Good day to all of you:

I've been reading over a lot of these forum posts and they seem to help others, so I was hoping the same could happen for me. I need your help!

Both my boyfriend and I are American, but we are clearly from two different cultures. I'm a Stolen African and Mexican woman, so if of course, I only know my family history dating back to slavery in America + Mexico's independence. He, however, is Nigerian from Edo State and lived there when he was younger.

This man has told me that he dates with the intent to marry. I believe his actions match his words, because in the three months we've been dating, I had major surgery and he stuck by me even though he has two jobs.

I am finding Nigerian people have their customs and traditions, and have been crying over YouTube videos of traditional weddings. I think it is so beautiful the retention your people have for culture and tradition.

But I need more information and possibly advice on how to deal with his family I will meet soon. I've met all his friends and the two cousins he lives with. But I haven't met his family because there is something I have to clear up in my personal life before he presents me.

He told me that his parents will love me, but that he is afraid of how his sister (who two years younger than him) and I will get along.

He is worried that she will be rude to me and grill me about my age, my previous martial status, and the fact I haven't finished my bachelor's... although neither has he.

I've seen posts that say "just be respectful even if the family is cold" but how far should I or should I not go?

Ayam lost 4 words

Well, just be yourself. Be simple, respectful and direct and don't do anything to overly impress. Fortunately for you it doesn't matter so much even if his sister does not like you as she wouldn't be living with you both. All that matters is that he loves you. He does right?

I'm absolutely sure this man wants to marry me yes

nicerod:
Ayam lost 4 words

What's wrong? Did I say something inappropriate?

Tell him to teach you bow they greet older people in his home town for a start.

When you meet them, first thing is to greet them in the traditional way, it is the first step to your acceptance by the family. If need be, help with domestic chores and be socially free with the members of his family.

BlackGirlLost:
Good day to all of you:

I've been reading over a lot of these forum posts and they seem to help others, so I was hoping the same could happen for me. I need your help!

Both my boyfriend and I are American, but we are clearly from two different cultures. I'm a Stolen African and Mexican woman, so if of course, I only know my family history dating back to slavery in America + Mexico's independence. He, however, is Nigerian from Edo State and lived there when he was younger.

This man has told me that he dates with the intent to marry. I believe his actions match his words, because in the three months we've been dating, I had major surgery and he stuck by me even though he has two jobs.

I am finding Nigerian people have their customs and traditions, and have been crying over YouTube videos of traditional weddings. I think it is so beautiful the retention your people have for culture and tradition.

But I need more information and possibly advice on how to deal with his family I will meet soon. I've met all his friends and the two cousins he lives with. But I haven't met his family because there is something I have to clear up in my personal life before he presents me.

He told me that his parents will love me, but that he is afraid of how his sister (who two years younger than him) and I will get along.

He is worried that she will be rude to me and grill me about my age, my previous martial status, and the fact I haven't finished my bachelor's... although neither has he.

I've seen posts that say "just be respectful even if the family is cold" but how far should I or should I not go?

I am from Edo state, I don't think you will have any problem with his family. Edo people are generally receptive towards strangers(white inclusive). We are used to marrying white ladies.The only thing you should investigate, is if he is not already married here in Nigeria. Most Edo guys who are married to white ladies oversea have wives here.

BlackGirlLost:


What's wrong? Did I say something inappropriate?

i dnt knw wot 2 say dats y

Hmmmmmmmm. Don't tolerate cold inlaws. They are worse to deal with. There's this Yoruba proverb that says, "aya buburu da ju ano buburu lo". Which means having a bad wife is better than bad inlaws.

Jorussia:
I am from Edo state, I don't think you will have any problem with his family. Edo people are generally receptive towards strangers(white inclusive). We are used to marrying white ladies.The only thing you should investigate, is if he is not already married here in Nigeria. Most Edo guys who are married to white ladies oversea have wives here.

