Dongreat:
Nice quote "a failed relationship....." but please reference it another time. I don't want to charge you for plagiarism :-)

Lol...are you the author?

@Scantee make you go siddon jare. You wey I de vex 4. If you be say you be my guy I for find confirm Star bottle take shave your bia-bia . But calm down, make you take things easy sha.


@HopeAtHand: Why you de cast me? Since them nominate your oga as minister your body just de sweet you. Make you carry me along o!

scantee:
i really do appreciate ur input, we had misunderstanding sometime last year i called of the r/ship, guess what? SHE FAINTED AND PASS OUT WE RUSHED HER TO THE HOSPITAL FOR TWO DAYS SHE WAS IN COMA, the Dr warned we should avoid anyting that we make her think deep or angered that she has fregile heart, and is fond of crying and fainting anytine i threaned to quit the r/ship, her mum has been the one controling her heart if i may put it that way.

That is just one of the tricks she is using on you, you better end the relationship if you want to have rest of mind in your marriage.

scantee:
called my dad this morning and gave her crew about what is up, bt he seem not interested to hear me out @ all.

I think you should take things easy, fine you want to break up with her buh get ur facts correctly jst like misspicy said. ask her Lodge mates about her movements lately, monitor her, stop d flow of money for now,try to win your big sis over to ur side,she could be of help. do all these just so you know you re not making a mistake.

you never can tell she might not be cheating on u even though her movement is suspicious.
It is well bro.

Yes my dear. Lol. It's a quote by Dr Great Atagana. Long before tiwa use it. Never mind u are forgiven. This once oh.

misspicy:

Lol...are you the author?

qhutetomsel:
I think you should take things easy, fine you want to break up with her buh get ur facts correctly jst like misspicy said. ask her Lodge mates about her movements lately, monitor her, stop d flow of money for now,try to win your big sis over to ur side,she could be of help. do all these just so you know you re not making a mistake.

you never can tell she might not be cheating on u even though her movement is suspicious.
It is well bro.

thanks dear, the truth is that everybody in her school i asked seem to be siding her claiming the same thing she claimed, i don't even know who to believe, but i have lost the trust i have for her as it stands now.

TonyeBarcanista:
@Scantee make you go siddon jare. You wey I de vex 4. If you be say you be my guy I for find confirm Star bottle take shave your bia-bia . But calm down, make you take things easy sha.


@HopeAtHand: Why you de cast me? Since them nominate your oga as minister your body just de sweet you. Make you carry me along o!

abeg bro no vex, me and u still get unfinished business na haba!

baggy4luv:
my guy i pity you..
1.shes is the fish and not something is fishy
2.limit the calls...and wen you do call like a stranger.
3.stop taking dat relationship serious.
4.the lagos invitation should be a fucking spree.(start mirroring evrything she did to you.
5.Dont send that money again
6.Find a girl wey go replace am.
7.stop that your questioning of who are u with.

bro the major reasons i asked her that is because most @times her frnds/course mates is always in her apartment, so to avoid some private talks on phone while shez with people who could figure out our discussion through responses, so i always try to make sure she is a beta placed to talk to me, so is not really about doubting her..

jaxxy:


Did u confirm her story that it Ws actually her gf broda and he is taking post ume for her skol? Did d skol conduct post ume at dat said period? Hv u confirmed it Ws actually her gf broda and bt some other guy?

On the 2nd occasion she faked bad ntwork. My question? Y Ws it only on dat day d ntwork went bad? Or does it happen on other dat wen u call? If she didn't pick 22times then there Ws sm1 definitely with her or else y send u a text instead of picking up. That's shadey!

Now gals cheat and smtmes it can be ignore cos it's just bf/gf thingy BUT wen it's a wife to be bro dats dangerous cos it can creep into ur marriage hence u must be careful.

