Phema:


Now, that is common sense.

Now leading back to your question, wouldn't she be disobeying God?

freecocoa:
Now leading back to your question, wouldn't she be disobeying God?

Serious disobedience noni.

There is no condition attached to a woman being submissive. No matter how we want to look at it.

Phema:


Now, that is common sense.

Lol. People regardless of what they say can't practice true submission. Just like there are many things in the bible you can't do literally the way they are commanded.



How's our little prince?

cococandy:
The two are meant to work hand in hand.

No human except one with a severely destroyed sense of self can submit to a disrespectful spouse.

This is just the pure truth.

freecocoa:
Freshvine we can disagree without throwing insults, especially as there is absolutely nothing stupiid about phema's question.

Madam Freecocoa, show me where I insulted phema in my post?

I never told her she is stupidd. I address her questions objectively with an adjective phrase "stupid question" which literally means inane, not making sense, Inappropriate, undecidely, etc

Didn't you read where I commended her for her brilliant expository write ups but guess you put a blind eye to it?

Do not stir up hate please. It's unlady like

cococandy:


Lol. People regardless of what they say can't practice true submission. Just like there are many things in the bible you can't do literally the way they are commanded.

How's our little prince?

But eeerrrmmm, that is what God expects from us nah.


He's very well. You and yours?

freecocoa:
Now leading back to your question, wouldn't she be disobeying God?

The same way my husband would be disobeying god if he doesn't honor me. If he does honor me, we wouldn't have reason to be at odds because I'll have a place of honor in my home and not the place of an inferior partner.

Theres a reason why both parties have to keep their part of the commandments.

People need to focus some more on what husbands are commanded to do. Wives have heard theirs over and over it has become so stale.

Phema:


But eeerrrmmm, that is what God expects from us nah.


He's very well. You and yours?

we are fine.

freecocoa:
I do understand your angle but I don't agree that's what submission means according to the bible and you do have to be unequal to submit but anyways, nice advice.

lol
The Biblical submission doesnt mean being unequal. Remember the same Bible regards marriage as a legal union where two separate individuals(male&female) become one indivisible body.
How then can there be inequality after the couple have become one body?

As someone said earlier, each spouse has a special role to play that is neither greater/better nor less important than that of the other spouse. They are to work as a team, and not as rivals or competitors (just as the head cannot rival the hand, same way the neck cannot be competing with the stomach).

Sorry for barging in anyways since the O.P clearly pointed out that this thread is for feminists only.

Chidoks:


You've just hit the hammer on the head! The moment you let the man know he's the boss, hmnnnnn.you will be in control but he won't even know.nothing appeals to a man like meekness and respect.this is the ticket to stress free marriage

I very much agree with you except the 'the man being the boss thingy'.

Biblically, being the Head does not automatically translate to being 'the boss' as you put it.

Remember Jesus Himself explained that the greatest among you should be the servant of all.
Hence, being the Head is about being the servant of all, because as the head of your family, you are expected to make lots of sacrifices for your family(the same way Christ Jesus served the church and gave His life for her - the supreme sacrifice).

Therefore, being the boss is totally out of the question. Mutual respect is what is required.

Richiy:


But many ladies don't know this. In their bid to be "equal" and not sidelined, they get it wrong. Respect a man and he will get the whole world for you.

Sorry but this opinion of yours is more cultural than biblical.


Once again, apologies to the O.P for barging into her feminazi thread.

Phema:


Serious disobedience noni.

There is no condition attached to a woman being submissive. No matter how we want to look at it.

And this just the plain truth.

I think people should stop preaching submission in marriage, it's not even like the woman supposed to submit won't love her husband, just encourage them to love and respect each other and everyone will be fine.

shaybebaby:
Don't know why but everytime I see that word "submission", my brain refuses to process it. It is does not equate to love when it is demanded.

Also, trying to ascribe a different meaning to it biblically wont work because we all know that according to the times when those texts were written, it was a much more patriarichal society where women were seen as being less to men.

Hence freecocoa is correct in the dynamics required for submission to take place..superior (men) and inferior ( women) according to the book.
A sense of self worth is required in a healthy partnership, submission negates that. How can you reject poo if it thrown at you and submit at the same time?

It's always best to go by the standard definitions of things. I don't buy all these different meaning because it gives rise to a situation bad people can twist it to suit them as evident in our society today.

I agree

limamintruth:


lol
The Biblical submission doesnt mean being unequal. Remember the same Bible regards marriage as a legal union where two separate individuals(male&female) become one indivisible body.
How then can there be inequality after the couple have become one body?

As someone said earlier, each spouse has a special role to play that is neither greater/better nor less important than that of the other spouse. They are to work as a team, and not as rivals or competitors (just as the head cannot rival the hand, same way the neck cannot be competing with the stomach).

Sorry for barging in anyways since the O.P clearly pointed out that this thread is for feminists only.




I very much agree with you except the 'the man being the boss thingy'.

Biblically, being the Head does not automatically translate to being 'the boss' as you put it.

