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|Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by mctowel01: 9:49am On Mar 29, 2016|
This will be really long, but I beg you to try to read to the end. Its long cos I want you to really understand the situation. This is one of the deepest parts of my life I am about to share. I should have opened a new account for it, but, well, does it change anything. I have to be real here. By the way, this issue cuts across both religion and family.
I am having serious problem with my mother. When I say serious I mean where its come to a do or die affair. The thing is that I am the first son, so I get to be told from my mum about my destiny, how I was born, what I have to do and that evil people want to spoil my destiny. My problem is that my mum has been attending a spiritual church where they see visions. Sometimes the vision could be as vague as "There is something bad in front of you in the spirit, pray against it" to visions of the past like " You use to steal/lie...go and make amend with God before coming back". My problem with the place is that it kept messing with my mind, I didn't know myself cos I was dependent on what one visioner says about me, my mind was revolving around too many things which in most cases re bad things. You know when your conscience i not calm, you are fighting so many thoughts and questions. I cant really explain it but a lot was going on in my head.
My mum is the complete definition of a home-based fanatic(she doesnt go about evangelizing), but her case is so bad that she doesnt even have any friends, and she made sure we never had or played like we should when we were kids all because, she felt our neighbours are evil, the mother of my primary school friend who she has seen just once is evil, our landlord and his wife who even doent live with us are evil and into juju against us, the house they lived in just after marriage was filled with evil people who are plotting against us, all our housemaids are evil and the people who sent them are evil and using them to plot against us, our 2 drivers who use to pick us from school are evil,anybody she quarells with is evil, and finally, Yoruba people are evil while all calabar girls are demonic, infact this caused tension when she said I must not select cross-river for my nysc choice of state because calabar girls are evil. If you have noticed, I have not talked about her view on my fathers relations because it warrants that I talk extensively about ut
My father's immediate brother is evil, his wife is also evil, they are plotting evil against us. His last brother in the village is evil, infact all of his siblings in the village are evil, and they are trying to bring him down. His mother is a witch, his 2 sisters are also witches, so travelling has always been an unpleasant journey I ve never anticipated doing with my mum because it becomes awkward when you try not to eat the general food cooked by all the wives in the family compound, because they are all evil and wicked people or when my mum publicly sprinkles holy water around family members in the compound(family compound) whie binding demons there. It got really bad when she said that my dad's recently divorced junior sister is evil, that they are all conniving together and plotting against us. This is how she puts it "the other day ozy(my aunt) came and was looking at us, when she saw me she started smiling and looking around, looking for where to penetrate and attack from, she now said 'have my children eaten', so that she will know whether to feed them poison." Its really sad and anytime I do not agree with her, a serious quarell ensues. And am really trying to stay on my own. Did I even talk about our tenants?, when we became landlords, one was calabar, so she was always fighting with her, and obviously she was seen as evil to the extent that anytime she called any of us concerning maybe water or light, my mother would be nervous, trying to ask too many questions, from me, before raining curses on her. And it doesnt ened there, we ve been doing all manner of fasting and prayers concerning all these people that God should destroy them and all. We engage into serious aggressive prayers saying that the woman is planning something in her kitchen against us and all, so we should bind the juju. So my mum makes us do all those prayers, that God should destroy all these people with my dad's family members, but they are all alive, living their lives. To her, my father is not himself, he is just the effect of a manipulation from his family members and any good thing that my dad brings to the house(like new car or promotion etc) is as a result of her prayers, cos my father is not himself.
And I am tired, I am really tired, this is not my life, this is not the life I bargained for.This has been on ever since I had consciousness, about 20 years now and yet the same story. My biggest problem which I see is that the more you pray, and yet nothing happens, convinces her that much more prayer is needed and the people are really evil, so more prayer, and hence more prayer for really really evil people. This is going into an endless pointm like a closed curve where you think you ve gotten to the end, but you are still on the same path, but with stronger conviction that you are dealind with something really deadly.
