I am not writing this to bash women or speak ill of them, rather I am writing this to understand the rationale behind it and maybe give a piece of advice or two.

This is common among Christians and some working class women. I have noticed that majority of them respect their pastor/boss more than their husband.

The level of Respect some of them often accord these spiritual leaders mostly can actually be said to be awesome.

The respect is so much that whatever they instruct them(women) to do they obey without any second thoughts or arguements but the case is always different if the instruction is from the husband.

Its actually good though but isn't charity supposed to begin from home?

Some women even go as far as kneeling for them in public just to show respect. Does it make sense to go about kneeling for your Pastor, Imam, Boss and atimes even for your Landlord whereas you can't remember the last time you bent half a knee or even squat for your husband at home?

That's hypocrisy if you ask me and God frowns at it.

Does it makes sense to you when you go out there, respecting your spiritual leaders, (who happens to be another woman's husband) whereas you can't show any iota of Respect for your husband at home?

Just incase you don't know, your husband is your first Boss and leader in all ramifications of Life.

Since you have no problem whatsoever, taking instructions from your Boss or spiritual leader and carrying out their instructions to the latter 24/7 then why should you argue with your husband over a few things he asks of you?

Before you go out there to display how respectful you are, please ensure you start with your husband at home.

Accord him his due respect. Let all Godly virtues you want to disply to the world at large, start from your home.

Kindly respect your husband, give him his rightful place. Asides from God, Put your husband first in all you do. It does'nt hurt or make you a lesser person.

You're right and its too bad.


*mod*
FTC only on weekends.
Bless my Endeavours My Creator.


Moreover, I dedicate this to the girl that i am yet to find any fault in.
MyBestFriend,
My Love.

fromnigeria:
You're right and its too bad.

Walahi.


It is always "ok sir", "I will sir" when they are with these people but back home nah "papa junior, wetin you dey talk sef?"

God abhors hypocrites.

Tallesty1:
Walahi.


It is always "ok sir", "I will sir" when they are with these people but back home nah "papa junior, wetin you dey talk sef?"

God abhors hypocrites.

Hahaha

You are not far from the truth... Ladies be good to your husbands, Men don't disregard your wives.

WORD!

The way a lot of people deify pastors these days is worrisome. We need knowledge and understanding

I can't help but agree with you.

These women lack prayers,reading of the bible and understanding it....they believe whatever the men of God utter is very correct and cannot be challenged
If they can seek the face of God on their own and hear from him then it would be the end of this issue

It's a pity sum women v turned dia pastors 2 demi gods in dia endless search 4 "miracles". Sum wud even leave dia matrimonial home 2 move in wit d pastor. Its so annoying ao gullible dz women can be& i wonder wat has apund 2 a deep bible study. As my dad wud say'eni ba n wa iwakuwa,a ri irikuri'

Na so we see am o
So easily deceived

God bless u for this piece OP... This write up sets my heart on memories. Remember a certain time i was trying to date a lady, all she's saying was that, before she could say anything, i'll have to go see her pastor.

Infact, if i've to come to her house again, we'll have to meet at their pastor's house and not her house.

Infact, her pastor's involvement in her life got to an extent, she cant take a small life decision for herself, she has to consult her pastor first.

When she told me, i had to go see her pastor first to see if the courtship would work or not and some other things.

My response was that ''she will never know peace and she'll never have a way forward and God'll as well continue to punish her if she continue to let her pastor take decision for her and not use her common brain and for her pastor, God'll continue to punish that one too as well not until when he teaches u that not all every situations u bring to him''

i vexed and told her to forget every fucking thing about me.. And left her with one word..

''come back and tell me, am a bastard if after two years, u made a single progress for urself if ur pastor is still involved in ur life''

called me sometimes ago and told me ''she's tired of everything and also said, what i said were true.. Saying, she wants to see me and explain somethings to me.. Fixed her meeting for december. No time to waste on a fool

its high time women should start acting wise

elantraceey:
I can't help but agree with you.

I hope n pray ur not in such category.

@lastnogood hi

Alezy:
@lastnogood hi

Hi??

lastnogood:


Hi??

let's not DERAIL

Alezy:

let's not DERAIL

I'm not a derail type of person, you mentioned me for what idk...
Anyways I have no contribution to make to this subject because where I'm from, this problem doesn't exist. In fact, it's a challenge to get families to attend church.
The culture of respecting others is structured in a completely different way. Personally, I don't go around calling my pastor Daddy, my boss is my boss.

If I'm to be a married woman, my currency is love whereas my husband's own is respect. (Wives respect your husband and husbands love your wives). IMO it's easy for women to love but hard to show respect, it's easy for a man to show respect but hard to give love. So I won't go back and forth in a divisive manner.

The only obvious thing, is that it's obvious that marriage is not by force and that both partners must choose wisely. That he's a man doesn't mean that he warrant your respect. That she's a woman didn't mean she is worth your love. If you marry well, then this wouldn't be a problem.

Boss is boss. No comparison between them and husbands. One is intimate one is not.

Pastors and husbands. Yet again one is a spiritual leader and one is a life partner. Also Two different things. No comparison there too.

it is quite correct that all should be respected.
But the relationships aren't the same. While I may be prim and proper for the boss or pastor and full of 'yes sirs', I can't be like that with a husband. We have an informal relationship.

