Samakus:
I'm still single. Married people please advise him.


My own advice is that you should work on your grammar. Very important!

gemini35:
i,was dating a girl of 24,and she is always talking about marriage,i decided to let my people know,they asked were she hail from i explained ,,and every body rejected her,reason my uncle married from that side,which i knew,she divided the family,,and sowed a seed of discord,as i,m talking my grand mother died the woman could not allow my uncle to attend the burial from usa,so the hatred was much,,i,told the girl that my people will not support our marriage,she asked me if she is going to live with my people,some times i beat her because she is sturbon and domineering,,i even asked her to live my house she said i,m the one to live the house for her,she eventually got pregnant,,and born baby girl,my uncle personally put a call to the parents,that i will not marry from their side,,then she was with her parent,,after six months with her parents,they still sent her to my house as if marriage is by force ,,,this girl came back to my house,i,could not send her away because of the baby,i,left her gradually she lured me to start making love to her and now she is pregnant and refuse to abort it,the parents are now inviting me so we can discuss,i,m traped in the middle,how do i handle this matter i need an advice from matured men,in the house,one the people that are suppose follow me to go and pay are against the marriage,and the the first baby is still in the curstody of her parents,and the way i see the girl she like,s to be in charge,should i ignore my people and go ahead and marry her she might also bring discord in our family,i,need not only advice but spiritual guide line,on the step to follow,i,m just like a prodigal son to my peoples ,every body is puting blame on me and i acept my mistake.and flaws.

gemini35:
i,was dating a girl of 24,and she is always talking about marriage,i decided to let my people know,they asked were she hail from i explained ,,and every body rejected her,reason my uncle married from that side,which i knew,she divided the family,,and sowed a seed of discord,as i,m talking my grand mother died the woman could not allow my uncle to attend the burial from usa,so the hatred was much,,i,told the girl that my people will not support our marriage,she asked me if she is going to live with my people,some times i beat her because she is sturbon and domineering,,i even asked her to live my house she said i,m the one to live the house for her,she eventually got pregnant,,and born baby girl,my uncle personally put a call to the parents,that i will not marry from their side,,then she was with her parent,,after six months with her parents,they still sent her to my house as if marriage is by force ,,,this girl came back to my house,i,could not send her away because of the baby,i,left her gradually she lured me to start making love to her and now she is pregnant and refuse to abort it,the parents are now inviting me so we can discuss,i,m traped in the middle,how do i handle this matter i need an advice from matured men,in the house,one the people that are suppose follow me to go and pay are against the marriage,and the the first baby is still in the curstody of her parents,and the way i see the girl she like,s to be in charge,should i ignore my people and go ahead and marry her she might also bring discord in our family,i,need not only advice but spiritual guide line,on the step to follow,i,m just like a prodigal son to my peoples ,every body is puting blame on me and i acept my mistake.and flaws.

gemini35:
i,was dating a girl of 24,and she is always talking about marriage,i decided to let my people know,they asked were she hail from i explained ,,and every body rejected her,reason my uncle married from that side,which i knew,she divided the family,,and sowed a seed of discord,as i,m talking my grand mother died the woman could not allow my uncle to attend the burial from usa,so the hatred was much,,i,told the girl that my people will not support our marriage,she asked me if she is going to live with my people,some times i beat her because she is sturbon and domineering [/b] even asked her to live my house she said i,m the one to live the house for her,she eventually got pregnant,,and born baby girl,my uncle personally put a call to the parents,that i will not marry from their side,,then she was with her parent,,after six months with her parents,they still sent her to my house as if marriage is by force ,,,this girl came back to my house,i,could not send her away because of the baby,i,left her gradually she lured me to start making love to her and now she is pregnant and refuse to abort it,the parents are now inviting me so we can discuss,i,m traped in the middle,how do i handle this matter i need an advice from matured men,in the house,one the people that are suppose follow me to go and pay are against the marriage,and the the first baby is still in the curstody of her parents,and the way i see the girl she like,s to be in charge,should i ignore my people and go ahead and marry her she might also bring discord in our family[b],i,need not only advice but spiritual guide line[/b],on the step to follow,i,m just like a prodigal son to my peoples ,every body is puting blame on me and i acept my mistake.and flaws.

gemini35:
i,was dating a girl of 24,and she is always talking about marriage,i decided to let my people know,they asked were she hail from i explained ,,and every body rejected her,reason my uncle married from that side,which i knew,she divided the family,,and sowed a seed of discord,as i,m talking my grand mother died the woman could not allow my uncle to attend the burial from usa,so the hatred was much,,i,told the girl that my people will not support our marriage,she asked me if she is going to live with my people,some times i beat her because she is sturbon and domineering,,i even asked her to live my house she said i,m the one to live the house for her,she eventually got pregnant,,and born baby girl,my uncle personally put a call to the parents,that i will not marry from their side,,then she was with her parent,,after six months with her parents,they still sent her to my house as if marriage is by force ,,,this girl came back to my house,i,could not send her away because of the baby,i,left her gradually she lured me to start making love to her and now she is pregnant and refuse to abort it,the parents are now inviting me so we can discuss,i,m traped in the middle,how do i handle this matter i need an advice from matured men,in the house,one the people that are suppose follow me to go and pay are against the marriage,and the the first baby is still in the curstody of her parents,and the way i see the girl she like,s to be in charge,should i ignore my people and go ahead and marry her she might also bring discord in our family,i,need not only advice but spiritual guide line,on the step to follow,i,m just like a prodigal son to my peoples ,every body is puting blame on me and i acept my mistake.and flaws.

