Nigeria is a crazy place to be as you all might have known by now. Nigerians have so gotten used to crazy events on a daily basis that nothing surprises them anymore. Those familiar with the Batman franchise will agree that Nigeria can be likened to Gotham city. The following are some of the insane things happening right now. Some, fearful.

10. We Might Have Voted-In A Dictator
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The military regime of President Muhammadu Buhari which lasted for two years, 1983-1985, still leaves a sour taste on the lips of those who witnessed his reign.

It was termed a political propaganda when the opposition party and well-meaning Nigerians tried to warn against voting in a dictator, an enemy of democracy. However, happenings like - the government's disregard for court rulings, the commando-style invasion of judges homes and their arrest, attacks on peaceful protesters, the alleged Shia massacre, unlawful, shameful arrests of journalists, the intimidation of Nigerians trying to protest against bad governance come Feb 6th - is giving Nigerians a hard time deciding if they're in a democratic or Military regime.

9. University Degree Becoming Worthless
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Gone are the days when going to the university and graduating with a degree exuded great pride and stood as a symbol of a better life. Unemployment continues to be on the rise, many employers tagging the bulk of Nigerian graduates unemployable. Let's assume they are employable, where are the jobs?

The recent surge in entrepreneurship is proof that more and more graduates are dumping their certificates, acknowledging the painful reality that 4,5-6 years of their life might have been wasted in an effortless pursuit. N-power -the government's recent response to tackling unemployment - and the number that applied within 36hours simply shows that University Degrees are becoming even more and more worthless if one will settle for 30,000 naira and a tab after spending 4-5years grinding hard in our wicked, life-zapping educational sector.

8. The Crazy, Do or Die Fight Against MMM
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The slow, decietful, painful-to-watch fight every single administration since time immemorial has put-up against corruption might have brain-washed Nigerians into thinking we as a people, and the Government cannot successfully fight against any form of evil, not until MMM came - a ponzi scheme promising 30% increase on every donation.

I watched how the Government, so- called well meaning Nigerians who didn't invested one single kobo in the scheme, media outlets, and big websites formed a formidable team of Spartans who would stop at nothing but deliver their people from the claws of Mavrodi. Anyone with a mobile phone, Tv-set, radio or any source of receiving information will testify that this was one hell of an intense, crazy fight. It was literally in our faces. It was the biggest, most successful fight in the history of Nigeria.

Apparently, it turns out corruption, kidnapping, police and army brutality, the government refusing to pay our aged parents pension are issues not as important as the evil MMM which ironically, though has faults, is the far lesser evil, having helped a few.


7. You, Me, The Entire Population - A Generation of Cowards
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The incessant complains and wailing of aggrieved Nigerians that continues to clog the webspace every single day is proof that we know how to do only one thing best...... complain complain and complain.

Shake your head, sigh deeply and say "this country don tire me" and watch everybody in the cramped-up taxi ramble-on violently about corruption and bad governance that has plagued us since the inception of Nigeria.

The fact that never in our history as a people have we ever come together in unity to say no oppression, corruption and bad governance proves we, me, you, are nothing but a generation of blabbing cowards.

I was pissed at Tu-face, how dare he betray the cause? But I looked in the mirror, and saw a reflection staring back that reminded me that we all - you, me and Tu-face are a generation of "run-mouth,-no-action" cowards.

6. Garri No Longer For The Poor
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"In a land of myth, and a time of magic, the destiny of a great Kingdom lies on the shoulders of a young boy". Sounds familiar right? Well, substitute myth for suffering, magic for hunger, and the young boy in question becomes Garri not Merlin. However, the super-man of the poor, the go-to guy of the low income earners, the Merlin of Camelot is currently being parried away from the reaching fingers of the poor.... day after day.

A paint rubber which not too long ago sold for 350 naira now sells for 800naira - a128.5% increase. What's even more troubling is the fact while prices of food items like Garri keeps increasing, the people who need them the most simply have no money to buy them. To add insult upon injury, Garri has no close substitute. So I ask; what will the poor feed on when the cheapest commodity they can fall back to is taken way from them?

I sincerely hope something is done about this soonest, cos the current situation, is clearly a case of water don pass garri... pun not intended.

5. Ponzi Schemes Are Here To Stay
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Before the recession-driven suffering and hardship hit our airwaves the number of Nigerians who would even risk giving audience to ponzi scheme promoters, not to mention participating in one, could be estimated to be around 0.001% of the entire population.

However, things took a U-turn when the recession started knocking on doors nationwide. People began to look for alternative means to survive, and ponzi schemes provided not only that but more; an extra opportunity to make quick, raw, cool cash.

The federal government in collaboration with the media put in tireless efforts to scare the masses but their resolve proved too tough a shell to crack. It was too late, Nigerians had already tasted the forbidden fruit.
The recent, well publicised crash crash of MMM was meant to serve as a lesson, but dogged Nigerians - including those who were victims - continue to participate in new schemes that keep popping up day by day. They are fully aware of the risks involved, proving that ponzi schemes are here to stay.. at least for now.

