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Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by Yewandequeen(f): 4:11pm On Nov 24, 2016
Yea right.
Cooking can be learnt but the other cannot be taught.

1 Like

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by profmallory(m): 4:14pm On Nov 24, 2016
men go to war when one arises, provide for the family and even when we boil inside society does permit us to display it. So is it too much to ask to have a wife that can cook good food, why is this our generation so disillusioned with this "free life style attidude" and its not an African thing, most women across the globe cook for their families.

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Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by Adiwana: 4:19pm On Nov 24, 2016
I cook well and very diverse when it comes to cooking but what's with Africans&trying to copy oyinbo people.Always trying to compare their lives with their Western counterparts. So far as African culture&Igbo culture where I come from its concerned, one of the attributes that makes you a good wife is your ability to prepare a good meal.Why on Earth will i marry a woman that cant cook?so I have a wife,then I go outside to eat?why did i pay her bride price in the first place?
I can do the cooking occasionally, depending on the situation, but to have a woman that cant cook/bad cook is entirely off the book.
To me a woman that cant cook has no where near my home&signifies poor upbringing from the mother&making a good wife,I doubt that
mehn,the African man is really losing it,I swear with this kind of mentality of the op

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by DanPel(m): 4:20pm On Nov 24, 2016
Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives,hmmm my op it makes o,we are in africa i can't accept dat. How far,ur quote is to long o.
Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by SirShymexx: 4:23pm On Nov 24, 2016
Lol, the simps on this forum and the uncanny way they pander to women reeks of desperation and a way to mask the fact that they aren't getting no play in the real world. And the internet is the last bastion for that. These nyggahs are frauds, yo.

If you're a woman and you can't cook - you need to slap yourself for being a failure in life. That is the most basic thing a woman needs to learn how to do. It isn't even for the man - it's the economics and being able to provide well cooked meals for your kids. If you can't cook, then your ability to be a good mother, is also questionable.

No amount of simp pandering in desperation by frauds can change that. Learn how to cook.

12 Likes

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by TheArchangel(f): 4:24pm On Nov 24, 2016
eezeribe:
What else is the function of a wife...
A man provides for everything in the home, some even pay salary to their wife, some wives even find it difficult to wash their husband's clothes.Some husbands even settle for dry cleaners or buy washing machine for their wife(which would also be of benefit to her).
Most husbands leave for work on empty stomach and come back late to meet cold food which has been grudgingly served by the wife or in most cases... The maid
Marriage is a woman's Asset and a Man's Liability
After paying so much as bride price and bearing the cost of the wedding which she made more expensive... At least the least he can get is a good food at home.No wonder the divorce rate keeps going up and Many single and Eligible people don't want marriage commitment.

WHAT DO HUSBANDS EVEN GAIN FROM WIVES
These are the functions of a maid/ house help.
God created women to be a companion to men.

6 Likes

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by freecocoa(f): 4:27pm On Nov 24, 2016
SirShymexx:
Lol, the simps on this forum and the uncanny way they pander to women reeks of desperation and a way to mask the fact that they aren't getting no play in the real world. And the internet is the last bastion for that. These nyggahs are frauds, yo.

If you're a woman and you can't cook - you need to slap yourself for being a failure in life. That is the most basic thing a woman needs to learn how to do. It isn't even for the man - it's the economics and being able to provide well cooked meals for your kids. If you can't cook, then your ability to be a good mother, is also questionable.

No amount of simp pandering in desperation by frauds can change that. Learn how to cook.
I think I agree with you on her ability to be a good mum being in question, if she can't cook, then again, every teenager should know how to cook, let alone adults.

2 Likes

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by Senorprinz(m): 4:30pm On Nov 24, 2016
i feel like hurting someone right now. undecided
Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by Empredboy(m): 4:30pm On Nov 24, 2016
For the past 5 years that i have been married and still counting i will say 3 things is what will make a woman GOOD
(1) she must be a good cook
(2) she must be good in bed
(3) she must be submissive and respectful to people.
Any lady who have it is lucky and any man who finds such woman is the luckiest of all.

