Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,150,559 members, 7,809,036 topics. Date: Thursday, 25 April 2024 at 09:34 PM

When Your Wife Is Richer Than You - Family (5) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / When Your Wife Is Richer Than You (63688 Views)

Help My Child Is 8 Months And Wife Is Pregnant Again / When A Man Is Richer Vs When A Woman Is Richer / My Wife Is Not What I Thought Before We Got Married: I Want To Divorce (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Nobody: 4:01pm On Apr 28, 2017
Eazybay:



This info is not correct @ all ooo. Op just gave an expository via her own prism. There are irresponsible men everywhere who don't care if their kids eat and they also belabor their wives to death. Even steal from them, beat and abuse. Yet the women stay submissive and u are surprised as to how dat works. Believe me, dis scenario I've pointed out is more common Dan the one op has pointed out.
cool
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Nobody: 4:02pm On Apr 28, 2017
OLAJADON:

Is not the same thing, when a woman is richer than her husband it bruises the man ego, this is natural let put society issue aside. It make the male feel less of a man, it is only a man that they have jazz that will allow his Wife more wealth than him without doubling his hustle
The question you should have asked is that how was the woman behaving to her husband knowing fully well that she is more wealth than him, there must be something the society or the guy's family see that made them make those conclusions.

Ok so it's the behaviour .... I see cool
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Nobody: 4:06pm On Apr 28, 2017
Mynd44:

Part of the reason why men dont like when their wife is richer is because they want to dominate the woman but the more financialy independent a person (male or female), the less possible it is to doninate that person. So they say a richer woman will be proud but it is that she will not agree to be subjugated.

They also seem to think a richer wife won't have time to take care of the home. They want a maid as a wife who will be in the kitchen or in the bed.

Personally, if I have a wife that's richer, better for us as the family have more disposable income and the standard of living rises. I dont see the need to control my wife as we are partners, we can just be ourselves.

And on the issue of taking care of the house, my wife is not a maid. I will rather employ a maid and pay the maid to do that. Heck, aint nothing sexier than your wife going for a board meeting and coning back to "thank" you for supporting her prepare for it.

But then again, what do I know? I dont even have a GF.

Yes, this is an advert

You are a man, a real man.
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by sergiolefty(m): 4:06pm On Apr 28, 2017
the way we yooba reason when it comes to matter like this always gat me laffing
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by shumuel(m): 4:07pm On Apr 28, 2017
Omotayor123:
I just witnessed a scene where a woman is sent packing from her matrimonial home because she's allegedly "using her husband STAR"
A Star that couldn't buy him a Bicycle before the Marriage.cheesy

Even if she was using the Said Star isn't it just better for her to Continuegrin

Jokes Apart,


This is the Gist:
The couple both work in a Big company But the wife is more financially stable compare to the husband. she's currently building a house with her husband supervising the whole thing. she got a car of recent in her husband's name but the family and the Society won't have any of these.

Her kindness have been turn to wickedness and she's being sent packing in a humiliating manner. (They have a kid)

Now, my question is:

When you were using your own star you can't afford a bike.
When your wife bought you a new car,you and your family said she is spiritually using your star.


Isn't it a Low self esteem If your wife's income and financial status is affecting your confidence as a man

If you Make her life miserable and not make her happy just because she's richer than you, does that not mean you were never in love with her.

Love is peace,not competition. Whoever makes more money shouldn't
be a problem as long as we knows and respects each other as husband and wife.....


What's your Take on This




Lol grin abi o, if the start isn't working for him, why not allow his wife continue to make use of it, atleast that's a better way out for the couple.

Nigerians are very funny grin
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Nobody: 4:10pm On Apr 28, 2017
The man is the ego, the ego is the man. You take away the ego, you take away the man.
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by dominique(f): 4:10pm On Apr 28, 2017
A man that is not comfortable with his wife's success, is that one a man? Honestly the woman in the OP is better off than the dead weight called Her husband. She might be devastated about the failed marriage now, but as time goes on she will be glad that she's no longer part of that silly family.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Jman06(m): 4:17pm On Apr 28, 2017
Safiaa:
The fact of the matter is that MOST men will NOT be comfortable with their wife earning more than them. There is a sense of masculinty that men get being the main financial support for their familes. Now that doesnt mean a woman should take advantage of the fact that she earns more. But hey, such is life.

