I wonder how many times this same write up will make front page.

Keep recycling same stories and changing few sentences.

This thread breaks Rule 14.

Sick and tired of it's holier than thou message.

https://www.nairaland.com/516057/open-letter-middle-class-lagos-parents#6780167

The link above shows it was as early as 2010.

https://www.nairaland.com/700084/parents-buy-into#8599178. Same story in 2011.

https://www.nairaland.com/895335/which-way-forward-nigeria-must#10416776 This was 2012

https://www.nairaland.com/1467891/parents#18657664 2013

https://www.nairaland.com/1912919/which-way-nigeria-must-read#26480662 2014

and here it is again in 2015.

Well, I flew economy class five years ago to the UK for my studies, there goes your logic!

You should learn not to generalise when you write. Use of English 101, that is if you took the class.

Mbkite:
What a piece

, this is a mind blowing enlightenment for parents that are consume with greed and selfishness. that circle have to be broken for Nigeria to move on. The future is here and it is now.

[size=8pt][/size][b][/b][b][/b]my children. Will not suffer what I suffered. My suffering of No GooD FooD. No GooD Uniform. No GooD SchooL. No GooD House To Live In. No GooD Modern EquipMent. No GooD n SounD Bedrock DaTZ I MEANT








































































Not the oda way round



















Dey will get d best of bedrock n foundation

The Nigerian rich man takes after the American rich man; they're the ones who spoil their kids rotten...

The message is more in-depth than the surface meaning some folks on here are giving it.

The truth is that, it all depends and very relative. The analogy about the queen of England and Kate Middleton does not quite work. Please go to Beverly Hills in California or Vancouver in Canada and see wealthy children display wealth. The reality is that, it depends on how wealthy you turn to be. If you are top 1% then your kids do not have to work at McDonalds to understand money. And if they eventually do not get upright quickly you can influence a lot of things in their favour. If you are a struggling middleclass like most of us will end up, then you have to let them understand how competitive the world has become and largely the survival of the smartest.

I believe in social and volunteer work but the perversion behind is so much about employers looking for in on your resume. Most white people do it to look good. Of all my school mates and colleagues at work, most of them didn't enjoy volunteer but just a means to look good on resume. I will not encourage my kids to work at McDonalds but teach them at the very early stage to be competitive and entrepreneurial.

If you are wealthy, you can kids can be raised anyhow you want. Top 1% will almost always dominate the rest of the population for generations to come.

This post take an extremist position on parents securing the
future of their children.
There are some parents who went to school barefooted and there
are those who hawked wares for decade before having a breakthrough;
does that mean the children have to experience these hardships in
order to be "men/women".
If such parents decide to sponsor their wards to attend Harvard some will
still criticize them for "caring too much".

This life consists of ladders and one doesn't have to start from the
bottom to become successful , use whatever ladder you have!

Everything needs balance.

quest003:
this write up only applies to parents who overindulge their kids, the syndrome likewise keeps gents and ladies on their toe to work hard in order to provide an enabling environment and better life for their offsprings.

my thoughts...

Was this piece not here over a year ago? I have certainly read it somewhere. Nice though.

Biliamin:
LETTER TO NIGERIAN PARENTS written by Adeyinka Temitope

I wish to start by adding the benefit of my time as a student and then resident in the UK. Living in Abuja now.

The first thing that I discovered about UK-born, white, English undergraduates was that all of them did holiday or weekend job to support themselves – including the children of millionaires amongst them. It is the norm over there – regardless of how wealthy their parents are. And I soon discovered that virtually all other foreign students did the same – except status – conscious Nigerians.

I also watched Richard Branson (owner of Virgin Airline) speaking on the Biography Channel. To my amazement, he said that his young children travel in the economy class – even when the parents (he and his wife) are in upper class. Richard Branson is a billionaire in Pound sterling. A quick survey would show you that only children from Nigeria fly business or upper class to commence their studies in the UK. No other foreign students do this. There is no aircraft attached to the office of the Prime Minister in the UK. He travels on BA. And the same goes for the Royals. The Queen does not have an aircraft for her exclusive use.