3 Likes

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by seizethaBae(f): 4:32pm On Nov 24, 2016
The children we are 'borning' upandan nko? undecided

eezeribe:
What else is the function of a wife...
A man provides for everything in the home, some even pay salary to their wife, some wives even find it difficult to wash their husband's clothes.Some husbands even settle for dry cleaners or buy washing machine for their wife(which would also be of benefit to her).
Most husbands leave for work on empty stomach and come back late to meet cold food which has been grudgingly served by the wife or in most cases... The maid
Marriage is a woman's Asset and a Man's Liability
After paying so much as bride price and bearing the cost of the wedding which she made more expensive... At least the least he can get is a good food at home.No wonder the divorce rate keeps going up and Many single and Eligible people don't want marriage commitment.
If Not for Religion, person like me for dey marry and discard any misfit of a wife Annually.

WHAT DO HUSBANDS EVEN GAIN FROM WIVES

everyone is free to voice their opinion. I have just said my opinion like the Op has said his. If you are pained by my comment, Remember there are over 1000 ways to die...CHOOSE ONE
Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by pocohantas(f): 4:33pm On Nov 24, 2016
eezeribe:
What else is the function of a wife...
A man provides for everything in the home, some even pay salary to their wife, some wives even find it difficult to wash their husband's clothes.Some husbands even settle for dry cleaners or buy washing machine for their wife(which would also be of benefit to her).
Most husbands leave for work on empty stomach and come back late to meet cold food which has been grudgingly served by the wife or in most cases... The maid
Marriage is a woman's Asset and a Man's Liability
After paying so much as bride price and bearing the cost of the wedding which she made more expensive... At least the least he can get is a good food at home.No wonder the divorce rate keeps going up and Many single and Eligible people don't want marriage commitment.
If Not for Religion, person like me for overtake King Solomon.

WHAT DO HUSBANDS EVEN GAIN FROM WIVES

Women's asset indeed.
How much is bride price and wedding?
Get a maid, pay her for her services for just a year... let's see if it won't exceed the cost of the so called bride price and wedding.

You people keep saying wedding, like we don't attend wedding every Saturdays to see how it goes.

This mindset is what has led to so many figurehead fathers, you bring money, disappear...leaving every other to the wife.

Please overtake Solomon, you should also be aware of what it cost him to maintain that lifestyle.

3 Likes

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by Nobody: 4:34pm On Nov 24, 2016
babythug:
I feel men in Nigeria and Africa as a whole are inhibited by their mindsets and culture as against being practical!

There have been many occasions where I could be caught up in traffic till late and hubby has returned home early but he won't start dinner or even feed himself because "his wife should do the cooking"

Where of course it's more practical for the men to cook they still won't! Funny thing is African men who live in the diaspora embrace this your school of thought far better than those residing in Africa!!!!

Yea, you know why? because over there equality is practiced. But here Men believe a woman primary work is cooking, while Women believe its the primary work of Man to provide. So women often fold their arms to financial contribution in families & Men fold their arms in domestic contributions in homes like taking care of the kids, cooking, basic house wellfare etc.

Problem is mindset

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by seizethaBae(f): 4:36pm On Nov 24, 2016
Tell 'em bro! grin
Christane:
I prefer Bad cook bt good in bed.. Bt good cook with a good heart nd good in bed is a blessing 4rm God himself.
Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by oostin: 4:36pm On Nov 24, 2016
Please women should learn how to cook and stop making up excuses.

If a lot of us men took our time to learn how to cook then women have absolutely no excuse.

1 Like

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by Nobody: 4:38pm On Nov 24, 2016
Starving yourself because your wife is not available at the time is your call. Even when she is around why can't you surprise her with breakfast in bed? Or cook a romantic dinner just to make her feel like a queen sometimes, smh

2 Likes

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by theemy(m): 4:38pm On Nov 24, 2016
TheArchangel:
These are the functions of a maid/ house help.
God created women to be a companion to men.

1 Like

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by Nobody: 4:40pm On Nov 24, 2016
Empredboy:
For the past 5 years that i have been married and still counting i will say 3 things is what will make a woman GOOD
(1) she must be a good cook
(2) she must be good in bed
(3) she must be submissive and respectful to people.
Any lady who have it is lucky and any man who finds such woman is the luckiest of all.

And what do you bring to the table? cheesy

1 Like

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by Nobody: 4:42pm On Nov 24, 2016
profmallory:
men go to war when one arises, provide for the family and even when we boil inside society does permit us to display it. So is it too much to ask to have a wife that can cook good food, why is this our generation so disillusioned with this "free life style attidude" and its not an 'African thing', most women across the globe cook for their families.