But I do detest people that worship their pastors.
That's a whole new level I see people go to in the name of respecting their pastors.
It disgusts me because it's often easy to see how such worship can be turned into a tool of manipulation by the so called pastor.

So respect but not idolize.

OP remove boss from your list.
Apart from work, where else will the boss come into a woman's life? And yes at work, he's the boss. The husband should wait until she gets home before he expects her to do what he wants over what the boss wants. That's one unnecessary power tussle unless the boss or hubby is not reasonable.

Quite different from pastors. Those ones have no boundaries. Some of them even want you to consult them before making your life or family decisions even though you have a husband who's meant to be doing such with you and not them.

They specialize in Seeing unsolicited visions and tearing couples apart. Permit me to say many of them are quite useless.

Always complaining even on early Monday morning ni 6.33am? Smh


anyway if you are jealous of the way your wife respects her pastor you too do the work of a pastor at home

not even thing is where is my food

nice thread

Op, you're right. . But it goes both ways.. Some men also value their pastor's opinion more than their wives' opinion. .. Some also respect/value their bosses more than their wives... Which is really bad..

So both men and women in this category need to change. .Respect should be mutual in a relationship...

:

Cococandy just saved me from typing an epistle.

That was succinct, especially the husbands-bosses dichotomy. That shouldn't even come up. Both play two very different roles in a woman's life.

As for pastors; it is one of the things many women (and even men) do that irritate me the most. Making a fellow human a demi-god. SMH. If na only me, pastors will be very very insignificant. But then, I'm not the 'typical' christian.

lilmax:
These women lack prayers,reading of the bible and understanding it....they believe whatever the men of God utter is very correct and cannot be challenged
If they can seek the face of God on their own and hear from him then it would be the end of this issue

No wonder the scripture says that people perish because they lack knowledge

cococandy:
Boss is boss. No comparison between them and husbands. One is intimate one is not.

Pastors and husbands. Yet again one is a spiritual leader and one is a life partner. Also Two different things. No comparison there too.

it is quite correct that all should be respected.
But the relationships aren't the same. While I may be prim and proper for the boss or pastor and full of 'yes sirs', I can't be like that with a husband. We have an informal relationship.

But I do detest people that worship their pastors.
That's a whole new level I see people go to in the name of respecting their pastors.
It disgusts me because it's often easy to see how such worship can be turned into a tool of manipulation by the so called pastor.

So respect but not idolize.

OP remove boss from your list.
Apart from work, where else will the boss come into a woman's life? And yes at work, he's the boss. The husband should wait until she gets hime before he expects her to do what he wants over what the boss wants. That's one unnecessary power tussle unless the boss or hubby is not reasonable.

Quite different from pastors. Those ones have no boundaries. Some of them even want you to consult them before making your life or family decisions even though you have a husband who's meant to be doing such with you and not them.

They specialize in Seeing unsolicited visions and tearing couples apart. Permit me to say many of them are quite useless.

I completely agree with you that the two are not the same and to an extent, not comparable but the focus here is the respect and submission being accord to them.

It is undeniable that some women do step out of their line of duty just to please their boss, I can still remember the case of a woman who followed her boss home to cook for him(because his wife travelled)without her husband's consent.

If they can go extra mile just to keep their job then why can't they go @ least half a mile to keep their man happy?.

I am sorry if I am asking too many questions.

SAMBARRY:
Always complaining even on early Monday morning ni 6.33am? Smh


anyway if you are jealous of the way your wife respects her pastor you too do the work of a pastor at home

not even thing is where is my food

Madam I think it is high time you got yourself a new watch or maybe a pair reading glasses.

This topic was posted at exactly 8:33pm On Oct 04 so I don't know where you got your own time from. Moreover, no one here is complaining about anybody or anything. It is a simple question with a piece of advice.

Here is my own pair of glasses(gives it to her) you can keep it until you buy yours.

prettyjo:
nice thread

Thanks

MarvellousGod:
Op, you're right. . But it goes both ways.. Some men also value their pastor's opinion more than their wives' opinion. .. Some also respect/value their bosses more than their wives... Which is really bad..

So both men and women in this category need to change. .Respect should be mutual in a relationship...

You are right. It is annoying

EggovinMma:
:

What happened to your face?

Tallesty1:
No wonder the scripture says that people perish because they lack knowledge

correct

Whatever.

I don't need glasses, I need a cold bottle of stout

Tallesty1:
Madam I think it is high time you got yourself a new watch or maybe a pair reading glasses.

This topic was posted at exactly 8:33pm On Oct 04 so I don't know where you got your own time from. Moreover, no one here is complaining about anybody or anything. It is a simple question with a piece of advice.

Here is my own pair of glasses(gives it to her) you can keep it until you buy yours.

Following boss home to cook for him?

No no no no.

That's a no no. That relationship is not defined at all.

Tallesty1:
I completely agree with you that the two are not the same and to an extent, not comparable but the focus here is the respect and submission being accord to them.

It is undeniable that some women do step out of their line of duty just to please their boss, I can still remember the case of a woman who followed her boss home to cook for him(because his wife travelled)without her husband's consent.

If they can go extra mile just to keep their job then why can't they go @ least half a mile to keep their man happy?.

I am sorry if I am asking too many questions.