When i talk about not dating 'broke men' it falls back to this. You cant tell me this is the 21st century, and women are the financial providers these days. It takes a very strong emotionally stable man to withstand his wife making more than him. Women want to naturally feel like their being taken of regardless of their own financial status, so in the end it may cause problems. Its the truth, and i dont care what anybody has to say.
You have no right to declare your opinion as the truth. This one problem we have as Nigerians, always holding unfounded views as truth.

Not all men want to keep their women down in order to control her. That's insecurity!

2 Likes

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Safiaa(f): 4:19pm On Apr 28, 2017
Shut up. Did i say all men? I said most.
Jman06:
You have no right to declare your opinion as the truth. This one problem we have as Nigerians, always holding unfounded views as truth.

Not all men want to keep their women down in order to control her. That's insecurity!

1 Like

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Nobody: 4:20pm On Apr 28, 2017
Bumbae1:
Whats wrong with the woman being the rich one
Shebi na same thing
No.its never the same
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Eazybay(m): 4:22pm On Apr 28, 2017
Merceline:
chores ke did he marry her only for chores? is the chore meant for any special person? anybody who has the chance can do it. children belongs to man and wife, same as the house. everyone who is an adult should clean after themselves. if the lady happens to make more money it means absolutely nothing. the man should be humble enough to accept it and the lady humble enough to know that their marriage is not because of money. once they are married they are one and the same irrespective of who makes more dough. both of them need to cut their ego. humility, love and respect apply to both of them in that situation not the just the woman.
men are allowed to be pompous and proud and order women around when they have money.
once the position reverses the man's ego becomes sensitive to everything the woman does.
not that I support it but it is the reality.

I still think there is more to it than meets the eye. In this case, remember dey work in the same firm. I believe a lot of things may have happened through office politics and power play all we have here is an abridged one sided version of a seemingly long and sad tale.

1 Like

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by OLAJADON: 4:25pm On Apr 28, 2017
Bumbae1:


Ok so it's the behaviour .... I see cool
Don't get me wrong am not saying the guy does nt have his fault but am only saying the Wife should understand the psychology of men.
That why a guy will tolerate insult from another guy but won't allow that from a female(it all revolve around ego).
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Nobody: 4:27pm On Apr 28, 2017
Alondrah:
99% of Nigerian Men are confused egoistic, insecure hypocrites!. I can type that again If need be in slow motion. They want to dominate, control,organize , oversee , dictate and direct the other gender's life yet they complain, wail and ask what the woman brings into marriage / relationship.

When a woman is below them, they trample on her, when she's above them, she becomes a threat to their existence. Then I ask, what do men want?. Aren't they just confused babies after all? undecided

This is why I advise ladies to achieve what they want to achieve, be who they want to be, be financially stable before considering marriage, then the man will have no choice than to either get richer than you are, or accept you for whom you are. (before Marriage).

A man has no right to take a woman's life from her but can share her life with her. smiley
I concur 100%

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Josephamstrong1(m): 4:28pm On Apr 28, 2017
Eeeeh!
Common star?
Baby abeg use my star shine if e no gree shine for me...hian!
See o grin

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by ndubueze92(m): 4:32pm On Apr 28, 2017
Omotayor123:
Not at all. check me out. I hardly create thread.
Inasmuch as I would want my wife not to be so dependent on me... I would want her to be richer than me on the long run... They can talk. I believe one day she will rain insults on you... I wouldn't like such...except we sign an understanding that wouldn't happen...

1 Like

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Nobody: 4:33pm On Apr 28, 2017
A very tricky and delicate matter.we all have different views about it.
If not for civilisation and the present economy,who will allow his wife to work her ass off just to provide some dough for the family.may God make all men great men and financial providers for their families.

1 Like

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by tobaseye: 4:34pm On Apr 28, 2017
It looks like a movie but excuse me, it happens every day.

One of my friends was a victim of this, before she got married she had a good job, a car and a shop as a trained fashion designer. Most of her clients her from the office where she worked and others by referral.

When she got married she assists her husband to build on his land, as both had land before they got married. she even borrowed money from her mom in order to get the house completed on time.

After some months into the marriage her husband asked her to leave her pay job which she did purposely to respect her husband and save her marriage and she could not even operate her old shop because of distance from their new house and the shop, though she built a big shop in their new house that she planned to use.

But what did she get in return, she was kicked out of the house with a one year old child and an empty bank account. Not until then she realised that all that had transpired over the one year and few months of marriage was a product of envy.

I guess the guy couldn't withstand his wife earning more than him and he killed her career sent her out with an allegation that she was possessed.

Please ladies be wise, think well before you leave your job because of marriage. Be sure you are doing the right thing even if you have to do so.