Why do Edo men like white ladies so? It is a trend or thing to do? Just curious.

BlackGirlLost:
Good day to all of you:

I've been reading over a lot of these forum posts and they seem to help others, so I was hoping the same could happen for me. I need your help!

Both my boyfriend and I are American, but we are clearly from two different cultures. I'm a Stolen African and Mexican woman, so if of course, I only know my family history dating back to slavery in America + Mexico's independence. He, however, is Nigerian from Edo State and lived there when he was younger.

This man has told me that he dates with the intent to marry. I believe his actions match his words, because in the three months we've been dating, I had major surgery and he stuck by me even though he has two jobs.

I am finding Nigerian people have their customs and traditions, and have been crying over YouTube videos of traditional weddings. I think it is so beautiful the retention your people have for culture and tradition.

But I need more information and possibly advice on how to deal with his family I will meet soon. I've met all his friends and the two cousins he lives with. But I haven't met his family because there is something I have to clear up in my personal life before he presents me.

He told me that his parents will love me, but that he is afraid of how his sister (who two years younger than him) and I will get along.

He is worried that she will be rude to me and grill me about my age, my previous martial status, and the fact I haven't finished my bachelor's... although neither has he.

I've seen posts that say "just be respectful even if the family is cold" but how far should I or should I not go?

All u raised now are no issues!
He is trying to discourage u from seeing his people!Period!
Maybe he is hiding something!

Xtristolink:

All u raised now are no issues!
He is trying to discourage u from seeing his people!Period!
Maybe he is hiding something!

Well I'm not discouraged. I think it's the truth, his cousins share the same sentiment about the sisters

BlackGirlLost:


Well I'm not discouraged. I think it's the truth, his cousins share the same sentiment about the sisters

How long is the rel? do your underground work very well! before long u will understand why he doesn't want u to see his people!

Xtristolink:

How long is the rel? do your underground work very well! before long u will understand why he doesn't want u to see his people!

This August we'll be dating for 4 months. But I just finished taking care of my obligation last Monday, so I'm just going to take the advice that I've been given and give him time to work this out

BlackGirlLost:


This August we'll be dating for 4 months. But I just finished taking care of my obligation last Monday, so I'm just going to take the advice that I've been given and give him time to work this out

Everyman will be so proud and willing to show off his lady to his people.Once he starts hesitating, then that's a warning sign!
It means danger!

Xtristolink:


Everyman will be so proud and willing to show off his lady to his people.Once he starts hesitating, then that's a warning sign!
It means danger!

Girl who you telling... we will see what is the meaning behind all of this

BlackGirlLost:


Girl who you telling... we will see what is the meaning behind all of this

I'm a guy

Xtristolink:

I'm a guy

sorry

BlackGirlLost:


sorry

. Sorry bt hw old r u? R u older dan him or d oda way round??

mekzyjoe:
. Sorry bt hw old r u? R u older dan him or d oda way round??

He's 28 I'm 31

BlackGirlLost:


He's 28 I'm 31

. Dats nice....big AUNTY tinz...its gonna b well,,jst chill

mekzyjoe:
. Dats nice....big AUNTY tinz...its gonna b well,,jst chill

OK thank you all again

BlackGirlLost:


He's 28 I'm 31

It may likely not work out between the both of you........Nigerian factor

nnamdibig:


It may likely not work out between the both of you........Nigerian factor

Thank you

if you 31 and he's younger just forget it... A typical Nigerian family won't accept such.. They will be concerned about your respect for him and you not looking too old for him... Telling them you were married before is also another draw back because they will think you will leave the guy just the way you left your ex... It's complicated but prepare your mind for the worst.. Good luck

MrsChima:


Why do Edo men like white ladies so? It is a trend or thing to do? Just curious.

Chima! Tell me more about these white women?

BlackGirlLost:


Chima! Tell me more about these white women?

ask uncle Ishiomhole