...like hin name na so hin be Another person tok say Where is that Maga?

Then another person kon quote am say Maga is paying me tomorrow! Hurray!

The thing catch my interest so tey I run check who post am. I shock when I see say na one name, GokeYemco419. Quick quick I don run correlate am. Abi na that my Titi Facebook be this, Olagoke Adeyemo.

"Okay, me wan dey sure. I run quote am kon tok say, "Hurray! Hurray! Hurray! How much hin wan pay you?"

GokeYemco419: You want to share the money with me?"

Magawealthy14: Me wan help you flex the money na

GokeYemco419: Na you help me do the job?

I dey try make I just know whether na me be the maga wey this guy dey tok about but hin no wan come straight. I go continue dey ask am question whether e fit do mistake fall enter my hands.

Magawealthy14: Job na hin you wan kon job person here abi? How much your maga wan pay you tomorrow?

GokeYemco419: Tomorrow na #50,000 go rush enter my account o. *But na ear you take hear am o...one kobo no go reach you, guy*

Magawealthy14: O my God! That your maga na real maga o; you mean say hin go vomit that kine plenty money give you.

GokeYemco419: You no sabi how much I pretend na hin cause am. I use power of woman for ram--Titilayo Adelanwa, hian...LWKMD.

So na Facebook Titi I just finish chat with now for Nairaland. I smile. So true true na boy be this Titi. Na 'm' den even write for front of GokeYemco419 name, meaning say him br boy. Okay nah, no problem. Small small hin don dey fall be that nah. I go tell Emeka.

Emeka soon waka enter my shop dey sweat like goat wey dey inside son since morning. Den say goat dey sweat na hin hair no let us see am.

"Emeka, how far the parole nah?" I ask am sharpaly.

"Guy, I don get the bulk sms o. I add money ontop buy am sef."

I know say na lie Emeka dey lie. Me wey I don go do research about bulk sms. Den say that #1,500 go even fit buy 1000 units of bulk sms sef, na hin this guy wan kon dey use my brain for here.

"Shut up Emeka! Do mey you send that message give Titi Facebook tomorrow kon allow me flex the remaining Nine hundred and ninety something SMS wey go remain jare!"

Emeka open mouth dey look me. He wonder say how I take know say na like that he dey be.

"For your mind," hin tok kon use style change topic sharp sharp. "Em...Chiboy, na one problem go kon show face for all our plans o."

"Wetin again? No tok money again o, because I no go give you shishi."

"Shut up!" Emeka shun me. "The thing be say if Olagoke no see the Wema Bank alert for hin e-mail follow the one wey we wan send enter hin phone, our trap fit no catch am o. Hin go suspect say na trick we wan trick am. You know say na sharp guy hin be nah."

"So wetin you need now?"

"If to say I fit get hin e-mail address, e for make brain die. I for just open one email address call am WemabankNigeria@ gmail.com. I pray make hin no even reason go the gmail wey I wan use sef. If not hin no go believe the scam o."

I don dey confuse. E just be like say na grammar Emeka dey tok for my ears sef. Na yahoo me sabi, and na the one wey Segun don open for me since 2011 na hin I still dey use. Me just dey hear gmail for the first time sef.

"Wetin you need gan gan?" I ask sharply. Me no dey for slow motion again joor.

"I need Goke email address," hin tell me. Where I wan get that one? I no even get idea. And if we ask am for Facebook, the girl, abi na guy sef, fit begin kana small small.

My mind flash back GokeYemco419. I run yarn the tory give Emeka. When hin hear am, hin jump wan use mistake put hin neck for fan wey dey number five for my ceiling. E remain small, Emeka head for dey roll for ground like ball, American football.

"Wetin make you jump like that nah?" I shout. "I pity your life, Emeka." I run remember one guy wey jump like that for one advertisement wey dey inside my phone. Hin rob bank successfully, escape enter house. Na so hin unzip the bag see million for inside, jump enter fan mouth. The remaining story na hell hin go go tok am. Hin head scatter for ground like egg wey break!

Emeka tell me reason why hin jump like that. He tok say person fit get another person email address from nairaland. I shock, because me no know say Emeka know abkut Nairaland at all at all.

I just dey observe. Sharply, Emeka don log in to nairaland with hin own account kon go search for GokeYemco419. He click hin name and hin profile come out sharply. Emeka click 'Send E-mail Message to This Member'.