B4 u started dating her did u asked about her ex bf or past relantionship? If nt u better start asking. Cos I'm nt sure u Knw dis gal beyond wot people close to her hv told u. From wot u say it's her frnds, her parents, bla bla dat say she's a saint bt wot about u? Uve been with her for 3years so wots ur own conclusion about her? Tho u may mt have much to say cos u never arround and dat maybe ur biggest issue to unravel Cos ur relationship move faster than it shud even wen u haven't known her personally enough for it to get to that point. Don't be in a rush and look for time to get to Knw dis lady and who she is or u may end up crying u married a stranger(that people recommended as a saint) cos u alway 90% on water. Seems u know more about sharks than about u gal now. Quite dangerous!

thanx a lot bro, i comfirmed about the guy identity he happend to be her gf brother truely, their school was conducting post ume on the said date, the guy choose to stay back and read so he could attend another post ume exam which comes up the upper in another uni in the same state, my main problem about the guy staying back was that a state from SS to SE is not far and the fare would'nt be more than 1k compare to the feeding expenses as he stays back, 2. She never told me about it until i found out myself. Sharing the same bed with guy on excuse of is raining seanson that one can't use the floor is uncalled for. Concerning the last issue we had, she claimed network was bad, bt i could hear everyting very clear, i have spent quality times with her anytime i am on leave, @ times she spends weeks with my parents if i am not in town, she still maintain that she has never cheated on me even till 2day.

scantee:
thanks dear, the truth is that everybody in her school i asked seem to be siding her claiming the same thing she claimed, i don't even know who to believe, but i have lost the trust i have for her as it stands now.

I still think you should give her the benefits of doubt. Trust nd love her with your eyes open while you try to get ur facts.
its not easy buh jst do this for ur happiness she might be jst d one for you.

You can end the relationship when you have concrete evidences trust me everyone 'll be by your side then.
have a nice day!

MarvellousGod:
You're such an insecure guy! !! Give the girl a rest please. ..

You practically control her life yet you say you trust her... she's probably fed up with your insecure attitudes. .. just look at all your comments on this thread.. monitoring and questioning her all the time...
Don't even know your stand, you say she can't cheat on you yet you want to cancel the wedding cos you suspect she cheats...

Please cancel the wedding, it will do her good....

Until you get a clear evidence, she may or may not be cheating on you. .. quit making assumptions. .

I really can't date an insecure guy like you. . More like monitoring spirit

why are u taking this issue personal? hmmm.... i dey smell something, are u related to her? did u even read what d op wrote up there? read again and comment pls

qhutetomsel:
I still think you should give her the benefits of doubt. Trust nd love her with your eyes open while you try to get ur facts.
its not easy buh jst do this for ur happiness she might be jst d one for you.

You can end the relationship when you have concrete evidences trust me everyone 'll be by your side then.
have a nice day!

lovely

scantee:
thanx a lot bro, i comfirmed about the guy identity he happend to be her gf brother truely, their school was conducting post ume on the said date, the guy choose to stay back and read so he could attend another post ume exam which comes up the upper in another uni in the same state, my main problem about the guy staying back was that a state from SS to SE is not far and the fare would'nt be more than 1k compare to the feeding expenses as he stays back, 2. She never told me about it until i found out myself. Sharing the same bed with guy on excuse of is raining seanson that one can't use the floor is uncalled for. Concerning the last issue we had, she claimed network was bad, bt i could hear everyting very clear, i have spent quality times with her anytime i am on leave, @ times she spends weeks with my parents if i am not in town, she still maintain that she has never cheated on me even till 2day.

Well seems a bit clear on d 1st incident bt how did u Knw d guy Ws sleeping on d bed? She told u? Then it may be harmless bt on d second issue y d shady attitude? Or maybe it Ws just ur imagination? Well keep ur eyes open and don't look at any woman as a saint bt sm of quiet good.

So now let assume she's innocent for now bt not a saint, u Knw her good side bt how about her other sides. To fully Knw a person u must know both gud and bad cos nobody is perfect and then make sure it's balanced.

