After answering my question regarding why they have two different marriage lists:the one for outside suitors and the other for suitors who are from the village. The elderly man called me and said," my son listen and listen good. The reason you must marry from within your culture is "Maka adighi amama Onicha gwara Obosi" (I.e.in case of necessities Onitsha told Obosi).What I gathered the man means can be summarised thus: If I picked a wife from within my culture my wife who already must have been in the know about the dos and don'ts of our culture might not offend them. However,if in any likely event she happened to break the rules her own people would understand that yes their own daughter actually transgressed. But this might not be the case if our cultural backgrounds differred. This elderly man went ahead to cite an instance in Igbo culture where a woman is forbidden to kill a fowl or a goat. And I asked him why. Then the man said,because if women were empowered by traditions to kill anything. Then they would not only kill and eat up a full chicken while their husband was away in the farm,but would thereby become experts in killing and so could kill their husband at will. Interesting."Papa", I called, " could that explain the reason why you placed taboo on gizzard,stating that women must under no circumstance eat it in order for you men to checkmate them?" Papa is yet to answer this question. Now do you believe,judging by this story, that men have been deceiving women since the world was young and innocent?

Many societal and cultural rules are very unfair to the women folk. Like in the case of adultry most times is the woman that suffers while majority forget that it takes two to tango. The husband could even turn her to a punching bag, but if the table turns she has no option than to forgive.

when you mean culture what do you mean


are u a non igbo trying to marry into igbo culture


try and be specific



maka ihe o gwara o

kahara:
After answering my question regarding why they have two different marriage lists:the one for outside suitors and the other for suitors who are from the village. The elderly man called me and said," my son listen and listen good. The reason you must marry from within your culture is "Maka adighi amama Onicha gwara Obosi" (I.e.in case of necessities Onitsha told Obosi).What I gathered the man means can be summarised thus: If I picked a wife from within my culture my wife who already must have been in the know about the dos and don'ts of our culture might not offend them. However,if in any likely event she happened to break the rules her own people would understand that yes their own daughter actually transgressed. But this might not be the case if our cultural backgrounds differred. This elderly man went ahead to cite an instance in Igbo culture where a woman is forbidden to kill a fowl or a goat. And I asked him why. Then the man said,because if women were empowered by traditions to kill anything. Then they would not only kill and eat up a full chicken while their husband was away in the farm,but would thereby become experts in killing and so could kill their husband at will. Interesting."Papa", I called, " could that explain the reason why you placed taboo on gizzard,stating that women must under no circumstance eat it in order for you men to checkmate them?" Papa is yet to answer this question. Now do you believe,judging by this story, that men have been deceiving women since the world was young and innocent?

[quote author=tonychristopher post=34108799]when you mean culture what do you mean


are u a non igbo trying to marry into igbo culture


try and be specific



maka ihe o gwara o




I am igbo. I was simply interrogating the man because we are from the same village and I discovered to my dislike that in my village they have two different lists. He was telling me why I shouldn't go far and marry wen I choose to do so.

yes...that is how they want to roll so be it

but the list is imaterial..what matters is the girls parents [quote author=kahara post=34123055][/quote]