Emeka clap once and tok say Titi e-mail go soon show face.

"How you take know?" I ask am. "You be winch?"

"You mugun nah! You no sabi say you fit get person email from nairaland?"

Me dey wonder how Emeka take sabi dat kine thing, wen be say na JJC e be for nairaland. I ask am wen hin join nairaland.

"Since 2005," Emeka tok. I shock.

"Na lie," I no believe. "Why you no kon tok say u dey Nairaland that time wey I dey tok to you about the site?"

"Den don ban me for life na hin cause am, because I dupe people. Buh sha, I no wan open another account, na why. If not, I go don open am dey dupe them go, but me don change sha."

"Hmm!" I just release breeze comot my nose.

"Kon teach me how you dey do am nah?" I tok. Emeka laff roll comot seat. I just dey there dey look am.

"Chiboy, na talent o. If you no get am come from birth, you no go fit sabi am o."

"I no fit learn am?"

"E no go fit be like am o," Emeka tok. "If e no be panadol, e no fit be panadol."

"Emeka, just dey teach me nah. I go dey pay you salary."

"You no fit pay my money, Chiboy."

"Tok your price first nah."

"You fit pay 50k per month?" Emeka tok. Hin eyes show say hin dey serious. "I get plenty people wey I don teach this kine business wey den don even do freedom from my hand sef."

"Emeka! How nah? You nor even dey sabi you real real abi? I be your guy from day one, you don forget?"

"I know, but na real matter I don clear you so. Pay my money. I go change you comot for mugun but you for mogul."

I just dey look Emeka with one kine eyes. Abi na lie hin dey tok? How hin go dey teach people 419 tutorial dey collect money? Okay, why hin shop never big pass as e dey? Why be say na beke business hin dey do, ordinary rice and beans business? Yet this Emeka of a thing dey owe me close to 20k for some bags of rice and beans wey hin never still pay sef.

"Emeka, if true true you dey teach person 419 dey collect money, how e kon be say you never still get motor? U no get house wey you build, na 'face me I woze you' house you still dey live.

Emeka laff.

"You no sabi nathing," he tok. "Wait until next year mey I carry you go my hometown show you the kine structure wey I don lay down there. Na roofing level I dey already. You siddon there, you hear?"

"Why you nor fit build the house for Lagos nah? I no believe you."

"Kai! True, true Chiboy, you be bastard Ndigbo. How you dey yarn that kine rubbish nah? Mey I build my house for Lagos, tufiakwa? You no remember biafra war? E go shock you wen den go tell everyone mey e dey go back hin papa land. Me go just jejelly waka go inside my mansion for my town while you go kon beg me mey I accomodate you. True true, you don ever see igbo guys dey build house for Lagos when den get their hometown for East?"

As next day reach, me and Emeka don enter motor go Ajegunle where Olagoke bank branch dey. We first go one cafe way no far from the bank so we go fimt send the email and bulk sms. Emeka say mey we no use phone send the email.

That Emeka clever die. Hin send the bulk SMS enter Gone phone the same time as hin send the email too. Emeka kon use one sense:

Dear Olagoke, a credit transaction occured on your account at 10am, December 20, 2013....
Pls note, due to network problem, you can only withdraw your cash in your bank branch either through your ATM Card or over the counter for the next 24-hours. Thank you for banking with us.

Emeka tap me say mey we dey hurry go the bank one time. Quick quick we don dey rush go there.

Every young guy wey we dey see dey enter bank na hin we dey suspect. When we reach bank, Emeka tok say mey I enter bank say hin go dey the ATM machine area dey watch. Na both of us kuku get phone for hand. Hin tok say mey I call am if I don enter bank. Hin too go dey call am for that side. If hin phone ring like this, work don do be that.

"Mey I stay outside nah, Emeka. You go inside," I first tok, but Emeka no agree, so I begin get ready mey I go inside.

Emeka dey ATM place dey wait am. One small queue kon go dey for front of that glass door sha. Why nah? Make this thing no spoil our show nah?

E soon reach my turn. As I enter the door so wey the door close round me, I turn my neck look the door wey be exit door kon see one guy inside. I call Titi Facebook inside the door wey I dey kon see say the guy wey dey next door dey look inside hin phone.