4. No Plan To Rescue Economy From Recession
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Nigerians continue to suffer day in day out, the hardship worsening with each break of a new dawn than the night before. When the receasion started, many thought it was only a phase meant to last for a brief period, a necessary, yet unavoidable cleansing process we had to undergo to purge the economy from diarrhoea of the previous administration, but here we are, three centuries later, still recessing even deeper.

A dollar is about 500naira now and it keeps increasing everyday, prices of food items keep skyrocketing, we are on the brink of chaos yet the government has no laid-down blue print to rescue the economy. The important question now is - how close are we to the elastic limit?

3. The Masses Want The President Dead
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Nigerians have really endured alot and passed through hell throughout time immemorial. Our ability to adapt and make jokes in the face of hardship recounts a tale of how a group of people have evolved over time to cheerfully adapt to hardship and suffering. Our mantra, "suffering and smiling", gives a sneak-peek into dark parts of our history better forgotten than retold.

So what's happening? Why are we no longer making funny jokes, but dry, expensive ones - like wishing our president death?

The recent rumor of his death that spread all-over the web like chicken pox in just a little amount of time echoed the silent wishes of majority; the masses want the President dead. And since wishing someone dead is universally regarded the highest form of hatred... a.k.a the holy-grail of hatred, it's safe to say we are indeed living in troubling times.

2. A Deadly War Silently On The Rise
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The havoc boko-haram has wrecked on our dear country will look like child's play compared to what's to come if we don't act fast, and NOOOWWW!

Fulani herdsmen have been on rampage lately, slaughtering innocent Nigerians for absolutely no reason. The President has shockingly turned a blind eye to the killings, further fueling speculations that he supports the cause of his people, the fulanis. Feeling neglected in the face of terror, few communities took matters into their own hands by retaliating; well.... we all know how it ended.

In a time where the country is seriously divided on religious lines more than ever, the last thing we need is one group deliberately testing the patience of the other. Pastors are beginning to call their members to action. The Government continues to show it's bias towards one side from the recent arrests. Priests are now weilding arms. Christians are feeling persecuted.

Push a goat too far and watch the cute, little domestic animal transform into a monster. We are on the brink of chaos.

1. Is The President Dead Or......?
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When the president left the country ,19th January, on vacation to the UK, Nigerians were left confused and amused, "Who goes on vacation in January? Especially during hardship and suffering we needed his presence the most. It wasn't too long before rumours started spreading about his critical state of health being the sole reason behind his so-called vacation. Buhari, being no stranger to illness and health- related voyages to the UK in the past, left the masses with no other option than believe the rumour. The silence of his close aides didn't help matters either.

The pinnacle of his health controversy was reached however, when the news of his death began spreading like wild fire, the words " is buhari dead" becoming the most search phrase on Google.

His Special adviser on media and publicity has since come out to debunk the rumour, but Nigerians are still asking questions; is he dead or alive? . It's so crazy that though I wish the President good health, I cannot swear at gun-point that the President is alive... or dead either.

source: ksslib

make unable come laugh small

fp?

God o, come to our rescue

It our country. unto u ve where to run to

Nice writeup but sorry it won't hit the front page because of your positive stance on mmm

Na so Yar'Adua own start o

11: High cost of food

ovieigho:
Nice writeup but sorry it won't hit the front page because of your positive stance on mmm

cc: Lalasticlala, mynd44

So true

sprays mart

I see revolution

gbam

@op

100% true if u ask me.

Op you forgot to add...
11) The Afonjas are cowards.

ok i hear you

knuckbuck:
God o, come to our rescue

Nigerians are even tired of waiting for God.

watch how the mods would ignore this post(truth) like buhari to 9gerians











#IstandWithmyself
Sips coffee

@Op, u re right, Common sense will tell u all these.
But what pisses me off is when some men use common sense to make predictions and analysis and still have the guts to claim that God revealed to them, even when it's obvious that it is the work of common sense.
May the God that saw United States through during the time of Great Depressions in 1930s , See us through.
We will bounce back and tell our story after this hard times God's willing.

thumbs up @OP, the state of the nation is not something to write home about.

but what do you expect when an illiterate is at the helm of affairs?

If dis makes front page.....den Nairaland is not a biased forum!!...

All this posters above me, pls stop attacking the conscience of mods... Kilo de

drinking gari with groundnuts todday is a luxury. hallmark of an oppresive directionless useless govt.

Nice summary

You just laid the ZOO bare in black and white. What a rotten sh!thole!

Histrings08:
All this posters above me, pls stop attacking the conscience of mods... Kilo de

They are probably right, most articles that are anti government/APC hardly makes front page. This article is 100% worthy of front page but you will see how the mods will turn a blind eye. I pray to be proved wrong though.

Nice one OP. I concur with most of your point

seun should move this to fp na..