This is where my dad comes to the whole scenario. We are foundationally Catholics, but when I was young my dad, who is catholic before anything else, missed mass on sundays cos of work so was never really spiritual. My dad and mum are complete opposistes in this religion thing. He is not atheist, but he tends to dwell on scientific and logical paths before anything else. Let me say, he is just a simple christian and yess, he has very strong moral nd ethical values. He has never even prayed with us(family prayer). So with my parents being opposite, I guess that's why I wasnt fully indoctrinated doubtlessly into any path, as my mum was a fake catholic then who just went cos of marriage and for sunday ceremony and even held the chapel(spiritual visions church) in higher regard. So it took me a while(2013)to define and decide my stand, where I feel comfortable, and my conscience was at peace. I was one atheist, tho for a short period, but now, I consider myself catholic, tho not a strong one, cos I am not a full believer in all of catholic doctrines. I just can't be part of the Nigerian Pentecostal movement.
Since I have known my parents, they have always quarreled, which I know to be common in many marriages. So I don't know what happened first; whether its the visions given to her that came before the arguments started or the arguments led her to go deep in those vision thing and fully dwelling and basing life on it. My dad has made it very clear that he doesnt want to hear all these visions, he doesn't want to hear that you had a dream at night, infact he lost his mind one day, flared up, high bp took in and was hospitalized cos of this before. But to my mum, its still manipulation on him from the village.
So, my mum has been disturbing my life ever since. I have said that I don't want to be part of all these spiritual stories. It was only bringing complications. This life is too short to be spending it with complications which, at the end of the day, even the devoted mfm memebers go through the same life challenges and misfortunes as an atheist. Unless we want to decieve ourselves, even if Nigerians pray and fast from now to the end of the year, misfortunes or rather challenges will still come, and good things will also come. Luck will always favour some, while some will have to grind much harder for what they want, whether religious or atheist. Change will not come from prayers alone. My mum is part of the people that attributed GEJ's tenure to spiritual issues, that all Nigerians need to come together to pray for GEJ. I have never seen when americans needed a change and rather than fighting for it, decided to pray. It doesnt make any sense. My mum has gotten to the extent of coming to wake me every night to pray, that she saw something in the spirit, that she saw vision, that the house is being spiritually attacked.
The only way I can really explain this is like to be forcing a christian to be moslem, making it a do or die affair, like a life ambition. It cannot happen. Everyday, no peace. I have said I will just pretend for the sake of peace, she doesnt even want me to rest even when I pretend. I will be starting service soon, but what about before then and when next we see.When we pray in the morning, its always drama, because my mum says I must bind different kinds of spirits in my life, that I am praying petty prayer not meant for us. The only passage in the bible she knows is "Since the days of John, the kingdom of God suffered violence and the violent take it by force", and the psalms for war prayer.. We dont talk about the new testament or Gospels. Even when I try to be on my own, my mum wakes me up at night to pray mfm fire prayer, with all the annoying spiritual talks during the day. The other day, she said I should carry my certificate to mfm to pray. I cant do that.. Its not my life. I dont even understand the mindset people use in doing all that, but, I can never confront someone on his choice of beliefs. I believe its personal and as far as you find peace in it, and you are not constituiting nuisance, thats what matters.
I really appreciate my mum, with what she has sacrificed for me. But the fanaticism is really irksome. She has made it unequivocally clear that she wont stop till she sees me grrounded in battleground prayers. Anytime, we are together, she can just flare up and start telling me about all the evil people our family is contending with. Infact it was so bad that we reall had a tough time when the son of my dad' sister, young in his early 20's, came to stay with us after his school, so as to kickstart his career and setup himself. It was war everyday, he was seen as devil sent. This guy was earning 30k/month when he first came, and was trying to be self sufficient to a good extent...Yet my mum said that he was their route to monitor us. Nothing he did was considered good and my mum was forcing me to comply with it. It got so bad that he initially use to buy little stuff like bread and groundnut, when he saw that we were throwing it away, he stopped. My mum accused him of not showing warm regards by buying little things(which she will still throw away). That he is very evil and all. I was really wondering how someone who has a life ahead of him will be having time for all those rubbish. She made sure he didnt have peace till he left. It was so bad that she will be praying midnight, the go to his door and be raining curses on him and his family. Whenever she told me to pray and I didnt curse him also, we always quarreled. I am really tired.
My dad traveled recently, so she sent one of the visioners from the church to come talk to me. I felt stupid. And I have made it clear that I don't want any of those rubbish. I found peace in my choice of religious life in 2013 and made a decision to do away with all these spiritual stories, yet my mum never stops saying that "I will pray to go to the village to possess my possession and inheritance"
Please, is someone also going through this, please advice a brother. I am getting sick of all these.