"What?!" I shock. "So that guy na Olagoke Adeyemo. I turn sharply inside the door wey don open for me mey I enter bank. Chai! the door no fit open mey I go out again. Na only inside I fit enter. I run enter inside sharply kon go stay for exit door.

E be like say that Olagoke turn hin face see me as I dey enter that time. I run call Emeka say the guy just comot bank now now.
"Emeka, I see Olagoke nah. The guy wear one yellow shirt with jeans. Hin just comot inside bank now."

"Sho o!" Emeka shock. "E no fit escape. Mey I call am first."

E no reach one minute when I comot go outside. I see Emeka wey dey look about like say hin dey find 50kobo coins wey roll comot hin leaking pocket.

"Emeka! How far nah? I see the guy now now nah!"

"I no see am o!" Emeka tok. "I call am hin number no go."

Quick, we don distribute ourself go right and left. We must not allow this guy escape. To me, e be like say na escape hin escape so. Abi which kine jax hin use sef?

My facebook alert me. Na my FB Titi:

Chibuzor, you think you're smart, abi? Sometimes Yoruba guys are smarter, fool!

I find Emeka show am the message.

"Chineke!" Emeka shout hold hin head.

Another message enter:

I have gone too far. You can't catch me, you and your friend. I saw you when you were both coming together. By then I was queuing inside the bank exit door. Thanks to your pix on facebook which makes me recognise you on time.

"Chai! Odere bird don escape be that," I tok.

"E no possible," Emeka tok.

"This one don por!" I tok. How we wan take do am now? The guy don go nah.

Emeka begin bite hin lip dey calculate.

"Mey we enter streets first," Emeka tok at last. "You pass their, me go pass here."

Emeka enter one dirty street, me sef enter another dirty one. Roforofo and stubborn water just full everywhere because of rain wey fall overnight.

One motor even splash dirty water for the white cloth wey I wear. I call Emeka after ten minutes. Hin tok say hin never see Olagoke.

As I dey waka up and down for under the hot sun, Goke message enter. Hin dey make jest of me:

Ten of una no fit catch me, Emeka. I don tey for this business, no be today."

Chai! E pain me enter bone.

I dey ontop my bed dey sleep now, sure you guys dey inside hot sun dey find me up and down, mumu dem."

As I hear that thing, my moral go down. I don use sweat stain my cloth sef. Na going home things be the issue now.

I begin call Emeka buh hin number no wan go again. The #500 wey remain that time for my hand I remember say I give Emeka say mey hin use am buy cafe ticket to take browse. Hin never give me the #350 balance and na hin we wan take enter motor back. How we go do am now?

I call Emeka so tey my battery begin low. The guy phone no just dey go again. My common sense tell me say mey I dey waka go bank whether hin go fit come back there mey hin kon find me.

Emeka dey complain say hin battery dey low when we dey browse for cafe that time, so hin battery fit don flat. I trek twenty minutes go the bank again, but me no see Emeka when I reach there.

I begin dey wait am whether hin fit come back. I no get choice since when be say I no get chichi with me and I no fit trek nah! No be trekkable thing at all.

Now I don spend like 1hour 30minutes from the time wey I see Olagoke that time.

Kai! I don suffer. Na mey I kon dey beg molue conductors up and down now whether den fit carry me free. I go dey hang for door mouth dey do like thug so den go fit think say I be one of them.

I remember that year wey I be kondo. If Agbero boys pull you comot bus, your driver leave you go, you go kon dey hang for any other bus wey you see dey tell dem you be kondo like dem so den go fit carry you go front small till you go hook up with your bus again.

Omo iko sha. That guy eeh, hin don leave me run many times. I remember when LASTMA wan hayaj our bus. Me go dey call people for wrong place say mey den kon enter na so LASTMA sight us begin dey pursue us come. Omo iko just put fire for bus dey speed go. I run mey I fit catch the bus but my hand no reach am till LASTMA catch me. They beat me like drum.

As I say mey I dey waka comot the bank dey go bus stop na hin message enter again:

Chibulolo the smart maga, now I am jejelistically leaving the bank premise. I am at the gate now. How? Sure I no comot bank that time. I enter back sharply as I sight your guy wey dey wait me for outside--saw you leaving the bank and I was like--oh, lucky me."

As Olagoke dey look down still dey press hin phone for gate wey me sef dey, na inside my hands hin enter straight.

Immediately na hin one ogbonge upper cut hit me for jaw. I shout leave the guy. Immediately, hin don begin run.