5minsmadness:


First thing you should know is that you are not looking for someone to discourage you from marrying the girl. You have had enough advice from your parents and relatives but instead of using that as a solid excuse to keep her out you let her be forced on you in your house this leading to another impregnation. Even the people that want to escort u to pay bride price are against the marriage but somehow u have convinced them to follow u. Op I put it to you that you like this girl, the only issue is that she is coming with too much wahala.

We all have crosses in our lives we have to bear. Crosses are not necessarily a bad thing, they mould character and make you a stronger, better, more patient person if u carry them well. This woman is your cross. You have two children from her (she won't abort this pregnancy either) and she has stayed with you for a while. What you are looking for is how to weather the storm of the marriage u are about to enter.

First of all, realise this lady is desperate to marry you else she would have run since from the beatings and ill treatment. She is more determined to marry you than you her, hence you have an advantage.

So start laying your boundaries without fear. Let her know the things you can and cannot tolerate. The things u like and the things you don't like. If she crosses those lines then deal with her severely. I have never advised anyone to beat a woman, far from it, but unfortunately you two have a rapport of fighting already and if with all the pummelling u have given her she still struggles to have her way then just talking won't do the trick here. I suggest u use more mature though still physical ways to punish her since this is the language both of u are used to, and let her learn u are the master of the house. I recommend holding her down and spanking her hard on her buttocks with the palm of your hands. It works for children, it will work for her. Do not strike her anywhere else and do not use ur fists. Spank her until she is tired and subdued then tell her the reason for your actions and that she shouldn't repeat out again. You will do this for a while until her stubbornness calms down a bit, then gradually you will move to sorting your issues out without physically fighting. This may sound bizzaire to some people but Op your case is not the normal type and needs some strong-arming.


Secondly, as soon as you guys are married try and move away from both families. They both have some venom between each other already and I assure u it will spill into your marriage if both of u continue to associate closely with them. Your elder has had a bad experience from that family in the past and will see everything the woman does through tainted glasses and bias. He will be the first to shout "didn't I tell you not to marry her " etc. Her own family that is forcing her on you are not any better. Find a way to move far from them and be the master of your own household.

Finally I strongly believe u like this woman and with time you will grow to love her and the kids, but you both have to find your own rhythm, your own way of doing things. Marriage has a way of calming women down, her attitude will definitely improve especially when she realises that you are ready to take charge like the man you are. You on the other hand should learn to not only like but love your wife. See her as your wayward daughter sort of. Anything u plan on doing in the future, do it with her benefit in mind even though she may not agree with some. I assure u she will see these acts of love and will not want to let u go. Stop being a coward and take responsibility for the kids. They are the fruit of your loins. Do your job and protect them and make sure they get the best out of life. I would advice u against having more kids until u can financially cater for the ones on ground now. There is something called condom. I insist u use it for your own good.

Finally finally, get to know Christ. Find a church that both of you will attend. I strongly suggest an orthodox church (Catholic, Anglican) as they seem more responsible than the new age churches we have today. I will also suggest Redeemed and Winners as they are matured as well. Others may disagree with this last point. They have a right to do so.

Even before u find a church, develop the habit of praying with your wife and kids. Pray aloud positive blessings for her to her hearing and let her do the same for u. Inculcate this habit into your daily lives. You will see that it will bring a deeper level of understanding between you two and keep you closer together.

That is my advice.
All the best.

LMAO

Werey reee ooo
LOL

jaybee3:
How does one even go about advising a violent, insensitive, timid and above all directionless worthless thing parading himself as a man?

Buhahahahahahahaaaaaa

carmag:
that poster above...... hehehe!! shey na every body go be master of English? as long as u understand wetin he yaan..shoo!!!.. this place no be English class abeg..

back to topic ..

@ op..the time wey u dey nack the kpekus..they enjoy all the ingredients wey follow..am come... they chop and clean mouth

if the first child na by mistake,... you wan still tell us say the second pregi na also mistake..huh

your plan na just to make..am baby mama with the excuse that your relatives didn't approve her

so na who go come marry..am after she done drop two kids for you. as your plan na to look for another fresh one as a wife...

then the other one automatically became your baby mama

hmm there's God..oh.

if another guy should Repeat same to your sister i believe you won't find it funny