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|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by tgmservice: 10:06am On Mar 29, 2016|
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by delishpot: 10:07am On Mar 29, 2016|
Just stand firm in your decision and make her know you mean business. She will soon see you as being possessed and start fasting for you. She will believe you are not in your right mind and ignore trying to make you change. She will now I crease her prayer and fasting to include unocking your chains. L
11 Likes 1 Share
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by kevoh(m): 10:14am On Mar 29, 2016|
Your mum's case is irredeemable and tending towards disguised form of insanity. Her brand of religion has made her ANTI-SOCIAL.
As for you, she still has some control over you probably because you are somewhat dependent on her for a few financial aid else I don't see any reason why you should be bothered and not be able to tell her off when she comes with all those advices, visions and prayers filled with hatred against other people.
Till you have your own appartment and start being independent, I doubt there will be much you can do to curb your mum's actions (I stand corrected) meanwhile I advise you focus more on your Dad's health. Getting HBP over issues like this is not worth it.
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|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by Tee99(m): 10:19am On Mar 29, 2016|
This your story long o! I have nothing useful to tell you just that your drama with your mother won't end any time soon.
5 Likes 1 Share
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by emeraldknytt(m): 10:43am On Mar 29, 2016|
seriously, I am not too sure but a part of me thinks your mum is insecure and not completely stabilized. If I may ask, does your mum do anything? Trade? sew? knit? work? anything
17 Likes 2 Shares
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by mctowel01: 10:44am On Mar 29, 2016|
Tee99:Azn, ahe has made it clear that it will never end. She has close alliance with many pastors and MOG's so she keeps reporting me to them. So if they see me, they want to talk to me
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by mctowel01: 10:46am On Mar 29, 2016|
kevoh:My dad's hbp happened years ago. He sometimes leaves or turn up the tv when my mum starts talking, cos she won't stop.
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by Jollymich(m): 10:55am On Mar 29, 2016|
At your age you are now a man and she is your mother and will always be your mother for sure but the issue here is " Absolute Control" she is trying to rob you of your fundamental right. Don't touch,assault,slap or beat her but if she tries to use physical force on you jack her throat against the wall for like 2mins just to instill fear on her so she will stop i pray she will not die she will be surprise. Protect your father so she will not cause HBP from her ignoramus. Seriously shout on her to stop . Me i beat my mama and she could not believe it i did not kill her if i dont beat her up the villagers would have set our house on fire but when they came to burn our house an saw me beating my mother they on rescued her and took her to police station for the crime she committed later our family when behind and bailed her since that time she remain loyal even report on time fear me more than her husband that is discipline. But the problem she is not following up so well with family affairs because i brought heavy shame on her andn she felt depressed till now some women are Adolf Hitler that require powerful invasion from manly acts. If you continue to do "Mpi-anya" you will die like one of my father and elder brother that lost there life listening to my mother. Now i made her realize that am incharge and i can send her home to her fathers house because i will occupy my fathers house and preside over it and not her what a rubbish.
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|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by kudoxs(m): 11:05am On Mar 29, 2016|
This is critical
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by emeraldknytt(m): 11:07am On Mar 29, 2016|
Jollymich:this one na wayray oh! Which kain advice be dat. Op no go jack your mama 4 neck o, cos by then she will take your name to mt. Zion mt. Everest + mt. Guguru this guy funny sha
79 Likes 1 Share
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by Jollymich(m): 11:33am On Mar 29, 2016|
The mother is the real witch and witches do not deserve pity if you pity them they will bring bad luck so let her down after all your father bring the money she only annex it that women selfish nature my wife has freedom over everything around my but there are times and limitations i put i place to supervice her excesses and omissions she wouldn't want me to raise eyebolw or fronw i thank God she is responding to my condition. As in if you do peace on right platform you will enjoy freedom of peace as long as you are good once you mess up I loose my flippancy and she hates it i supports her very as in making monetary provions and some domestic chores calling water tanker to fill overground tank and and buy fuel for daily use but cannot tolerate her painting finger nails when she's suppose make meal for the family and my precious koko mama lol and my mum is now good Because new sheriff is in town and no bail out.
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by lepasharon(f): 11:53am On Mar 29, 2016|
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by mctowel01: 12:15pm On Mar 29, 2016|
emeraldknytt:She is into teaching. I tell her she needs to stop listening to those people(visioners) but she says that if not for the visions and her prayers, i would have been useless, that the evil people in the village would have messed with my life and destiny and my father would have gone down.