I follow am dey shout thief! thief! thief!

The guy no even waste time at all. Hin don enter inside one compound before anybody go fit do anything. E don miss kpatakpata.

"Wey am?" people just they ask up and down, but Olagoke don disappear already. Na that time Emeka kon dey waka come.

Emeka don mess up big time joor. Where hin dey when I need am pass? Hin just dey waka come like person wey den don starve for many days.

Emeka eye red wen I see am.

"Wetin do you, Emeka?" I ask am. Hin left eye don red well well. My own jaw sef don swell up like boil.

"I go catch wrong guy," Emeka whisper like person wey wan faint. "The guy sef wear Yellow
top kon wear blue jeans as you describe am nah!"

"Ah! hin kon sama you slap for face abi?"

"This one pass slap, Chiboy. E pass slap abeg."

"Wetin he do you nah?"

"I no even know sef," Emeka dey yawn. "Na backhand the guy take sampaper my face; the ring wey hin wear just land for inside my eyes straight. Hin beat me silly, carry me throway ground wella before I get opportunity take escape."

"You mean am?" I tok, then Emeka see my jaw.

"Chiboy! Wetin be this?" he begin point my face.

"Na Goke o," I confessed.

"You see am?"

"I catch am sef."

"Wetin kon happen?" Emeka dey look me with one kine funny eyes.

"The guy give me hooking for jaw na so hin take escape o!" I tok.

Emeka vex as I tok that thing.

"Chibuzor, why you let the guy escape nah?"

"You wan blame me abi? Why you no dey here that time mey you help me? Na immediately wey I grab am hin give me that upper cut. I never even prepare for ram."

"You be loser joor!" Emeka shout ontop my head.

"You nko? Wetin you be? Winner?" I give am straight. Me wey I don dey provoke since.

"Give me my money wey dey with you mey I dey go, Emeka," I stretch my hand for hin front.

"You deaf?" Emeka hala dey shine face. "You no hear say person beat me? He don collect all the money nah!"

"E no concern me!" I begin row for hin head. "Na trek you wan mey I trek reach home?"

Emeka look me shock.

"En-hen, you sure say you no get any money for hand again?"

"Chingbain wey small pass I no get. Emeka, no they yarn that kine yarn for here at all. Give me my money mey I dey go."

That day, we nearly blame ourselves. As we reach bus-stop say mey we even enter any bus wey we see dey beg kondo, na hin one kine heavy rain begin pour again.

Chai! I no fit forget that kine day for my life. If no be Omo Iko bus wey pass road luckily for us, we for just tanda gidigba there.

Olagoke Adeyemo don even send me many messages wey I never look. I no say e no fit pass make hin dey make jest of person.

The thing pain us enter bone so tey we no fit tell anybody wetin do us for jaw and eye.

Na so my attention shift comot from FB Titi back to the Titi wey I know for real life.

Now I see say I don tey for that seat dey think about wetin don happen pass. Na one usher even kon tap me come back to real life when hin see say e don tey when I don shake my body last.

Now I check my wristwatch see say I don spend like 2 hours dey think of wetin don happen for the past.

As I look front ontop pulpit mey I hear wetin den still dey yarn, na Titi I see wey dey waka go upstage.

She first sing one praise and worship song. E be like say she wan kon share testimony of wetin God don do for ram since beginning of year.

I say mey I listen hear whether she go mention how she take maga me give am 3k that time. Abi who provide that money give am sef?

As she begin dey share her testimony, I begin listen wella. I nor even know whether she sabi say I come her church that day sef. She for see me if to say I stand up that time wey den say make newcomers stand up. Na surprise attack I wan give the girl. I don make up my mind say I go approach am again propose new year marriage give am immediately we enter 2014.

Titi sing finish enter her testimony. Na the last aspect of hin testimony shock me pass wheb she say:

"And lastly but not the least. I have found him. The bone of my bone. The flesh of my flesh. The sugar in my tea. The one I can lean on..."

Omo, kon see as clap wan tear person ear comot, yet she no stop those kine yarn. Me sef get hope whether she fit just mention my name sef.

"...my future partner...my heart...my love...His name is...OLAGOKE ADEYEMO!"

E just be like say person dey use stick drum my eardrum. I open mouth gasp for breeze.

"Chineke!!" I shout hold my head.

