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Stats: 1,948,255 members, 4,040,168 topics. Date: Monday, 22 January 2018 at 11:26 AM
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by ehmusshogun(m): 6:17pm On Jul 26, 2017|
Centino:yea I searched for a new update last sunday but couldn't find it. keep it up and constant boss
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 10:34am On Jul 27, 2017|
Will try man! Thanks.
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by drewsman(m): 5:08pm On Jul 27, 2017|
Centino:one of ur followers here man
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 12:41pm On Jul 28, 2017|
Welcome drewsman. At your service.
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 1:52pm On Jul 30, 2017|
I strode back out to meet the newspaper gang where I left them. The compound was now fully alive as you would expect on a Saturday morning. Children were running around with tooth brushes and tiny towels around their waists, parents were stretching their lungs to get them back in line, and there were others carrying pots and pans and dirty laundry and dishes to and from the backyard. I saw Willy-willy brandishing a transparent nylon with six eggs and bouncing to their self-contained like the prince of Persia showing off his gold. Saturday morning fried eggs was a constant in their home, and the six boys always made sure the rest of the compound never forgot how well they lived. There were a few new faces about, but that was not unexpected. This is number 225 Katakata Street.
“Diezani stole ninety billion dollars”. Mr Zubi said and shook his head.
“That is even more money than Bill Gates has” Akunna said.
“And she get cancer abi?” Josiah said.
“Last I heard, yes” Mr Zubi said.
“Lucky woman” Josiah said.
“And how is that lucky?”
“She is among the privileged few who know when they will die. So she will enjoy what she can of her stolen money, settle her family to the 20th generation while checking with her doctor how much time she has, then in the final moments, she go just give her life to Christ then go heaven straight.”
“Ehn? Lai lai!”
“What is lai lai? I dey lie? Is that not what the bible says? That if we repent we will be forgiven everything? The woman lucky abeg.”
“I don’t like the sound of that at all. It is unfair. The likes of her should rot in hell. Did you see Aremu Afolayan’s rant on instagram? I stand by him. God will punish her, her mother and all those that are eating the money with her.”
“That is your opinion. If she repents, it will all be washed away and she will be as white as snow.”
“So why won’t I go and steal and get away from this hole and then repent and go to heaven?”
“You will never get close to that kind of money, and you are too stupid to be an armed robber. At best you can go to the councilor’s house and steal his shoes,” Mr Zubi said.
“Something is not right about that doctrine. I can feel it in my soul,” Akunna mused. “She was feeding fat from oil swap deals as the papers say. Because of that, our refineries were never going to work. My cousin that worked at the Port Harcourt refinery is now a pauper because people like Diezani ensured they were sent back home for redundancy. That kind of money would not only keep our refineries alive, it would build a new one in every local government in this country. Not to talk of roads, hospitals, and so many jobs!”
“Can I say something?” It was Mr Cosmas that spoke. We all fell silent. We did not know what was coming, but we were sure he was going to throw our faith in our faces once again.
“Josiah,” he began, “Think about Akunna’s cousin in Port-Harcourt who has been made hungry by this woman. Imagine that one day out of desperation he goes to the market and steals some garri to feed his family, then the following day he dies without remembering to repent, will it be fair for him to be sent to hell and Diezani to heaven because she repented?”
“One is stealing, the other is corruption. Goodluck Jonathan said they are not the same thing.” Josiah said.
Mr Cosmas ignored the remark and said “Akunna, you say your soul tells you the doctrine is wrong. Guess what, your soul is right. How can we say God is just if people steal billions and impoverish millions and in the end utter a few words of repentance and go to heaven? And the people they impoverish are sent to hell for becoming desperate to survive?”
“What nonsense soul is telling him what? Do you question God? Do you question His word? His ways are not our ways. You cannot understand spiritual things thinking in the flesh.”
“Hmmm, so what are you saying Mr Cosmas?” Akunna said.
“God cannot be mocked. Whatsoever a man soweth, so shall he reap. She will pay for it. If not in this life, in another one.”