Have u asked her about her previous relationships? Ex? If not u beta. Just for precaution reason.

At OP,

Your calls are ignored a total number of 22 times at one instance, even text messages are ignored until the next day.

You are not informed of a living arrangement involving a man until a Q & A session is carried out... amongst other things and you are here asking questions.

Guy, no dey dull like this na. What does your gut feeling say?

scantee:
i really do appreciate ur input, we had misunderstanding sometime last year i called of the r/ship, guess what? SHE FAINTED AND PASS OUT WE RUSHED HER TO THE HOSPITAL FOR TWO DAYS SHE WAS IN COMA, the Dr warned we should avoid anyting that we make her think deep or angered that she has fregile heart, and is fond of crying and fainting anytine i threaned to quit the r/ship, her mum has been the one controling her heart if i may put it that way.

That your girl na actress? Which role has she played in Nollywood abeg?
To be honest with you, get ready to be blackmailed everyday of your marriage, and if she doesn't agree with any decision you make in marriage, na fainting galore be that. Are you ready to be rushing her helter skelter to the hospital every time?
I dislike hysterical women
She's a pretender, and most probably a scammer at that.

sihom:
At OP,

Your calls are ignored a total number of 22 times at one instance, even text messages are ignored until the next day.

You are not informed of a living arrangement involving a man until a Q & A session is carried out... amongst other things and you are here asking questions.

Guy, no dey dull like this na. What does your gut feeling say?

To me the girl might not see d need to inform him before d guy came over because he's not living with her perm. jst for the period of the post ume exams,d guy is her friends younger bro which automatically becomes her younger bro,meaning she's older than him nd he's not d one paying her lodge fee so she might be lyk 'Why must I tell him'?
come to think of it do u think she will open up just lyk dat if there's anything between them. nd again what if it was an impromptu arrangement lyk d boy being stranded nd d sister knowing she has a friend there called her to allow her bro put up with her for the exam. let's just reason with her also not in support of actions tho.


wat I feel scantee should be more concerned about since he has confirmed dat truly d guy is her GF's brother is d fact that he called her 22times nd she didn't pick nd had to hang up on him claiming network ish . lyk I said previously drive it to the point that you will have enough evidences to end d relationship

qhutetomsel:
I still think you should give her the benefits of doubt. Trust nd love her with your eyes open while you try to get ur facts.
its not easy buh jst do this for ur happiness she might be jst d one for you.

You can end the relationship when you have concrete evidences trust me everyone 'll be by your side then.
have a nice day!

and u too thanks.

qhutetomsel:
To me the girl might not see d need to inform him before d guy came over because he's not living with her perm. jst for the period of the post ume exams,d guy is her friends younger bro which automatically becomes her younger bro,meaning she's older than him nd he's not d one paying her lodge fee so she might be lyk 'Why must I tell him'?
come to think of it do u think she will open up just lyk dat if there's anything between them. nd again what if it was an impromptu arrangement lyk d boy being stranded nd d sister knowing she has a friend there called her to allow her bro put up with her for the exam. let's just reason with her also not in support of actions tho.


wat I feel scantee should be more concerned about since he has confirmed dat truly d guy is her GF's brother is d fact that he called her 22times nd she didn't pick nd had to hang up on him claiming network ish . lyk I said previously drive it to the point that you will have enough evidences to end d relationship

the arrangement was not done out of a rush because they guy came with cloths that he will use for period of two weeks, 2ndly that her so called friend was her friend during their JSS class in secondary school and only got in touch bak through facebook and have not seen for over 8yrs, is her twinsted that told me that the guy is her frnds bro not that i have any other source i got the information. As u said is no need she telling me about the guy temporal stay in her house, if i may ask you, if ur man is housing a gal that is above 22yrs for two weeks and he never told u even when u guys talks on phone often he never told u he has a vistor and u found along the line how would u take it? Ur man sharing the same bed with a gal almost the same age with him for two weeks..

