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Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me - Religion (2) - Nairaland

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by livebullet(m): 9:47am On Apr 10, 2016
Mintayo:
Op. What is the name of your mum's church?
Arr you a christain? A spirit filled christain.?
Is it possible for you to leave the house for a while?
@op this one is ur mother's kind ..."spirit filled" abeg which kind spirit. Shey na Aromatic schnapp or ogogoro?

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by LyfeJennings(m): 9:48am On Apr 10, 2016
Niggaa, your mama is crazy mehn
Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by Blade21: 9:49am On Apr 10, 2016
mctowel01:

Azn, ahe has made it clear that it will never end. She has close alliance with many pastors and MOG's so she keeps reporting me to them. So if they see me, they want to talk to me
ignore them respect but don't fear them your mum is obsessed don't even play by her rules

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by Manueleee(m): 9:51am On Apr 10, 2016
Chai. Too long, well u said is a long story. @list i try and read it. My advice, study ur Bible, live ur life normal and b prayerful. The Bible said i choose to have mercy on those i wish. Is not d level of ur prayers. God have s own way of doin tins.

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by ikombe: 9:52am On Apr 10, 2016
Emu4life:
DO U knw wat caused it? Jesus is god and jesus is son of god at d same tym.......u can go and tell dz long story to ur reverends so dat dey wil clarify u if Jesus is god or son of god
Lol christians can confuse someone eh grin
Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by YelloweWest: 9:52am On Apr 10, 2016
Op stop going to any church where they see vision.
Go to a real bible based church and trust God to fill in the blanks.
I was once like u. Only trusting and believing what visioner said. The moment I decided to stop attending those kind of places, started attending an Anglican church, God has turned my life around. Everything started falling into place. Try it.

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by Bjergtrolde: 9:54am On Apr 10, 2016
kevoh:


Your mum's case is irredeemable and tending towards disguised form of insanity. Her brand of religion has made her ANTI-SOCIAL.

As for you, she still has some control over you probably because you are somewhat dependent on her for a few financial aid else I don't see any reason why you should be bothered and not be able to tell her off when she comes with all those advices, visions and prayers filled with hatred against other people.

Till you have your own appartment and start being independent, I doubt there will be much you can do to curb your mum's actions (I stand corrected) meanwhile I advise you focus more on your Dad's health. Getting HBP over issues like this is not worth it.

I would not use that word as it is derogatory but I agree with your direction of reasoning that mental illness may be at play here. Perhaps paraphrenia.
Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by GeneviveHuby: 9:54am On Apr 10, 2016
Jollymich:
At your age you are now a man and she is your mother and will always be your mother for sure but the issue here is " Absolute Control" she is trying to rob you of your fundamental right. Don't touch,assault,slap or beat her but if she tries to use physical force on you jack her throat against the wall for like 2mins just to instill fear on her so she will stop i pray she will not die she will be surprise. Protect your father so she will not cause HBP from her ignoramus. Seriously shout on her to stop . Me i beat my mama and she could not believe it i did not kill her if i dont beat her up the villagers would have set our house on fire but when they came to burn our house an saw me beating my mother they on rescued her and took her to police station for the crime she committed later our family when behind and bailed her since that time she remain loyal even report on time fear me more than her husband that is discipline. But the problem she is not following up so well with family affairs because i brought heavy shame on her andn she felt depressed till now some women are Adolf Hitler that require powerful invasion from manly acts. If you continue to do "Mpi-anya" you will die like one of my father and elder brother that lost there life listening to my mother. Now i made her realize that am incharge and i can send her home to her fathers house because i will occupy my fathers house and preside over it and not her what a rubbish.
brother you are a real man! Advise op to really follow your path. Fix the family issue. Don't run! Don't stay and what the issue. Jump in and fix the problem. See your self as the captain of the ship. Embrace shame, take the insult and deliver happiness to every one including your mum. I just don't know why some women tend to grow into such spiritual dimension. I admired Obioma when I was in UNN, but the I made my approach, after hearing my wooing epistle she said that God revealed this to her dream blablah blah...how a little bird was shot and the mother flew.. From there I just pinched myself(na them. Na that type). Baba you what I did after then.
Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by ikombe: 9:56am On Apr 10, 2016
livebullet:

@op this one is ur mother's kind ..."spirit filled" abeg which kind spirit. Shey na Aromatic schnapp or ogogoro?

