pickabeau1:


So is there a movement(online) or NGO that is campaigning for the abolition of this barbaric custom (as you ladies put it)

is there a twitter campaign

is the issue of brideprice even mentioned in this sudden campaign to highlight women in naija

link pls.

Barbaric? Hmm.

Most of the societal ills are enforced by women on their fellow women so who is discriminating against who.

My prayer is that more and more women have the strength of character to shrug off ignorance in whatever form it presents itself. If someone says you are .............. its not really a problem until you start to believe it or when you hide away in shame.

You have to know and be proud of who you are. You have to be your own best advocate and spend your time making wise and dignified choices. Personally once I am comfortable with the choices that I make, I really do not give a damn what someone who does not really feature in my radar has to say about it. Majority are so unhappy in their lives that they are looking for their unhappy club members.

Silence is golden for a lot of situations and you have to choose which ignorance to dignify with a response.

cococandy:
link pls.

Barbaric? Hmm.

Nope.. that was not my question

I asked you if Nigerian women or any lady who comes online to decry this bride price custom has started even a twitter campaign

Since it demeans women

Have you clamoured for its removal other than stating you don't like it yet you had to comply

Truckpusher:
You'll soon end up like this

Going by the picture, by then gay marriage would be legalized in nigeria

Nigeria will be home of technological advancement in the world

There would be comstant light, good roads, excellent health care, having aids would be like having headache, you go just swallow panadol

infact there would be self driving planes, cars and commercial teleportation would be available by then

All these girls on nairaland will be on the hospital beds and their grandsons or granddaughters who are doctors would be looking after them

as for the men on nairaland..........well.............many of them for don perish by then

..

oseod:



Contrary to the bolded post, Most churches offer "marriage preparatory classes" to teach the man and the woman how to live as a couple, topics on child raising and so on to prepare the couple for the tough times ahead


you might need to specify the churches that prepare only women for marriage

You're actually making reference to church programs formulated to counsel "engaged couples" who attend marriage courses for weeks and sometimes months before their wedding. That's not what I meant. I was talking about church groups organized for women who perceive themselves as coerced, intimidated and worthless by the society for being unmarried. Which most fraudulent pastors have realized their susceptibility and have designed these programs to schooling them how to attract and keep a man. But not without sowing 'seeds' for their financial advantages.

I don't start twitter campaigns.
There are many things that go on in Nigeria that I hate even more than the bride price thing and I've not started a Twitter campaign against them.
It doesn't mean change the fact that I dislike them.

How many twitter campaigns have you started against the 'evils' feminist are wrecking in the earth? Does it mean you're not serious about your dislike for them?

pickabeau1:


Nope.. that was not my question

I asked you if Nigerian women or any lady who comes online to decry this bride price custom has started even a twitter campaign

Since it demeans women

Have you clamoured for its removal other than stating you don't like it yet you had to comply

cococandy:
I don't start twitter campaigns.
There are many things that go on in Nigeria that I hate even more than the bride price thing and I've not started a Twitter campaign against them.
It doesn't mean change the fact that I dislike them.

haha.. so Its just starts and stop
No action in real life.
No campaign
Nothing..

A woman like you campaigned for equal right on inheritance... take note

owKAY

How many twitter campaigns have you started against the 'evils' feminist are wrecking in the earth? Does it mean you're not serious about your dislike for them?

On this... while your retort is unrelated... I will humour you and answer you.

I have said it many times,... feminists are the easiest people to deal with.. you know their stand on any issue
not the pseudo feminists we have online barking but still want to be kept by men

Truckpusher:
I can call their moniker here - Dem go beat me?

Just say it and I will give you a comprehensive list of emotionally battered women association of nairaland,both married ,unmarried and baby mamas

Oh Chim. Abegi no call names biko. Pity them.

I do think Twitter or social media affects opinions but not laws so much. Be it traditional or secular laws. Hence not effective enough for me. But it still works in that the more people say it, the greater chance someone who's among the decisions makers out there will bring it up for consideration.

Btw, I don't do Twitter.. Nairaland is my social media so whatever I have to say, I say here. It doesn't mean I'm not serious about my opinions.
I'm still trying to get what you're implying. Because I haven't started a Twitter campaign, it means whatever else I say about it doesn't count?

How does your second paragraph answer my question. You detest feminists, what have you done about it? When are you going to start a Twitter campaign for polygamy that you advocate?