“I said it! I knew this was where this was leading. You don come again Cosmas. It is appointed unto man to die once!”
“If it were so, then the Almighty will not be just. Akunna, if your intuition tells you what you believed is not right, you are on track. Seek and ye shall find.”
“I am not sitting down here and listening to this rubbish. I did not say that what Diezani did was right, but we cannot judge her. I believe that if she repents she will be saved. All this one you are saying now I know you read from those demonic books wey you dey carry. Be careful Cosmas. Repent before it is too late. I dey go. Make una stay there make dem pollute una mind.”
“The problem with closed-minded people is that their mouth is always open.”
We all turned and saw that Mr Kingsley had joined us. He never took part in our gathering unless he was invited. Even then it was only for the compound meetings.
“Who said that, Mr. Kingsley?” I said before I could stop myself.
“Don’t be surprised bros Freke. There is nothing a woman’s food cannot do.” It was Irikefe. He must have been following Mr Kingsley. “Tonight, bros” he said with a wink and jumped the gutter and went down the street.
TO BE CONTINUED.
5 Likes 1 Share
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Frankenstein: 8:58pm On Jul 30, 2017|
Your narration is excellent. Very vivid descriptions. Keep it up, Centino.
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by drewsman(m): 8:20am On Jul 31, 2017|
excellent write up Mr centino
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Kimkardashain(f): 9:29am On Jul 31, 2017|
oga oh, i don laff tire,
kimberlyWest, queenitee, marianneada, mhizgap, Evajael, girlharley, Darkcrisp, jagugu88li oya cum oh
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 12:04pm On Jul 31, 2017|
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 12:05pm On Jul 31, 2017|
Thank you drewsman
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 12:06pm On Jul 31, 2017|
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by jagugu88li(f): 12:55pm On Jul 31, 2017|
Kimkardashain:I dey here ooo. What am I being called for?
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 10:11am On Aug 01, 2017|
Hi jagugu88li, I think Kimkardashain believes you will like my story. I hope so.
kimberlyWest, queenitee, marianneada, mhizgap, Evajael, girlharley, Darkcrisp...titans of the literary section, come take a look.
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by EvaJael(f): 10:13am On Aug 01, 2017|
Centino:Lol @ titans. Lemme read first sha
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by EvaJael(f): 10:39am On Aug 01, 2017|
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by EvaJael(f): 10:39am On Aug 01, 2017|
Centino you've got a new reader here. Love it plenty
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 3:10pm On Aug 01, 2017|
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by EvaJael(f): 3:19pm On Aug 01, 2017|
Centino:Uwc. Between I'm a small girl o
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 1:11am On Aug 02, 2017|
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 1:23pm On Aug 06, 2017|
THE SEX TAPE
The following morning Irikefe walked up to me where I stood by the gutter brushing my teeth and said “Bros, I have the tape.”
“What tape again?”
“Sister Esther and The Undertaker last night.”
“You are joking right? I said and spat a dollop of toothpaste foam with phlegm into the gutter and it landed with a splatter. I rinsed my mouth with the water I held in a plastic cup and spat again and then faced Irikefe.
“Bros since you came to this compound, have I ever said I will do something and not do it? Or have I ever given you information that is not authentic? I am the Prince here. Conceived, born, bred, buttered, riced and beansed in number 225. Nothing escapes my attention.”
“No be only riced and beansed. What of amala and ewedued in number 225?”
Irikefe laughed out loud and threw his head back without a care in the world while displaying a set of perfect dentition. He then pulled out his phone from his pocket and caressed it in his palm. He looked around like a thief about to remove a chicken from its roost and said “tell me you are not eager to watch.”
He smiled as I tried to conceal my excitement and said “Let’s go to your room. This place is not safe.”
I led him back through the corridor and we entered the room I shared with my cousin. We both sat on the bed – a six by four feet mattress on cold linoleum dressed with the wrapper my mother gave me as I packed for Lagos.
Irikefe dipped his hand in his pocket but hesitated.