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by BiniShrine(m): 9:56am On Apr 10, 2016
asalimpo:

Your conversion isnt complete but move a lil closer to God from idols (mary and the sun wafer - see ya a jack chick comic near you or visit chick.com to know the frying pan you are in ).
it's well with you for real... Can you hear yourself? Can't you leave the church and faith he chose to stand with than attack it? Kindly advise him and pray for his mum. Let love leads

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by rolams(m): 9:58am On Apr 10, 2016
It will b better if u can find your way out of the house. But if no way, u need to be patient and always stand firm on ur decision
Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by Ioannes(m): 10:00am On Apr 10, 2016
your mom May need psychological help. I'm not saying this ad an insult. I'd wanted to say psychiatric evaluation, but I know you May take it the wrong way.

whatever the case, she really needs help. it's not normal to see enemies, witches and wizards everywhere.

unfortunately "churches" like Mountain of Fire have so indoctrinated their members so much that they believe even cobwebs created on the ceiling by spiders are manifestations of evil ones.

you can't live your life like that, unless you want to have a psychotic/nervous breakdown.

you need to get out of that house as soon as you can.

talk to your dad. he needs to take his Catholic faith more important if just to counter his wife's fanaticism.

I'm sure there are Catholic priests who will take your case seriously if you approach them.

best wishes to you and your family.

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by Mintayo(m): 10:01am On Apr 10, 2016
livebullet:

@op this one is ur mother's kind ..."spirit filled" abeg which kind spirit. Shey na Aromatic schnapp or ogogoro?
People like you are blind. I don't have anything else to say to you.
Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by akike: 10:01am On Apr 10, 2016
mctowel01, there is nothing yoiu can do.

I meant no offence but your mum has mental issues, we all have ours however hers is a bit extreme. I understand you have been firm with but i think you need to change your approach. Stop arguing or talking to her on the matter. Let her speak, listen and when she is done, smile, leave or move away. Trust me,. it works. It stops you from getting too mad or upsetting her too. You have been doing all that. also you need to work on tuning her out when she starts.

I assume you will be married sometime in future. Please, do not let your wife disrespect your mum, do not let your mum disrespect your wife. make it a point to be available whenever your mum is close to the family. And do not let your mum and wife get close no matter what.


This is your cross, you must bear it.

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by cynosure489: 10:02am On Apr 10, 2016
asalimpo:

Your conversion isnt complete but move a lil closer to God from idols (mary and the sun wafer - see ya a jack chick comic near you or visit chick.com to know the frying pan you are in ).

How are you different from ops mother?

@OP The God i thank on your behalf is that you will soon have one full year of rest(NYSC). That said, no matter how small what you get is, you need to start looking at moving out of her house if not, most of the advice here will hold no water because of her wahala and your disposition before you loosr your cool one day and do as a certain guy has said up there. lol

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by flyca: 10:03am On Apr 10, 2016
You sound too intelligent to allow your mum manipulate. The time to stop her is NOW.
You need to take charge for yourself, your future and your younger ones.
I won't advice any further as you have received enough good advice already.

But I have a short story to tell:
My sister is like this paranoid to evil, but on a much lower scale. Her favorite phrase is : "Life is more spiritual than physical". I'm already doing my best to stop her already. One day, I was telling her about my cousin, a medical doctor, married with a kid. He went to do his housemanship in a private university that wasn't accredited. After about 7 months, he got a posting to a Federal University now, and had to move. As we were gisting, she said "Flyca, shey you know that Doc has had this kind of issue before, he wasted one year before when he wrote his first jamb that he had his no-accreditation issue and he had to leave the school plus all the money that was spent in that private school. Maybe he should start seeking spirit..... undecided". Immediately, I heard 'spiri....', I just cut her off and left! I don't entertain such tales angry

Religion twists people's mindset. Religion is a manipulative tool. Have you wondered why Nigeria is too religious yet one of the most morally bankrupt nation on the face of the Earth? Abeg make I stop.

