I’m in my early 20s and I began questioning my faith
over 10 years ago. I am now an atheist. I feel guilty
about it but at the same time incredibly proud. It’s
hard to explain. I love knowing that humans are
alone, that we only have ourselves and one another.
That’s an incredible feeling for me. It amazes me how much humans have done and that we didn’t need any divine master to guide us.
Now for the guilty part. My family members are
all religious fanatics, and they are very
certain of their faith. Every achievement
for me meant a new Bible or some preacher’s book
on my bookshelf with what felt like an interrogation
of what I thought of it a month later. This year
was no different, so I suppose I’ll have to read the
stupid thing, unless of course I own up to being an
atheist. I have no idea of what I should do. I’ve
already come out as an atheist to my cousin, who
thought at first I was joking and then started to just
stare at me, which wasn’t exactly the answer I was
hoping for.
What should I do? I can’t go back to religion; I just
don’t believe in it anymore at all. A lot of my school
friends know that I am an atheist and they have been on the most part really cool about it. I worry that one of them might inadvertently say something that might tip my parents off. I would much rather my family hear it from me than find out on their own. What do y'all think about all this?


Sorry for the length of this thing. When I started I
swear I thought it would have been much shorter.

—Secret Atheist