5 Likes

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Nobody: 4:35pm On Apr 28, 2017
God will bless you and will never stop for this thread it is so common today for men to tell you to be patient while he is hustling to give another the Paris you were promised while you bravely soaked with him or even yet if you have your own you will insulted

I will say it's character at the end of the day you study humility comes with patience that you may even learn in your impatience and that's one thing we should never forget in a partnership how are they emotionally when you ask for things are they are angry do they want to destroy you if you can no longer provide and all you represent I say this because you could be loving your enemy and not even know because they are close in comfort.

Learn and never stop hoping to have a marraige that stands the test of time maybe with them you can't but honestly love is supportive in all aspects and not determined to cloud your success but promote and celebrate it

1 Like

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by neocortex: 4:39pm On Apr 28, 2017
Tallesty1:
The same long story.

Here you are, a lady that haven't met up 5% of Nigeria men and you're already ranting that 99% Nigeria men are insecure bla bla...

Well, she is wrong in making up unfounded statistics to back up her point but some
set of men who accuses women of bringing nothing to the table will still be the one
to cry foul if the wife becomes wealthier.




I don't know where this mentality is from but I have this to say about it.
Nigeria men are not scared of successful women rather they are scared of control freaks.
Here you commit the same offence as the lady you quoted, how many Nigerian men do you know
to make such a baseless generalisation.



The type of woman that only feels good about herself if she makes you feel less than her.
This trait is primarily a male one as you hardly find women who whine about not being in charge of
their home.



These are the women that my brothers are scared of. It is called being careful and not insecurity.
Please speak for yourself as you are not a standard of behaviour for all men.


And for your information, it isn't just Nigeria men, if a host of studies are to be believed, marrying these women(career women) is asking for trouble.

You are right insecure and possessive men are found everywhere in the world.



If they quit their jobs and stay home with the kids, they will be unhappy ( Journal of Marriage and Family, 2003).
You should have included the full reference here so that others can check. Mind you when a large segment
of women are working(60% are part of the workforce in the US), is it any surprise that those who are not
are less happier ?
It is called peer pressure and has nothing to do with gender but humans in general.



They will be unhappy if they make more money than you do ( Social Forces, 2006).

Since women wants control over everything as you claimed don't you think they should be ecstatic
that they make more money ?



You will be unhappy if they make more money than you do ( Journal of Marriage and Family, 2001).
You will be more likely to fall ill ( American Journal of Sociology).
It is normal for men who feel they are losing control of their home to feel unhappy.


Even your house will be dirtier ( Institute for Social Research).
Again context matters, please provide the full reference. But will you be surprised
that a full time housewife care more for her surroundings ?



Have you seen that it just isn't a Nigeria thing?
Of course it is not, but that doesn't make it right either.



Now can we the stats to back your ridiculous 99.9$ nonsense?
Of course her stat has no factual basis.



The same studies have found that professional women are more likely to get divorced, more likely to cheat, less likely to have children, and, if they do have kids, they are more likely to be unhappy about it.
Sorry to burst your bubble you just picked out a statement that support your
position and excluding the context, here is a part of the forbes article I presume you
referenced:

forbes: highly educated people are more likely to have had extra-marital sex," and "individuals who earn more than $30,000 a year are more likely to cheat."
So, if career women are bad marriage bets, so are career men.

And let me leave you with this rebuttal to your reference here:
Forbes' definition of a career woman is extraordinarily broad, including any woman who has a college education, works 35 hours a week, and makes more than $30,000. So, if you define non-career women as all the "undereducated" who work part-time and make less than $30K, it becomes painfully obvious why female careerists are more likely to divorce than non-careerists: They can better afford to get out of an unhappy marriage than their sisters.


Men are not scared of women with wealth, they're simply not ready for their endless troubles.

Nobody will willingly pierce his body with many sorrows.
At the bold, speak for yourself.


Now lemme bring it down to Nigeria women.

This is what happens when a guy asks for the hand of a rich girl in marriage.
Each member of the family will buy one Laser-Sharp Binoculars that can pierce through his flesh and bones and zoom the guy's soul to search his spirit to know if he's after the woman's wealth.

Even when the Binoculars reads negative, they still won't believe it, they will become very envious and are likely to disrespect the guy.

The guy have alota work to do to prove his not after their sister's money before they can respect him.....

Again, you paint a picture of all richer women based on a subjective observation.

When wealth disparity is obvious, this behaviour may be exhibited by the family whether in a man or woman
as people generally tend to marry within their social group and those who don't may be resisted by their in-laws.
Then I ask if someone isn't welcome in a family , why try to prove himself when he can just walk away ?