Does your starting and stopping on Nairaland also not count as no action? you're the only one who's serious but others who haven't started a Twitter are unserious?

pickabeau1:


haha.. so Its just starts and stop
No action in real life.
No campaign
Nothing..

A woman like you campaigned for equal right on inheritance... take note

owKAY



On this... while your retort is unrelated... I will humour you and answer you.

I have said it many times,... feminists are the easiest people to deal with.. you know their stand on any issue
not the pseudo feminists we have online barking but still want to be kept by men

cococandy:
I do think Twitter or social media affects opinions but not laws so much. Be it traditional or secular laws. Hence not effective enough for me. But it still works in that the more people say it, the greater chance someone who's among the decisions makers out there will bring it up for consideration.

Its not effective but effective..duh
Still contradicting yourself


These socialmedia campaigns are powerful especially when backed with an organization

Case in point: Ferguson was a mix of rallies, social media presence which has led to demilitarization of cops using SWAT gear.
Also the cop who body slammed a girl at a party lost his job over the clamour

I'm still trying to get what you're implying. Because I haven't started a Twitter campaign, it means whatever else I say about it doesn't count?

You still don't get it.. let me try one more time

You hate bride price as you said
Has any of you who hate this evil custom campaigned against it

I have seen campaigns against FGM and I support it in any way both financially
I have seen campaigns against child education and I support it

why have women not campaigned against bride price

Let me hazard a guess: women like the 'value' placed on them

Effective but not effective enough, fetch your reading glasses.
Hence my other social media is fine. Those do the job of expressing my opinions. It must not be Twitter to be legit. And Twitter won't make the difference: Maybe it's simple enough now for you to get.

Sometimes I don't like debating with you because before you even start you're already biased to see what you want to see hence its almost always a waste of time. Seriously.

If you haven't started a Twitter campaign for anything you're against in the society, you have no right to ask anyone else why they haven't.
You see the campaign you like and you support anyway you can. We see the campaigns we like and we support anyway we can too.

Everyone is not hashtag starter. So stop asking me silly questions
That's my point.

pickabeau1:


Its not effective but effective..duh
Still contradicting yourself


These socialmedia campaigns are powerful especially when backed with an organization

Case in point: Ferguson was a mix of rallies, social media presence which has led to demilitarization of cops using SWAT gear.
Also the cop who body slammed a girl at a party lost his job over the clamour



You still don't get it.. let me try one more time

You hate bride price as you said
Has any of you who hate this evil custom campaigned against it

I have seen campaigns against FGM and I support it in any way both financially
I have seen campaigns against child education and I support it

why have women not campaigned against bride price

Let me hazard a guess: women like the 'value' placed on them

See words.. silly.. already?
I asked you a simple question.. see your thesis

You hate brideprice but cant seem to do anything about it aside from condemning it yet the culture persists in your community..

You are the one that has a mindset
You partake in a tradition which you deem is now politically incorrect because of your online persona here
Just a few posts ago, someone called you out that you are married just to let other ladies know.. why do u think so?

cococandy:
[s]Effective but not effective enough, fetch your reading glasses.
Hence my other social media is fine. Those do the job of expressing my opinions. It must not be Twitter to be legit. And Twitter won't make the difference: Maybe it's simple enough now for you to get.

Sometimes I don't like debating with you because before you even start you're already biased to see what you want to see hence its almost always a waste of time. Seriously.

If you haven't started a Twitter campaign for anything you're against in the society, you have no right to ask anyone else why they haven't.
You see the campaign you like and you support anyway you can. We see the campaigns we like and we support anyway we can too.

Everyone is not hashtag starter. So stop asking me silly questions
That's my point.
[/s]

cococandy:
I do think Twitter or social media affects opinions but not laws so much. Be it traditional or secular laws. Hence not effective enough for me. But it still works in that the more people say it, the greater chance someone who's among the decisions makers out there will bring it up for consideration.

Btw, I don't do Twitter.. Nairaland is my social media so whatever I have to say, I say here. It doesn't mean I'm not serious about my opinions.
I'm still trying to get what you're implying. Because I haven't started a Twitter campaign, it means whatever else I say about it doesn't count?

How does your second paragraph answer my question. You detest feminists, what have you done about it? When are you going to start a Twitter campaign for polygamy that you advocate?

Does your starting and stopping on Nairaland also not count as no action? you're the only one who's serious but others who haven't started a Twitter are unserious?