Hahaha!

Chai....e pain/shock am

Pukka36:
Hahaha!


Chai....e pain/shock am

lol

I rub my eyes like say stone don enter ram. The thing nor fit see clearly again o. Abi no be Titi dey front so? How manage? How Titi go dey share that kind testimony for new year day? Over my dead body! I tok kon snap my fingers.

My body just dey shake like person wey just stop dey sniff cocaine. Abi na Parkinson disease I develop suddenly? Person wey I love wan kon go marry person wey I hate. Kasala go burst today.

Pastor begin do new year prayer:

"Yes, we are in the new year 2014. Can someone give a loud shout to the lord!!?"

Titi begin scatter ground with her loud shout kon dey raise her hands like say she wan touch ceiling. Me just open one eyes down like Nokia torchlight phone wey no fit off again.

Bomb scatter church suddenly. Guy, the thing too too sound joor. Nobody fit even think say Boko Haram don enter Lagos. Kon see race. Titi don evaporate sharperly.

"Come back! Come back we have not collected our offering!" Pastor begin shout loud, but church Don scatter already. "It is just mere banger! Banger! please come back to pay your offerings. Offering time..."

Na only pastor dey for that one o. This one wey we don dey here tay tay say Boko Haram wan bomb places for January 1. Na that banger sound remind people of that thing wey kon put fear for everybody mind. The roof of church don even catch fire sef. Na some ushers run go fetch fire extinguisher take off am. Nobody show face say Na him throw the banger enter church.

Stampede don happen for entrance as people dey rush comot for church. Yet, Titi no even dey where I fit see am. Chai! Yoloba girls too dey fear mheen!!!

Who kon throw those heavy banger enter church nah? This one wey be say no other church for that street open church crossover programme, person kon still get the gut dey frighten people wey risk their life come out for midnight for the crossover service.

If no be Titi way I find come church, me for dey my house dey rest sef. Now na bad news I kon use my ears hear. Anyway, things never spoil at all at all. That wedding no go hold Na Hin be the thing. Na me must marry Titi, no matter what.

One mind tell me say mey I go meet pastor for front tell am wetin happen, but the second mind tell me say make I get patient small.

I begin waka go my house fold my hands together like person wey don bedwet. I see where den dey roast suya Na so I branch. Na #100 dey hand, but e go fit reach me chop small suya Na. I join the suya queue like 'oya'.

The mallam sharp die, just like Hin knife. I remember those years wey mallam dey deal with the Lagosians home and away. Den go kill yourba for north kon kill dem for their backyard(Agege)again. Na OPC bring abrupt end to that kine thing o.

Sharply, the 'Northerner' don run butcher the meat roll am inside newspaper for me kon sama pepper and onion on top for me. Na garri me dey like use suya chop o, but this time around me go just eat am like that because me no wan use garri start new year, else, person no go get money take eat real food throughout the year. Na dat kine believe grandma slice my head put.

As one chunk of suya enter my mouth like this, my heart vibrate like say my Tecno phone dey right inside my ribs dey vibrate. Na my conscience grip me so.

"Wetin happen?" I ask myself. Na my brain function like mouth reply me say, "You just chop your offering money."

"Chi mo! For new year? Kai! I don enter ram."

Re: AS E DEY HAPPEN (PIDGIN TORY WEY SWEET WELLA)
« #46 : 11 November 2014, 06:02:38 »
January 1, 2014
7am-9pm

The food way I cook for new year nor even sweet for my mouth at all. If I know I for allow that girl help me cook the food; that girl way wan make sure say she get me by all means. If to say I invite her to cook for me, she nor go think twice before she go gree but Titi go dey do yanga if to say na her.

I receive some text message way dey wish me happy new year. Now na another year we dey so, yet the person way I wan marry I never sabi am. Maybe make I begin do sharp guy joor. Emeka don invite me say make I follow am go club many times but I go dey tell am say I no like that kine thing. Maybe I fit see one babe for club, who know. E be like say this night na me and Emeka go gather go that club house.

Emeka hold me kon shake me like Tecno phone way dey vibrate.

"Yes! Now you sef don dey think like big man! I like your decision, Emeka. No P, I go carry you go tonight. I go spend on you so tey..."

"Eh, eh, eh...I no send you message o Nneemeka. Wetin I dey find go there na housewife, nothing else."

"Wife?" Emeka laugh. "Wife for club?"

