If i understand u correctly, you're saying u gonna break the relationship cos she aborted right?

nues aweso:

Yea. . .I cant hold it. Its too deep for me cos I am fully against abortion. i know ppl make mistake and everyone has got a past but not abortion.

And what if she didnt tell you?

So what if she did it in the past.
Did the Dr tell you guys she can't have babies? Or did she tell you she has done it countless times.
Or are you judging her now because she told you the truth.
You should even be grateful she told you the truth.

nues aweso:

Yea. . .I cant hold it. Its too deep for me cos I am fully against abortion. i know ppl make mistake and everyone has got a past but not abortion.

but it seems you have already made your decision then? if you are 100% against it, then you have no choice but to stick by your values/morals or wharreva you call it. What if she hadn't said anything? 

nues aweso:

Thats where i have a problem, dont want her to have a guilt ot telling me.

She said she had to clear her conscience when I asked her why did you tell me. I further asked if she wasnt scared of me running away and she said at least she had cleared her consc.

I'm just heavy. . .can only pour this out on nairaland cos no 3rd party must hear

well a thousand parties have heard this one,

If you can get past it and you really like her then do as your instinct tells u.

well as you said frankly and openly. you are against abortion and therefore you dont  feel the same way about her any longer.
although you shouldnt judge people by what they have done BEFORE THEY MET YOU, she told you and now you have changed.
i say, be honest with her, tell her how you feel, dont waste YOUR TIME or hers and move on to find that pearl you are looking for.

I still cant believe this is happening to me. . .its hurting!

bros sorry i have said this here on NL before most clinics in whatever city you live in in that land survive mainly on abortions. they are zambians or ghanians coming for it but our people. better the devil you know than the bible bashing unholy stella you may wish to chage her for

MRbrownJAY:

well as you said frankly and openly. you are against abortion and therefore you dont  feel the same way about her any longer.
although you shouldnt judge people by what they have done BEFORE THEY MET YOU, she told you and now you have changed.
i say, be honest with her, tell her how you feel, dont waste YOUR TIME or hers and move on to find that pearl you are looking for.

if na naija forget pearl.  most are ok for religion and hiding things. when you see the pearl dont forget  NL

nues aweso:

I still cant believe this is happening to me. . .its hurting!

haba old mama dey do abortion for nigeria like dem dey drink garri. i beg chill. even deeper life and SU. na who get belle dey do am like we say. nawao

nues aweso:

I still cant believe this is happening to me. . .its hurting!

bross! Move on, abeg, ! Things have changed dramatically on your side, but I say better the devil you know,  

4 the fact that ur gurl aborted is not enough for u to call it quit ok . especially if u really luv her, I think u should appreciate the fact that she told u, what if she had not

Am not canvassing for it or saying abortion is gud

But as a matter of fact its difficult to find a gurl who has never done such a thing  bf either knowingly or unknowingly.

nues aweso:

I still cant believe this is happening to me. . .its hurting!

Look man, just sit down and think about "what if she didnt tell me" -- chief, this life life is not a bed of roses and waterbeds with AC -- we all have heartaches every once in a while.  Fine! you're disappointed, but at the same time, u gotta learn to overlook certain  things. this case is really sensitive, and i understand that, but You claim to love her, if u worried about her having babies -- y'all go see a Doc. And when u talking about your morales and ethics, try and see this as one of those things that happens in life and overlook it. No matter how old we all are,we are still learning, everyday. Life is a learning process man. If she's a nice gal, who knows when u can meet another open-hearted person like that. I am not taking sides sha -- though i dunno her oo, but if you loose her, u might loose somehting good and she's can chooseto go back to her ex who knows her history and be happy with him, u never know,  You dont have a plan B, she does(her ex), so i guess the ball is in ur court, 
Goodluck man!

Well it wasn't your child she aborted. Although I understand where you are coming from, you need to have a serious talk with her. Its obvious you are letting this get to you and you don't feel the same way about her as you did before the news. She needs to know that, you cant build a solid relationship on air, you have to come to a compromise.