Babes,

When he starts a social media (outside NL) campaign for anti-feminism or anti-gayism, then he has the right to talk

Anyone not happy with your pseudo-feminism should start a campaign on twitter about it or open a twitter handle for you.

Marriage = been kept by men

Or marriage for feminists is different from marriage for anti-feminists?

All anti-feminists work and support their husbands... all feminists sit at home and are kept by their husbands

Bunch of jokers

Trying to answer you about whether I partook or not will involve going personal so like I told truckpusher, you're free to believe what you will.
Because even I narrate my marriage procedure for you from beginning to end, you will still believe what you want. Won't you agree with me its point less?

Since the first moment you quoted me, you're already convinced that I don't dislike the bride price culture. If it makes you feel better.

See. It's always a waste of time debating with you because you already believe what you want to believe and enjoy wasting people's time making assumptions on their behalf even when they say other wise.

pickabeau1:
See words.. silly.. already?
I asked you a simple question.. see your thesis

You hate brideprice but cant seem to do anything about it aside from condemning it yet the culture persists in your community..

You are the one that has a mindset
You partake in a tradition which you deem is now politically incorrect because of your online persona here
Just a few posts ago, someone called you out that you are married just to let other ladies know.. why do u think so?

Velocitron:


Honestly, I used to be so hot-headed about these issues when I was younger, like when my aunt would berate me for not enjoying staying in the kitchen 'because I'm a girl' until I stopped to think..so what? Who cares about the few ignorant statements some people make?

If you live in modern educated society, women have the same rights as men. You can hold public office, vote, drive, get married, divorce etc. Of course, male and female privilege and other double standards will continue to exist, millions of years of evolution and societal conditioning make sure of that.

Fewer women than men are interested in STEM courses, starting their own companies or running for higher political posts, it's a self-imposed handicap. You can't sit on your butt demanding 'change' when it's well within your power and rights to do anything you want.

Ok..

Enjoy

cococandy:
Trying to answer you about whether I partook or not will involve going personal so like I told truckpusher, you're free to believe what you will.
Because even I narrate my marriage procedure for you from beginning to end, you will still believe what you want. Won't you agree with me its point less?

Since the first moment you quoted me, you're already convinced that I don't dislike the bride price culture. If it makes you feel better.

See. It's always a waste of time debating with you because you already believe what you want to believe and enjoy wasting people's time making assumptions on their behalf even when they say other wise.

CFCfan:

If folks are serious about equality, they should call for the abolition of bride price. The bride price culture is a strong pillar of the patriarchy in Naija.

Even if BP is abolished in Naija, do you think it would make stuffs better?

Look at India as a case study

#Not for bride price anyways....

njays24:
If I decide to use myself as a yardstick,I might sound arrogant. But I want to put it to you that there are females who make their money legitimately from the scratch without having to sleep their way up. Like I come from a family of business people,business,entrepreneurship is our second nature;both male and female and we're proud of it. We don't work for people,but the other way round. So that's how it is with so many other females. In Nigeria maybe a lot of females compromise,but I'd still say a handful of them don't.

Don't get me wrong... I'm not saying every girl sleeps their way up... I know girls who didn't... who don't... but the percentage of those who do... Lawd!!!
.
I respect the female go getters... to a point... even those that sleeps their way up... much respect... but you see the remaining percentage that sit on their fat asses...And expects we share rights equally and not knowing why God made the male species bigger than the female species... those ones... no respect... I've got no love for them either... you don't even need to be bigger than Dangote before I duff my hat for a female... if what you say is true about yourself... then my respect... you've earned it...

Expsbterror:
Like play like play, this thing is getting seriously serious. Been female.

No doubt it's not easy been female in Africa at large but we have also seen lots of female icons from the same continent and country sef. It's more about determination. Especially in this new age, anything is just possible.
Check it out, about 4 mother's day have been celebrated, female child's day, children's Day, valentine's day (another females day) and now a lot of transgender mutation is going on.. This is enough to show that a female African child has a lot of prospect than in D days.


BTW Y my hand dey pepper me na.?

What surprised me in this post is the men agreeing with everything on that post
That's how the western feminist start, now It has raze their homes. Men are scared of getting married because of divorce rape, now they just fuq as many women as possible. But wait a minute. The only advantage we have other them sef is taken once we reached adulthood. Women have it easy most times

snowDiva:
#truetalk...@Francistony, if what you wrote up there is how you truly reason then kudos...more guys should strive for such open-mindedness...

That one go hard ooo as many Nlander guys don't see that francistony guy as a Real Gee; to many here, he is but another 'womanwrappering' jerk.
...gonna be really really hard .

