Teacher: How old is your father?
Kid: He is 6 years.
Teacher: What? How is this possible?
Kid: He became father only when I was
born.
Logic!! Children Are Quick and Always Speak
Their Minds
.
.
.

_______________________________
.
.
.
TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find
North America .
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class,
who
discovered America ?
CLASS: Maria.
.
.
.

_______________________________
TEACHER: John, why are you doing
your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You
told me to do it without
using the tables.
.
.
.
_______________________________
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell
'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L' TEACHER: No,
that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you
asked me how I spell it.
(I Love this child)
.
.
.
_______________________________
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula
for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
.
.
.

_______________________________
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we
have today that we didn't
have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
.
.
.

_______________________________
TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get
so dirty? GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the
ground than you are.
.
.
.

_______________________________
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence
starting with ' I. '
MILLIE: I is... TEACHER: No, Millie...... always
say, 'I
am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter
of the alphabet'
.
.
.
.

_______________________________
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped
down his father's cherry tree,
but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do
you know why his father didn't
punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the
axe in his hand...... ____________________________
.
.
.
TEACHER: Now, Simon , tell me frankly,
do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom
is a good cook.
______________________________
.
.
.

TEACHER: Clyde ,
your composition on
'My Dog' is exactly the same as your
brother's.. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No sir, It's the same dog.
(I want to adopt this kid!!!)
____________________________
.
.
.

TEACHER: Harold,
what do you call a
person who keeps on talking when
people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher
.
.
.
Lalasticalala

A Chinese walks into a bar in America late one night and he saw Steven Spielberg. As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph. Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says, "You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Habour, get outta here." The astonished Chinese man replied, "It was not the Chinese who bombed your Pearl Harbour, it was the Japanese ". "Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, you're all the same ," replied Spielberg. In return, the Chinese gives Spielberg a slap and says, "You sank the Titanic, my forefathers were on that ship." Shocked, Spielberg replies, "It was the iceberg that sank the ship, not me." The Chinese replies, "Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg, you're all the same."

hahaha. Cool beans

ABEG WHO GET SENSE PASS? PASTOR OR PAPA? When I was a kid, my dad bought a new car and drove us to church one Sunday. It was a prophetic service and our pastor was being used by God that day to deliver people from poverty. Suddenly, our pastor looked at my dad and said: "Mr Okonkwo, God is set to bless you." My mum jumped up and shouted excitedly; "Amen!!!" My dad was excited too. The pastor then came closer, placed his hand on my dad's head and prayed for him. As our pastor turned to climb the altar, the spirit of God told him something. He stopped, looked at my dad and said: "Mr Okonkwo, did you buy a new car last week?" "Yes sir," my dad responded with much surprise on his face. Then our pastor said: "God said I should tell you to sow your CAR KEY into my life." I was shocked that my dad did not argue with the pastor, he just put his hand in his pocket, brought out the car key and gave to our pastor. "Chai,,,, Chineeekeeee...," I thought within me, the joy accompanying owning a car evaporating from my mind! After about five minutes, my dad stood up, went outside the church, he didn't even wait till the end of the service. I could see him taking Okada going home. "He must be very worried," I reasoned in utter fear and confusion. After a while he returned to church with the SPARE KEY of his car and drove the car back home. I was so stunned at what I was seeing. So, when I asked him why he acted that way he said: "Son, use your brain, the pastor asked for the KEY and NOT the CAR." Ohhh... Na true... "Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our minds!" ~ Bob Marley