It may be hard for you to deal with, but since she has come clean to tell you, i think that is spot on.

If you truly love her, you will have to deal with with bro. Tell me you do not have a past? Tell me if God does

not forgive you when you sin or do foul things? How much more the woman you claim to love. If you really

think she is all that as you have described, pray to God to help you deal with it and move on. All the best.

[center][/center][i][/i][font=Lucida Sans Unicode][/font][color=#000099][/color]so! is she right?

Akinagirl:

Well it wasn't your child she aborted. Although I understand where you are coming from, you need to have a serious talk with her. Its obvious you are letting this get to you and you don't feel the same way about her as you did before the news. She needs to know that. You cant build a sold relationship on air, you have to come to a compromise.

chikito1:

It may be hard for you to deal with, but since she has come clean to tell you, i think that is spot on.

If you truly love her, you will have to deal with with bro. Tell me you do not have a past? Tell me if God does

not forgive you when you sin or do foul things? How much more the woman you claim to love. If you really

think she is all that as you have described, pray to God to help you deal with it and move on. All the best.

Thank you jare.

emilyone:

4 the fact that ur gurl aborted is not enough for u to call it quit ok . especially if u really luv her, I think u should appreciate the fact that she told u, what if she had not

Am not canvassing for it or saying abortion is gud

But as a matter of fact its difficult to find a gurl who has never done such a thing  bf either knowingly or unknowingly.

even for islamic north.  one guy i know is only a doctor with probably some phnsics and  paracetamol build one massion from private practice when i asked he said he is in very profitable area of medicine.  when i came back home i told somwone who asked why i didnt ask what he was talking about.

no one is approving of it but for a naija person to come here shouting abortion i beg talk another thing. i don tell una before na the blood of those unborn violently crushed be one of the things crying against nigeria's land

If you're principled, then she should go, because now she's told u - u know about it and can be called a part-taker if u go ahead with it.
You're even lucky she came out with it now, and without u asking. . .  Things happen in mysterious ways for a reason.  

Be strong

It might be against your morals, but she didnt do it while she was with you, so you should be able to forgive her past.

Unless her past is going to afffect your future, then let it stay in the past.



and yes doctors make millions of abortions.  

^^Dont listen to those who tell u to let her go, ppl deserve to be forgivven, did not Christ even forgive those that persecuted him? Much less to talk about the one you love,

whitelexi:

If you're principled, then she should go, because now she's told u - u know about it and can be called a part-taker if u go ahead with it.
You're even lucky she came out with it now, and without u asking. . . Things happen in mysterious ways for a reason.

Be strong

thats not you in the pic, why did u steal someone's pic?

she's pretty dumb telling YOU something like that.

nues aweso:

Thanx all for concern.

Just been bogging my head with different scenarios and thats why its getting at me.

What s the condition of her womb? Only God knows. . .Possible future scandal from the ex. . .Will she go into complex and think i've done her a favour? . . . .Blood of the unborn child . . .Why do i deserve this knowing that I have been very clean on my own part? . . . Too many issues

Its just messy. . . think I'll take a walk

Listen to your own conscience, its there to advise u, girls will always ask u to forgive her like u have a personal issue with her. . .  The issue here is between her and that unborn baby, and u will take sides by sticking with her. . .  Free yourself!

All of thoes questions you are asking right now. You need to sit down and ask her these questions, you all need to really communicate now. Work it out.

platinumnk:

thats not you in the pic, why did u steal someone's pic?

Awwww, thanks

@Poster,

Since you have made up your mind, why come on NL for advise?

I hope you do not get yourslef into a situation where people will

have to judge you on your past actions. Then you will know exactly how

it feels and what it means to forgive and learn to deal with things.

Well said Chikito. Poster, what makes you so pure? No one and I do mean NO one is pure or above a mistake. Did she ask God to forgive her for aborting an innocent life? If so, then ask her to forgive herself and you too forgive her.