3 Likes 1 Share
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by Baawaa(m): 12:26pm On Mar 29, 2016|
To be sincere with you,you need DELIVERANCE, tell your mum that you want to do deliverance. I promised you, after the deliverance things will change
1 Like 1 Share
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by hope4charles(m): 12:42pm On Mar 29, 2016|
Don't threaten her or she will hold a special prayer for u, just try and get your own apartment and get a job and leave house, but I am scared for your father and siblings, she could go bunkers on day and something bad, or she might be advised negatively by some fake man of God to harm somebody. Be careful, apply wisdom and above all just make sure u attend chu church services, been an atheist is B. S man is a religious being and trust me there is this things religious especially Christianity does to people that really helps them to overcome life challenges, don't look or hope on any man of God they are humans to and must make mistakes if u follow them instead of God u will derail.
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by mctowel01: 1:12pm On Mar 29, 2016|
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by mctowel01: 1:13pm On Mar 29, 2016|
Baawaa:Deliverance from what?
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by jayriginal: 1:19pm On Mar 29, 2016|
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by mctowel01: 1:22pm On Mar 29, 2016|
Jollymich:My mother is not a witch.
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by Baawaa(m): 1:22pm On Mar 29, 2016|
mctowel01:Deliverance from power of atheism
3 Likes 1 Share
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by asalimpo(m): 1:27pm On Mar 29, 2016|
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by mctowel01: 1:35pm On Mar 29, 2016|
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|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by asalimpo(m): 1:44pm On Mar 29, 2016|
Your mum is effectively paranoid.
You should think about your stance on issues critically , in light of God's word if you're a christian,
then make your decisions.
You dont need to get physical with her but put down your foot in a firm manner that communicates resolve.
Put a lock on your door and forbid her from entering your room without your consent.
She'll try the "children obey your parents " thing - but it will be as a ploy to make you surrender your
will to her unconditionally. Parents have used that bible verse to maninpulate and control their childrens lives to oblivion.
The key, is begin to take responsibility for your decisions and get ready to bear the consequences.
For the pastors, tell them firmly , that you no longer want any audience with them.
And that you wont entertain a next visit. One, no one can force anything on you without your acceptance.
So, men walking up to you and plying you with advice, when you dont want to receive them is a waste of time.
Begin, to take back your life.
Tell, her and make her know that they're barriers and boundaries that shouldn't be violated because of
religion. In civilised countries, a court notice, a restrictive injunction would have been served against her.
To check her excesses.
In a way, your father allowed this and let it grow. Women, are like cars without brakes, they just
flutter to the edge of their emotions. Give them the steering and they can go haywire.
Your father should have take the control of the family and steered it but i think he's a complaisant type
who doesnt want to offend the wife.
You can begin putting this things down.
Note, women are very manipulative. And when a woman, takes the helm of the family she'll want to control others beneath her.
Most women, use the religion thing to bid power in the family.
She's paranoid and deluded. It will get worse if not checked.
Choose your path and stick with it, eventually , she'll give you your space.
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|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by mctowel01: 5:19pm On Mar 29, 2016|
jayriginal:Lool, i taya o.
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by asalimpo(m): 9:29pm On Mar 29, 2016|
mctowel01:Your conversion isnt complete but move a lil closer to God from idols (mary and the sun wafer - see ya a jack chick comic near you or visit chick.com to know the frying pan you are in ).
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by IamBLAZER(m): 9:03am On Apr 10, 2016|
Religion!! a tool to confuse. all the religious books I've read have only one and the same Lesson... "Be a Good man". I believe the religion you belong to doesn't matter as far as life is concerned... God belongs to none. and so just obey His will and live on.
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by dammytosh: 9:03am On Apr 10, 2016|
Be wise about it.
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by Drabeey(m): 9:04am On Apr 10, 2016|
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|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by psyqs(m): 9:05am On Apr 10, 2016|
Na today the Mods see dis post....smh
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by Nobody: 9:08am On Apr 10, 2016|
My mom and I
When a girl says she prefers to marry a guy whose mom is dead, it ll be like the girl is evil
Shey na person go get this one as mother in law.
21 Likes 1 Share
|Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by cutelover19(m): 9:09am On Apr 10, 2016|
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