Remember Jesus Himself explained that the greatest among you should be the servant of all.
Hence, being the Head is about being the servant of all, because as the head of your family, you are expected to make lots of sacrifices for your family(the same way Christ Jesus served the church and gave His life for her - the supreme sacrifice).

Therefore, being the boss is totally out of the question. Mutual respect is what is required.




Sorry but this opinion of yours is more cultural than biblical.


Once again, apologies to the O.P for barging into her feminazi thread.

A wise woman and a good woman would submit to her husband in all things.
If what the man wants is a sin agains God then she is bound to obey the will of God. I think we shouldn't really be asking that because the answer is obvious.
Submitting to your husband does not come natural to many women you really have to work at it over and over again but with time if you really try you can achieve this.
You even learn to be proud of yourself for having that quality because it really is the foundation of a good home and family.
As the bible says .. all is vanity but true love is not boastful or proud.
It is so much easier and humorous when a woman submits to her husband than when she is in constant power struggle with the man.
Some people argue that men could abuse submissiveness. But men also abuse women who are not submissive.
The most important thing is at the end of the day you know you gave your best, you did it right in the eyes of God and of man.
The man is the head of the home and the woman cannot be equal to the man. Even if you are superior to him by virtue of education or any other reason. It is your duty to relinquish that superiority and place yourself under him. That is true love and that is one of the most relevant qualities of a good wife.

Phema:


As stupiid as it was, your stupiid illustration did it no good. Where in the bible did it say children should submit to their parents in everything?

It was a reverse psychology question. Don't get the context of my expository wrong with emotional impression. Don't give in to discordant templates trying to stir unhealthy rivalry because of their inordinate social believes.

freecocoa:
This submission nonsense is one of the reasons I can't live by the rules of the bible, there's no way I'm submitting to any man in the name of marriage, compromise is a sure thing in life and I am yet to meet anyone who is quicker in putting someone else's feelings into consideration than myself, so why then do I need to lose my will just to make a man happy?

The truth of the matter is that, as a christian woman, you can't be a feminist at the same time, because feminism doesn't agree with the bible.

This is why I advise single ladies to look before they leap. First of all, get it right by marrying the right man. This issue of submission will not even come up if you marry a good man. You will just naturally want to please him because you know he loves you and will go to a great length to make you happy.

When a man makes his home his sanctuary and his family, his priority, submitting to him will be easier. Both of you will want to make each other happy and things will just naturally flow.

cococandy:


The same way my husband would be disobeying god if he doesn't honor me. If he does honor me, we wouldn't have reason to be at odds because I'll have a place of honor in my home and not the place of an inferior partner.

Theres a reason why both parties have to keep their part of the commandments.

People need to focus some more on what husbands are commanded to do. Wives have heard theirs over and over it has become so stale.

The point remains, what if he fails in his part? Does that mean you should fail too?

Phema:


This is why I advise single ladies to look before they leap. First of all, get it right by marrying the right man. This issue of submission will not even come up if you marry a good man. You will just naturally want to please him because you know he loves you and will go to a great length to make you happy.

When a man makes his home his sanctuary and his family, his priority, submitting to him will be easier. Both of you will want to make each other happy and things will just naturally flow.

You are right, although the way I see it, there won't be room for submitting in my marriage, the point being that, I believe a man who loves you, will not want you to give into his wish without considering if it okay with you or not, which is what submission is all about.

I still strongly believe, the right word is compromise.

freshvine:
It was a reverse psychology question. Don't get the context of my expository wrong with emotional impression. Don't give in to discordant templates trying to stir unhealthy rivalry because of their inordinate social believes.

All this your English dey make me woozy ooo. Ah ah, soffery abeg.

The 'stupiid' thingy just didn't come across as polite. It's all good.

Phema:
Nice thread. But again, you are not defining submission in marriage according to the Bible.

The Bible says "wives submit to your husbands in all things". This means that you MUST do your husband's bidding ALWAYS, even when it really doesn't make sense.

And no. A husband and wife are not equal, biblically. You donot submit "in all things" to someone you are equal to. The way I see it, one is either a christian who lives by the Bible or an athiest/non practising christian who lives by common sense. No middle grounds. A real christian woman must submit to her husband always, hence not equal to him.

Now, my question is; what if my husband wants me to do something that is obviously a sin? At what point does one say no to submission without going against God's word?

From the christain view which you are looking at submission, it related it to a man being a true practising christain. If the act that brought the non submission is not christlike including treating the woman unjustly (certainly not christlike), then non submission is not totally out of place. Though not spelt out to the letter, it is same as children obey your parents in the lord otherwise people will force their children to obey them in all things because the bible said so. To confirm that it is meant for men that are truely christlike, it went further to tell the man to love like christ. The question therefore is, has the man screaming submission from his woman loved or is willing to love like christ? Does he even know what it means to love like christ? Does he know christ to start with? Some of the people screaming the "christain" submission as you put it, only go to church on new year's eve, only know that portion of the bible because their fellows said it is in the good book, are certified or uncertified atheist. Do you know that there's a reward/motivation for submission?

