yemi1261:
your contribution is encouraging, am happy. I have spent a fortune. I will take to your candid opinion. God bless you

Sir, I am speaking from experience. Whether or not you get a diagnosis, it doesn't change the fact that your son has got challenges. It might provide relief to know exactly why he is the way he is but it won't answer the question, "what next?".

What you need to do is to itemise areas where you would like to see improvement, and work on them separately so you do not feel discouraged.

You have listed a lot of things he cannot do yet. Now you need to think of what he CAN do even if it's not the way you quite want it to be.

Does he seem like he is in his own world? Join him, does he enjoy jumping, running etc.. join him and then use the things he enjoys to teach him skills he needs.

Change the way you communicate. Instead of using long sentences, use key words or phrases e.g. Eat, "don't jump", "bed time".

Use lots of positive reinforcement and praise. When he gets something right, praise him.

Have you got a tablet for him? Get one and download lots of free apps for learning.

My son couldn't speak at two but he could arrange the alphabets from A-z and from z to a. The first word he spelt was hippopotamus and this was at age 3. Yet he couldn't say mummy, no or yes. He learnt this because I see the tablet to reinforce his learning visually and he could watch it as often as need to grasp the concept.

Most of all, I hate to say this but there is no miracle in the pipeline. Regardless of which church or drug, it is the effort you put in that will make the most impact.

I understand that you are grieving for the child you thought you would have. I went through the same phase. It is hard imagining that the future you want for him might not be possible.

Maybe so, but it doesn't mean he cannot grow up to be successful and happy. You simply have to redefine what both terms mean.

For me, happiness comes in so many forms. My baby saying "no", managing a trip past the supermarket without him needing to enter to buy peppers( he is obsessed with and has to walk everywhere with his peppers, red and green)

You can do this!

Yemi1261, in addition to going to a teaching hospital or even Yaba Psychiatric Hospital (I know some of the consultants there and I'm sure there is a Pediatric Psychologist on their team. There is no shame in this please), please please Please listen to shaybebaby. Because her boy is just like yours and you need all the help you can get and she is handling it successfully and her son is thriving. Not all this "pray this, pray that" from people who don't know the challenges of having a special needs child. Your son will be fine in Jesus' name and have a lovely unique life. But you need to start thinking on a higher smarter plane.

shaybebaby:

Sir, I am speaking from experience. Whether or not you get a diagnosis, it doesn't change the fact that your son has got challenges. It might provide relief to know exactly why he is the way he is but it won't answer the question, "what next?".

What you need to do is to itemise areas where you would like to see improvement, and work on them separately so you do not feel discouraged.

You have listed a lot of things he cannot do yet. Now you need to think of what he CAN do even if it's not the way you quite want it to be.

Does he seem like he is in his own world? Join him, does he enjoy jumping, running etc.. join him and then use the things he enjoys to teach him skills he needs.

Change the way you communicate. Instead of using long sentences, use key words or phrases e.g. Eat, "don't jump", "bed time".

Use lots of positive reinforcement and praise. When he gets something right, praise him.

Have you got a tablet for him? Get one and download lots of free apps for learning.

My son couldn't speak at two but he could arrange the alphabets from A-z and from z to a. The first word he spelt was hippopotamus and this was at age 3. Yet he couldn't say mummy, no or yes. He learnt this because I see the tablet to reinforce his learning visually and he could watch it as often as need to grasp the concept.

Most of all, I hate to say this but there is no miracle in the pipeline. Regardless of which church or drug, it is the effort you put in that will make the most impact.

I understand that you are grieving for the child you thought you would have. I went through the same phase. It is hard imagining that the future you want for him might not be possible.

Maybe so, but it doesn't mean he cannot grow up to be successful and happy. You simply have to redefine what both terms mean.

For me, happiness comes in so many forms. My baby saying "no", managing a trip past the supermarket without him needing to enter to buy peppers( he is obsessed with and has to walk everywhere with his peppers, red and green)

You can do this!

wow awesome!

Onegai:
Yemi1261, in addition to going to a teaching hospital or even Yaba Psychiatric Hospital (I know some of the consultants there and I'm sure there is a Pediatric Psychologist on their team. There is no shame in this please), please please Please listen to shaybebaby. Because her boy is just like yours and you need all the help you can get and she is handling it successfully and her son is thriving. Not all this "pray this, pray that" from people who don't know the challenges of having a special needs child. Your son will be fine in Jesus' name and have a lovely unique life. But you need to start thinking on a higher smarter plane.

Honey boo, you have no idea but I do not blame them. It IS hard to accept the worst case scenario and the pray scenario keeps the hope alive but alas, no in anyway proactive where you actually DOING something.

A special needs child is just that, SPECIAL. Which means you have to stop measuring him by the same yardstick used for other children and start measuring him by his only.

They can do what we do albeit differently, so it is up to us to adopt a difference stance to the norm to help them. Abi, if a child is not communicating verbally does not mean verbal communication is the only way. No be type we dey type now? It's all in there but needs to coaxed out differently.

