VolTOxic:
A woman that can account for her spendings, doesn't contribute financially & wants collateral = gold digger. The man shouldn't oblige. If her name pop up on those papers, first thing next morning, will be a divorce paper.

shegxi:
a wife might not be earning but can still have great value.
in this particular case however, i think it is a case of a woman hoping to milk husband and leave him home and dry. u dn't earn and u are frivolous, what a disastrous combination

You've said it all.
By the way, we have been made to believe it's just Nigerian women that act like this, or maybe she is a Nigerian by birth .

PaperLace:


You've said it all.
By the way, we have been made to believe it's just Nigerian women that act like this, or maybe she is a Nigerian by birth .

5minsmadness:


Nah, nigeriansjust enjoy sensationalism.
Each nigerian gender claims that the other is the worst in the world, yet they won't stop marrying each other.



At op, gold-digger alert.
I wont be surprised if the wife is hiding a drug addiction habit.

5minsmadness:


Nah, nigerians just enjoy sensationalism.
Each nigerian gender claims that the other is the worst in the world, yet they won't stop marrying each other.



At op, gold-digger alert.
I wont be surprised if the wife is hiding a drug addiction habit.

VolTOxic:
A woman that can account for her spendings, doesn't contribute financially & wants collateral = gold digger. The man shouldn't oblige. If her name pop up on those papers, first thing next morning, will be a divorce paper.

5minsmadness:


Nah, nigerians just enjoy sensationalism.
Each nigerian gender claims that the other is the worst in the world, yet they won't stop marrying each other.



At op, gold-digger alert.
I wont be surprised if the wife is hiding a drug addiction habit.

bukatyne:


My thoughts too.

However, what kind of marriage do they have? Is there a silent understanding that husband is in charge of finance why wifey handles domestics?

missjo:
I don't think she should be spending money without care and still demanding her name appears on documents,it comes off as leeching.

TV01:

Two different issues. Spouses should always practice and be held to high levels of financial prudence. Property acquired during marriage - and in many cases even before - becomes marital or community property. The 2 issues are not mutually dependent or some how interwoven.

And it's wrong of the man to think of it as "his home". Its their home, or the family home. "Bachelor pad" mentality .


TV

5minsmadness:


Nah, nigerians just enjoy sensationalism.
Each nigerian gender claims that the other is the worst in the world, yet they won't stop marrying each other.



At op, gold-digger alert.
I wont be surprised if the wife is hiding a drug addiction habit.

missjo:

Did you read the article Sir?
Her careless spending habits and not contributing to the mortgage and tax especially as it is now community property AKA their home,and then her subsequent insistence on having her name on documents, is what infuriates the man as it should.

TV01:

I barely remember this thread and I certainly don't remember you! Anyway, now that we are better aquainted, I'll unignore you . I just felt you didn't get marriage. I'll explain by way of example;

If the couple had kids together, they'd be joint parents, father and mother. If the man didn't lift a finger to help (despite being able to do so, and his wife needing him to), it wouldn't mean that she should be designated sole parent. The issue is not parenthood, it's his parenting skills/invovement. Clear? No

Ok. lets say they rented and didn't own, would there be a problem still? Yes, she's financially scatty. She has a problem and they have an issue (or vice-versa if you prefer). Her financial impropriety needs to be be addressed.

So, her wanting to be named on the deeds is standard marriage protocol, nothing to do with her poor financial management/contribution. That is a separate issue entirely, although they may appear related to one who doesn't get it .

You are still doing girlfriend/boyfriendage abi? Get back to me when you grow up

Have a lovely evening


TV

merahki:



@ you and "a drug addiction habit" ....your submission was the reason I typed, "even if someone had a heroin-habit bla bla bla" in a previous thread. I see it is a thing for you.

missjo:

It's exactly 1month 18days since I quoted you without getting a response,and your excuse now is that you didnt respond because I don't get marriage, lol.

See like I told that other guy on that thread,you're terribly insecure. Here's how I know:

Lol,you're terrible. A woman wanting her name on the deeds was never the issue,this wouldn't be a problem with couples who are satisfied, content, and wholly committed to each other.

The issue with her insisting on having her name on the deed became a problem to her husband ONLY after he factored in her previous behavior. THEY ARE RELATED because she hasn't given him any reason to trust him.

...and you still don't get it. Whatever her behavior pre or post-marriage, having communal property (or property in common) is a feature of marriage, it's how its meant to work. It does not vary from couple to couple, based on feelings or concerns about behavior.

Even if she is a gold-digger, as his wife, she has every right to declare a marital interest. In fact, it is assumed even without documentation in some jurisdictions. Concerns about her financial mismanagement should have been addressed prior, and can be even now, but that does not obviate her rights...read slowly and less personally Oh, look! https://www.nairaland.com/3322866/wife-doesnt-work-wants-name#48984645

5minsmadness:


Eh?
What r u talking about?

TV01:

Missjo, please take it easy, I may be yanking your chain small, but the whole psyche bit is funny, as well as a fail.

I didn't respond the first time as I felt my first answer was clear and I didn't know you to back and forth with. Since you forcefully introduced yourself , I do now.

At first, I thought who is this? But quite respected your speaking up on the Moji thread, even though I yanked a little then. MizMyColi got it way better than you did.

Lighten up, you are taking things way to personally. I have nothing to be insecure about, and neither should you, from me at least.

