MY HUSBAND OF 9 YEARS HAS A TERRIBLE DRINKING PROBLEM. I LOVE HIM VERY MUCH BUT FOR THE PAST 5 YEARS HE HAS BEEN DOING THE DR JEKYLL MR HYDE THING ONE MINUTE HE IS LOVING AND CARING BUT AFTER A FEW DRINKS HE FLIPS THE SCRIPT AND HATES MY GUTS NOT ONLY IS HE VERBALLY ABUSIVE BUT IT HAS GOTTEN PHYSICAL AND ON MORE THAN 1 OCCASION MY CHILDREN HAVE WITNESSED THIS. THINGS ARE ALWAYS BLAMED ON THE ALCOHOL BUT I'M STARTING TO THINK OTHERWISE(MAYBE HE JUST DOESN'T CARE FOR ME ANYMORE). I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO HE WON'T GO TO COUNSELING OR TO CHURCH. HE ALWAYS TRY TO ARGUE WITH ME TO HAVE AN EXCUSE TO GET LIQUORED UP
AND I AM AT MY WITS END!!!!! SHOULD I LEAVE HIM OR CONTINUE TO SUPPORT HIM? ANY ADVICE WELCOMED

You need to keep him away from the children until he is ready to help himself. Does someone have to tell you this? He needs to leave that house until he comes to his senses. Alchohol is not an excuse for his behavior.

leave him

Leaving him is really not the best options right nw, but why not let ur folks and his have a family meeting whereby he will also be invited and you let them know the agony you are passing through, a man that lays his hands on a woman is a coward and taking to drinking is also not an excuse, ensure that the way forward is reached to a logical conclution by both families if not he might end up killing you one day, he has refuse seeing a councillor and also a pastor, thats why i suggest a family meeting.

You can also on your spare time think of when things started going wrong and see how you can make things right, the truth is that a woman is the one that makes most marriages work, TRY AND MAKE YOURS WORK, nothing God cannot perfect, WISH U GOD'S SPEED

If you are sure that talking to him hasn't worked, write him a detailed letter explaining to him how his drinking is affecting your relationship and that you believe that if there are underlying problems, you both need to sit down and talk about it.

I will advice you to run, cos one day, he will be so drunk to take the gun and practice it on your skulls, so run now while you have 2 legs to do so, and pls, make sure you take the kids with you.
Good luck

Fhemmmy:

I will advice you to run, cos one day, he will be so drunk to take the gun and practice it on your skulls, so run now while you have 2 legs to do so, and pls, make sure you take the kids with you.
Good luck

Funny, but scary to think that such and worse have happened.

Plz leave that lucifer !!!! but do you work ?

Report him to someone he truely respects, that way he will be ashamed and will certainly want to change.
On a second thought, take it to God in prayer. Somethings are spiritual and only through quiet prayers that we can overcome them.
Goodluck

Spyker:

Report him to someone he truely respects, that way he will be ashamed and will certainly want to change.
On a second thought, take it to God in prayer. Somethings are spiritual and only through quiet prayers that we can overcome them.
Goodluck

Report to someone?
This is violence and not a time to be doing some yeye report

Report to someone?
This is violence and not a time to be doing some yeye report,  take am easy now, e never reach that level yet

Leave as soon as possible. If things are escalating, and your kids are involved, you need to leave. There have been to many stories like this where the woman doesn't know when to get out and a few months later we read about the husband slaughtering her and the children. Please, think of you and most importantly your children.

thanks everyone for your posts****i decided to have a meeting with our families i hope that this is a big enough eye opener but if he decides not to seek help then the kids and i are g*o*n*e i love him very much but my safety as well as the our children is far more important than anything