As in.

bukatyne:


Babes,

When he starts a social media (outside NL) campaign for anti-feminism or anti-gayism, then he has the right to talk

Anyone not happy with your pseudo-feminism should start a campaign on twitter about it or open a twitter handle for you.

Marriage = been kept by men

Or marriage for feminists is different from marriage for anti-feminists?

All anti-feminists work and support their husbands... all feminists sit at home and are kept by their husbands

Bunch of jokers

An2elect2:


I don't criticise men. I love them too much, to sit all day cherry picking their faults. What i detest, and most women in this country will agree with me, is the constant berating of Nigerian women, who i see as one of the most 'forgiving' and loving women in this messed up world. They are still holding on to traditions even more than their male counterparts. (I only discovered this not long ago) I may not be qualified for a 'good' man but i know many Nigerian women that 'deserve' better than what they re getting here.

so you know...

cococandy:


I think GEJ tried to do something like that. The bill he recently passed that makes it illegal for one to abandon their kids. All the masses need is enlightenment and knowledge of their rights to let that part of the constitution fight for them.

If not some men will keep abandoning their babies without consequences and those mothers will keep suffering as single moms or dump the babies in gutters and walk away.

When you say enforce child support laws, some people will say feminists want to ruin the world

And the woman that abandons are child and elopes with a lover...?! that's the problem with you feminist... your policies are all the time shit...

iPopAlomo:


And the woman that abandons are child and ropes with a lover...?! that's the problem with you feminist... your policies are all the time shit...

the law is not gender specific.

So anyone can be found guilty under it.

Aystarz:


That one go hard ooo as many Nlander guys don't see that francistony guy as a Real Gee; to many here, he is but another 'womanwrappering' jerk.
...gonna be really really hard .

She wrote, more guys not more Nairaland guys.

Who cares about what monikers think about me?

tellwisdom:
98.9% of gurls in Nigeria are unromantic, poor, money hungry, dirty and hoes in disguise

.unromantic?teach them romance. Poor? Give them money "mister rich man" .Money hungry? Give them jobs mister "jobberman". Dirty? Show them how to be clean mister "neatest guy". Hoes? Why not stop patronizing them. I pity whoever marries you...you hateful human being.

misssclassy:





Are you people for real? For goodness sakes this is all for fun. Are you not on twitter? Don't you see that all this is just for humor sakes?

Don't you understand how such hash tags work? Everything is always aimed at humor although mostly to drive a point, but it is still all just for fun.
That's why you see exaggerations of all kind.

Must you guys always be too serious about everything?

there was no emoticon to depict the humour or sarcasm in your post,so ....It's not my fault ✘

#BeingfemaleinNigeria you learn to live your lives by others' rules and then blame them for your choice.

Being a Nigerian woman no be play ooooo.....we really go thru a whole Lotta shits

proxillin:
[size=16pt]Women always complaining.

They tell you not to have multiple sexual, u said they are unfair. Oya na...get pregnant for 3 daddies.LOL..and tell your kid, "You have 3 daddies"...Oloshissssss


Feminisim my foot. Your body is not cut out to do certain things. Its not that they are limiting you, they are caring for you and the society.

You went out naked and a guy raped you. Will you feel comfortable if a guy dress the same way you did and come and sit with you.

You will start calling men different name, they are ashawo, they are gay...How can a guy reveal his dck publicly. Any rule that binds a guy should bind a lady. Why are ladies looking for exception?

In music videos, you see a guy kitting up, you see the girls in pants. Can't you keep your unclothedness for yourself? Must you appear naked?

I seriously dont encourage rapist. If you are a rapist, you lack self-control.

When its come to service/benefits, you will hear ladies first "Why Ladies first?", are they different humans?

They tell you to marry at early age is not for the benefit of your man, its for your own good. Female Menopause starts from age 30.

They asked you to marry at age 25, you say they are mounting pressure on you. Societal pressure..blahblah. Oya na...be barren...I trust mr. Husband, he go nack one young babe pregnancy outside. And come and cry about how men are dogs.

At your tender age, you want to date old men. A girl of 16 years dating a man of 45 years old.

Do we guys have access to that? Do women of age 45 date young boys of age 20? We dont enjoy this benefit!

Yet, you have not seen guys crying public about the maginalization. Feminism my foot...fck feminism[/size]

Taking them (feminists) to the cleaners, this should be tagged!