"Yes na!" I tok kon give Emeka one close look. "You think say good girls no go dey there abi?"

"Well. Me no tok say dem no fit dey o. But wait o, you no dey run that Titi rons again?"

"Forgot that one joor, she don get owner jare."

"How you take sabi?" Emeka ask me with strong face.

"She share testimony for church today. She tok say na Olagoke Adeyemo be her Mister Right. Me don give up jare."

"Olagoke? That 419?"

"Yes o, na him."

"Come, Wetin you kon dey yarn here? Make we treat that guy fvck up nah!"

"How we go do am?" I ask Emeka. Emeka whisper inside my ears. I laugh. E go good like that jare.

Me and Emeka meet for junction around that kine 8pm. Me don Behind wella. I go make sure say I see person woo tonight wella.

The DJ just dey start when we reach the club. The music just dey rock like wetin happen. People begin step to dance floor. Me sef join them like say I don tey for clubbing too. Na second time way I go taste bear be that.

That DJ sabi mic songs abeg. I just dey feel am well. One babe roll come my side. We begin dance together. She tall kon dey pretty. She discover say I no fit dance so she begin help me. Me just count myself lucky say I don see fresh fish. Suddenly, she begin roll comot for my side just the way wey she take roll come before. I roll follow am. She don face another guy sha.

I look myself. Wetin wrong nah. I no bad for handsomeness and appearance na. I raise my face make I see who be that guy way wan hijack Sandra, the girl wey dey dance with me. Our two faces meet each other. Na Olagoke Adeyemo!!!

Now I kon sabi wetin den dey call interlude for film. I just shock so tey I no fit do anything. Hin too halt Hin dance kon dey stare for my face. The space of time wey both of us no talk go fit do three advertisements come back.

"Titilayo Adelanwa," I tok point finger for hin face. "You are under arrest!"

SammyO4real:
Re: AS E DEY HAPPEN (PIDGIN TORY WEY SWEET WELLA)
« #46 : 11 November 2014, 06:02:38 »
January 1, 2014
7am-9pm

The food way I cook for new year nor even sweet for my mouth at all. If I know I for allow that girl help me cook the food; that girl way wan make sure say she get me by all means. If to say I invite her to cook for me, she nor go think twice before she go gree but Titi go dey do yanga if to say na her.

I receive some text message way dey wish me happy new year. Now na another year we dey so, yet the person way I wan marry I never sabi am. Maybe make I begin do sharp guy joor. Emeka don invite me say make I follow am go club many times but I go dey tell am say I no like that kine thing. Maybe I fit see one babe for club, who know. E be like say this night na me and Emeka go gather go that club house.

Emeka hold me kon shake me like Tecno phone way dey vibrate.

"Yes! Now you sef don dey think like big man! I like your decision, Emeka. No P, I go carry you go tonight. I go spend on you so tey..."

"Eh, eh, eh...I no send you message o Nneemeka. Wetin I dey find go there na housewife, nothing else."

"Wife?" Emeka laugh. "Wife for club?"

"Yes na!" I tok kon give Emeka one close look. "You think say good girls no go dey there abi?"

"Well. Me no tok say dem no fit dey o. But wait o, you no dey run that Titi rons again?"

"Forgot that one joor, she don get owner jare."

"How you take sabi?" Emeka ask me with strong face.

"She share testimony for church today. She tok say na Olagoke Adeyemo be her Mister Right. Me don give up jare."

"Olagoke? That 419?"

"Yes o, na him."

"Come, Wetin you kon dey yarn here? Make we treat that guy fvck up nah!"

"How we go do am?" I ask Emeka. Emeka whisper inside my ears. I laugh. E go good like that jare.

Me and Emeka meet for junction around that kine 8pm. Me don Behind wella. I go make sure say I see person woo tonight wella.

The DJ just dey start when we reach the club. The music just dey rock like wetin happen. People begin step to dance floor. Me sef join them like say I don tey for clubbing too. Na second time way I go taste bear be that.

That DJ sabi mic songs abeg. I just dey feel am well. One babe roll come my side. We begin dance together. She tall kon dey pretty. She discover say I no fit dance so she begin help me. Me just count myself lucky say I don see fresh fish. Suddenly, she begin roll comot for my side just the way wey she take roll come before. I roll follow am. She don face another guy sha.