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by solozo72(m): 10:03am On Apr 10, 2016
OP, Sorry to say but your mum is displaying clear signs of Paranoia! Its a Psychiatric issue that needs to be solved fast. My fear is that as she ages, she might slip from Paranoia to other more serious Psychiatric problem like Bipolar. Get her Psychiatric help ASAP!

One would be shocked at the high number of mental ailment in our society, cause Mental ailments in Nigeria are often misunderstood, allowed to linger for long and or cloaked with the toga of religion or culture. Get help for your mother fast and may the Force be with you.

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by theEYe21: 10:03am On Apr 10, 2016
She go agree? She will say the psychologist is evil.
Contrabanned:
@Op sorry but I think you should book your Mum an appointment with a psychologist. Many of what she might be thinking might be a result of the poor state of mind instilled in her by the teachings of where she worships.

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by lawrenzooo: 10:09am On Apr 10, 2016
Unfortunately I find myself in same situation. Am the only child of my parent and my mum believe aside me and her mum every other person is evil and that every other person in the world is out to hurt her family (husband and son). They get driven to a point by this so called prayer houses where they are meant to believe that everybody is a witch and out to harm them. In my own case it was so unfortunate that I was mostly away and by the time I returned my mum was standing on the line between sanity and insanity. So I had to make her choose between me and her church and at first she choosed her church so I took my bag and left home after three weeks she called me that I should come home that she is ready to change her church. When I got home I discovered she had lost some part of her memory as she could no more call things by their name rather she describe them like if she wants to called Maggi or salt she would say that thing they use in cooking. We had to go see a doctor and on the first day her BP was reading 210/140 with time it came down and the doctor referred us to see a psychiatrist and it's been some time now and with the help of God as much prayer has been going on and the help of doctors gradually she is regaining her self.

So brother the first thing is u have to find a way to make ur mom leave that church else she would be driven to a point of insanity because even if u become independent and leave home when things get worst everyone would dessert her and u would be forced to come look after ur mom. There after seek the help of a clinical psychologist or psychiatric while you intensify prayers am sure nothing is beyond God. Wishing you all the best. Less I forget the best time to act is now that u are at home.

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by tigonana: 10:15am On Apr 10, 2016
Omo dis kind of woman go dey easy to collect money from,quickly make I go disguise as pastor go tell ur mom say I see vision abt u,I know say she go drop chaa.

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by bxcode(m): 10:21am On Apr 10, 2016
Your mum is not your problem sir, your problem is that both yourself and your mum lacks knowledge of what being a true chritian is all about, religion had fed you guys deception, confusion and strife. Claiming to be a follower of Christ and yet living your life solely based on prophesy from a man is bound to backfire at a point, no matter who that man of God is, because Christ warned us in the scriptures that perverted truth and deception will prevail in our time. Your mum simply indulges on the type of religion that sees people as the cause of their problem and it's one of the deadliest religious doctrine because it makes one not to be in love with others around him. It is contrary to what Jesus told his disciples in the scriptures about loving and praying for those that persecute us.
The solution to this is to seek God's face in spirit and in truth, your bible is God's ultimate word that dosent favor any religion. It will show you deep things you need to know and will reveal the gospel truth to you and equip you to confront any obstacle if only you can pick it up and read. I can guarantee you that anything you try to do physically over this matter will only worsen the situation because it's entirely spiritual. Look for a bible teaching church around you and prayerfully ask God to reveal himself to you. This is a chance for you to step into your rightful position as God's soldier. But you have to decide, complaints and running away won't solve one bit of the problem. You have to work on yourself first before handling your mum's case and your dad's issue to. Am not saying you should become spiritual or religious, just ask God to reveal himself and the truth to you in humility and he will show up. Only the truth will set you free on this matter.
I will be praying for you and your family.

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by teemy(m): 10:24am On Apr 10, 2016
mctowel01 play the religious card. the two of you should hold bible study and from scriptures say the 4 gospels let her see where jesus' teachings do not align with that of the prayer house and false prophets. let her decide which preacher is higher.
Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by homesteady(m): 10:25am On Apr 10, 2016
mctowel01
Wow! I really understand your story! I'm in your age bracket, and I can't imagine myself standing up to my parents!
The only peaceful solution is for you to keep on trying to make her see reasons with you! You can do it in a funny way!