Oya, re-do your make-up.

Have a great rest of day.


TV


<sup>...and you still don't get it. Whatever her behavior pre or post-marriage, having communal property (or property in common) is a feature of marriage, it's how its meant to work. It does not vary from couple to couple, based on feelings or concerns about behavior.

Even if she is a gold-digger, as his wife, she has every right to declare a marital interest. In fact, it is assumed even without documentation in some jurisdictions. Concerns about her financial mismanagement should have been addressed prior, and can be even now, but that does not obviate her rights...read slowly and less personally Oh, look! https://www.nairaland.com/3322866/wife-doesnt-work-wants-name#48984645</sup>

missjo:

Whatever Mr Man.

The summary of your position is that this man should and MUST NOT have negative feelings regarding his wife's behaviour. He ought to overlook everything she does as written in the article and continue like nothing is wrong. Splendid!

TV01:

They are both terrible, but I'm not sure which is actually worse, your reading comprehension or your reading of people - both are so poor I'm starting to suspect you're trolling me .

Marriage has a framework. It is not primarily determined by the "feelings" or even "behaviours" of those within it. Spouses have a claim to marital assets regardless. And as I repeatedly stated, her behaviour and his feelings about that behaviour, do not change that.

But lets just overlook the points I repeatedly stressed about addressing said behaviour (as a separate issue) - prior or post marriage - as it suits the caricature you have of me in your head .

Enough. This is getting boring. Please tell me what exactly it is I'm insecure about. I'm struggling . I'm no oil-painting, not rich by even generous measures and have a "standard education" from a non-name institutions.

But, I'm happily married to a stunning woman (all round 0 ). I have cute as button kids, a strong extended family network, a diverse, but select set of good friends. I'm in good health, as fit as a fiddle, have a place to call my own. And not least, have a strong faith to the core of me.

Please troll me some more elucidate your diagnosis of insecure for me - then I'll share my own diagnosis, and prognosis if you like, of you

Set your weave like it's box-fresh and you mean business

Have a lovely weekend


TV

merahki:



I dunno again
I must have mistaken you for someone else...on a help thread on here
The person suggested that the girl..., you know what? Now I am really confused...I think I mixed up threads
...apologies for the wrong quote

TV01:

They are both terrible, but I'm not sure which is actually worse, your reading comprehension or your reading of people - both are so poor I'm starting to suspect you're trolling me .

Marriage has a framework. It is not primarily determined by the "feelings" or even "behaviours" of those within it. Spouses have a claim to marital assets regardless. And as I repeatedly stated, her behaviour and his feelings about that behaviour, do not change that.

But lets just overlook the points I repeatedly stressed about addressing said behaviour (as a separate issue) - prior or post marriage - as it suits the caricature you have of me in your head .

Enough. This is getting boring. Please tell me what exactly it is I'm insecure about. I'm struggling . I'm no oil-painting, not rich by even generous measures and have a "standard education" from a non-name institutions.

But, I'm happily married to a stunning woman (all round 0 ). I have cute as button kids, a strong extended family network, a diverse, but select set of good friends. I'm in good health, as fit as a fiddle, have a place to call my own. And not least, have a strong faith to the core of me.

Please troll me some more elucidate your diagnosis of insecure for me - then I'll share my own diagnosis, and prognosis if you like, of you

Set your weave like it's box-fresh and you mean business

Have a lovely weekend


TV

Ishilove:

Kai, this man, your bad mouth no be here

luvablesam:
Every Man should know who he married as a wife. If a woman even ask such question a man should be worried(she's building up her exit plan already)

Richy4:
You guys should settle down and understand the cultural differences between Nigeria and USA .... U cannot judge this Article based on Nigerian context....
The lady has an ulterior motive behind what she was requesting... She is Delilah and she has a big scissors to cut this guy's hair....
Before you know it, she will file for a divorce and claim the whole thing....And I know how the law favors the ladies in US

missjo:



Do you have an opinion on the topic, or you only outcheaa to piggyback?

missjo:



You both probably don't understand marriage to have this opinion it seems,according to the boss TV01.

[b]You must be really pissed.... That's why I like Family section, there are lots of level headed people here who still give constructive argument no matter how much angry they seems without insult..... it is called maturity....Romance and political section does not have that... someone like me that cherish my respect, I hardly click that button except if it was on trending...

Back to the topic, I still believe marriage is based on cultural value... In Nigeria, for example the man sees himself as the head of the home..all financial stuffs is been provided by him...Most time we seek help from the female folks to pay bills and other things.... But in western world, it was an equal role, man and wife will iron it out based on how they want to run the family, who pays what etc.. that was why the man was practically complaining that the woman was not doing her own part .....

Most Nigerian ladies will not make that kind of request that the woman made except if the man willingly includes her on his own accord...that request will be a total red flag for any African man....But in western world the law favors the ladies a lot, so that is why most men are really careful...You might be surprised that if he includes her, she will start finding an excuse to end the relationship...,and that house will go to her because the law is always on their side....Though I still think if they have lived for more than a year together,during divorce they are entitled to an equal share of asset married or not... as long as they stay together... .[/b]

Richy4:


You must be really pissed.... That's why I like Family section, there are lots of level headed people here who still give constructive argument no matter how much angry they seems without insult..... it is called maturity....Romance and political section does not have that... someone like me that cherish my respect, I hardly click that button except if it was on trending...

.