The mama will be like, "My daughter, that guy is after your money. He's not good for you, wait my dear, when a good guy comes I will tell you".

Who wants that?
The last time I checked women gets tagged as gold-diggers more often than men for obvious reasons.



Finally, these women, especially those working in an office or something of that nature do not know that there are things one needs to succeed in business and work.

These things are direct opposite of what we need to have successful marriage and most of these successful women do not know where to cut the line.

To succeed in business, you have to be stubborn, in control etc. Bring these things into your marriage and you are in trouble.
Some successful women would rather blow the house up and everything in it than compromise or take personal responsibility.



Who Wants This?
An easy way to solve this problem is to marry an housewife and maybe get a written agreement
that she will never go into business so that your ego won't be bruised.



Women Naturally want to exert control over everything. They enjoy to make those around them feel inadequate, insecure, nervous, angry, anxious and physically sick.
This is a false statement, control and dominance is the perogative of males,
some men can go to the extreme to exert control over their wife.
Are you aware that a third of women murders in the US is caused by their male partners ?
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/10/09/men-killing-women-domesti_n_5927140.html
And it is primarily for ego, ownership and control reasons. So women naturally wants control theory
does not hold water.



Go to married men that have richer wives and ask them, they will tell you that the message their women pass in everything they do is I don’t trust you to be able to do it right; I don’t respect your judgment; I don’t think you are competent; I don’t value your insight. I can do it all alone.
Again, you break your own rule can you point to any survey you did that confirm your position.
You should never have responded if you also believe in making wild assumptions about people
you know little about.



Stay Alone Then.
This is a choice any woman can make.


If you're rich and no man wants to marry you, it's because you're not good.

Stop consoling yourself with the Nigeria men are insecure around women with wealth.

Acquiring wealth doesn't mean you should get married automatically.
There are many broke single women out there and many rich women are getting married even as we talk.

Work on yourself.
It is as if you know her personally, but if you don't this is a misplaced advice as it
adds nothing to the discussion except to make your opponent look bad.




According the op, the women was sent parking because she was rich, and I ask, all these poor broke ladies that gets divorced all the time, is it their wealth that intimidated their husbands?

Because broke ladies got divorced doesn't mean a woman can't be sent parking because she is richer than her husband.
There are no rules on reason why divorce should occur. Someone could be divorced because of cheating while another
due to "lack of respect"or both, they are not always mutually exclusive.

So men should marry women that fits their description of a wife so as not
to end up as frustrated whiners who complain bitterly about how bad women are.

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Opynion: 4:41pm On Apr 28, 2017
GOD will not allow me bow down to my wife.

women with desire for control is like 5 & 6.

no money no woman
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Ceede: 4:44pm On Apr 28, 2017
Omotayor123:
I just witnessed a scene where a woman is sent packing from her matrimonial home because she's allegedly "using her husband STAR"
A Star that couldn't buy him a Bicycle before the Marriage.cheesy

Even if she was using the Said Star isn't it just better for her to Continuegrin

Jokes Apart,


This is the Gist:
The couple both work in a Big company But the wife is more financially stable compare to the husband. she's currently building a house with her husband supervising the whole thing. she got a car of recent in her husband's name but the family and the Society won't have any of these.

Her kindness have been turn to wickedness and she's being sent packing in a humiliating manner. (They have a kid)

Now, my question is:

When you were using your own star you can't afford a bike.
When your wife bought you a new car,you and your family said she is spiritually using your star.


Isn't it a Low self esteem If your wife's income and financial status is affecting your confidence as a man

If you Make her life miserable and not make her happy just because she's richer than you, does that not mean you were never in love with her.

Love is peace,not competition. Whoever makes more money shouldn't
be a problem as long as we knows and respects each other as husband and wife.....


What's your Take on This


op the action simply mean the villagers @work, a man who suppose to be using bicycle wants to use car, Taaa he must go back to villa n strt farming.
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Ade3000yrs(m): 4:44pm On Apr 28, 2017
Go to farm Nigerians! Operation Feed The Nation Mode Activated! An idle hand, mouth and mind is the devil's PlayStation 5 and Xbox Two! What every Nigerian home & abroad need right now is to look inward and go back to embrace Agriculture with gratitude and humility or shamefully like a dog licking his wound! In blood & Sweat, in Tears and Toil, A life outside Agric is a life on the edge, a life heading for the cliff, a precipitating thunder storm by the hints and darts of mist and frost!