Who wrote the African laws? And if women were not included or our views not sort after why should we abide by these rules grin

2 Likes

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by daygee12: 4:45pm On Nov 24, 2016
babythug:
I feel men in Nigeria and Africa as a whole are inhibited by their mindsets and culture as against being practical!

There have been many occasions where I could be caught up in traffic till late and hubby has returned home early but he won't start dinner or even feed himself because "his wife should do the cooking"

Where of course it's more practical for the men to cook they still won't! Funny thing is African men who live in the diaspora embrace this your school of thought far better than those residing in Africa!!!!

Dont tag it as African mindset, i had dis discussion with an italian colleague yesterday, he said he respects ladies dat can cook dat he can never marry a girl dat cant cook. He said he was upset wen he(italian) visited his friend and finds out dat his friend's girlfriend doesnt want to cook. this is not African mindset only indians and Arab countries respect ladies dat can cook.

1 Like

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by Livefreeordieha(m): 4:46pm On Nov 24, 2016
you probably right cuz nowadays 85%% of the socalled marriages are for convenience..and the spouses dont complain as each get what is deficient outside..make no mistake even history has it that A GOOD COOK OWNS THE HUSBAND..decieve yourselves ,leave in self denial no one cares anymore ever wonder who is eating at all those roadside joints scattered all over nigeria that even the owners have ran out of names to give now we are even having clash of names..today world mama put is a gallant employer of labour build mansions own chains of restaurants..shey nor be people husbands dey eat from there?shey diz men nor do pre wedding photos?spend million to carry gbese put house?later u go dey wonder why men nor dey finish for joint..i juz dey observe..
DarkRebel101:
With the exemption of Christ who fasted for forty days and forty nights, what man and what woman can do without food? The answer to that is as plain as a pikestaff. No man, no woman, no earthenware vessel under the sun can do without food.

It's an established fact that feeding is a basic necessity for human survival; why then would one shortchange him-herself by not learning this simple yet vital life skill which is almost as essential as the very air we breathe?—the skill of cooking that is.

Why do men believe the process of nourishing themselves is effeminate and a task so inferior that it must be exclusively reserved for the office of womanhood? Isn't that a rather obtuse way of looking at it?

Why are husbands who lend helping hands to their wives in the kitchen said to be henpecked and of the sissy variety? Is the raiment of masculinity to be shorn of tenderness and the capacity for love and care?

Why are our sons dissuaded from being with their mothers in the kitchen where they might pick up these crucial culinary skills? Why do we believe it's mandatory that our daughters be immersed in the art of cookery, but that it isn't necessary for our sons to be?
Are we implicitly stating that our daughters are worthy of knowing how to go about in feeding themselves, but that our sons aren't?

Don't we think it's unwise if one is incapable of slaking his-her hunger unless he-she is to rely on the efforts of others? Isn't that akin to having to urinate with another person's gënitals?

Why is it customary that all women should know how to cook but not all men? Is it that they cook better? – surely that cannot be true -- after all, many of the top chefs in the world are males.

Can we say women have a heightened sense of taste and smell which enables them to cook better than men? Is it that they were born with cooking genes which makes them immanently adept at knowing just how much salt, and how much curry, and how much grinded pepper would suffice in making that pot of stew capable of exciting even the most apathetic taste buds? Surely that is not the case as well.

[...]

The purpose of this piece is to upend the notion that bad cooks make bad wives, and to encourage men to put on those dazzling aprons and learn how to cook—even if it's only the staple delicacies of the climes in which they are domiciled.

We – men – would realise just how numerous the benefits of knowing how to cook are when we give it some thought.

Think of it, if you happen to have just had a huge quarrel with your wife and you know how to cook, you wouldn't have to wait until she comes around before you regale yourself with a nice meal.
Knowing how to cook would also reduce the workload for your wife and anneal the emotional connection betwixt the twain of you, and believe me you when I say your wife would greatly appreciate your contributions and adore you the more.

For the bachelors inept in cooking, do you mean to say that you would live solely on junk food and continue to patronise eateries and ‘Mama Put’ until you decide to take the plunge? Not only is this unhealthy, it's also a major economic misfiring.

This – cooking – is also a skill that could generate lots of income if mastered to an expert degree. There's never a time or season when Caterers and Cooks never flourish – especially in a party-loving, owambe-ridden country such as ours where each week is characterised by the efflux of wedding parties, birthday parties, naming ceremonies, school parties, office parties, etcetera. Why deprive yourself of something which promises such prolific dividends?

