AbujaLover:
Hello Nairalanders. Pls I want to share my love story with you. I'm a christian and there is this my high school friend that we grew fond of each while in high school, we had been "just friends".

While in SS3, I was a prefect and she was my assistant. This gave us more time together, back then we never thought of romance, we were just the "serious type" always discussing our studies and helping each other. We were best of friends.

It was during the last days at High School that we realised how attached we had grown to each other, I remember we talked about how we will miss each other in a 'friendly' manner while taking a walk round the school.

In those days, I realised I had more feelings than friendship towards her but I do tell my self that it was just infatuation that once we leave each other, the feeelings will die off and I will perhaps meet someone else.

Four years down the line, we still can't let go of each other, we usually only talked on phone and social media not until some months ago that I decided to pay her a visit in her home.

The visit was so nostalgic, we were delighted to see each other but we both kept on hiding our feelings. I think we are both pretending not to feel anything beyond friendship. This is because of differences in our religion.

I met with her dad, an Alhaji, that day, and we also discussed Nigeria and the waxing hardship, I sense he was quite liberal. Maybe that's because I and his daughter were "just friends".

Now, our calls usually starts well but ends cold, when it's time to say goodbye, we are both pretending towards each other. I know, and I think she knows also.

If we had been of the same religion, I would have made my feelings known to her but I just can't summon the courage to do so now. Our differences in religion didnot stop me from loving her but stopping me from having her.

I would like your suggestions. Have you ever been in such situation before? How did you do it?

Pls I want mature suggestions.

Thanks in advance.

My candid advice is you try it first. Am speaking from experience. My wife today was once a Muslim and a daughter to an Alhaji and Alhaja.

Told her my feelings for her and we started dating. Mind you, it's not every relationship that must end in marriage. Some are meant to make you better.

After dating for a while, we talked about it and she agreed to convert.

Now she's a Christian and we are married. The funniest thing is that her mum also converted to Christian and also her elder sister.

AbujaLover:


Thanks bro. I will ponder on your questions.

If your answer is yes, pls proceed. It's the very best. Being free to all. This will make you not think a faith is superior to another. This will make you see and view people from their personality first instead of their faiths. Matter of fact, it will make you live longer.

Diagnose all the necessary variables.
History shows many that works well and many that fails.

how we go come do with this matter?Abeg who get pin mouth blackberry charger?

ImaIma1:
Hmmm...well in your case you are the guy snd she might end up becoming a Christian. But if she doesn't, there will be differences and clashed. Love is not enough to sustain a marriage. So you have to project fivd yrs down the line...ten years... . I was in love with a muslim guy at one point abd I saw in him a lot of things i wanted in a husband. But i thought about a lot of things like how would we bring up the children...will they be torn between being Christian or Muslim...would my husband and I be able to pray together...etc. and i knew i was never going to convert and so I moved on.
The moral of my story...weigh all the options before making ur decision.

You have heard the real facts frm the poeple wit exprnce, is u come back as muslim or no marriage

AbujaLover:


Thanks bro. at the bolded; I was quoting a parts of a Bible verse.

yeah, but interpretations should be guided by the Holy Spirit...have you not also come across the bible portion where God spoke to Peter in a trance, which had a cloth of different beasts and reptiles and all sorts, asking him to rise, kill and eat? Peter said he would not touch any unclean thing, buh God responded by saying he had cleansed them and he should eat? shortly after Peter went to an unbeliever's house, had communion with them and thus saved a whole household? e go be bros. peace.

Abujalover. Pls Dnt Just Try It, Love Is Never Enough. U Been A Christian And Her Been A Muslim Its Gonna Be Tough. Had Same Experience 2014, Bt Just Moved On With My Life, Tho We Are Still Frnds Oh!!!

My guy you're wasting time.. Tell her Jor.. Sorry for you if not the next visit you will pay her is in are husband house.. Remember say Aboki nor they waste time for marriage..