These practices simply become the culture which the next generation carries forward. Have you seen the car that Kate Middleton (the wife of Prince William) drives? VW Golf or something close to it. But there’s one core difference between them and us (generally speaking), they (even the billionaires among them) work for their money, most of us steal ours
If we want our children to bring about the desired change we have been praying for on behalf of our dear country, then please, please let’s begin now and teach them to work hard so they can stand alone and most importantly be content and not having to “steal” which seems to be the norm these days.

We have Nigerian Children who have never worked for 5 minutes in their lives insisting on flying “only” first or business class and using the latest cars fully paid for by their “loving“ parents.

I often get calls from anxious parents” my son graduated 2 years ago and is still looking for a job, can you please assist!”

“Oh really! So where exactly is “THIS CHILD?” is my usual question. “Why are you the one making this call dad/mum?"

I am yet to get a satisfactory answer, but between you and i, chances are that the big boy is cruising around Abuja with a babe dressed to the nines, in his dad’s sparkling new SUV with enough “pocket money” to put your salary to shame. It is not at all strange to hear a 28 year old who has NEVER worked for a day in his or her life in Nigeria but “earns” a six figure “salary” from parents for doing absolutely nothing.

I see them in my office once in a while, 26 years old with absolutely no skill to sell apart from a shiny CV, written by his dad’s secretary in the office. Of course, he has a driver at his beck and call and he is driven to the job interview. We have a fairly decent conversation and we get to the inevitable question- so, what salary are you looking to earn? Answer comes straight out – N250,000.00.

I ask if that is per month or per annum.

“Of course, it is per month”

“Oh, why do you think you should be earning that much on your first job?”

“Well, because my current pocket money is N200,000.00 and I feel any employer should be able to pay me more than my parents.”

No wonder corruption continues to thrive. We have a society of young people who have been brought up to expect something for nothing, as if it were a birthright.

Even though the examples I have given above are from parents of considerable affluence, similar patterns can be observed from Abeokuta to Adamawa.

Wake up mum! Wake up dad! This syndrome – “my children will not suffer what I suffered" is destroying your tomorrow. You are practically loving your child to death.

I learnt the children of a former Nigeria Head of State with all the stolen (billions) monies in their custody, still go about with security escort as wrecks. They are on drugs, several time because of the drug, they collapse in public places. The escort will quickly pack them and off they go. What a life! No one wants to marry them.

Henry Ford said “hard work does not kill.” We are getting everything wrong in Nigeria now, including family setting. It is time to prepare your children for tomorrow, the way the world is going, only those that are rugged, hard working and smart working that will survive. How will your ward fare?

Please forward this to all the parents you know and love. We must begin to save our young children from unintended consequences of "too much love" and weak parenting. It is the only way we can build a strong and decent Nigeria.

Best topic ave seen today
Ur head dey der
Nice write op hope they learn sha

missdebs:
mo fe lowo ju daddy mi ooo, only in nigeria would u see parents using java phones and dier kids using iphone 6.

That's a sign of good living. ....

CC:
You made som much point here. What a piece to cool off 2nite. God bless you. #TeamThinkForMe

avaa:
Truth be told, we prefer to celebrate mediocrity and laziness in this part of the world. A nation that fails to recognize, groom and encourage hard work as the only way to greatness will always be found wanting in the comity of great nations. Japan is a case study.

Thanks for your comment. The Japanese are amongst the world's most hardworking people. To them, hard park is more than intelligence. These folks are hardworking!

This is so old!!!

I read this piece when I used to use BlackBerry in 2012

I suspect plagiarism here
Because I have read and seen this before!!!!!!



One of those old BB Broadcast messages!!!!!

Notwithstanding, the content is still poignant!!!

The earlier our kids know we won't meet their GREED, rather than their NEEDS, the better for them. We shouldn't pamper them to their detriment. Love is responsibility. Love is truth.

