1. If my partner shapes up, then our relationship will work just right , It's not what Ur relationship can give 2 U, but what U can give 2 Ur relationship.

2. The grass is greener on the other side, If I choose a new partner, then they won't bring me all this unhappiness I'm going thru

3. My inner longing for happiness can only be met by what my partner says or does to me == No one has the responsibility for ones happiness.

4. My family & Friends are more important than my relationship ,  True! Families & established friendship are important,but the new friendship & family Ur trying to build is more important and requires more energy than the one already established.

5. Putting Ur partner in a box,  Having a domineering, controlling, controversial & argumentative attitude, will only run ur relationship to the ground and remove the individuality, strength and uniqueness of each party, and what they bring to the relationship.

6. Inflexibility,  Not sensitive to the feelings, pain and hurts ur action is causing your partner and refusing to communicate, listen, have compassion or value the differences in each other, thereby adapting for growth of ur long-time partnership.

7.Friendship ,  Constantly picking on the shortcomings of your partner and never celebrating their strength’s, makes them feel unwanted, unloved and not having ur friendship, which is vital for longterm partnership.

Hmmn, you have said it all Are you single or do you have any single brother like you

@Busybody

What.if.he's.single? Hnmm

perhaps im mistaken but isn't benheart a lady?

I like

benheart:

1. If my partner shapes up, then our relationship will work just right , It's not what your relationship can give 2 U, but what U can give 2 your relationship.

2. The grass is greener on the other side, If I choose a new partner, then they won't bring me all this unhappiness I'm going thru

3. My inner longing for happiness can only be met by what my partner says or does to me == No one has the responsibility for ones happiness.

4. My family & Friends are more important than my relationship ,  True! Families & established friendship are important,but the new friendship & family your trying to build is more important and requires more energy than the one already established.

5. Putting your partner in a box,  Having a domineering, controlling, controversial & argumentative attitude, will only run your relationship to the ground and remove the individuality, strength and uniqueness of each party, and what they bring to the relationship.

6. Inflexibility,  Not sensitive to the feelings, pain and hurts your action is causing your partner and refusing to communicate, listen, have compassion or value the differences in each other, thereby adapting for growth of your long-time partnership.

7.Friendship ,  Constantly picking on the shortcomings of your partner and never celebrating their strength’s, makes them feel unwanted, unloved and not having your friendship, which is vital for longterm partnership.

I agree with all other points except number 2 and 5. . .


For your number 2 point. . .I don't think anybody should be chained into being in a relationship with someone who doesn't make you happy just because you ain't sure if its greener at the other end. . .  Everyone one has the right to be happy. . .and if your with someone who doesn't make you happy. . .then bounce. . .and move unto to someone who'll make you happy. . .
Life is all about taking risks. . .and if we don't take a step towards happiness we would never get a chance at it!


and for your number 2 point. . .your loved one, family and friends are all important and its all about striking a good balance between the three. . .none of these group of individuals should feel undermined.  . .

I would want to think you are writing from a female point of view but still i won't deny some truth attached to your post.

nice and pure

tutuola:

perhaps im mistaken but isn't benheart a lady?

I swear the intimacy was male when I POSTED my "proposal", he prolly sensed my desperadoness and wimped out and legged it, wharradisgrace  Guess he ain't man enough for me, its his loss i guess

justkunmi:

@Busybody

What.if.he's.single? Hnmm

With desperados like  me around, he will hastily retract his Nairaland membership and even pay to release himself too, lol