The reason why Nigeria play partisan and kitchen politics among the electorates, political stake holders and the observers is the reason why the Nigeria educational institution is so dysfunctional and defunct that So far has only managed to produce just only Wole Soyinka as the only Nigerian Nobel laureate, South Africa has 10 Nobel laureates, Egypt has 4, Algeria has 2, Liberia has 2, Kenya has 1 and Ghana has 1.

Lately, with too many premonition, much of our attitude towards Agricultural practices has been an heist wrapped in spared subligarian adrifting a rock bottom, a befuddled dike outburst and an hog washed. In a proliterated troglodyte pillage of epical ascensions, we lampoon the affluence of privilege in a bumfuzzled Whiffler, a cattywampus flummoxed opinion, gobs smacked mugwump, kerfuffle. discombobulated, nonplussed shivoo, and a snollygoster in a diddly doodly squat. All our circumlocution are befuddled much like that of a wascally wabbits and like a Jacklope with a showdown of belligerent pogrom enveloped in an aboriginal days of infamy. Aside gaming words & delusions, lets all go back the humble path ways of agriculture. Even in the next 100 years from now, it will be the trending business for Nigerians. Remember it takes 30years of Consistency in Agriculture to be a Pro like the Dangote, or Obasanjo that you admire in your wishful thinking of wanting to be a billionaire. Therefore, this venture is not for pack of wolves, lazy vultures looking for free feast sites, and free catch for free money or con, ponzi and overnight money. If you have got no bones in your wings, shoulders and guts, then its high time you have backed out. There's dignity in Labour!
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by sisisioge: 4:47pm On Apr 28, 2017
As much as I love to have money and several successes, I would rather my husband have more. I really can't shout cheesy

If it turned out that I have more(I hope not obviously), then na to under quote myself remain grin.

Even after under quoting I still can't hide it, na to say na my sister get am remain. grin

All this trouble because an African man can't be trusted to see a wealthier wife as remaining his wife...his equal or at best, his second in command. I really can't shout, may God bless the husband with plenty money biko grin.
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Jman06(m): 4:51pm On Apr 28, 2017
Though i doubt the authenticity of this story, i'll still say that only a foolish man would send his wife away for being more financially successful. Those men who don't want their wives to work and earn a living do it most times for selfish reasons, yet some lazy ass girls here would not see the ulterior motive. It is all about subjugating the woman so that the man could cheat with different women and the wife will be left with no option but stay and take what the man does to her. That's inprisonment, not love. It does not show that the man takes care of his wife. A man who will take care of you will do even when you are richer. There are many men who are rich, yet their shishi would not fall out to take care of their wives' personal needs, while some men would spend their last card to care for their richer wives and still give her some warm wassage when they are back from work.

That's why i advise ladies to marry good men who sincerely care for them.

1 Like

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by ThatDeek: 4:54pm On Apr 28, 2017
Bumbae1:
Whats wrong with the woman being the rich one
Shebi na same thing
some men hate it
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Nobody: 4:54pm On Apr 28, 2017
ThatDeek:
some men hate it
Yh starting to notice this too
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by ThatDeek: 4:55pm On Apr 28, 2017
Bumbae1:
Yh starting to notice this too
i'd rather tap the blessing from wifey
Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by blesoh(f): 4:57pm On Apr 28, 2017
firstking01:
Wow, wish yua in ph woulda come take yhu owttongue...Btw, yhu got kiLLer curvestongue.
@ Mynd44 God bless you sir. U ll marry a good wife if u are not married yet.
Some men think, Women are slaves that needs to be ordered around.

1 Like

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Jman06(m): 4:57pm On Apr 28, 2017
Safiaa:
Shut up. Did i say all men? I said most.
Even the 'most' is not true!

1 Like

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by Jman06(m): 4:59pm On Apr 28, 2017
Safiaa:
Shut up. Did i say all men? I said most.
Even your 'most' is not true!

1 Like

Re: When Your Wife Is Richer Than You by firstking01(m): 5:02pm On Apr 28, 2017
blesoh:

God bless you sir. U ll marry a good wife if u are not married yet.
Some men think, Women are slaves that needs to be ordered around.
Wow, what did i post to deserve such a an accolade and a fulfilling prayer shocked

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (Reply)

Lovely Photo Of Couple Kissing But Their Baby Does Not Show One Bit Of Interest / I Became A "Baby Daddy" After My Dad Questioned My Ability To Impregnate Woman / Nigerian Man Videos His Baby Mama Harassing His Mother In U.S, & She Sets Him Up

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 85
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.