By Aunty Julie

I’m in deep shit over relationships. I’m a 35-year-old woman and met a very handsome 43-year-old man. We’ve been dating for five months now and still haven’t slept together. My problem is that in the beginning of our relationship, he asked me how many men I’ve slept with and worried about how he would react, I lied and told him I’d slept with seven men. But after a few months, I could not live with the lie and finally decided to tell him the reason why I still haven’t slept with him yet. I told him I didn’t want to make love because I was scared that he’d lose respect and eventually leave me like all the other men. At this point he asked me again, just how many men were there, to which I replied forty-three. His reply was, “Hmm, one for each of my birthday.” And from that day on, I never heard from him again. I don’t get it , why is it that when men sleep around, they’re studs , yet when women sleep around, they’re sluts ? Why can’t women have their fun too?
Dudu, Abuja

Dear Dudu, I’ve spoken with quite a number of women asking the same question. I don’t want to pass judgment on women, nor am I saying that women shouldn’t enjoy themselves sexually. But men and women are never the same.

You expressed fear about losing respect and the way I feel as a woman is that women should be worshiped by their men. An object that has value is worshiped, respected, cherished, and shared with very few deserving people. As soon as you start sharing that object with anyone and without care, the object starts to lose value. The more people use the object, the more it depreciates and the less bargaining power it has: this is a plain psychological fact of life.

Most women don’t realize the importance men place on a woman’s promiscuity. Women think that because men don’t care about how many women they’ve slept with, they won’t care about how many men their woman has slept with. But the reality is that most men, those looking for a serious relationship and not a one-night stand do place great value on a woman’s sexual restraint.

There was a time when many women cherished their bodies much like a sacred temple where only a noble man, one who respected and loved her, had access to her body. But over time, it seems that women have failed to realize the important role their sexuality plays in finding a long-term mate.

Thanks to the women’s movement, women are so busy trying to compete with men, including in the sex department, that they fail to realize the consequences of their actions. Today, it seems that women are the ones who are collecting notches on their Prada belts by giving their bodies away too easily. But if women themselves don’t value their bodies like they used to, why should men? Some women will argue that if men have the right to sleep around, so should women. But I ask only one question: If women adamantly believe this, then why is it that when faced with the question of how many men have they slept with, most women who have slept around with truckloads of men always lie? Some women will rationalize that they must do so because men can’t handle the truth. But if this is the case, why don’t women let men decide for themselves if they can or can’t handle it? Why do women need to lie to protect men’s egos? I think women lie to protect themselves rather than men because if it’s not shame or regret that’s making you hold your tongue, then the potentially dire consequences of the truth surely are. The power lies with women…

http://www.vanguardngr.com/2016/02/i-lost-my-man-because-i-slept-with-so-many-men/

Just 43 men and the man dey vex?

Wetin dey do am? that means say if na Ini Edo or Tonto Dikeh confess give am how many people them even remember, the guy go faint. My advice? any woman wey man ask that question, CONSCIOUS OR NO CONSCIOUS abeg lie give am.

Hmmmmmmmm

When u were fvcking upandan, u neva have a thought that u would get married sumday... foolish slut.

HungerBAD:
Just 43 men and the man dey vex?

Wetin dey do am? that means say if na Ini Edo or Tonto Dikeh confess give am how many people them even remember, the guy go faint. My advice? any woman wey man ask that question, CONSCIOUS OR NO CONSCIOUS abeg lie give am.

Are you married?

Hmmm some people past are something different. She is likely married to 43 men before meeting dat guy.

wat kinda crap write up is ds? 43 men? n u still expect him 2 stay? presently he s running 200km/hr, when a key(dick) can unlock so many door(pussy) it's a master key n d shape remain dsame. but wen a door(pussy) is been open by over 43. different key(dick) then Uv got no security! my guy don run 4 hin life!

43 is crazy but some gals these days are not up to that age but have surpassed this figure

Make I read

if we warn them., them dey hear. especially teenagers...why lie if u are sure of urself.!!!

To put it in perspective with the rule of "Once Debe"

means if a man marries that woman, 43 men can come and have her even though she's married.

say to admit, I know. You will need to watch a woman like that like, the CIA,FBI,NSA combined. lolz

Jesus wept!!!!!

niggi4life:
Jesus wept!!!!!

john 11 : 35

Dude has a great sense of humor, "one for every birthday" had me cracking.

*clears throat* Anywayz, Dude is plain stupid and sure as hell doesn't deserve bae. A lady who tells you a lie pertaining the number of men she's slept with definitely respects you. I blame bae though, pu.ss.y no get meter, she should have stood by her ground of seven.

That babe deserves some hot resounding slaps! !!
Why reveal that? Every body get skeleton! That dude sef fit be murderer.


Silly lady! If i have a silly friend tell me this kind sorry story,i will ask her to take a silly ass out of my house immediately.Mumu!


So God Wey call Hosea three times,"Hosea!Hosea!!Hosea!!!Wake up!E be like say you don drunk again,useless man!Oya waka,go Benin bypass, pick any olosho there Wey make sense marry!"

NA MISTAKE E DO?UNA HOLY PASS GOD?

That's too many na. If she had said 4 or 3, that would be acceptable. But for a 35 year old to have slept with 43 men in the past?! That's not normal at all. Unless she was once a runs babe.

Really high mileage! I certainly don't blame the guy for running away from a retired runs girl.

Well so sorry so keep your legs together.

yous self, 43 plenty na ahah

EggovinMma:
That babe deserves some hot resounding slaps! !!
Why reveal that? Every body get skeleton! That dude sef fit be murderer.


Silly lady!

Na so una go dey support rubbish. There are virgins at 43, male. Not everyone is rotten.

43 men......


I give her a bronze medal for such award

the worrying part in this ish isnt the number of men (43) she had slept with but the number of times she must have slept with each man....
she could have slept with one man 15 times......so do the maths

EggovinMma:
That babe deserves some hot resounding slaps! !!
Why reveal that? Every body get skeleton! That dude sef fit be murderer.


Silly lady!

I'm scared to know what's in your cupboard...lol !

Blacksodje:
the worrying part in this ish isnt the number of men (43) she had slept with but the number of times she must have slept with each man....
she could have slept with one man 15 times......so do the maths

Now this is the real problem

He is not your man, just the 44th person.

Hmmmm

a slut is a slut. they dont deserve respect

#modified....i lost my man because i dnt love him

So she keeps count of all the men she has a thing with....I dont believe this

I don’t get it , why is it that when men sleep around, they’re studs , yet when women sleep around, they’re sluts ? Why can’t women have their fun too?
Madam, @ 35 u still don't get it..?? Not a surprise dey all leave u. And dey will continue to do so. After welcoming more than 35 men down there, it must have lost it's grip and firmness.. Can u wear a slacked trousers? The same way it will fall off is d same way he will sink in; feeling absolutely nothing!!
Now the truth is dat you can't get your dream guy again.. Prepare 2 be a 4th wife 2 an old man dat doesn't know the difference

forty what?