vfactor:
29? U still young na!

For ur mind abi?

MarvellousGod:
Since you don't love him, please stay clear.. Don't go into marriage out of pity... You have known him for over 2yrs, yet no feeling whatsoever. How sure are you it'll come after marriage?



Btw, you call him poor yet still go to him for financial aid.. SMH for you. ..

her reasons for not loving him are so superficial, those attributes which have nothing to do with having a loving/caring man and peaceful home.
she has made her dislikes known already - ugliness and low salary, such reasons are least expected of a matured lady.
Mr Rights are scarce nowadays but when you meet Mr Left, jejely take hold of him and drag him to the right ...

libertyfather:

For ur mind abi?

No! For nairaland! Make she reach 35 first! Then she will not worry bout whether the man is presentable or not!

You are not physically nor emotionally-attracted to him. These are very important when it comes to dating and definitely when it comes to settling down with someone. If, after 2+ years, these are still non-existent with regards to how you feel about him, you ought to move on.

I'm enjoying the critics already, y'all should go on even those that can't choose good character over beauty have the nerves to criticise too

Ronald4lif I sight you, remember it's your friend oh

Hmmmmm...reminds me of that Celine dion song when the wrong one loves you right


Lalasticlala help move this ministry go fp biko

@OP, did we fall from the same tree?? I'm also facing same issues and it's driving me crazy,

I'm also a 29 year old beautiful lady but in my case there are rich, young men asking for my hand in marriage but the feelings is just not there. i want to marry for love and not just social status.

whoever said love is not an emotion but decision is definitely lying, love is both emotions and decision; i can decide to love you but once the emotions isn't coming naturally my sister it's only Mechanical(I believe you are not an Engineer)

Marrying someone you don't love with the hope that love will grow is risky, you shouldn't gamble with stuffs like that. if you are a Christian you know what "for better, for worse" means...divorce is def. not an option

I'd like to refer you to Leke Alder's Jack n Jill Live on FB, you would know there's more to this your issue than what people think. I'm wearing your shoes and i know how it feels.

Above all pray to God for directions, all the best, I'm talking plenty already. I'm out of here!!!

irishCream:
Dear Family I'm in deep shiiit, so confused on what to do right now.

I just turned 29 few days ago and have been out of a serious relationship for over a year now.

Have been waiting patiently for that right man to come along but unfortunately it only the wrong ones that keep coming my way, they just want to have a feel of my sweet body and off they go, no genuine intentions.

Now there's a brother that have been friendzoning for over two years now yet he keep persisting, good a thing I'm not the type that pretends so I told him from day one he asked me out that I'm not interested in him except on friendship level, I told him I don't feel him emotionally but he keep hanging on hoping I change my mind with time, my reasons for rejecting him is cos to me he's not presentable enough and I can't be proud introducing him to my people and again he got no good paid job (why on earth must he be poor and ugly at the same time, what kind of torture is that ). He's just managing in a private firm that pays less than 50k.

But what makes me have a rethink is the character of this my friendzoned brother, he keeps in touch despite my rejecting him, he even offer little financial assistance when I'm in need, when I asked him why he's doing all these to a girl that openly reject him he claims he has faith that I'll consider him one day, sometimes I'm forced to suspect if he has cast a spell on me so another good man won't come my way.

Now he has called to schedule a date tomorrow and I know as usual he wants to remind me that the year is running that I should consider his request since he hope to settle down this year.

Please dear Family advice me accordingly is it advisable I say yes to a man I don't feel a thing for emotionally? Can I ever get to love him? I do hear love grows but I don't believe in such!!!

@ the highlighted... That's a lil rude na.. don't u think? abeg don't make that man's life a living hell by agreeing to a relationship with him .. keep on waiting for your Mr Perfect. Ok!

Gbam

MissSlimbody:
You don't have to say yes to him because the right man hasn't come along.

Never go into a relationship out of pity or desperation.

irishCream is a broke ass girl who wants a rich dude she can flaunt to her friends...

She doesn't know that been rich requires consistent hard work..

She wants to reap where she did not sow

My current problem, except mine is neither ugly or broke.

It's like the gods are forcing me on this guy

No flame.

jaybee3:


You're welcome

PS: Please don't let the society pressure you. 29 is not too old except early marriage was one of your goals growing up. Make yourself attractive by being extremely successful in all your endeavors and see good quality men troop around you . Know and appreciate your worth so you get valued like a princess you ought to be.

Life is for the living so let the world be your oyster

Sadly, the bolded is a lie.
She will most probably end up chasing all the men away.

[size=18pt]People telling you are young, you still have time, dont rush ...blahblah are your enemy.

A woman finds it difficult to get pregnant at ages above 30.

Some even reach menopause at age 35.

You have no time.

However, if you dont love that 50k per month man, dont marry him. Love is important in a marriage.

My advise to you is to soft-pedal on your standard.

I want a God fearing man, who is handsome, rich, has big d**ck, descent, tall....

If this man exists, he will be hot cake for other girls.

Do what you wanna do in time.[/size]

U re 29 u still d look for the right man... Wait when u re 39 I will drag the wrong man to the right man.

You can get some hints from the video below.



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vYpo3Z5j0sc

There's no sentiments in love. Wait patiently for someone you will be in love with. Don't ever think of marrying someone out of pity or because of their kindness. You need something that you will see and it will always make you happy. And, never you should financial buoyant to measure love. Let your love for the man you want to live the rest of your life with be natural. I wish you goodluck.

