Hi Nairalanders, (especially female orphans).

I am an orphan, lost boh parents before I clocked 19. I'm not close to many of my extended family members.

Now I'm set for my traditional marriage.

I am Yoruba, hubby is AkwaIbom. Though we've been together for years but most importantly my husband deems it most necessary cos it's tradition for us to do the traditional marriage.

The issue now is, MOST OF MY FAMILY MEMBERS are so unapproachable and super rich that they find it uncomfortable to attend my traditional marriage. Lots of them are based abroad but the few here are giving one excuse or the other for not been able to attend. Meanwhile my husband's family are coming all the way from AkwaIbom and Benin, just to attend my traditional wedding.

I've been so sad and worried at how I will be doing NY traditional marriage without anyone representing my late Mom. Only my Dad's family will be present cos they are the ones fully involved in the list preparation and planning of the engagement party.

I really don't know what to do.
Imagine a lot of other family members are even saying there's no big deal in the thing. I don't need to bother people.(Like seriously?) I'm not asking anyone for money, only thier PRESENCE and that seems to be more expensive for them to give (thier presence).

Please are there any married female orphans here on Nairaland? How did you cope during your time? Kindly share. Its really bothering me.

I personally don't see any big deal in Traditional Marriage though (quote me )....but it is your fault to wait until the 11th hour before you start buildin relationship with your xtended family or don't you think you were goin to need 'em (karma time)


My dear, since your intendin hubby wants a Traditional Marriage i don't think that there is another way around it (substitutin your family), just go and plead with your family "if need be" cox it seems they wanna shake you for abandonin 'em.

If you have sibblings,keep them very close and channel your love and energy towards your life partner to be .Remember to be 1000% sure he loves you and not your material things.With this ,you are good to go,once you start having your own children,the pain of orphanhood,will gradually vanish.

Dont expect much from anyone while preparing for your marriage,just get it done the smallest way you can and move on.

Hmmm....good question

Do you have a mother figure in your life? If yes, tell her you want her to be your mother on your day. No big deal.

I have stood in for a handful of ladies who were brought up in orphanage homes during their marriages. Heck, some people do it as business. If you are so bothered you can go to ikoyi registry and rent-a-mom with 3 or 4 aunts to boot. They will come in ashoebi of any colour, steal the show sef and everyone will be happy.

Babes pls don't give yourself headache. The traditional wedding is actually done in custom of the bride's , not the groom. Pls tell them you do not want a traditional wedding. Simple!

Just go to court with the few you could call your own and from there proceed to church. Don't go looking sad on the day because your extended family isn't there...or, finish everybody by doing a destination wedding. Lobatan! That way, even most of his people won't show up. Good luck in your marriage.

ifyalways:
Heck, some people do it as business. If you are so bothered you can go to ikoyi registry and rent-a-mom with 3 or 4 aunts to boot. They will come in ashoebi of any colour, steal the show sef and everyone will be happy.

The things you learn on Nairaland...

How do you even KNOW all this stuff

AyaSunday:
Hi Nairalanders, (especially female orphans).

I am an orphan, lost boh parents before I clocked 19. I'm not close to many of my extended family members.

Now I'm set for my traditional marriage.

I am Yoruba, hubby is AkwaIbom. Though we've been together for years but most importantly my husband deems it most necessary cos it's tradition for us to do the traditional marriage.

The issue now is, MOST OF MY FAMILY MEMBERS are so unapproachable and super rich that they find it uncomfortable to attend my traditional marriage. Lots of them are based abroad but the few here are giving one excuse or the other for not been able to attend. Meanwhile my husband's family are coming all the way from AkwaIbom and Benin, just to attend my traditional wedding.

I've been so sad and worried at how I will be doing NY traditional marriage without anyone representing my late Mom. Only my Dad's family will be present cos they are the ones fully involved in the list preparation and planning of the engagement party.

I really don't know what to do.
Imagine a lot of other family members are even saying there's no big deal in the thing. I don't need to bother people.(Like seriously?) I'm not asking anyone for money, only thier PRESENCE and that seems to be more expensive for them to give (thier presence).

Please are there any married female orphans here on Nairaland? How did you cope during your time? Kindly share. Its really bothering me.

why do I have a feeling that I have read this story before?

op,if u have a church,those ppl can stand in for u.since ur dad's family are even willing to come,u dont hv a prob.ur siblings+ church members+friends+DADS family,what else do u need?

Onegai:


The things you learn on Nairaland...

How do you even KNOW all this stuff

Lol

The streets of Lagos is the best teacher. You can rent a family(parents, siblings, aunts and uncles, nephews and nieces) or village for wedding, funeral, court case or trouble, it's all about the kudi.

ifyalways:

Lol

The streets of Lagos is the best teacher. You can rent a family(parents, siblings, aunts and uncles, nephews and nieces) or village for wedding, funeral, court case or trouble, it's all about the kudi.

Where are they hiring for this services at Abuja? Any idea will be welcomed Dis recession dey waya me bad, I need a side business with lots of merriment to booth.

TheArchangel:
Where are they hiring for this services at Abuja? Any idea will be welcomed Dis recession dey waya me bad, I need a side business with lots of merriment to booth.

Hehehehe. Dunno about Abuja oo. Y'all over there are too posh na but you can set up an agency ; package yourself well start with providing Ushers for bride's aso ebi.

ifyalways:

Hehehehe. Dunno about Abuja oo. Y'all over there are too posh na but you can set up an agency ; package yourself well start with providing Ushers for bride's aso ebi.

You are soooo funny. I will keep it in mind.

Come hire me, I go pack people come

Thanks to all for the responses. I was not really close to any of them 100% cos from the beginning my parents didnt really help in that regards. I'll just have to make do with the few that will attend. Thanks once again.