[...]

I'm sure some people must have asked us this about our bride-to-be: ‘Can she cook?’. We must have also heard statements like: ‘A woman had better know how to cook, otherwise she would lose her husband to other women’.

Are men now such ‘self-controless’ and debauched beasts that mere food would drive them to infidelity?

[...]

Being the curious philosopher and true-blue adherent of Cartesian skepticism that I am, one of my life's purposes has always been to scrutinize social mores and practices of dubious provenance which we've embraced without questioning, and also in unearthing the reeking worms of falsehood that have bored their slimy selves into the tapestry of our lives—lives which our arbitrary, man-made cultural precepts and conventions have made even more difficult than they are supposed to be. It is for this reason, doubled up with an innate cynicism, that I decided to reevaluate society's stance on the topic of cooking—the pulse-beat of domesticity.

And it was during one of my brooding sessions that I segued into an oasis of inward calmness and clarity of mind which led me to the pearly gates of this interestingly revealing epiphany:

“Before the early men accidentally dropped meat into fire and figured it smelt and tasted better than the raw meat which they ate hitherto -- before that inadventent discovery, the burden of cooking never rested on the shoulders of women. Women were never relied upon for feeding.”

It was in that Eureka moment I realized that women aren't naturally disposed to cooking, they were only socially-engineered to see it as a task requisite to being a valid member of the female gender. In other words, society conditioned women to see the art of cooking as one of the cardinal gender roles which they must embrace.

Now that we know women are not born with cooking genes, men should never use a woman's cooking skills as a yardstick when wife-hunting. Cooking skills should never be used as parameters in judging a woman's personality or character. A man that cannot cook is just as guilty as a woman that cannot.

Now that we know women have no cooking genes, parents should ensure that both their sons and daughters learn how to cook while they are still young and tender. Our sons should not be handled with a free-wheeling hand in this regard.

Now that we know women have no cooking genes, no husband should expect his wife who has returned home after a long day, and who has been treated to the numbing biffs of lassitude, to waddle her way into the kitchen and conjure up a meal in that rest-deprived state. Why couldn't he have fixed himself a plate? Because he didn't know how to cook? What's stopping him from learning?

Now that we know women have no cooking genes, a woman who knows how to cook but doesn't like cooking should not be subjected to derision and name-calling—feminist devil, liberal witch, left-winged Jezebel, Betrayer of the African tradition, etcetera. A woman who knows how to cook but doesn't enjoy it is no different from the man who knows how to cook but shirks from doing so because he derives no pleasure from it.

I cook fairly well too – thanks to my loving grandmother – but were it optional, I'd rather choose not to cook—the heat, the tardiness of the process, the steam, the almost-neurotic stirring and tasting of soup...All these are why I never like to cook except on special occasions. So you should understand why some women, though are excellent cooks, are not smitten in the least by the idea of cooking.

[...]


The ideal thing, especially in this fast-paced, digitalized age where the percentage of housewives dwindles by the minute, is for men to dispose of the notions inherited from our forbears, to let go of the vestiges of the remote and irrelevant past, and to make bold tectonic shifts toward a more progressive and bespoke mind-set—a mind-set specifically tailored for this era, a mind-set which sees clearly the inanity in what society has beguiled us into believing for centuries – the inanity in the belief that cooking is out-and-out a woman's job and that a man need not know how to cook.

[...]

Who says a woman cannot cook from Monday to Friday while her husband takes care of the cooking during the weekends? See? -- now that's what we call a cohesive and tandem partnership.


Happy cooking...



1 Like

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by Nobody: 4:49pm On Nov 24, 2016
SirShymexx:
Lol, the simps on this forum and the uncanny way they pander to women reeks of desperation and a way to mask the fact that they aren't getting no play in the real world. And the internet is the last bastion for that. These nyggahs are frauds, yo.

If you're a woman and you can't cook - you need to slap yourself for being a failure in life. That is the most basic thing a woman needs to learn how to do. It isn't even for the man - it's the economics and being able to provide well cooked meals for your kids. If you can't cook, then your ability to be a good mother, is also questionable.

No amount of simp pandering in desperation by frauds can change that. Learn how to cook.

Dude... don't mind the OP, i have seen some of his other posts. They are wimps who pander to women trying to indirectly win them over. Problem is, that ploy is often not successful.