We must endeavour to instil in them such values to wi make them sensible and responsible adolescents and adults.

I owe my kids more than head knowledge. And that's why I've endeavoured to keep a family journal where they will grow to read my values, beliefs and traditions.

The future of any nation lies in the proper education of its youth- JFK!

DICKtator:
This is so old!!!

I read this piece when I used to use BlackBerry in 2012

I suspect plagiarism here
Because I have read and seen this before!!!!!!



One of those old BB Broadcast messages!!!!!

Notwithstanding, the content is still poignant!!!

Yeah bro. Truth is relevant all the time!

Beautiful

The writeup has some strong points I must say.

Parents must learn to bring their wards up to be strong independent adults.

But to say that there are no spoilt white or western kids is going to far. They exist and there are loads of them.

There are even reality tv shows chronicling their lives include that of the basketballer Johnson whose son is gay.


There is a strong tendency for rich parents to spoil their kids. Its not only Nigerian

Surely will imbibe dis into my Life & my pretty angels to come

#PledgeToMakeCleanMoney
#TrueSuccess

Biliamin:
LETTER TO NIGERIAN PARENTS written by Adeyinka Temitope

I wish to start by adding the benefit of my time as a student and then resident in the UK. Living in Abuja now.

The first thing that I discovered about UK-born, white, English undergraduates was that all of them did holiday or weekend job to support themselves – including the children of millionaires amongst them. It is the norm over there – regardless of how wealthy their parents are. And I soon discovered that virtually all other foreign students did the same – except status – conscious Nigerians.

I also watched Richard Branson (owner of Virgin Airline) speaking on the Biography Channel. To my amazement, he said that his young children travel in the economy class – even when the parents (he and his wife) are in upper class. Richard Branson is a billionaire in Pound sterling. A quick survey would show you that only children from Nigeria fly business or upper class to commence their studies in the UK. No other foreign students do this. There is no aircraft attached to the office of the Prime Minister in the UK. He travels on BA. And the same goes for the Royals. The Queen does not have an aircraft for her exclusive use.

These practices simply become the culture which the next generation carries forward. Have you seen the car that Kate Middleton (the wife of Prince William) drives? VW Golf or something close to it. But there’s one core difference between them and us (generally speaking), they (even the billionaires among them) work for their money, most of us steal ours
If we want our children to bring about the desired change we have been praying for on behalf of our dear country, then please, please let’s begin now and teach them to work hard so they can stand alone and most importantly be content and not having to “steal” which seems to be the norm these days.

We have Nigerian Children who have never worked for 5 minutes in their lives insisting on flying “only” first or business class and using the latest cars fully paid for by their “loving“ parents.

I often get calls from anxious parents” my son graduated 2 years ago and is still looking for a job, can you please assist!”

“Oh really! So where exactly is “THIS CHILD?” is my usual question. “Why are you the one making this call dad/mum?"

I am yet to get a satisfactory answer, but between you and i, chances are that the big boy is cruising around Abuja with a babe dressed to the nines, in his dad’s sparkling new SUV with enough “pocket money” to put your salary to shame. It is not at all strange to hear a 28 year old who has NEVER worked for a day in his or her life in Nigeria but “earns” a six figure “salary” from parents for doing absolutely nothing.

I see them in my office once in a while, 26 years old with absolutely no skill to sell apart from a shiny CV, written by his dad’s secretary in the office. Of course, he has a driver at his beck and call and he is driven to the job interview. We have a fairly decent conversation and we get to the inevitable question- so, what salary are you looking to earn? Answer comes straight out – N250,000.00.

I ask if that is per month or per annum.

“Of course, it is per month”

“Oh, why do you think you should be earning that much on your first job?”

“Well, because my current pocket money is N200,000.00 and I feel any employer should be able to pay me more than my parents.”

No wonder corruption continues to thrive. We have a society of young people who have been brought up to expect something for nothing, as if it were a birthright.

Even though the examples I have given above are from parents of considerable affluence, similar patterns can be observed from Abeokuta to Adamawa.