My son doesn't understand emotions fully. To work on that, you should my acting. I'll stand in front of the mirror with him, and pull all kinds of faces. With time, he started copying me. But initially, when he saw other kids crying, he would start screaming or walk up to them and push his face into theirs laughing and trying to touch their tears.

He didn't understand what it was and why it was. So when he would be upset, I put the emotions into words-"N is sad, N is crying" and take him to the mirror. Ofcourse that soon changed to him saying to me EVERY SINGLE time "CRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY". Asking me to cry

So I would pretend to cry, saying mummy sad, mummy cry, say sorry mummy. If he rubbed my head, I'll act happy, say thank you and awwww. Now, HE says mummy sorry when he sees that I'm not happy and when He is upset, he says " N sad".

All this took about a year and a half just working on emotions and recognizing them. But I guess my point is, other kids pick up emotions and other things relating to social interaction just like that that we don't even realize that it is learned by observation. Kids on the spectrum feel the things and see them but do not understand what they are feeling or what others are. They have to be taught how to recognize this.

I could go on and on.

Onegai:
Yemi1261, in addition to going to a teaching hospital or even Yaba Psychiatric Hospital (I know some of the consultants there and I'm sure there is a Pediatric Psychologist on their team. There is no shame in this please), please please Please listen to shaybebaby. Because her boy is just like yours and you need all the help you can get and she is handling it successfully and her son is thriving. Not all this "pray this, pray that" from people who don't know the challenges of having a special needs child. Your son will be fine in Jesus' name and have a lovely unique life. But you need to start thinking on a higher smarter plane.

I find your advise useful, God will answer all your prayers IJN, I WILL BE GOING FOR ANOTHER CHECK UP THIS wEEK WED.

shaybebaby:


Honey boo, you have no idea but I do not blame them. It IS hard to accept the worst case scenario and the pray scenario keeps the hope alive but alas, no in anyway proactive where you actually DOING something.

A special needs child is just that, SPECIAL. Which means you have to stop measuring him by the same yardstick used for other children and start measuring him by his only.

They can do what we do albeit differently, so it is up to us to adopt a difference stance to the norm to help them. Abi, if a child is not communicating verbally does not mean verbal communication is the only way. No be type we dey type now? It's all in there but needs to coaxed out differently.

My son doesn't understand emotions fully. To work on that, you should my acting. I'll stand in front of the mirror with him, and pull all kinds of faces. With time, he started copying me. But initially, when he saw other kids crying, he would start screaming or walk up to them and push his face into theirs laughing and trying to touch their tears.

He didn't understand what it was and why it was. So when he would be upset, I put the emotions into words-"N is sad, N is crying" and take him to the mirror. Ofcourse that soon changed to him saying to me EVERY SINGLE time "CRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY". Asking me to cry

So I would pretend to cry, saying mummy sad, mummy cry, say sorry mummy. If he rubbed my head, I'll act happy, say thank you and awwww. Now, HE says mummy sorry when he sees that I'm not happy and when He is upset, he says " N sad".

All this took about a year and a half just working on emotions and recognizing them. But I guess my point is, other kids pick up emotions and other things relating to social interaction just like that that we don't even realize that it is learned by observation. Kids on the spectrum feel the things and see them but do not understand what they are feeling or what others are. They have to be taught how to recognize this.

I could go on and on.

thanks dear

yemi1261:
thanks dear

You welcome. Stay strong for the little man.

Cutehector:
u mean I should trust you enough to come see you in delta? You got the cash.. Why not come down to pH.. And we can reason together

I beg you in the name of God to stop your exchange of words with that guy. If not for anything but for the sake of the op and others with similar issues like this .



I know you both wanted to help solve this problem but you guys are already derailing this thread and I believe this thread is too sensitive for all that. I use whatever you both worship to appeal to you guys to please respect this thread.

kayzat:






I beg you in the name of God to stop your exchange of words with that guy. If not for anything but for the sake of the op and others with similar issues like this .



I know you both wanted to help solve this problem but you guys are already derailing this thread and I believe this thread is too sensitive for all that. I use whatever you both worship to appeal to you guys to please respect this thread.

thanks

Mr YEMI, I really empathize with you! With God's help, and necessary practical approaches as described by Shaybebaby, your son shall be well in Jesus name!
Be stronger (because you're already strong) for the young man air and for the family as a whole. It's a good thing you have come to this forum to seek help and I'm sure you've gained something valuable just as I had also learnt some new things from different posters here!


@shaybebaby, wow! you're a very strong and practical woman, both your husband and children are very lucky to have your type. God bless you richly and my regards to your wonderful boy!

greatgod2012:
Mr YEMI, I really empathize with you! With God's help, and necessary practical approaches as described by Shaybebaby, your son shall be well in Jesus name!
Be stronger (because you're already strong) for the young man air and for the family as a whole. It's a good thing you have come to this forum to seek help and I'm sure you've gained something valuable just as I had also learnt some new things from different posters here!


