What exactly is it about the NYSC scheme that kills relationships?

I've had many friends and other none- friends who have lost their otherwise perfect relationships because they or their partners went to "serve" Nigeria for one year.

I always thought twas an original commitment problem until my own fiancee, not girlfriend now o, fiancee, walked out of our relationship because of another guy she met during the service year. And I could have laid down my life to defend her commitment to the relationship.

My hurt apart, i'm just trying to reseach what are the reasons that this happens so often!

im sorry i wouldn't know but in every relationship one person loves more and hard, guess she is not the one in this case. don't blame NYSC, she's always got what i call the HO-FACTOR. she would have slipped anytime just thank God u found out sooner.

i think u're right about her. but does that mean we can say the same for everyother guy or lady who's walked out on their relationships? its isn't just mine or a few others, there've been many i know about!!!

Hi.
While i was serving, u cld see alot of girls go down with some of this deceitful guys (even married women).
I just believe they've always been like that, they dont just have the opportunity before then.
Just thank God u got to learn soon. They cant even keep themselves for 3weeks of camp not to talk of a year.
Wish u goodluck as u search for a new partner. (Maybe u shld not go for about to be corpers again)

u are correct i cant explain the evil behind NYSC even my last relationship was broken by NYSC and the girl was avirgin b4 she went

kachii:

u are correct i can't explain the evil behind NYSC even my last relationship was broken by NYSC and the girl was avirgin before she went

so she said?

Thx kachii. Thats exactly my point. My fiance was d perfect example of good girl, We dated 4 nearly 3years, And believe me, i wasn't blinded by love. Unlike d girls Nikegenius mentioned, she's not one to sleep around. Still she messed up, Even she admited that. It all just doesn't add up, I av a couple other female friends who broke up wit their bfs cos of guys they net within d service year. My point is d statistics are kinda too glarin to ignore, Even d good girls aint so good when it comes to d service year!

I guess one year is a lotta time for some pple.

@Topic

  Ever heard the saying "Character is what U are when nobody's watchin"?
Dt explains the whole NYSC syndrome.

Your bobo/babe ain't there.
Your parents ain't there.
Your pastors ain't there.
Nosy church members ain't there.

  What d'U expect?It's the perfect opportunity people have to explore their freakiest fantasies-
And good girls do have fantasies- don't be decieved.

First of all NYSC scheme brings Nigerians from all parts of the country and every tribe more or less has a representative in a state courtesy of the NYSC. This enables pple to have a view of the country in totality with less restrictions.You have the freedom to choose within a wide range. But in the pre-NYSC relationship, the range of choice is very minimal and parties to not have the chance to choose the best or what they like most.That is the reason why Pre-NYSC relationship collapse within the service year. Secondly the Scheme gives young pple the chance to be independent without any influence from either parents or gurardians and therefore enables them to choose with limited restrictions.

While I may have heard some 'horror' stories about the NYSC and relationships, I do nothing but bless the memories of my service to my country as a Youth Corper as well as bless the town known as Isi-Alangwa in Abia State, where I met my sweet, oh so sweet wife.

Without that opportunity provided through NYSC, I doubt if I ever would have met, let alone marry her. I guess NYSC means different things to different people afterall.

Character traits has nothing to do with NYSC. It is basically an altitude thing. Many of us went through the NYSC scheme and we did not leave our spouses or did we? Whether Gentlemen or
Ladies it is a matter of ones desire at any giving time.When two people are not meant for each other to desire for one to leave the other can come at any time. again, there is something called latent. A bad girl could be good until a situation or circumstance bring out the the bad part of her and verse versa. And remember, some mothers do have them and they must always act true to type, the bad ones i mean. So take heart about what happened to you and thank God it happened now cos definitely it must happen. NYSC or no NYSC.

na wao.
i served in calabar and sex was just the in thing every nite. every morning u just see condoms all over the ground tho lightout's at 10pm.
it's like everyone's equal once u're in those ugly khakis and remember they give free contraceptives anyway.

the "koko" is just that the real you comes out when u're accountable to no one else but you.

You Love someone you met only briefly more than a partner you've had for as long as the world was created.
The NYSC is just a one year exercise and i believe any relationship built within that space of time is likely to make someone to gaga over.

But i still believe that faithfullness counts and there are still faithful ones, if your partner really loves you for who you are and exercises the true love then, NYSC is nothing compared to what the both of you share.

@ Gbenga


Did u serve at itakpa in Obi LGA?
let me know please

i tink the NYSC scheme is a test of the really character of one wen u are INDEPENDENT,
during that period ur are able to test ur own sense of judgement and action, wat eva is done dis period is like a true pix of ourselves,
not everyone that went for the programe lost there bf/gf and also not evry1 that went there as "GOOD" came bak dat way

i bliv its a personal tin

TayoD:

While I may have heard some 'horror' stories about the NYSC and relationships, I do nothing but bless the memories of my service to my country as a Youth Corper as well as bless the town known as Isi-Alangwa in Abia State, where I met my sweet, oh so sweet wife.