Wake up mum! Wake up dad! This syndrome – “my children will not suffer what I suffered" is destroying your tomorrow. You are practically loving your child to death.

I learnt the children of a former Nigeria Head of State with all the stolen (billions) monies in their custody, still go about with security escort as wrecks. They are on drugs, several time because of the drug, they collapse in public places. The escort will quickly pack them and off they go. What a life! No one wants to marry them.

Henry Ford said “hard work does not kill.” We are getting everything wrong in Nigeria now, including family setting. It is time to prepare your children for tomorrow, the way the world is going, only those that are rugged, hard working and smart working that will survive. How will your ward fare?

Please forward this to all the parents you know and love. We must begin to save our young children from unintended consequences of "too much love" and weak parenting. It is the only way we can build a strong and decent Nigeria.

Thank you OP. God bless you. I honestly hope some parent will start teaching their wards the real value of life. Children/wards learn how to survive on your own...., think about the orphans or the kids at the orphanage.

@OP.

Such is the penalty to those stealing Nigeria blind. Their family will never have peace. And there's no need to pity them.

Nobody will acquire wealth legitimately and go on spending it the way you described.

God is answering the prayers of millions of Nigerians made poor by corrupt leaders, their children and children children will continue to be useless. And, it's not only happening to Nigerian parents. Such is the penalty of looted wealth everywhere in the world.

For your information, the law of CAUSE and EFFECT (karma) is what is at play here, and there's nothing you can do about it, cause it's the law of nature.

The word of Jah said "YOU SHALL REAP WHAT YOU SOW".

OP, This is a Master piece you have written here and nothing but the truth.
I once saw an Housa guy in Atlanta that was dishing out a Hundred dollar bills on ladies giving him a table dance. It was a white friend of mine that called me to come and see my country's African Prince dishing out money.

I knew some of our governor's and politicians children that throws parties in the US every weekend spending lots of dollars and cannot do any form of job.

In fact, the so called rich has virtually destroyed this country through monies they have stolen from the public.

God bless the writer of this article.
This is the same reason why a lot of Nigeria's formal great men have not been able to reproduce their kind and children of millionaires of yesterday are in financial mess.

The way God designed this world is for us to go through trials and situations and it is through this process that we are strengthened, toughened and equipped for our future. Shielding your children from this process only limits their capacity, a limited capacity is certainly a limited destiny.

Please Op; next time do well to credit the author when copying someone else's write up..

Biliamin:
LETTER TO NIGERIAN PARENTS written by Adeyinka Temitope

I wish to start by adding the benefit of my time as a student and then resident in the UK. Living in Abuja now.

The first thing that I discovered about UK-born, white, English undergraduates was that all of them did holiday or weekend job to support themselves – including the children of millionaires amongst them. It is the norm over there – regardless of how wealthy their parents are. And I soon discovered that virtually all other foreign students did the same – except status – conscious Nigerians.

I also watched Richard Branson (owner of Virgin Airline) speaking on the Biography Channel. To my amazement, he said that his young children travel in the economy class – even when the parents (he and his wife) are in upper class. Richard Branson is a billionaire in Pound sterling. A quick survey would show you that only children from Nigeria fly business or upper class to commence their studies in the UK. No other foreign students do this. There is no aircraft attached to the office of the Prime Minister in the UK. He travels on BA. And the same goes for the Royals. The Queen does not have an aircraft for her exclusive use.

These practices simply become the culture which the next generation carries forward. Have you seen the car that Kate Middleton (the wife of Prince William) drives? VW Golf or something close to it. But there’s one core difference between them and us (generally speaking), they (even the billionaires among them) work for their money, most of us steal ours
If we want our children to bring about the desired change we have been praying for on behalf of our dear country, then please, please let’s begin now and teach them to work hard so they can stand alone and most importantly be content and not having to “steal” which seems to be the norm these days.

We have Nigerian Children who have never worked for 5 minutes in their lives insisting on flying “only” first or business class and using the latest cars fully paid for by their “loving“ parents.