scantee:
no bro i live in naija here, i work offshore mostly thats why i am always in such condition, believe me everybody that knows the gal confess she of gud character, both families is involve in our plans, the only problem i have with her is only thsese two occations i mentioned above, evry other things is perfect for nw

abeg have u guys had sex.. if so. .. pull on her the hiv positive prank and get her to confess

scantee:
the arrangement was not done out of a rush because they guy came with cloths that he will use for period of two weeks, 2ndly that her so called friend was her friend during their JSS class in secondary school and only got in touch bak through facebook and have not seen for over 8yrs, is her twinsted that told me that the guy is her frnds bro not that i have any other source i got the information. As u said is no need she telling me about the guy temporal stay in her house, if i may ask you, if ur man is housing a gal that is above 22yrs for two weeks and he never told u even when u guys talks on phone often he never told u he has a vistor and u found along the line how would u take it? Ur man sharing the same bed with a gal almost the same age with him for two weeks..

I have shared a bed with an opposite sex for almost two weeks.. we were on a job... buh cash stripped to get another room.. and believe me nothing of sort happened. .

eyinjuege:


That your girl na actress? Which role has she played in Nollywood abeg?
To be honest with you, get ready to be blackmailed everyday of your marriage, and if she doesn't agree with any decision you make in marriage, na fainting galore be that. Are you ready to be rushing her helter skelter to the hospital every time?
I dislike hysterical women
She's a pretender, and most probably a scammer at that.

lol funny u, i think the fainting of a thing is not today thing, base on what her mum said that anytime she is emotionaly hurt so hard she always have problem of breathing, her BP will rise extraodinary, they are familiar with her on that and always avoid hurting her in a such manner. I was actually with her and the mum the day she fainted while her mum was trying to settle the issues.

scantee:
no bro i live in naija here, i work offshore mostly thats why i am always in such condition, believe me everybody that knows the gal confess she of gud character, both families is involve in our plans, the only problem i have with her is only thsese two occations i mentioned above, evry other things is perfect for nw

You are still in denial and defending her action that she is not cheating on you..I am a woman...no woman would drop off her boo''s calls except she is writing an exam or in a class of which the phone will be off...you love her, dont you?....now get the fact...she does not love you as much as you love her.A world is enough for the wise. Don't go and marry and later come on Nairaland to tell us of how this chic turned wife is now cheating on you.move on.

omoharry:
You are still in denial and defending her action that she is not cheating on you..I am a woman...no woman would drop off her boo''s calls except she is writing an exam or in a class of which the phone will be off...you love her, dont you?....now get the fact...she does not love you as much as you love her.A world is enough for the wise. Don't go and marry and later come on Nairaland to tell us of how this chic turned wife is now cheating on you.move on.

my dear am not defending her at all, she said she decided not to pick my calls because she knows that anytime i got upset nothing she would say that i will believe, she was waiting for my mood to calm down before she can explain things, she has sent me more than 20 text sms since today explaining and pleading...

scantee:
You really understands my situation here, the evidence is my major concern now, CHEATING? believe me my only best frnd is SHARK i spend my 90% time on water who then do i cheat with?

Leave dt one bros,we know ashawos used to come to d ship for business na,abi u dey tie ur eyes wen dey come?

D gal is young n has to flex all nw abi is it wen she is married dt she wil b regretting d fins she didnt do as a gal,besides u dnt stay around. Dt gal wil only use ur money to flex.

jaxxy:


Well seems a bit clear on d 1st incident bt how did u Knw d guy Ws sleeping on d bed? She told u? Then it may be harmless bt on d second issue y d shady attitude? Or maybe it Ws just ur imagination? Well keep ur eyes open and don't look at any woman as a saint bt sm of quiet good.

So now let assume she's innocent for now bt not a saint, u Knw her good side bt how about her other sides. To fully Knw a person u must know both gud and bad cos nobody is perfect and then make sure it's balanced.