Don't be shocked if most of the online feminist warriors tuck their tails between their legs at home. A woman SHOULD and MUST be able to cook for her own sake... no matter how many Oprah Winfrey doctrines you imbibe.

Just see how long the OP's epistle (half of which was nonsense) is, just to win the admiration of a few female admirers online. That's pathetic and sad frankly. Pure and undiluted desperation

.

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Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by SirShymexx: 4:53pm On Nov 24, 2016
freecocoa:
I think I agree with you on her ability to be a good mum being in question, if she can't cook, then again, every teenager should know how to cook, let alone adults.

I think it is because of the fixation on men and trying to win the battle of sexes, while losing the war. And even if you win the battle, once you lose the war, you are still a loser. A classic example of cutting ya nose to spite ya face.

As a woman, if you plan to have kids, what is the point if you don't know how to cook? Most people get married to have kids and if you can't perform one of the most important functions of being a mum - you're utter useless. Are you going to keep feeding your kids junk foods and make them unhealthy? Even the economics doesn't make sense cos home-cooked foods are cheaper, apart from being healthier.

Most people are just caught up in their own stupidity and warped judgement due to the inability to think things through and see the bigger picture. Then again, a lot of folks running around have low IQ.

Anyway, I don't waste time on shit like this one. Any guy who is dumb enough to marry a woman that can't cook should carry his cross. That is his problem, not mine - with kids looking either malnourished or as fat as Yokozuna from a young age. grin

I'm out here.

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Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by shumuel(m): 4:53pm On Nov 24, 2016
Any lady that cant cook is an unserious lady, i mean whats so had in cooking ? If you ask me i know its pure laziness that had hit our ladies big time, they just want to revolt for no reason., if not we shouldn't even be having this topic nor the discussion.

Boil water, pour it in, allow it cook, dish it, Finish,, how hard was that ? angry


Sisisioge well said smiley

1 Like

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by wildchild1: 4:55pm On Nov 24, 2016
Obviously


Check my signature
Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by omonnakoda: 4:58pm On Nov 24, 2016
Men are better cooks anyway and it is just a form of federal character in the home that makes us cede this function to women.iF you think about itA man invented moinmoin,suya, dodo,Edikaikong and so on
Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by Nobody: 4:59pm On Nov 24, 2016
daygee12:


Dont tag it as African mindset, i had dis discussion with an italian colleague yesterday, he said he respects ladies dat can cook dat he can never marry a girl dat cant cook. He said he was upset wen he(italian) visited his friend and finds out dat his friend's girlfriend doesnt want to cook. this is not African mindset only indians and Arab countries respect ladies dat can cook.

I agree with you, cooking skills are also appreciated abroad on the European soil. However, OP did not say that women should not know how to cook ,even though the title implies it, but rather that everyone should know how to cook and I agree. What's so difficult about it anyway?

4 Likes

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by profmallory(m): 4:59pm On Nov 24, 2016
There are no rules, cooking is what lots of women across the length and breadth of Africa do with Joy

Pidgin2:


Who wrote the African laws? And if women were not included or our views not sort after why should we abide by these rules grin
Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by theemy(m): 5:01pm On Nov 24, 2016
TheArchangel:
These are the functions of a maid/ house help.
God created women to be a companion to men.
. By the time ur husband starts show advances at the maid know it's ur fault
Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by Nobody: 5:01pm On Nov 24, 2016
omonnakoda:
Men are better cooks anyway and it is just a form of federal character in the home that makes us cede this function to women.iF you think about itA man invented moinmoin,suya, dodo,Edikaikong and so on

And the greatest chefs all around the world are male by the way. wink
Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by RoadsAndGreen(m): 5:02pm On Nov 24, 2016
our culture has been under attack for so long.

by "changing world" those girls clearly meant "western culture".
I have said it, our fore fathers would be ashamed of us.

our culture dont seem appealing to us anymore. this is mind slavery.

oh I envy the Chinese, the Arabs, they've held on tight to theirs but Africa?

we lost our religion, our dressing, our morals, our languages are dying and now our women no longer want to cook.

what is happening

invasion

3 Likes

Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by omonnakoda: 5:02pm On Nov 24, 2016
Mindfulness:


And the greatest chefs all around the world are male by the way. wink
Yours truly is the greatest.
Re: Bad Cooks Don't Make Bad Wives by iykedakelvin(m): 5:04pm On Nov 24, 2016
Its okay

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