CONFUSED set of people.
COMPLICATED beings.

PresVA:
It's quite unfortunate, some people allow what they see or hear to affect them even without them experiencing it.. When they keep mindsets like this, why won't the saga come?

Those praying for their MILs to die, hope you know your future DILs will say same prayer for you? What goes around comes around. ..

It's not a preconceived idea. You enter a marriage in good faith hoping for a good relationship with everyone. Your mother in law gets hatefull what do you do.
Of course if you've never experienced this you will assume people are making up this stuff.
It's real my dear their are nasty monster in laws out there

My mother in law is SATANS ONLY GIFT to the world.
My husband thinks she has a mental disorder
My father in law has called elders on this woman six times already that was last year,
The kind of cases she faces in the village is beyond anybody.
She hates all her daughter in laws. She has chased one of my sister in laws from her house four times. My brother in law and the wife had to move to another town because of her. She controls the house of another sister in law.
One of her daughters marriage failed and she came back home. You should have seen my mother in laws crocodile tears, it almost filled a river.

In 30yrs time, Another set of daughters in law would be posting the same thing about these same people complaining about their mother in laws currently

Abiagirl777:
Cant forget on 4th I was terribly sick,I begged this woman to bath her 4mth grandson,she ignored me.I was on my knees in the bathroom struggling to bath My son while she was watching movies(my husband drove out to buy her bread bf we leave for the hospital),he was enraged when he came back.
By 6am on sat. We woke her to prepare its time to go.
I shed tears,God forbid that there are actually women who live what Mama G portrays on TV(her fav. Actress)
To think they were estranged for years and I brokered peace between them before our traditional wedding so she'd start enjoying her 1st son again .
Her 2 other children is apologising to me on her behalf

You just described my mum,she might even be worse.

goodgate:
You just described my mum,she might even be worse.

What does your mum do na?

Miami11:

What does your mum do na?

She is all shades of DIFFICULT.I pity her employees.I will fight for my future wife sha,she already said i can't marry from a particular tribe or else it will be war.I don't know why i come from this kind of love-less family.

I love that it's not all horror stories on this thread.
Truth is that if you're a good MIL except your DIL is crazy, she'll appreciate you.

Miami11:

I keep distance from my mother in law. The woman is devil's reincarnate.

Your own dey learn ooo
I kept my distance n it resulted to another wahala. in fact, marriage tire me cos of dat woman. I was ready to leave to have my sanity back. The worst is d son is so scared of her. Who will speak for me?

Miami11:

I keep distance from my mother in law. The woman is devil's reincarnate.

Your own dey learn ooo
I kept my distance n it resulted to another wahala. in fact, marriage tire me cos of dat woman. I was ready to leave to have my sanity back. The worst is d son is so scared of her. Who will speak for me? Thinking of relocating to a far away state.

Faith111:


Mine too....
My MIL seems exceptional. Maybe because of her foreign exposure. But she never interferes in our affairs. I remember when hubby and I were still courting...When I visit the family house, hubby serves me food and when I'm tru eating my hubby will take the dishes to the kitchen while I sit like a queen and she never frowned even for once..
Whenever I try to clear up dishes or clean up, hubby will insist that I don't..

When Hubby told her he wanted to get married to me, she said it's kol that she won't stay with him and so won't decide who he should marry...

If I visit her, she gets my breakfast and hot bath water ready before I get out from bed...
She baths my daughter and washes clothes...Yet she is very comfortable financially..

Cos of the love She shows, I naturally do everything to make her happy...
If her daughters jokingly complains, I tell them to go and meet their MILs and stop disturbing mine.They'll all start laughing cos she takes sides with me.

My own dey even vex to see me n my hubby eating together or call him honey.she says is disrespect. Na so I start call am brother *** ooo. lol

thelish:


My own dey even vex to see me n my hubby eating together or call him honey.she says is disrespect. Na so I start call am brother *** ooo. lol

Please you are Comedian...
I laughed and laughed after reading your post...
How you go call am brother...
Some MILs nor get joy ooo.

thelish:


My own dey even vex to see me n my hubby eating together or call him honey.she says is disrespect. Na so I start call am brother *** ooo. lol

that's absurd

thelish:


My own dey even vex to see me n my hubby eating together or call him honey.she says is disrespect. Na so I start call am brother *** ooo. lol

I can relate my dear. My own will be sad if me and hubby look happy, she will go lock herself in her room.
It poses a very challenging situation, I live very far away. You would think distance makes it better, no it don't. But it helps with avoiding interfere rance.
It helps if your husband knows what kind of a mother he has, then he can prepare you ahead of time.