Without that opportunity provided through NYSC, I doubt if I ever would have met, let alone marry her. I guess NYSC means different things to different people afterall.

Hey Tayo, my mum worked with NYSC Isi-alangwa for a while. When did you serve?

Meanwhile, I've been in the NYSC system since I can remember (my mum works for NYSC) and I've seen what happens during orientation. Sometimes people are really in love but other times a lot of people feel that those 3 weeks give them license to do whatever they want. It's disgusting. It's like people have no shame. It's amazing how much HIV and other STDs are spread during the service year especially those three nights. I say that all those corpers are all adults and they should start acting like responsible adults and be careful what they do and the decisions they make. At the same time, I wouldn't blame NYSC. Like I said before, they are all adults and they are should be able to take responsibility for their actions and not blame it on NYSC.

Girls misbehaviour during the NYSC scheme is a common thing and its just very unfortunate. I'm currently serving in bauchi state and i know exactly wat is going on.Like Bolarge said "character is wat you are when nobody is watching.both guys and girls tend to misbehave whenever they are far away from their"people", when they feel no one is watching them and so they can do wat they like.
Another thing i want you guys to understand is that boredom makes some girls to go astray(even when they are married). Its lack of self discipline on their part i agree but these things happen. Imagine a girl posted to a state ministry in a place like bauchi state. she only goes to work maybe once in a week or once in two weeks without being punished and doesnt have any PP she's doing. She'll be in her house from morning till nite and remember the saying that "The idle mind is the devil's workshop".
Well, there are two sides to a coin, like someone said it all depends on whether u guys are meant to be together forever, if ure not then u'll definitely break up during NYSC or after.

Dammy, i think i absolutely agree with your point. So much time with so little to do leaves you with options u'd other-wise not consider. Hope u wont 'jabo' ur bf or hussy sha (if u av one) duting ur own service year

@gbengis
I'm not working in a ministry and i'm a very busy person (too busy for a corper sef)so I can NEVER 'jabo' my boyfriend cos one 1year-fling.Its just not possible

Honestly, i would have to say that NYSC has caused more damage than good to us the youth and I beg anyone who has benefited from NYSC to please contact me and relay his/her experience.
To the subject at hand its not just intimate relationships that suffer but there are hostile environmental as well as cultural issues that change people permanently.
I don't blame NYSC directly but service to Nigeria sure facilitates painful experiences and changes, however simply choose to move forward by changing as well.

@dammy0405
'm really proud to hear that, pls keep it up. I'm sure your man will value you for that! cheers

Anybody messing up during NYSC doesnt really love the other person, simple and short

u  see my people  is like NYSC give chance to  most people that do not hav opportunity to enjoy themself when they are at home. But immediately they reach  Service they suddenly turn to anoda thing.

infact during my own service lik 3 ladies approached my theirself n u kno now body no be wood i need to serve them in order to fulfil servicing my fathers land. They dont eveen bother even if u de do am for standing just to serve them well n d relationship will juts be as if u dont kno each other.

My conclusion here is dat some ladies cant do without FULK  n when there ''insertser''  no de around they will definitly  invite another available guy to use d advantages.


Just TAKE IT.   It commons ammong  ladies.

HARDWARE 4 U

NYSC is not to balme let blame the one who cant hold on!
this haapen to alot even marry women are not left out.
it think it's just crazy to hide behind distance; to cheat or dump your relationship!

I think Nysc brings A LOT of people who otherwise would never have met together and that is a good thing. people WILL always misbehave, you cant blame that on NYSC,
I believe that sometimes it takes somethnig like the NYSC (which by the way brings together in an intimate way thousands of young men and women who have their hormones raging to high heavens for at least 3 weeks) to expose you to that wonderful person youve always wanted to be with. Ive met a lot of women in my life and 90% of them didnt make any sense. It took 3wks in NYSC camp to meet the only girl that has to date ever struck a chord in my heart.

by the way diyo, whats cracking girl? hows work and all?

i completely agree with bolarge.a lot of guys n girls feel a lot freee on camp.especially those that were restricted at home.well,all man shld be careful.AIDS dey town.it was horrible during my own camping.terrible!they don't care who's watching.

orientation, three weeks permission to misbehave.
QED

u r not alone MAN,
i prays she comes bac

my guy na so we see am o its a very terrble syndrome,even i have been a victim.anyways, id seriously advice every guy whose girl passed the litmus test to stick to her and those that didnt to go Bleep themselves but deep down i think its got a lot to do with the KOKO factor