I don't think u should continue wz this, am sorry if I sound blunt, but d fact is Islamically a Muslim lady is not allowed to marry a none Muslim. u may b in love, but ur marriage could hv implications as thus: 1. u convert to Islam, or 2. ur lady converting to xtian 3. u marry maintaining ur faiths. In 1-3 u may b having serious issues wz ur both families . I think u should drop d idea n maintain a friendly relationship

shaddoww:
1corinthians 7 vs 12-16
To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?
Normally, Yorubas don't have problem doing inter-religious marriage but dis days things as changed, people now put religion on their head, if u were d lady, it may b difficult convincing ur parent, bt as d guy n being being xtrian, I don't think u will av a problem convincing ur parent but the problem now is hw do u convince d gal' parent?
I know of some people married to d other religion n doing fine.
1. Asiwaju Bola Hammed Tinubu
2. Babatunde Raji Fashola
3. Folorunsho Alakija
4. Ibikunle Amosun
5. Abdul Fatai Hammed etc

Ahmed or Ahmad na em be hammed


And hammed is other name entirely




I tire for Afonja people.


Even the muslims didn't know better.

her religion is not an issue. go for it.

Hi,

Your story was quite similar to mine. I lost out on her because her dad clearly rebuked me not to visit her daughter again. "That, the moment we parted ways in secondary school, we have parted for life". Presently, she's married to a believer with 3 beautiful kids, and she's a believer now. She told me l should have been more persistent, perhaps her dad would have supported eventually, which he did with her husband. She said her husband and late dad were very good friends before her dad's death.

Kindly express your heart intentions to her, ask her questions regarding issues relating to her conversion (mustn't be forced please), and raising the kids. If her response is positive in regards to conversion, and she's willing to stand by you - kindly go ahead. However, if she says no to conversion, it would definitely affect how your kids would be raised, in terms of spiritual allegiance. At this point, l would advise there's no point forging ahead.

Aside that, don't forget to do your findings on her family's background please, before you take the major step of securing her heart. I pray God leads you aright. Take care !

The road you are about to tread is a delicate one. Pls i know what it takes because I am a product of such a marriage. My mother Christian married my dad a muslim. The problem is not only my father as at the time but my fathers family. It was HELL on earth for both my mother and we the children.

by the grace of God we are able to survive but it is still hunting us till date for what we should have achieved years back is what we are now pursuing at this age.

It affected every aspect of our life negatively.

Bro pls think seriously before you leap.
It may or may not be your case.

Serious thinking bro for the sake of the unborn children.

KingEbukasBlog:
A lot of reasonable people will tell you that it is proper that people who do not share the same religious beliefs should not get married because of the expected corollaries we have witnessed . But there are instances like Mark Zuckerberg (practicing Jew) and his wife Priscilla Chan (Buddhist) and I've got two friends who have Muslim dads and Christian moms - we can see from these instances that the foundation of those marriages is built on love . Love begets religious tolerance and precludes religious bigotry .

Mark Zuckerberg is born a Jewish but not a practicing Jews(Judaism).

Religion, tribe are barriers for two lovers to have each other and parents are also the cause most times.

ollah1:



See another demented foool

Say whatever you like,Truth is always bitter.

if you tell them to stop watching romance film, them won't listen e.g telemundo zee world! how can the relationship ever work,it will look more like a divided family than united, i didn't say man ooo!for the sake of unity in your future family, snap out of it!also remember couple who pray together remains together ,united in love and stick together,obviously you won't be able to pray together

OGA JUST MOVE ON B4 YOU END UP WITH A HEART ACHE. This relationship will never work in real life. Unless ofcourse its a movie. then you get a happily ever after

bro make your intention known to her, my cousin married an alhajis daughter, this one her father has a big mosque in his compound, the father agreed, but they did a nikkai marriage which was the father's wish, they are happily married with kids now,

livinbygrace:


Say whatever you like,Truth is always bitter.

Truth is different from jargons. The latter is what you wrote.

Pangolo123:
Hi,

Your story was quite similar to mine. I lost out on her because her dad clearly rebuked me not to visit her daughter again. "That, the moment we parted ways in secondary school, we have parted for life, says her dad" Presently, she's married to a believer with 3 beautiful kids, and she's a believer now. She told me l should have been more persistent, perhaps her dad would have supported eventually, which he did with her husband. She said her husband and late dad were very good friends before her dad's death.

Kindly express your heart intentions to her, ask her questions regarding issues relating to her conversion (mustn't be forced please), and raising the kids. If her response is positive in regards to conversion, and she's willing to stand by you - kindly go ahead. However, if she says no to conversion, it would definitely affect how your kids would be raised, in terms of spiritual allegiance. At this point, l would advise there's no point forging ahead.