Miami11:

I can relate my dear. My own will be sad if me and hubby look happy, she will go lock herself in her room.
It poses a very challenging situation, I live very far away. You would think distance makes it better, no it don't. But it helps with avoiding interfere rance.
It helps if your husband knows what kind of a mother he has, then he can prepare you ahead of time.

but you're not a nigerian.how come your mil is wicked

oloyede252:

but you're not a nigerian.how come your mil is wicked

I don't think it's a Nigerian problem lol. It is rampant in this our Africa due to limited resources.
I think an angry, irate, insecure, wicked person has a potential to be a wicked in law.
I think a good person remains a good person no matter who comes to their lives.

Miami11:

I don't think it's a Nigerian problem lol. It is rampant in this our Africa due to limited resources.
I think an angry, irate, insecure, wicked person has a potential to be a wicked in law.
I think a good person remains a good person no matter who comes to their lives.

ehya.so you all know this.

cococandy:
that's absurd

Coco, if only d grammar go calm things down. lol

Faith111:


Please you are Comedian...
I laughed and laughed after reading your post...
How you go call am brother...
Some MILs nor get joy ooo.

Hahahahaha. u never see anything.
Nor be for peace to reign?
I even said I don't want again, instead of treating me like someone wtout feelings dat fell from d sky. Make she come marry. Make I leave d prickk for her ooo.

Miami11:

I can relate my dear. My own will be sad if me and hubby look happy, she will go lock herself in her room.
It poses a very challenging situation, I live very far away. You would think distance makes it better, no it don't. But it helps with avoiding interfere rance.
It helps if your husband knows what kind of a mother he has, then he can prepare you ahead of time.

My hubby can't talk ooo. he is scared of d mum. So its either we move to a faraway state or I move alone with my kids. Na money still hold me for this place.

Pidggin:
Mother-in-laws are too possesive, if only they can let go, peace will reign.

i guess dat include urs too. And why shdnt dey be possessive? After spending 9mths in sumone body, she watch the baby grow up n become a man/lady.Who wldnt be pls after many years spent together? The main problem here is dat mothers dont see their kids as grown ups, no matter how old dey(children) r. Coz, the image dey all see of them is dat of when they(children) r little, needing love n care always. The child most esp. the man shd be the one to keep telling his mother dat he is an adult now n must also behave as one. I will like to knw ur view on dis same issue 40yrs frm now.

Miami11:
Some mother in laws are trouble some, very hatefull,
They feel they are in competition with the daughter in law
That is how my mother in law behaves

dat is how all women behave, regardless of age. they see demselves as competitors. U people r really ur own worst enemy.

NoQualms1:
Some mother-in-laws are really good. Mine was. When I gave birth to my first, she came. She bathed her, pressed my body, cooked. And she stayed for a year, taking care of my baby for me. She hardly complain. If I offend her, she'll tell my husband, not even her husband or other children heard any complain about me.

And just 5 days ago, I gave birth to my second. She has been sick for a month, I was praying that God should heal her if only for the sake of my newborn but she passed away 3 days ago. She was a rare gem indeed. I'm not sure I've heard of mother-in-laws being that nice. Hers was different. Almost all my friends had issues with theirs. I don't just know why she had to die now but God knows and I've accepted like that.

u will live longer dan u ever wished for. Remember to reciprocate such, even better to ur future DIL. RIP TO GRANDMA

Haywhymido:
dat is how all women behave, regardless of age. they see demselves as competitors. U people r really ur own worst enemy.

Let me paint a scenario to you. Imagine ur FIL visits for a month and suddenly you find your wife meeting FIL for directions in normal day to day activities, what she normally does with you. All her spare time she spends gisting with her dad, she serves you your food then serves her dad and stays with him to finish his food. May be you want to eat pounded yam a certain day, you tell your wife and in front of you, your FIL says it's too much stress that she should make eba instead and she makes eba telling you to manage that FIL is only staying for a short while. Let's also say you don't joke with news say from 7 to 10pm and everybody knows but then that's when FIL seizes the remote and watches Nat geo wild and him & his daughter are enjoying it and chatting away. Tell me in this scenario, how will you feel and what will you do

That's because they are EVIL

soonest:

Let me paint a scenario to you. Imagine ur FIL visits for a month and suddenly you find your wife meeting FIL for directions in normal day to day activities, what she normally does with you. All her spare time she spends gisting with her dad, she serves you your food then serves her dad and stays with him to finish his food. May be you want to eat pounded yam a certain day, you tell your wife and in front of you, your FIL says it's too much stress that she should make eba instead and she makes eba telling you to manage that FIL is only staying for a short while. Let's also say you don't joke with news say from 7 to 10pm and everybody knows but then that's when FIL seizes the remote and watches Nat geo wild and him & his daughter are enjoying it and chatting away. Tell me in this scenario, how will you feel and what will you do

the wife must be childish to be doing such, sure i will feel bad. And I will talk to my wife abt it.For surely, it is the wife dat is leading FIL on such silly acts, in my own house? I will rather take it out on my wife dan taking it out on my FIL. If there is to be a case inwhich u av to correct ur MIL on her flaws,let the son do it. Or dont u think a MIL will find more convenient to listen to correction frm her son/daughter dan her DIL.

