I'll try to make long story short. Hub and I were separated quite a few yrs, last year he moved back.. Was back for a month then out of the blue got accepted in university back where he was living 10 hrs away.. I gave him my support, as this was a good opportunity. So he moved back. In this time he has visited a few times, but sometimes I wonder if this reconciliation and holding on is worth the effort. Just had Mother's Day and my bday, no card no nothing. Rather he was in court rearranging support payments for the kids cuz he can't afford to pay that since he's in school.
I told him I felt like I was a plant whithering away in the desert with no affection, and his advice to me is to pursue a career to feel fulfilled.
He also figures once he's done school we will gladly jump up and follow him anywhere his work leads him. My parents are aging, myself and the two children are very settled finally, and must I prepare myself to follow him for the third time? ( twice I moved back to my parents when my $ ran out)
Once he's graduated from the program, I am sure he will find a well paying job and $ shouldn't be an issue.
But my heart seems reluctant, I shy away from commiting and promises about moving anywhere..
What would you do in my shoes?

Talk things over with him first. outcome if you had done that before, Have a heart to heart talk with him again and let us know the outcome. Then we will be able to advice you based on the outcome

what was the cause of your seperation?
because i see no reason from your write up why u shouldn't support him.

hubby not sending u cards and bday gifts may be as a result of over familiarity, that is really nothing to worry about, u are a women though, that make u see things differently...

So why don't you follow your husband's advice by pursuing a career? Why don't you make something of your life especially now that your husband is a student and obviously will pay less in child support? You mentioned that twice you had to move back to your parent's home. Getting a good job will make you fully independent and make you feel better about yourself.

He couldnt remember it was ur birthday ?mothers day too!, most men [like him and i] are virtually the same o!, me cant remember my own birthday talk less of madam!,pls no vex o, has he always been like this?, how old are you guys sef?have you been academically stagnan?,have you kinda loose your beauty ever since uncle left?pls permit me to say this ma'am, you seem to be the nagging and a'troublesome' type,may be thats one of the reason uncle seem to be running away from your collabo.he seem not to be ready for another round of tongue bashing, nagging and financial austerity in the familly.{pls qoute me if i am wrong}but with full gist of the story line and not half backed one o!

Trust me, I'm not the nagging obnoxious wife.. I am quiet, usually very easy going and calm.. I do cleaning for others to support myself, and have also cared for elderly people in their homes.
I had to return twice to my parents because hub didn't provide and hold steady job and the money I made ran out, I was sick n preg so he brought me back to my parents..

As far as lose my beauty? that's funny!
I'm not a beauty queen but have kept myself in shape after 2 kids..
Physical attractiveness or age isn't an issue, he's 40 I'm 34..

MAaaaam with all due respect how is this different from the several other times you have complained of the same issue and received advise?

Thanks for the poster above, i was so sure i have gone through a similar thread on nairaland..... Attention seeking moffo