Since open, stage managed proposals with ready cameras fit for Instagram and twitter papparazzi seems to be the order of the day, with the latest, about to be trendy show in which a lady knees on one leg and propose to a man, I hereby put an open invitation to you ladies, who will knee on one leg and propose to me?

Lagos no 1 Fine boy is recruiting*winks

Qualifications:

1.A working brain, not some Kardashian faced,chicken brain ‘hotties’, mba

2.All links to your social media pages, if I see that you’re among those who wake up 6am, apply some foundations and mascara, snap a selfie and post on IG with the tag “I woke up like this”, I will not only shred your application letter, I will put you on eternal black list, that’s fraud men!

Besides, I’d like to see how you relate, type or chat too

If you use ‘Tew’ for ‘tell’, ‘aii’ for ‘alright’, ‘I’ for ‘hi’, or you post ‘HBD,LLNP,GGMUB’ on people’s wall as birthday greetings, please don’t apply, your laziness is the reason Nigeria’s economy isn’t growing

3. A degree from either Oxford, Harvard, Cambridge or FUTA, Yes, FUTA is at per with those trio *Proudly Futarian

4. Five pictures of you taken in your most natural state, your face without make up (Not even medicated powder), no foundations, no Mary kay (Since I don’t use Joseph Tay too, fair?), your legs (Left and right taken separately,just checking to avoid situations whereby I’ll be mistaking my Bae’s legs for the Igbomina yam specie).
The fourth pix should show you in full while the last one shows your face alone (Second time? Yes, I don’t wanna invite a Kim-K for the screening and end up having a Whoopie Goldberg staring at me, hence the emphasis on face)

5. Original copies of your birth certificate (No affidavit please, that’s how my friend ended up marrying an ancestor older than the aunty who taught us in Primary school then, all because she claimed 22, with some nice face-designs, the next morning after wedding, when the ‘foundations were destroyed, the righteous did something, he wailed aloud like someone who lost election after selling his Father’s only house)

6. Catering school certification, with emphasis on your skills at using locust beans, I don’t want some Ajinomoto experts, if you’re only good at making noodles, please don’t apply

7. You’ll do a seminar presentation on “The place of the Nigerian Youth in Africa development, politics and related issues”, I just want to be sure you’re not a Telemundo and African magic addict, with zero knowledge on key national issues, imagine how embarrassed I’ll be if my friends mention Aminu Tambuwal and you ask if he’s an Hausa actor, tufia!

8. A detailed statement of your career goals, with emphasis on financial self-dependence, I hope you know I’m not the Federal government, you shouldn’t expect me to foot all your bills while you sit at home all day gossiping

If you meet these criteria, upload your cv on this page, LOL
http://www.samueliyanu.

*Yawn*

salary for your supposed wife should start from 2M.

I cant believe i read this shit!

Very funny lol. and the number two is the funniest. Nice write-up op.

Daughterzion:
I cant believe i read this shit!

Just for fun my dear. Are searching for fine boy? Or what are expecting to see, that you are not seeing?

Ur dp

greatestman:
[b][/b]
Just for fun my dear. Are searching for fine boy? Or what are expecting to see, that you are not seeing?

Daughterzion:
Ur dp

I think the link is attached the last time I checked this thread.

Daughterzion:
I cant believe i read this shit!

You read to check if you met the requirements?

chudidonas:

You read to check if you met the requirements?

lolz. No oo. But you know curiosity kill the cat

Lol.