1. There’s the annoying dude who. always wants to take the place of the driver, he turns himself into “a co-driver”. oya cut enter here… take ur shape left… oga trafficate na. no let that car overtake you oo.  Me:niccur please, can you even ride a bike!
 

2. There’s the aunty who always ruins our noses with the foul smell that emits from the meat she bought since morning and kept in her shop. She turns the bus into an abattoir. I don’t even know if she’s trying to make our mouth water from the “nice aroma” or she wants to show that nobody in the bus can afford meat in their houses.  Me: Aunty na wa for you oh, you no go like trek go your house with this dead body u carry wey u call meat.
 

3. There is the clique of girls. They giggle at each other like docks. They pass their phones to one another other and laugh like idiots for no apparent reason. I always have a feeling they are those girls you find at those bend down select markets pricing a top for N30… me: shioo, iranu!
 

 

4. There are those who will board the bus with 100 even when they clearly hear the conductor say 300. You see them nodding their heads like a frog gasping for breath….conductor abeg help me collect am, abeg no vex. Na beg I dey beg you. Heheh…..trust our Lagos conductors, they will tell you the history of your great grandfathers down to you.. they’ve got no chill.
 

5. There’s the lady who will beg you for N50 in queens English to complete her t’fare. She’ll first ransack her bag, making a loud noise in the process to draw your attention. Next thing you hear is……hi, huh, ah was wondering if you coulda…huh..help me with 50bucks yeah. Ah totally left my purse with my money in’t ah home and stuff. Me: Ehn ehn….so your father can send you to England, but he couldn’t afford you a car not to talk of giving you enough transport fare…oya take…let me help your life.
 

 

6. There is the bros who is always throwing dry jokes, I mean the driest of jokes at everything. And you know the funny part, he laughs at those annoying jokes and looks at other passengers faces. He’ll  say something like……”conductor, buhari don come now, you no wan gimme my change abi. No let buhari change affect my change ooo…..bwahahaha”  tf is that! . me: niccur please, ah, you dry as f*****K.


7. There’s the man who is always refusing to collect 20million naira from his customer over the phone…..bia nwaane…I kant collect 20million neyra from you oo…the last I kandu for you is 25million neyra. Ok….send it to my akkant …yes…not the first bank, mba…not the uba…..send to the zeynit akkant. Me: really man…20million and you no get ur own car. Ok.no wahala.

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Source: http://www.naijasinglegirl.com/people-i-encounter-in-a-commercial-bus-everyday/