“Show me nau?” I said. He then held up the phone and fiddled with it and then said “oya, see.”
I looked at the still black screen with indecipherable humming sound as irikefe watched me.
“What is this?”
“That is the show na. Can’t you hear Sister Esther speaking in tongues? The Undertaker is even quoting Songs of Solomon.”
“I can’t see or hear a thing.”
“That is because there was no light.”
“But that is the point Irikefe. How can you make a video in the dark? And even if you had made an actual video, what would you do with it? What is the point?”
“I will use it to make money from them.”
“How can you even think of that?”
“I am now a yahoo boy. I don’t care.”
“So you want to start your criminal life with blackmailing your neighbors?”
“Charity begins at home bros.”
“Well, sorry you have started woefully. There is nothing on this so called tape of yours.”
“They will not know that. My night vigil will not go in vain. I was by the window till they took light by twelve thirty. I then came round and entered the corridor and waited to make sure I saw The Undertaker sneak into her room. As long as they slept together, they will believe I have a tape.”
“It was dark irikefe.”
“I will tell them I recorded it using anti-darkness infrared technology.”
“What the hell is that?”
“I don’t know bros. It just entered my head. Sister Esther only knows what the Bible says. I will tell her that I can put it on a special device and the world will see her holy behind being polished by a heathen.”
“Mr Kingsley will not buy this.”
“I am not going to him. He will even be glad there is wahala. That will be a good excuse to dump her. He is tired of the whole thing.”
“And how do you know that?”
“I know everything bros.”
“So you want Sister Esther to give you money?”
Something like that. I know she is poor like the rest of us. But I can be getting something to be buying data for my business. Either that or I go to her pastor with the tape.”
“Do you know her pastor?”
“She once took me to him for deliverance.”
“Obviously it did not work.”
Irikefe chucked and I could see he was enjoying my discomfort.
“Bros, one needs to be wise in this Lagos. With time, I will keep a big bowl with her. When she finishes cooking, after serving The Undertaker she will serve me too.”
“You will eat rat poison.”
“Hehehe it’s a chance I’m willing to take.”
TO BE CONTINUED.
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|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by AyamConfidence(m): 5:46pm On Aug 06, 2017|
this last update got me laughing out loud
sex video in the dark....na wa ooo
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 6:46am On Aug 07, 2017|
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Frankenstein: 7:37pm On Aug 07, 2017|
Nice twist at the ending. Teach me how you narrate so well. Good work, Centino.
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by jagugu88li(f): 7:50pm On Aug 07, 2017|
This is one story I never finish even 1 update reading....... If my neighbour's house was closeby, they would accuse me of witchcraft......from laughing.
I AM A FOLLOWER OF CENTINO
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Frankenstein: 8:00pm On Aug 07, 2017|
jagugu88li:You don't like the story
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by jagugu88li(f): 8:14pm On Aug 07, 2017|
Frankenstein:No dear. I meant, it is too funny I cant even manage to finish an update without feeling like I am an extreme wierdo.....laughing alone
Adesina12 yorhmienerd purityval lleigh queenitee ROYH
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Frankenstein: 8:21pm On Aug 07, 2017|
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by do4luv14(m): 9:18am On Aug 08, 2017|
Lolzzz you no go kill peson with laughter oooo,
"" abti-darkness infra tech """
chaiii sombodi call HON PATRICK mak im come see grammar oooo
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by jagugu88li(f): 9:28am On Aug 08, 2017|
do4luv14:That's were I died
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by do4luv14(m): 9:33am On Aug 08, 2017|
abeg abeg wake up for me ooo, las-las
we go go visit Esther for prayer
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by jagugu88li(f): 9:38am On Aug 08, 2017|
do4luv14:The same Esther who is a crook. She wakes early in the morning and to haunt our destiny then sheepishly go back to sleep.....after waking up the entire Katakata
|Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by do4luv14(m): 9:49am On Aug 08, 2017|
she no fit haunt our destiny, cos oluwa don seal our destiny wit his word, no bodi can change it, Amen
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