I look myself. Wetin wrong nah. I no bad for handsomeness and appearance na. I raise my face make I see who be that guy way wan hijack Sandra, the girl wey dey dance with me. Our two faces meet each other. Na Olagoke Adeyemo!!!

Now I kon sabi wetin den dey call interlude for film. I just shock so tey I no fit do anything. Hin too halt Hin dance kon dey stare for my face. The space of time wey both of us no talk go fit do three advertisements come back.

"Titilayo Adelanwa," I tok point finger for hin face. "You are under arrest!"

If you go dull yourself this time around na you sabi am oo

classiclee:

If you go dull yourself this time around na you sabi am oo

[color=#990000][/color]Trust me, this time it's not gonna happen!!

I bin dey tink sey update don land O!

SammyO4real:
[color=#990000][/color]Trust me, this time it's not gonna happen!!

nigga, how far, give us ur website, we go read am dia

Note: This STORY and other EBIAG STORIES are available in PDF and EPUB format which you can purchase through attachment to your e-mail address or by coming down to our office, EBIAG NIGERIA, 5/9 MOHAMMED STREET, SANTOS LAYOUT, AKOWONJO, LAGOS.

Other stories you can get written by the same author are:

1. Hope And The Island of Greatness
2. We Are Able
3. Everybody Is A Genius
4. Honeymoon In Prison
5. I wanna Win
6. The Changed Criminal
7. Political Crinkum Crankum
8. Laisser Moi Tranquille (French Story)
9. Bella Benson (Nigerian High School Musicals)
10. Devil's Prey
11. Goats In Uniform
12. Suicide Note, etc.

You can also have award-winning stories written for you in your own name by Sammy O. Contact Sammy O. on FACEBOOK: Sammy Oh; Twitter: SammyEbiag and Whatsapp/Call: 08138410839.
Website: www.ebiag.com is under reconstruction to fit our needs.

Note that the WE ARE ABLE story is now in prints and currently selling at promo price. Note, you can win up to #250,000 annually or #10,000 weekly by buying the hard copies or subscribing to the PDF and E-PUB version of any of our stories.

We Also Offer Home Coaching Services in all SUBJECTS, seeking to explore the talents in you or your children/Ward.

Visit us today at EBIAG NIGERIA, 5/9 MOHAMMED STREET, SANTOS LAYOUT, AKOWONJO LAGOS or Lekki-Ajah Office, Addo-Badore Road.

Call: 08138410839

EBIAG= Every Body Is A Genius

YES YOU ARE IF YOU BELIEVE SO!!!

January 1
9pm-11:30pm

Olagoke Adeyemo turn say make hin run, but me don sharply grab am for trouser-that kine area wey police go grab you wey you no go fit free yourself. Olagoke Adeyemo wan run drive one punch enter my stomach but I sharply grab hin hand. Fight begin immediately.

I carry am throway for ground kon sit on top am dey give am thorough beating. I punch hin face left and right so tey the guy just dey restless. People wey dey around just dey look us like say e no concern them.

Goke suddenly sink hin teeth enter my shoulder. I shout kon leave am immediately. Chai! That bite too pain person abeg.

Goke stand up begin run. I chase am. Hin phone fall down but hin no know. The guy don escape. At least me don pay am back with hin own coin. The uppercut wey he give me that day, I don use many blow replace am today. Hin eyes don swell up every angle.

Emeka don drink to stupor. The guy don even vomit for one corner sef. Na 10:30pm we dey already o. Me wan begin dey waka now, but me no go fit leave Emeka alone o. The guy don drink himself to unconsciousness kon go hibernate for mosquito corner.

"Emeka! Emeka! Me wan dey go joor!" I tok.

"No disturb me," Emeka tok. "Go bring truck make e carry me for here because me don dey heavy," Emeka begin tear laugh.

All hin mouth just dey smell alcohol.

Wetin I go do now? Me no wan pass my night for club house joor o. I check my time again, 10:35pm don knack. Bus fit no dey to take go house again o. E be like say me go leave Emeka for there dey go my house o.

I pull Emeka comot for ground but the guy just slip comot my hand like banana peel kon put another gear for hin sleeping mode like fat pig. I don try jare. Time to waka.

Goke phone begin ring for inside my pocket. I bring am come outside my pocket. Na Titi dey call am.

"Hmm," I smile. Now me go fit control Titi small if I fit alter my voice small make e be like Goke own. I pick the call.