Firstly, submission is not forced, it is of freewill as in man to God. Secondly total submission can only be to God regardless of the situation because only him is perfect. Inspite of this, there is non righteous that totally submit at all times to a perfect God let alone to an imperfect man, one can only strive to be perfect.

As i hinted before, even God rewards those who submit to him by lifting them up as he said in Peters or motivates you to submit by lifting you up to acknowledge that it is grace that made it and thus humble yourself, where you ungreatfully does not recognises his grace, he can decide to bring you down. In same vein, the man is told to love his wife like christ love the church as the woman's return for submitting. It is only an ungreatful woman that will not submit to a loving man. In my Pov, it is actually difficult to love like christ than to submit. If many men give themselves to understanding aside doing the christ type of love, they will be too overwhelmed to scream submission because then they will see the bigger log is in their eyes.

Treating your fellow human unjustly is a sin before God. Basically if the act is not just or is a sin before God then the woman can decide not to submit.

freecocoa:
The point remains, what if he fails in his part? Does that mean you should fail too?

Invariably.

I can't relate well with someone who disrespects me much less submit to him.

God knows that is how he made me. He even saw it before I got married. The very nature he created me to have won't allow me to lie down and take humiliation without question.

He will understand

babygirlfl:


It's always best to go by the standard definitions of things. I don't buy all these different meaning because it gives rise to a situation bad people can twist it to suit them as evident in our society today.

Exactly.

limamintruth:


lol
The Biblical submission doesnt mean being unequal. Remember the same Bible regards marriage as a legal union where two separate individuals(male&female) become one indivisible body.
How then can there be inequality after the couple have become one body?

As someone said earlier, each spouse has a special role to play that is neither greater/better nor less important than that of the other spouse. They are to work as a team, and not as rivals or competitors (just as the head cannot rival the hand, same way the neck cannot be competing with the stomach).

Sorry for barging in anyways since the O.P clearly pointed out that this thread is for feminists only.




I very much agree with you except the 'the man being the boss thingy'.

Biblically, being the Head does not automatically translate to being 'the boss' as you put it.

Remember Jesus Himself explained that the greatest among you should be the servant of all.
Hence, being the Head is about being the servant of all, because as the head of your family, you are expected to make lots of sacrifices for your family(the same way Christ Jesus served the church and gave His life for her - the supreme sacrifice).

Therefore, being the boss is totally out of the question. Mutual respect is what is required.




Sorry but this opinion of yours is more cultural than biblical.


Once again, apologies to the O.P for barging into her feminazi thread.

The bible is known to speak from both sides of the mouth, so....

No offence to anyone.

@GHoJes

Nice perspective.

The question remains; is a woman's unsubmissiveness pardonable by God if her husband does not love her as God commanded, biblically? Must there be an incentive before a woman wholeheartedly submits to her husband?

Remember we are looking at this from God's standards.

freecocoa:
The bible is known to speak from both sides of the mouth, so....

No offence to anyone.

Get out of my head!

freecocoa:
The bible is known to speak from both sides of the mouth, so....

No offence to anyone.

None taken.

The Christians here will understand better what I'm talking about.

mutter:
A wise woman and a good woman would submit to her husband in all things.
If what the man wants is a sin agains God then she is bound to obey the will of God. I think we shouldn't really be asking that because the answer is obvious.
Submitting to your husband does not come natural to many women you really have to work at it over and over again but with time if you really try you can achieve this.
You even learn to be proud of yourself for having that quality because it really is the foundation of a good home and family.
As the bible says .. all is vanity but true love is not boastful or proud.
It is so much easier and humorous when a woman submits to her husband than when she is in constant power struggle with the man.
Some people argue that men could abuse submissiveness. But men also abuse women who are not submissive.
The most important thing is at the end of the day you know you gave your best, you did it right in the eyes of God and of man.
The man is the head of the home and the woman cannot be equal to the man. Even if you are superior to him by virtue of education or any other reason. It is your duty to relinquish that superiority and place yourself under him. That is true love and that is one of the most relevant qualities of a good wife.

Now, this is a true christian woman speaking writing.

cococandy:


Invariably.

I can't relate well with someone who disrespects me much less submit to him.

God knows that is how he made me. He even saw it before I got married. The very nature he created me to have won't allow me to lie down and take humiliation without question.

He will understand

Lol, hell fire go be your case o, coco repent.

Phema:


Get out of my head!

Lol.

freecocoa:
The bible is known to speak from both sides of the mouth, so....

No offence to anyone.

With all respect to all my bible believing friends and with no offence intended from me too, I totally agree with this.

limamintruth:



None taken.

The Christians here will understand better what I'm talking about.

Okay.

freecocoa:
Okay.

Hallelujah cocoa.

People are beginning to see the bible for what it is.
It's a new dawn.

BABE3:


Hallelujah cocoa.

People are beginning to see the bible for what it is.
It's a new dawn.

Praise my sister.

It really is.