Ask her this question -
Mum, you always call everybody our enemy, so most of the people would also see us as their enemy! As we are praying for our enemies to die, they are also praying for their enemies to die! Why are we all not dead yet?

Wait a while, then interject - (don't allow her to answer)
Simple! Because God does not answer this kind of prayers! How do I know such? because God clearly states in the Bible that we should love our neighbors, we should forgive 77*7 times and Vengeance is of the lord(Mark 12:31,Mathew 18:22 and Romans 12:9)

Find more creative ways to do it!
You have to resolve this issue now or you won't find it as easy as you are getting it now later in the future when you are married! You might even run mad!

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by freecocoa(f): 10:32am On Apr 10, 2016
O boy.

This one don pass be careful.

Dude you are no longer a child, be firm in your decision, highest she can do is fast/pray that all the demons and people from all areas pursuing you will leave you be.

Stop joining her in her prayers, it's not by force.

I have simply told my family to respect my stance on religious issues, sometimes when I visit and it seems to mean so much to them that I sit with them when they pray, I tell them not to ask me to say any prayers as I won't, most times I don't even come out for prayers, neither do I join them for church service and we are cool.

Just be firm but you don't necessarily have to tell her you don't believe in god( make she no get heart attack) and in time, your ma will get the message.

But na wa o, your mum needs a doctor o, jokes apart.

1 Like

Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by flintoo(m): 10:33am On Apr 10, 2016
Your mum is schizophrenic.. Just like most Africans. It's a mental disorder Sha.

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by justchill(m): 10:33am On Apr 10, 2016
@OP As I read through your story I had the picture of my step mum, she is just an exact of all you have written here. Infact I and my elder sister had suffered so much in the hands of my step mother because of her beliefs her own case is even worse cos she went diabolical and succeeded in hypnotising my dad into believing and submitting to her wish.

My advie to you is that you are a grown man and you are responsible for how you live your life.
Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by lebienconnu: 10:35am On Apr 10, 2016
@op, your mum is not to blame.

We should blame the so called pastors who plant the seed of hatred in people's heart instead of love. Women, generally, are more gullible and these pastors thrive on this weak point.

When some xtians pray they practically curse throughout the prayer session. They curse all their imaginary enemies and mostly forget to pray for themselves. They ask the Lord to strike their "enemies" by thunder or by fire. Whereas, the great teacher taught us otherwise. I believe things will start getting better when xtians start imbibing the essence of Christ.

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by AyamConfidence(m): 10:37am On Apr 10, 2016
Phew...i cant believe i read all that sermon

back to the matter

What are you still doing in your mother's house at over 20? Just park your thimgs one day and move out...sorry to say this but i think she needs sessions with a shrink cos when something becomes an obsession, it is a form of madness...i'm sorry bro

thats why i hate these Aladura churches...they see visions from the demons that put quarels between family members.....you and your popsie should leave the house for her and move out...she'll realise herself

1 Like

Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by Richy4(m): 10:38am On Apr 10, 2016
This is just like the case of Bokoharam. Everyone is evil execept they and their members...
Your mum is terrorizing you and the rest of your family. The only difference between her and Boko was that she wasn't killing anyone

The solution to your problem is relocation. As soon as u relocate to another state, U will be fine.... The only contact will be on phone only
But what ever u do, do not abandon your family. always call and check up on them. but to have your sanity back, u really need to relocate ASAP

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Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by missKiffy(f): 10:41am On Apr 10, 2016
What church does ur mum attend? mctowel01
Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by mctowel01: 10:41am On Apr 10, 2016
iPopAlomo:



I'm not saying she is... but see how quick you defended her... in essence... you're not ready to break free from whatever she is doing... She called other people witches... you didnt defend them... but when she was called one... you reacted...

Life... lol... nothing is serious...
My mother is not a witch and i dont believe the people she calls evil are into witchcraft. I try to make her understand, but like i said, she has made it clear that she won't stop till she dies. Like its a life purpose.
Re: Religion Is Causing Tension Between Me And My Mum! Please Advice Me by mctowel01: 10:43am On Apr 10, 2016
sirnature:
@ OP I think I know ds church ur mum has be attending(ACPPB) ekpele ufuma
Yes, madness church. Thank God i ve finally seen someone who knows about it. How did you get to know about it?

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