"Hello, Darling," I tok dey wait for her response.

"Baby, where are you?" Titi ask.

"Em..." I pause. I just remember say my English no good at all. If I tok, Titi fit kana say no be Goke dey tok to ram. I no Wetin I go do jare. I cut the call. Quick, I whatsapp am.

"Hi," I tok. Quick, I don begin dey study the pattern wey Olagoke dey take respond am for whasapp before. Na the same pattern I go follow jare. I load previous messages for the whatsapp see how Goke dey flow.

"Why did you end the call?" Titi whatsapped me.

"I, er...I just feel that doing whatsapp is preferable at the moment, darling. How are you?"

"Cool, and you?"

" Doing fine. Ain't you going to sleep darling?" I chat.

" I don't feel like sleeping. I'm just thinking about you..." Titi reply me.

All my posts na copy and paste of the chat wey the two of them do for December 25, Christmas day. Me don kuku take control of the chat. Na me dey speak, na she dey respond.

"Titibabe, I'm fine here and I can't stop thinking about you too."

"Hmm...I know that's what you will say. Awwww!"
Titi respond.

"Sincerely I am missing you like aargh! I just want you by my side today, Christmas, but it's a pity we didn't get to see each other till now. I hope we can meet on new year day," I say. I begin wait for Titi response. I no sabi say I don do big mistake.

"Goke, what are you saying? We are in new year day for Christ sake!"

I no kuku dey read her post again, so I no sabi say she dey ask me question. Me just continue with the next post:

"Sincerely babe, when can we meet each other? I can't imagine that I haven't met you face to face since June 12 when we met online."

"Goke! But we have met on December 29 nah!"

"Okay when and where should we meet?" I copy kon paste as usual. "Are you for real, babe?"

"Goke! Goke! Goke!"

"Will you marry me?" I paste am. Even me sef no dey read Wetin I dey post since. I just dey copy and paste chronologically. Now I check Wetin I dey post and Wetin she dey response. Chai! Kasala don burst o. All the chat wey den don do since last week na hin me dey repost.

"Are you crazy Goke? Have I not told you yes last week on Christmas day?" Titi reply. I see the response. Shock grip me. Chekwe!

I raise my face comot for the phone. Guess Wetin I see. Olagoke Adeyemo! The guy don arrange five big guys follow am.

"Wey that guy?" they begin rake. I see pistol for one of them hand. I don enter ram today.
[/b]




Note: This STORY and other EBIAG STORIES are available in PDF and EPUB format which you can purchase through attachment to your e-mail address or by coming down to our office, EBIAG NIGERIA, 5/9 MOHAMMED STREET, SANTOS LAYOUT, AKOWONJO, LAGOS.

Other stories you can get written by the same author are:

1. Hope And The Island of Greatness
2. We Are Able
3. Everybody Is A Genius
4. Honeymoon In Prison
5. I wanna Win
6. The Changed Criminal
7. Political Crinkum Crankum
8. Laisser Moi Tranquille (French Story)
9. Bella Benson (Nigerian High School Musicals)
10. Devil's Prey
11. Goats In Uniform
12. Suicide Note, etc.

You can also have award-winning stories written for you in your own name by Sammy O. Contact Sammy O. on FACEBOOK: Sammy Oh; Twitter: SammyEbiag and Whatsapp/Call: 08138410839.
Website: www.ebiag.com is under reconstruction to fit our needs.

Note that the WE ARE ABLE story is now in prints and currently selling at promo price. Note, you can win up to #250,000 annually or #10,000 weekly by buying the hard copies or subscribing to the PDF and E-PUB version of any of our stories.

We Also Offer Home Coaching Services in all SUBJECTS, seeking to explore the talents in you or your children/Ward.

Visit us today at EBIAG NIGERIA, 5/9 MOHAMMED STREET, SANTOS LAYOUT, AKOWONJO LAGOS or Lekki-Ajah Office, Addo-Badore Road.

Call: 08138410839

EBIAG= Every Body Is A Genius

YES YOU ARE IF YOU BELIEVE SO!!!

big bros... Abeg cum update ur tori.... Sey i no fit wait againoooh

Bross nice story please kindly come and update ...m ur biggest fan from #EVERYBODY IS A GENIUS#...

Op, thanks 4 d tori

Dansun

Dani4tech