I often get calls from anxious parents” my son graduated 2 years ago and is still looking for a job, can you please assist!”

“Oh really! So where exactly is “THIS CHILD?” is my usual question. “Why are you the one making this call dad/mum?"

I am yet to get a satisfactory answer, but between you and i, chances are that the big boy is cruising around Abuja with a babe dressed to the nines, in his dad’s sparkling new SUV with enough “pocket money” to put your salary to shame. It is not at all strange to hear a 28 year old who has NEVER worked for a day in his or her life in Nigeria but “earns” a six figure “salary” from parents for doing absolutely nothing.

I see them in my office once in a while, 26 years old with absolutely no skill to sell apart from a shiny CV, written by his dad’s secretary in the office. Of course, he has a driver at his beck and call and he is driven to the job interview. We have a fairly decent conversation and we get to the inevitable question- so, what salary are you looking to earn? Answer comes straight out – N250,000.00.

I ask if that is per month or per annum.

“Of course, it is per month”

“Oh, why do you think you should be earning that much on your first job?”

“Well, because my current pocket money is N200,000.00 and I feel any employer should be able to pay me more than my parents.”

No wonder corruption continues to thrive. We have a society of young people who have been brought up to expect something for nothing, as if it were a birthright.

Even though the examples I have given above are from parents of considerable affluence, similar patterns can be observed from Abeokuta to Adamawa.

Wake up mum! Wake up dad! This syndrome – “my children will not suffer what I suffered" is destroying your tomorrow. You are practically loving your child to death.

I learnt the children of a former Nigeria Head of State with all the stolen (billions) monies in their custody, still go about with security escort as wrecks. They are on drugs, several time because of the drug, they collapse in public places. The escort will quickly pack them and off they go. What a life! No one wants to marry them.

Henry Ford said “hard work does not kill.” We are getting everything wrong in Nigeria now, including family setting. It is time to prepare your children for tomorrow, the way the world is going, only those that are rugged, hard working and smart working that will survive. How will your ward fare?

Please forward this to all the parents you know and love. We must begin to save our young children from unintended consequences of "too much love" and weak parenting. It is the only way we can build a strong and decent Nigeria.

dearpreye:


Yeah bro. Truth is relevant all the time!

True that.

It truly doesnt matter how many times this topic appears on FB. What matters is that, it is still very relevant, and a whole lot of us appreciate reading it. I have been on NL since 2007 with my old moniker, and I never came across it in the supposed years that this topic was shared on Front page (2010-2014). So, kudos to the moderators for bringing this up, again.

missdebs:
mo fe lowo ju daddy mi ooo, only in nigeria would u see parents using java phones and dier kids using iphone 6.

I don't see that as a bad thing I use an high end Android and. My parents use Java but I bought it with my money

JustCurious:


True that.

It truly doesnt matter how many times this topic appears on FB. What matters is that, it is still very relevant, and a whole lot of us appreciate reading it. I have been on NL since 2007 with my old moniker, and I never came across it in the supposed years that this topic was shared on Front page (2010-2014). So, kudos to the moderators for bringing this up, again.

Thanks. I'm just reading it for the first time.

One of the "best" pieces I've seen here in a long time.. thank you!

Biliamin:
LETTER TO NIGERIAN PARENTS written by Adeyinka Temitope

I wish to start by adding the benefit of my time as a student and then resident in the UK. Living in Abuja now.

The first thing that I discovered about UK-born, white, English undergraduates was that all of them did holiday or weekend job to support themselves – including the children of millionaires amongst them. It is the norm over there – regardless of how wealthy their parents are. And I soon discovered that virtually all other foreign students did the same – except status – conscious Nigerians.

I also watched Richard Branson (owner of Virgin Airline) speaking on the Biography Channel. To my amazement, he said that his young children travel in the economy class – even when the parents (he and his wife) are in upper class. Richard Branson is a billionaire in Pound sterling. A quick survey would show you that only children from Nigeria fly business or upper class to commence their studies in the UK. No other foreign students do this. There is no aircraft attached to the office of the Prime Minister in the UK. He travels on BA. And the same goes for the Royals. The Queen does not have an aircraft for her exclusive use.

