[size=15pt]Welcome!!! [/size] 


Laugh but don't fart 


Sylve was dying.

His wife sat at the bedside.

He looked up and said weakly, "I have something I must confess."
"There's no need to," his wife replied.

"No," he insisted, "I want to die in peace. I slept with you, r sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!"

"I know, I know," she replied. "Now just rest and let the poison work"

Laff those wrinkles out here

Nigeria’s President Umaru Yar'Adua has continually been criticized and often called a weak President by Nigerians in and outside the country. Yesterday, the President could
not take this accusation anymore and decided to diffuse this accusation.

Here is what the President had to say in his prime time
address:

Fellow Nigerians, I, President Umaru Yar'Adua,
have for months been called a weak President.
Let me tell you Nigerians, I am not weak as you all think! I am doing
something for Nigerians.
Yesterday for example, I managed to attend my village wrestling competition in Katsina State. My fellow Nigerians, a President who does all these, is he a weak President?

no be me talk am o

Returning back from his bricklayer’s job, James asked his wife Mary, how her day went!

Mary smilingly replied, "darling! Today is just one of those very busy days.
I worked so hard here at home that I never had any time for breakfast and lunch.

On hearing his wife’s busy day story, James quietly asked Mary what she actually did.

"Ooh darling! What a busy day, I slept so long and sound as never before! I shaved my legs and armpit until nothing was left! " 

"I also Watched for us our favourite series "Good and Bad times”! Sat on the toilet tub, thinking about youth! Took the dogs out for a long walk. Darling, that’s a lot for one day na"

erm. .erm. .I think so, James said. Did you do shopping for dinner also?

"No, no, darling, I left that one for you. It was a very busy day."

Lisa needs brain surgery and figures its easier to buy a new brain. She asks the doctor what he has on sale.

"Well you're luckY I have two in stock" said the doctor, "a man's brain for $1000, and a woman's for $100."

Surprised! she asks why the price difference?

"Generally," the doctor said, "women's brain run cheaper because they come to us used!"

Jojo and Jaja were trying to light a match.

He struck the first one and it didn’t work, so he threw it away.

He struck the second match. That didn’t work either, so he tossed it.

Jojo struck the third one and it lit up.

“That’s a good one!” he said, blowing it out. “I'm gonna save it!”



ewu

Man: Doctor, for the last 2 weeks my wife has thought that she is a rabbit.

Doctor: Ok, bring her in and I’ll try to help.

Man: Fine, but whatever you do, don’t cure her, I love her when she is a rabbit.

smal smal

A young woman said to her doctor, "You have to help me, I hurt all over."

"What do you mean?" said the doctor.

The woman touched her right knee with her index finger and yelled, "Ow, that hurts." Then she touched her left cheek and again yelled, "Ouch! That hurts, too." Then she touched her right earlobe. "Ow, even THAT hurts."

The doctor asked the woman, "Are you a natural blonde?"

"Why? yes" she said.

"I thought so," said the doctor,  "You have a sprained finger."

romsky:

wen u no chop winch sh!t

winch sh!t no get taste na

dani1luv:

You try

just wanna get busie

you wey be okro seller for day and security for night

@topic

u sed laff but dont fart, y is dat Is Fartin illegal here??

It's not allowed cos no money for air fresheners

Not bad.

Chi, farting is not allowed.
Crazy, wetin happen to u

Jesus and Satan have a discussion as to who is the better programmer. This goes on for a few hours until they come to an agreement to hold a contest, with God as the judge.

They sat themselves at their computers and begin. They type furiously, lines of code streaming up the screen, for several hours straight. Seconds before the end of the
competition, a bolt of lightning strikes, taking out the electricity. Moments later, the power is restored, and God announces that the contest is over.

He asks Satan to show what he has come up with. Satan is visibly upset, and cries, “I have nothing. I lost it all when the power went out.”

“Very well, then,” says God, “let us see if Jesus fared any better.”

Jesus enters a command, and the screen comes to life in vivid display, the voices of an angelic choir pour forth from the speakers. Satan is astonished.

He stutters, “B-b-but how? I lost everything, yet Jesus’ program is intact. How did he do it?”

God smiled all-knowingly, “Jesus saves.”

no be you be our CEO?

Oga! i no fit c u in ya office nw o, i dey busy wit some stuff hia.

what other stuffs can u be busy with if not the long tin of crazykid or by.dot

are they nt worth to b busy wit

dis thread is for romsky and benny

**meet tyty on her way out** is dat y u're leaving d thread?

singing **i am from new york, concrete jungle where dreams are made of,
there is nuthin u cant do
and this streets will make me feel brand new**

lafs

stp laffing nw u're too old 4dat

Titi smile nw

cheese