So I was at work jeje when a friend sent me a link and I couldn't stop laughing after reading! Not married but I can relate with Mr Dike Chukwumerije's plight after 8 years of marriage! Lol...BTW, this is actually his anniversary message to his wife!

8 THINGS I HATE ABOUT BEING MARRIED TO YOU
1. You are shouting something from somewhere, only God knows what you’re saying. So I look up from my desk and yell, ‘What did you say?” You shout back something, only God knows what you’re saying. So, I grumble to myself, get up, walk to the top of the stairs and yell, “What did you say?” And you shout back something, only God knows what you’re saying. So, I hiss to myself, walk down the stairs, to the door of the living room, and find you curled up on the couch reading. So, I take a deep breath and ask quietly, “What did you say?” And, looking totally surprised to see me there, you peer over your book and say, “Oh, I was just wondering where you were.”


2. If I ask upstairs, then ask downstairs, then ask before I start peeling it if you want dodo and you say, ‘No, no, no’. Then I peel it and fry it, sit down to eat it, and you sit opposite me – and in the name of ‘keeping me company’ – take one single dodo and put in your mouth. I hate it.


3. When I am sleeping and you wake me up because I am snoring. Honestly, before God and man, is it fair?


4. You complain and complain that you take care of
everybody in this house from morning till night and
nobody ever takes care of you. So I get up the next morning and say I will make you breakfast, and you act excited and follow me to the kitchen. Then I open the cupboard and select one pot, and you sigh like someone recently bereaved. So, I ask, ‘What is it?’ And you say, ‘That is my work. I only use it when I’m making Chinese fried rice’. So I select another one, and you say, ‘Ehm, I don’t use that frying pan anymore.’ And I turn around and ask, “Should I let you do this?” And you say, “Perhaps it is best”.


5. You come into the sitting room. I am watching a movie. You ask, “What is that?” I press the “i” button. You read the info and say, “This is a nice movie, why didn’t you call me?” I say, “Sorry”. You sit down. Three seconds later, you ask me, “Who is this man?” I say, “I don’t know. I have not watched the movie before.” Ten seconds later you ask me, “Is he going to kill her?” I say, “I don’t know. I have not watched the movie before.” Six seconds later you scream and ask me, “Will she die?” Honestly, I hate it.


6. You hold up 2 dresses and ask me to pick one. I do a quick ‘tun-bum-tun-bum’ in my head and point to the one in your right hand. “Really?” You look disappointed. “Doesn’t it make me look fat?” So, I point to the one in your left hand. “Really?” You look disappointed. “I think it makes me look short.”


7. When we are sitting at a table somewhere and a girl with a ‘look at it’ bum walks past and you immediately start looking into my eyes, and keep looking into my eyes till she has passed the point where I can only see the glory by very obviously turning my head… Honestly, before God and man, is this fair?


8. Now, you are frowning. So, I ask, “Is everything ok?” You say, “Yes.” And I go back to writing this article. Please, how is this ‘insensitive’?


Shared with my fiancee and she admitted to being guilty of all of the above! So to the ladies, are you also guilty of all this?

This indeed is a hilarious way of describing women especially the married ones. Their wahala is beyond imagination. Indeed the only way to survive living with a woman for 50 yrs or less is by turning all their actions into comedy just like this man did.

Hahahahah yea am jt dy all guilty

naijadeyhia:
This indeed is a hilarious way of describing women especially the married ones. Their wahala is beyond imagination. Indeed the only way to survive living with a woman for 50 yrs or less is by turning all their actions into comedy just like this man did.

U're so right!

My fiancee is fond of eating from my own plate even though we're eating the same thing! So one day I asked her why, and she said, "Nothing na! Just wanted to know if yours is tastier!" WTF

doublezero7:


U're so right!

My fiancee is fond of eating from my own plate even though we're eating the same thing! So one day I asked her why, and she said, "Nothing na! Just wanted to know if yours is tastier!" WTF

Yeah or when my wife would serve me the same meal and pieces of beef as she is having but will still insist on exchanging one or 2 pieces of beef of hers with mine mid meal and I am like " but its the same thing" and she is like " yours looks really good" smh real crazy

naijadeyhia:



Yeah or when my wife would serve me the same meal and pieces of beef as she is having but will still insist on exchanging one or 2 pieces of beef of hers with mine mid meal and I am like " but its the same thing" and she is like " yours looks really good" smh real crazy

Women ehn!

I can't actually wait to get married tho!

It's the last one I can relate with the most. You ask is something wrong, she says NO and you go back to what you were doing......she starts giving you attitude.

You'll just be like in your head wetin I do nao nao nao nao again?

This is sooooo funny, can't wait to try them all out
Infact all women should try them all out, no man deserves to go unpunished

guilty of none but, maybe I'd apply some. Im not the nagging type and hardly picks at hubby.

On point. We women are funny creatures. But if you don't stress men,who will?

southernbelle:
This is sooooo funny, can't wait to try them all out
Infact all women should try them all out, no man deserves to go unpunished

Are you kidding me? So it is a must for all men to get that sort of treatment? Haba!

Hilarious! Feel like getting married right away!

doublezero7:


Women ehn!

I can't actually wait to get married tho!

Ayt27:
It's the last one I can relate with the most. You ask is something wrong, she says NO and you go back to what you were doing......she starts giving you attitude.

You'll just be like in your head wetin I do nao nao nao nao again?

Asin eeh....these creatures are jst funny

Walexsammy:
Asin eeh....these creatures are jst funny

Your own creatures are not Funny



I was talking to myself
He asked you said what
Told him I wasn't talking to him
He face him work
I kept murmuring
He moved closer, you OK
I said I am fine
Continued my talking to myself
Dude just hissed, you always fond of talking to yourself
Did he go away from where I was? I can't rem

Bottom line
I wasn't talking to him and didn't ask him talk back

pwettiejay:
Hilarious! Feel like getting married right away!

Will you marry me?

No Sir

Will you marry me?
[/quote]

Very cute!