These practices simply become the culture which the next generation carries forward. Have you seen the car that Kate Middleton (the wife of Prince William) drives? VW Golf or something close to it. But there’s one core difference between them and us (generally speaking), they (even the billionaires among them) work for their money, most of us steal ours
If we want our children to bring about the desired change we have been praying for on behalf of our dear country, then please, please let’s begin now and teach them to work hard so they can stand alone and most importantly be content and not having to “steal” which seems to be the norm these days.

We have Nigerian Children who have never worked for 5 minutes in their lives insisting on flying “only” first or business class and using the latest cars fully paid for by their “loving“ parents.

I often get calls from anxious parents” my son graduated 2 years ago and is still looking for a job, can you please assist!”

“Oh really! So where exactly is “THIS CHILD?” is my usual question. “Why are you the one making this call dad/mum?"

I am yet to get a satisfactory answer, but between you and i, chances are that the big boy is cruising around Abuja with a babe dressed to the nines, in his dad’s sparkling new SUV with enough “pocket money” to put your salary to shame. It is not at all strange to hear a 28 year old who has NEVER worked for a day in his or her life in Nigeria but “earns” a six figure “salary” from parents for doing absolutely nothing.

I see them in my office once in a while, 26 years old with absolutely no skill to sell apart from a shiny CV, written by his dad’s secretary in the office. Of course, he has a driver at his beck and call and he is driven to the job interview. We have a fairly decent conversation and we get to the inevitable question- so, what salary are you looking to earn? Answer comes straight out – N250,000.00.

I ask if that is per month or per annum.

“Of course, it is per month”

“Oh, why do you think you should be earning that much on your first job?”

“Well, because my current pocket money is N200,000.00 and I feel any employer should be able to pay me more than my parents.”

No wonder corruption continues to thrive. We have a society of young people who have been brought up to expect something for nothing, as if it were a birthright.

Even though the examples I have given above are from parents of considerable affluence, similar patterns can be observed from Abeokuta to Adamawa.

Wake up mum! Wake up dad! This syndrome – “my children will not suffer what I suffered" is destroying your tomorrow. You are practically loving your child to death.

I learnt the children of a former Nigeria Head of State with all the stolen (billions) monies in their custody, still go about with security escort as wrecks. They are on drugs, several time because of the drug, they collapse in public places. The escort will quickly pack them and off they go. What a life! No one wants to marry them.

Henry Ford said “hard work does not kill.” We are getting everything wrong in Nigeria now, including family setting. It is time to prepare your children for tomorrow, the way the world is going, only those that are rugged, hard working and smart working that will survive. How will your ward fare?

Please forward this to all the parents you know and love. We must begin to save our young children from unintended consequences of "too much love" and weak parenting. It is the only way we can build a strong and decent Nigeria.

Nothing bad in parents assisting their children in any way if they have the capacity to do so.

The topic should have been. 'Stop spoiling your kids'.

The truth is the white folks that ask their kids to work for the reason of not wanting to be labelled 'parents that don't want their kids to go through what they go through is rare.
They may make their kids get jobs so they'll learn to be prudent with money.
Some are concerned about the longevity of their companies after their death.

A major question is 'what do rich white parents go through'.

My own parents farmed and worked as masons.
If my dad would eat in school, he would have to cultivate heaps upon heaps on saturday an friday and he was just 9!

My mum at 12 was sieving gravel at construction sites. Today one is a lecturer the other is a retired banker working in a private establishment. Now when they say they'll try their best so their kids will not. Go through what they went through are they wrong?

For christ's sake you can't compare them to us. You can choose what to be there. This place chooses what you'll be. You can choose this job or go for that job. Here, you try that job or this job. So parents will throw their weight if it ties down a job for their kid.

And it is ludicrous to direct this piece at every Nigerian parents. It is wicked too. The high rate of poverty makes it.