Haywhymido:
the wife must be childish to be doing such, sure i will feel bad. And I will talk to my wife abt it.For surely, it is the wife dat is leading FIL on such silly acts, in my own house? I will rather take it out on my wife dan taking it out on my FIL. If there is to be a case inwhich u av to correct ur MIL on her flaws,let the son do it. Or dont u think a MIL will find more convenient to listen to correction frm her son/daughter dan her DIL.

I agree with you totally. Atimes one's spouse doesn't get why you should complain at all. You can be termed as intolerant you know.
By and large, inlaw relationship is as old as the world,one has to find a peaceful way around it.

this topic is an African problem. I remember when i was in secondary school, some girls always pray that their mil is dead before they marry, then i do pray for God to meet her alive and she should be my other mum, God does answers prayers.

mil is very nice and straight forward, she is very kind as she loves her son like kilode, that love is transferred to me. she was with me in my first pregnancy a month before i delivered. after i put to bed, 6 weeks, she washed baby and my clothes, cooked for me and makes sure i sleep well. she is God sent.
she always tells me how nice her mil was to her.
I think she is just a good woman cos that's exactly how she is to her other son's wife too. she is a genius. and i always try to make her happy.

Most of these wicked women also had their share of wickedness and they are transferring the aggression.
wish all of those with wicked and mean mil will also not turn out to be mean when the time comes.

My MIL her own dey taya me... That woman can talk if she cums 2 visit she complains alot even wen am feeding my baby and maybe the baby jst cough she'll be like do u want 2 suffocate the baby! My own pikin kwa She shouts @me @ evry little mistake... I don suffer... Wel i see her lik my mum sumtyms i ask myself wat if she's my biological mum wat wil i do So i jst let go atimes

dhabeautyjas:
this topic is an African problem. I remember when i was in secondary school, some girls always pray that their mil is dead before they marry, then i do pray for God to meet her alive and she should be my other mum, God does answers prayers.

Do they have brothers? That mean their brothers wifes would pray their own mothers too die before he marries

Do they plan to have sons? That means they would also die before their son can get married

thelish:


My hubby can't talk ooo. he is scared of d mum. So its either we move to a faraway state or I move alone with my kids. Na money still hold me for this place.

I think moving with your hubby and kids is the best option.
Keep your distance, maintain a lot of privacy, let hubby know to keep home affairs between you two, ( I think I can relate to your experiences thelish)
I only get to see my mother in law once in a few years and that helps.
Do you know the last time she came to visit me with her daughter, my younger sister in law, she instigated so much trouble,
She kept on telling her daughter that I was jealous of her( a girl about 15 years younger than me)
She would say her daughter is prettier than me( I mean such word from an elderly woman) then she would yank my stuff and give them to her daughter without permission and this is when I drew a line with them.
Then they would sit down gossip about me as soon as I left the room,
Anyway this got to my sister in laws head and she started pulling an attitude on me
Guess what I banned her from coming back to my house, she does not even know where me and hubby live and she is not welcomed,
Good thing I have many in laws that I get along with fine, my father in law is wonderful, he will warn you about my mother in laws behavior.
So just do what works for you, keep your family strong.

Miami11:

I think moving with your hubby and kids is the best option.
Keep your distance, maintain a lot of privacy, let hubby know to keep home affairs between you two, ( I think I can relate to your experiences thelish)
I only get to see my mother in law once in a few years and that helps.
Do you know the last time she came to visit me with her daughter, my younger sister in law, she instigated so much trouble,
She kept on telling her daughter that I was jealous of her( a girl about 15 years younger than me)
She would say her daughter is prettier than me( I mean such word from an elderly woman) then she would yank my stuff and give them to her daughter without permission and this is when I drew a line with them.
Then they would sit down gossip about me as soon as I left the room,
Anyway this got to my sister in laws head and she started pulling an attitude on me
Guess what I banned her from coming back to my house, she does not even know where me and hubby live and she is not welcomed,
Good thing I have many in laws that I get along with fine, my father in law is wonderful, he will warn you about my mother in laws behavior.
So just do what works for you, keep your family strong.

We really are in d same shoes, but mine is tighter than urs. She has campaigned all sorts of bad stuffs about me, to whoever that cares to listen. Her children that were good pals suddenly came to fight me, dat their mum said I insulted her. I asked them if I have insulted them for once, then start it with their mum? For 2yrs now, we r still not in good terms. All kinds of swear to hubby for not chasing me out of d house.
What pains me most, was that I once took this woman as my mom. I was even closer to her than my mum. She is a great pretender n a backstabber. I feel so betrayed my dear. Na once my sweet marriage tire me o. Just feel like leaving her son for good. But he hasn't really wronged me in any way. Just that he will not talk when he needs to. He can't stand to defend himself talk more of another.