If ever there was a creation, an entity, so profoundly pointless in its existence, it is Nigeria. If I could have a conversation with God I would ask him a bunch of questions, one of which would be: what were you thinking when you created Nigeria? As one with a perennially pessimistic view on religion and all things ‘God’, I doubt this day would ever come. But that is fodder for another rant. What saddles my mind, at the moment, with helpless wonderment is this clusterfuck referred to as ‘Nigeria’. Ever so often, when one finds himself in a little study, surfing the web, in the heart of middle England, sometime after 7 pm, after a hard day at work, and one is considering joining the Liberal Democrats, thoughts of one’s native land may drift into one’s head and the notion that one is, in fact, Nigerian, hits one with the ferocious bluntness that only fact can.

What would drive a man to forget that he is Nigerian? An answer can be drawn from an African adage which says something about people only claiming that which is good. You see, I was born in Lagos. I remember going to private schools on the Mainland. Good times. Good times because my family was fortunate enough to be able to afford the good things that could be enjoyed in an environment as rusty as Lagos. Some years -- an urban British accent, two degrees and a foreign citizenship -- later, the reality that one is, always will be, Nigerian begins to tug at one’s heartstrings like the cursed fingers of a maniacal guitarist and then you think about your fatherland, but you can only shake your head in pity.

Why do Nigerians try to run away from Nigeria? Why do Nigerians, once abroad, attempt to shed all things Nigerian? Because a dark green passport does nothing but embarrass you. A land so blessed with natural resources -- resources that other countries would kill for -- still teeters at the edge of collective stupidity in a way that is simply unbelievable: the Attorney General of a country frolicking with indicted criminals and common thugs, a banking system that is effectively a systemic criminal operation, an educational system that is a joke, a road network that makes it easier to force a full grown camel through the eye of a needle in comparison to the mission that is getting from the Island to the Mainland, an energy framework that is not fit for purpose and, most of all, a President with absolutely no clue what his job description is. Indeed, the question should be: why should Nigerians not run away from Nigeria?

The identification of all these problems, deluded ‘patriots’ contest, should not be the end of the analysis. You need to propose solutions, they cry. But reality has little patience for rhetoric. One cannot solve a problem that is incomprehensible. It is impossible to answer the question: what is ‘A’ multiplied by ‘B’ divided by ‘25’ because it does not make sense. Just as the entity referred to as Nigeria is incomprehensible to the analytical mind. To put it simply: Nigeria is a senseless equation, an imbecilic nation pushing fifty.

What is to be done? Burn down this whole place and start from the scratch. That’s what a patriot would do.

Oh my word!!!! roflmao!!!

Naija = joke.

Imbecilic nation pushing 50

Chai Jakumo will be envious

Anyway lonewolf God dey

It’s as if, collectively, the country is determined to be stuck on stupid. Things cannot go on like this. This is not a sustainable arrangement.

so what are u advocating?^^^

Burn down the whole place.

I don't think we need to profer more solutions here, and we certainly do not need to turn this into yet another "divide and go our own way" thread. We need to wake up and actually do something, anything, for once.

I think that people have to collectively stand up and say, "enough". Then we can go from there. Organise, etc. But this, as it stands at the moment, is the highway to hell.

I like the summary description of the nation called Nigeria by lonewolf. I have often wondered myself how this country developed another spirit that is so different from other beings. It looks to me that nigeria has defied all solutions and i believe that even the heavens marvel at the way we even survive. How on earth has this country remained one despite all the provocation from our leaders? has the soul of nigeria been sold? is nigeria destined to be a consistent 3rd world country? Even in africa we are the worst interms of government, interms of corruption, interms of out dated infrastructure. We have the worst leadership in human history. corruption is celebrated in Nigeria. leaders who loot the nation's treasury are given national honours, ex governors who looted their staes treasuries are flyin around in private jets. Tha banks? we all know!
This should be a point of concern for all Nigerins. Sometimes i wonder if Nigeria will get a second chance. Will God not judge us for mis-managing the natural resources He gave us? I think he will judge us.

Gadols:

I like the summary description of the nation called Nigeria by lonewolf. I have often wondered myself how this country developed another spirit that is so different from other beings. [size=14pt]It looks to me that nigeria has defied all solutions [/size] and i believe that even the heavens marvel at the way we even survive. How on earth has this country remained one despite all the provocation from our leaders? has the soul of nigeria been sold? is nigeria destined to be a consistent 3rd world country? Even in africa we are the worst interms of government, interms of corruption, interms of out dated infrastructure. We have the worst leadership in human history. corruption is celebrated in Nigeria. leaders who loot the nation's treasury are given national honours, ex governors who looted their staes treasuries are flyin around in private jets. Tha banks? we all know!
This should be a point of concern for all Nigerins. Sometimes i wonder if Nigeria will get a second chance. Will God not judge us for mis-managing the natural resources He gave us? I think he will judge us.

Ok! That is a great fallacy. How can a country defy all solutions when NO SOLUTION has ever been implemented in the right way in the history of that nation?

Nigeria is a shame but im sure within the future it will change cause it can't get any more worse.

and seperating the country and parting ways peacefully is unlikely - southerners have the most to lose.

sjeezy8:

[1]Nigeria is a shame but im sure within the future it will change cause it can't get any more worse.

[2]and seperating the country and parting ways peacefully is unlikely - [3]southerners have the most to lose.

1. LOL

2. Duh!

3. 

ezeagu:

1. LOL

2. Duh!

3.

southerners are the ones with the businesses, schools and hospitals that are likely to be destroyed the northerner never had shit duh!!!!!

There are only FEW NORTHERN ELITE

CLUSTERFUCK. . . Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

sjeezy8:

southerners are the ones with the businesses, schools and hospitals that are likely to be destroyed the northerner never had shit duh!!!!!

There are only FEW NORTHERN ELITE

In that case the redder the eyes get, the better. We will simply ramp up desert encroachment.

Beaf:

In that case the redder the eyes get, the better. We will simply ramp up desert encroachment.

Im still wondering how the destruction of the south will help the delta.

EFCC ought to be the starting point for Nigeria's cleansing.
What has it achieved since its creation? We had a man there
who by all standards tried to do what ought to be done.
He became s victim of that same institution.
Soludo came, tried some banking reforms, consolidated the industry.
What happened? The Bank MDs and their cohorts saw the masssive money
and we all know what the story is today.
At 50, we ar still being breast fed.
Nigeria is a shame simple put.

Gadols:

EFCC ought to be the starting point for Nigeria's cleansing.
What has it achieved since its creation? We had a man there
who by all standards tried to do what ought to be done.
He became s victim of that same institution.
Soludo came, tried some banking reforms, consolidated the industry.
What happened? The Bank MDs and their cohorts saw the masssive money
and we all know what the story is today.
At 50, we ar still being breast fed.
Nigeria is a shame simple put.

And so it shall be in the next 50 years!

^^^ god forbid

as theres no Biafra so shall it be never be in jesus name amen

sjeezy8:
^^^ god forbid

as theres no Biafra so shall it be never be in jesus name amen

12 years after... How far??!

chic2pimp:
AMEN,AMEN,AMEN,AMEN,AMEN,AMEN,AMEN,AMEN,AMEN and AMEN

12 years later?