Call it off If you are not proud of been seen with him. He will find a person that is comfortable with his appearance and person. And, you have no reason to feel guilt or bad about this. you will save yourself and the guy from lots of regret.
We all have our taste, are attracted to different looks and appearance. I am sure you will find what you seek, just make yourself available. cheers!

irishCream:
I'm enjoying the critics already, y'all should go on even those that can't choose good character over beauty have the nerves to criticise too

Ronald..4lif I sight you, remember it's your friend oh

Never you marry someone you are not attracted to emotionally/physically just out of pity, loneliness or frustration. Most times no matter how much energy and time you put in the marriage trying to fix your it, you see yourself building up resentment towards him without any reason.

I wonder what sex would be like in such marriage.

Why did you accept gifts from a man you don't love?It's a trap.Who know your date with him will result to rap.e.

I spilled the drink I was sipping when I read this:

why on earth must he be poor and ugly at the same time, what kind of torture is that ). He's just managing in a private firm that pays less than 50k.

Dear Lord, for the sake of humiliation and rejection like this, bless the efforts of your male children so that they can be lovable and attractive to your daughters, and to be able to take care of their needs and loved ones, O Lord I pray thee


Its not as if that guy isn't working hard to be financially buoyant or rich like other men...its not as if he is lazy or extravagant, I think its all about God's favour and destiny.

Meanwhile, do not despise the days of little beginning. From your write-up, the problem isn't his ugly looks but his financial status right now.

Pray for him, but pls don't accept him out of pity. You aren't proud of him, let him go...but pray for him.

It is well

1freshdude:
Call it off If you are not proud of been seen with him. He will find a person that is comfortable with his appearance and person. And, you have no reason to feel guilt or bad about this. you will save yourself and the guy from lots of regret.
We all have our taste, are attracted to different looks and appearance, you are just another mammal. cheers!

I totally agree with you.

Most people who seek opinions already have their minds made up before they ask...They just need support and justification. OP You don't like him, you're not attracted to him, and you don't believe love grows.. What else do you want to hear??

5minsmadness:


Sadly, the bolded is a lie.
She will most probably end up chasing all the men away.

I disagree Sir. Most guys that I know would not even consider any girl perceived as a liability from afar. I live in a country where there is pride in being empowered as a woman. We understand the fact that facial beauty is only temporary and would most certainly not keep the home together in the long run.

As a woman, you need to make yourself attractive by having a lot of things going for you as well as having impeccable personality traits to match.

Remember we (Men) usually have more than one to choose from when in the dating game so why then would any sane man go for the second best?

irishCream:


Please dear Family advice me accordingly is it advisable I say yes to a man I don't feel a thing for emotionally? Can I ever get to love him? I do hear love grows but I don't believe in such!!!

Yes you can
But not a Broke ass!

irishCream:
Dear Family I'm in deep shiiit, so confused on what to do right now.

I just turned 29 few days ago and have been out of a serious relationship for over a year now.

Have been waiting patiently for that right man to come along but unfortunately it only the wrong ones that keep coming my way, they just want to have a feel of my sweet body and off they go, no genuine intentions.

Now there's a brother that have been friendzoning for over two years now yet he keep persisting, good a thing I'm not the type that pretends so I told him from day one he asked me out that I'm not interested in him except on friendship level, I told him I don't feel him emotionally but he keep hanging on hoping I change my mind with time, my reasons for rejecting him is cos to me he's not presentable enough and I can't be proud introducing him to my people and again he got no good paid job (why on earth must he be poor and ugly at the same time, what kind of torture is that ). He's just managing in a private firm that pays less than 50k.

But what makes me have a rethink is the character of this my friendzoned brother, he keeps in touch despite my rejecting him, he even offer little financial assistance when I'm in need, when I asked him why he's doing all these to a girl that openly reject him he claims he has faith that I'll consider him one day, sometimes I'm forced to suspect if he has cast a spell on me so another good man won't come my way.

Now he has called to schedule a date tomorrow and I know as usual he wants to remind me that the year is running that I should consider his request since he hope to settle down this year.

Please dear Family advice me accordingly is it advisable I say yes to a man I don't feel a thing for emotionally? Can I ever get to love him? I do hear love grows but I don't believe in such!!!

The truth is that if you settle down with this guy, you ll cheat on him in the nearest future.

My advice for you: Its good to dream big, its also good to be contempted with whatever you have. You can work on him and make him handsome. The outward appearance can be improve upon easily than the inner character

Well I think you should try and see his potentials,even if he's not man enough for you yet try and see what manner of man he would bcom in future,to say he's poor I think that's an understatement because people can actually achieve greatness,he sees you as his source of joy that will eventually attract good things to come,don't forget angels comes to us in pretty disguises,they don't come to us wearing gold.

just turned 29 few days ago and have been out of a serious relationship for over a year now.


With the man financial status,you. Have put into play,maybe when you get to 39,you will surely change your song.

It do bother me,ladies of nowadays will never ask why their mother married their father who has nothing,and i have discovered that those who cares about the guys financial status most were those ladies whose parent has nothin to see physically.

I finally joined nairaland 2day

5minsmadness:


Sadly, the bolded is a lie.
She will most probably end up chasing all the men away.

You are right.
A successful man attracts girls while a successful woman repels guys