@shaybebaby, wow! you're a very strong and practical woman, both your husband and children are very lucky to have your type. God bless you richly and my regards to your wonderful boy!

Awwww, thank you. He is my inspiration and I was lucky to have someone knock sense into me when i was down and panicking about the future.

His Son is well and he will do great things because his Pa will be in his corner fighting for him everyday.

I will pass on your good wishes to my little man. It gladdens my heart to know good wishes are being sent his way. Thank you for this.

shaybebaby:


Awwww, thank you. He is my inspiration and I was lucky to have someone knock sense into me when i was down and panicking about the future.

His Son is well and he will do great things because his Pa will be in his corner fighting for him everyday.

I will pass on your good wishes to my little man. It gladdens my heart to know good wishes are being sent his way. Thank you for this.

You're welcome sis!

And thank you for the continuous encouragement for the op!

greatgod2012:
Mr YEMI, I really empathize with you! With God's help, and necessary practical approaches as described by Shaybebaby, your son shall be well in Jesus name!
Be stronger (because you're already strong) for the young man air and for the family as a whole. It's a good thing you have come to this forum to seek help and I'm sure you've gained something valuable just as I had also learnt some new things from different posters here!


@shaybebaby, wow! you're a very strong and practical woman, both your husband and children are very lucky to have your type. God bless you richly and my regards to your wonderful boy!

this is good, I appreciate you a lot

greatgod2012:



You're welcome sis!

And thank you for the continuous encouragement for the op!

you have indeed strengthened me, God bless you

yemi1261:
thanks a lot, we registered at Massey children hospital in Lagos island when we started noticing his behaviour, they refferd us there to enable them detect the possible. The test revealed some facts not revealed to me. They only gave drugs which will last for three years. The cost of this drug alone is draining me. We took him to general hospital again, they still gave us letter to tabs for another brain test. I dey die small small now

PM me if U are base in Lagos.

Oyind18:
I didn't know she was going through all that. I visit her last month, the boy sounds like a goat(that's how best I can describe the sound). He is in school, still wear diapers. I will go to her place and tell her to take them to see a doctor.

PM me if U are in Lagos I am a Therapist, I work with children and young adults with special needs.

napoleon77:


The child is clearly autistic and needs special care.

I'm not sure medication can cure autism, all the child needs is special care. I'm not sure there are special needs schools in Nigeria but that's the type of school he needs to attend.

There are a lot of special needs centres/schools in Nigeria sir.

sunnymighty:


PM me if U are in Lagos I am a Therapist, I work with children and young adults with special needs.

I'm in Rivers state. You can help by telling me if there's any in Rivers. I will let her know.

sunnymighty:


There are a lot of special needs centres/schools in Nigeria sir.

Good to know.

Oyind18:
I'm in Rivers state. You can help by telling me if there's any in Rivers. I will let her know.

I will help U to find out,although we had a developmental fair at UNIPORT some years back.

sunnymighty:


I will help U to find out,although we had a developmental fair at UNIPORT some years back.

Thank you very much.. Mind if I pm u?

@Oyind18 how old are these kids in question?

Oyind18:
Thank you very much.. Mind if I pm u?

Sure

sunnymighty:
@Oyind18 how old are these kids in question?

4 years and 2 years, the boy can't talk and he still wears pampers. The girl was asleep the day I visit the family so I don't know much about her. The boy is scared of everything and restless.

sunnymighty:


Sure

Thank you very much..

Oyind18:
4 years and 2 years, the boy can't talk and he still wears pampers. The girl was asleep the day I visit the family so I don't know much about her. The boy is scared of everything and restless.

Eh yah, much as I wouldn't want to attach a label on such child am sure there could be some developmental issues here, probably both or one of them could be on the spectrum.

sunnymighty:


Eh yah, much as I try to avoid labelling am sure there could be some developmental issues here, probably both or one of them could be on the spectrum.

God bless you Sir

sunnymighty:


PM me if U are base in Lagos.

yes, thanks am in Lagos. But I have a therapist who handles him currently

Oyind18:
4 years and 2 years, the boy can't talk and he still wears pampers. The girl was asleep the day I visit the family so I don't know much about her. The boy is scared of everything and restless.

ditto for mine too., too restless, does not talk, urinates and deficates at will anywhere that pleases him without notifying anyone, plays with both urine and faeces and wears diapers at 3.

yemi1261:
ditto for mine too., too restless, does not talk, urinates and deficates at will anywhere that pleases him without notifying anyone, plays with both urine and faeces and wears diapers at 3.

Thanks Mr Yemi, I just left my friend's place. The boy is 4, I met the maid changing his diapers. Just don't give up.


A big thank you to Mr Sunny.

May God heal him totally.

Take your son to mountain of fire and miracles ministries for deliverance
The devil must be defeated