Aside that, don't forget to do your findings on her family's background please, before you take the major step of securing her heart. I pray God leads you aright. Take care !

Thanks bro for your reply.

AbujaLover. A marriage between a Muslim man and a Christian woman is acceptable while A marriage between a Christian man and a Muslim woman is not permissible.

Timoodi:
if you tell them to stop watching romance film, them won't listen e.g telemundo zee world! how can the relationship ever work,it will look more like a divided family than united, i didn't say man ooo!for the sake of unity in your future family, snap out of it!also remember couple who pray together remains together ,united in love and stick together,obviously you won't be able to pray together

Chris oyakilome and okotie prayed together with their respective wives and even wrote books and councelled people. What ended their affairs?

In most / all the cases you've listed the MAN is the Muslim. Islam allows a Muslim man to marry out (as I have read in various commentaries).

Islam doesn't encourage Muslim females to marry out as it seems.

shaddoww:
1corinthians 7 vs 12-16
To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?
Normally, Yorubas don't have problem doing inter-religious marriage but dis days things as changed, people now put religion on their head, if u were d lady, it may b difficult convincing ur parent, bt as d guy n being being xtrian, I don't think u will av a problem convincing ur parent but the problem now is hw do u convince d gal' parent?
I know of some people married to d other religion n doing fine.
1. Asiwaju Bola Hammed Tinubu
2. Babatunde Raji Fashola
3. Folorunsho Alakija
4. Ibikunle Amosun
5. Abdul Fatai Hammed etc

Go ahead if you know your love is strong enough. I am a living withness, am a Muslim and I married to a pastor's daughter and to God be the Glory we are still waxing stronger.

AbujaLover:


You get it bro, it's like torture. My fear actually is how will it work? I guess, We are going to have clashes in philosophies due to differences in religion. We are both attached to our religions, but I'm surprised I can't obey the law that "do not be unevenly attached to unbelievers". Love trully has no boundaries, if we are to be sincere with ourselves.

Thanks for your reply..I really appreciate it.

See, I was in this situation for years. We dated for about four years and it wasn't easy. Till now, I'm still hung over that lady like kilode. But, this isn't language barrier. This is religious. And I'll tell you the truth, this isn't something to just ignore. Because trust me, it's much easier for a Christian lady to convert. Muslims hardly ever do so. And that will always bring problems between you two.

See me the power of love. this is the first time Nigerians are sharing views without name calling or bashing.
In fact eh. Gov't should pay #5 million to any couples willing to marry from another tribe (and religion) to heal the
divide. You see? Tribalism is a learnt behaviour. Politicians na bastards.
Meanwhile, God Bless Nigeria!

I won't even allow that love to see the light of the day, unless his religion is unknown to me at that point in time, there is more to marriage than love, Love is what we see most times, can fly away anytime, the ones you nurture stands..#bewise

truth be told, the parents of the girl will not consent to you marrying their daughter. it is against their religion for the female partner to marry outside the religion but as for the male, they are permitted to marry from a different faith.

light does not have anything to do with darkness, Christians shouldn't mingle with those muslims, take a look around the world and see all the atrocities attached to them. Its very dangerous.

KingEbukasBlog:
A lot of reasonable people will tell you that it is proper that people who do not share the same religious beliefs should not get married because of the expected corollaries we have witnessed . [s]But there are instances like Mark Zuckerberg (practicing Jew) and his wife Priscilla Chan (Buddhist[/s]) and I've got two friends who have Muslim dads and Christian moms - we can see from these instances that the foundation of those marriages is built on love . Love begets religious tolerance and precludes religious bigotry .

But as a Christian do you think you handle the downside of that ? Consider your spiritual growth as a family . And your kids . Which religion will they belong to ? Mum's or dad's ? Or will you give them the freedom to choose theirs ? My friend goes to both Church and the Mosque - can you handle this level of confusion ? And of course , the heated arguments that'd ensue because of your religious differences . People can be very passionate about their religious beliefs . What about religious holidays ? Would you be comfortable with your spouse's religious holiday celebrations ? Would you join her to celebrate ? What if you don't? Can you handle her repulsive reactions and the awkward moments ?

where did you see mark zuckernerg being a practising Jew you this boy

bro jst make ur feelns knw to her. we dnt even knw if she loves u. U re jst assuming she loves u. Girls can be confusing. Make ur feelns knwn nd hear her response. afterall, not all relationships leads to marriage