Have u asked her about her previous relationships? Ex? If not u beta. Just for precaution reason.

ya i asked her about where the guy use to sleep, she told me that they share the same bed on the ground that is raining seasons and rains almost everyday, so she does not have the heart to tell the guy to be sleeping on the floor, though she claim her bed is very wide and can accommodate up to four people, i have not been in her room before so i would'nt know, on the issue of her past r/ship, ya she told me everytn abt it, she said only dated one guy from SS3 - First year in Uni, you know she was born and brought up in Lag, her family stays in lag, she happend to got admission in SE while the guy is schooling somewhere in the west, i met her in first semester 200L, she broke up with d guy on many ground which best known to them, but they were still dating as of the time we met and i told her my intention of getting married to her. So she broke with d guy some weeks after, they guy was even threatning her then, he was using her fb account then to blackmail her, i have to intervane by hacking the account and change password and block off the guy. That has been her only ex..

scantee:
bro the guy is not her ex, is her gf brother, though she is older that guy but the guy has huge body structure that u will not believe, my problem is nt really about the guy spending 2 weeks in her room since i believe in trust, bt the fact she never told me about it until i found out myself, i would'nt mind paying for a guest house for 2weeks 4 d guy, bt she believe she dnt want me to get upset that was why she never told me abt it. The funiest part is sharing same bed 2geda when i asked her why so? Her defence was weak, that is raining season she can't the guy to sleep on the floor, niether can she. I told her why not beg ur lodge mate guys to allow the guy be sleeping there while he eats and bath in ur house, she don't want to inconvienence anybody.

U already v answers to defend ur gal den y r u hre? U r one afraid of breakup n d gal already knw dt n u r nt her kind of man. I dnt blame though .

babysophie:
Leave dt one bros,we know ashawos used to come to d ship for business na,abi u dey tie ur eyes wen dey come?

well all men are not the same, last time i check i can remember our ship taken any ashawo frm naija here to France, spain...etc maybe u should ask ppl

scantee:
my dear am not defending her at all, she said she decided not to pick my calls because she knows that anytime i got upset nothing she would say that i will believe, she was waiting for my mood to calm down before she can explain things, she has sent me more than 20 text sms since today explaining and pleading...

lol....Mr Man...you so much love her that is why you are sympathetic to her excuses for not picking your calls....were u expecting her to tell u that she has another man in her life who is is serving a particular purpose in her life. from all the instances you have told us..it is only obvious that she has a distraction and she does not want to loose you either in other to secure both side...follow you instinct and not you heart...right now you heart cannot distinguish btw truth and lies from you love one.Anyway i pray you have the wisdom to settle this issue without getting hurt at the end.

scantee:
thanx dear, the funny thing here is that she is twins and both of them are members of nairaland and i believe she might stumble on this thread, i introduced her to Nairaland to keep her busy @ lonely time and she introduces her twins sister. Anyway i don't care if she see all these, let her see that people understands her parol, another prob here is that most of her gfs are passing advances to me and she had serious issue with them and deleted al their contacts frm my phone, right now only person that i can call if her phone is off is her twins sister, and u know her sis can never be an insider, her own parol self is worse, her own man base abroad.

U shld v told us u wanted us to beg her for u na.

babysophie:
U shld v told us u wanted us to beg her for u na.

ok

babysophie:
U already v answers to defend ur gal den y r u hre? U r one afraid of breakup n d gal already knw dt n u r nt her kind of man. I dnt blame though .

the advice i seek is not about breaking up rather about not setting the two families into some internal disputes. I am not looking 4 a gf or niether are my bad market, i believe in myself and i believe i have what it takes to date any gal i wish, but as a human i don't like hurting people, i love to have a mutual understanding with people around me, you don't expect me to send the gal parking in an ungentle man way, i rather make her understands her crime so she would have herself to blame rather than tagging me a heartbreaker. Thanx though for ur input