soberdrunk:
16) "SHE TREATS HIS FRIENDS WITH RESPECT AND HONORS THEM"-------You cannot expect me to advice my friend to leave a woman that treats me with respect, puts '2-4' pieces of meat in my food and always has a welcoming smile unlike you that serves me food with '1meat' and gives me attitude when i visit my guy..........

Lets be realities and be fair to our partners..

To be sincere, How much do you give your wife to cook for u and ur children and how much do u give ur mistress to cook for only You

haske7:
I am sorry I have to admit this but my fellow women this is so true.....

Lies that unsuspecting women swallow.
If you like, have the body of Kim Kardashian and the face of the most beautiful girl in the world but a man that will cheat will cheat

dominique:
Yet another dumb write-up pinning the blame of philandering men on their wives. NOTHING JUSTIFIES INFIDELITY. It takes two to make a marriage work, not just the woman only. God forbid I go out of my way to try and please a cheating horseband. Every time women are given tip after tip on how to how to be a good wife "keep her husband", when will men start getting such tips? Oh! I forgot, keeping the marriage is the sole responsibility of the woman. The man can misbehave as he likes, when he knows he's being prayed for. Rubbish!

Men are getting too indiscipline and irresponsible in this part of the world these days. They know they won't be held responsible for their idiotic habits, because of idiotic write-ups like this.

I feel you. Why does the woman solely have to "keep the marriage"? Isn't it a contract of two people? A real husband will look for a way to make life easier for the woman so that she can take care of herself instead of going out to cheat with a flimsy excuse.

Some ladies are here sayingit is true.

When the pucci is sweet, you ask for more
But biko nt with someone's husband, God forbid
The day I realise you have a woman legally in your custody, I back off
There are several sweet dick / guys around, I no fit allow one dick to send me to early grave

Avalon316:


So what consequences are you proposing for men who cheat? Death by hanging? Why is so difficult for women of these generation to admit that men are polygamous (just like the girls in their teen) and a pussy can't Satisfy a man. The earlier they understand this,the better.

If you want to feel better, you can go on with the "men are dogs" rant. It's allowed.

The same reason I won't advise any married woman to be faithful to her cheating husband. He cheats, I cheat and the other men even spend much more on me than he does. I take good care of myself and have time for my child. Most times when he's caught in his Web of lies, I shake it off.

What he does doesn't bother me any more unlike before since I now have someone better than him. So why should a woman pray hard and die of high blood pressure over a cheating husband when there's always another man interested in her? Just that some women don't want to cheat but the truth is that most of those other men interested in her are more caring than her cheating husband.

IamKashyBaby:






Hahahaha...i will make sure i will always have the last card

GratefulHeart23:


The same reason I won't advise any married woman to be faithful to her cheating husband. He cheats, I cheat and the other men even spend much more on me than he does. I take good care of myself and have time for my child. Most times when he's caught in his Web of lies, I shake it off.

What he does doesn't bother me any more unlike before since I now have someone better than him. So why should a woman pray hard and die of high blood pressure over a cheating husband when there's always another man interested in her? Just that some women don't want to cheat but the truth is that most of those other men interested in her are more caring than her cheating husband.

please let's cheat together whenever the need arises

askseunoladele:
WHY YOUR HUSBAND IS CRAZY ABOUT HIS MISTRESS AND IS NOT READY TO LET HER GO...

I do not support an affair. Singles can also learn to prevent future adultery. But here are are the possible reasons your husband is crazy about his mistress and is not ready to let her go...

1. SHE LISTENS TO HIM while you are busy attending to the children, the chores, the business and forget that he even exists. You ignore him a lot and sometimes shout at him!

2. SHE RESPECTS, SUBMITS TO HIM AND TOTALLY ADORES HIM: She hangs to his words like the words of divinity. Celebrates him, admire him, praises him silly and is very fond of him.

3. SHE IS ROMANTIC: She goes completely crazy for him. While you are calling him by his first name or "baba Bayo", she gives him a sweet pet name and coos all those sweet nothings: "I love you", "I'm crazy for you...", "wanna die for you honey", "you are the sweetest, cutest thing in my world, etc." Into his ears.

4. SHE BUILDS HIS SEXUAL FANTASIES, she knows how to turn him on. Men are crazy for wives who turn them on.

5. SHE IS PASSIONATE IN BED. Come on, while you are lying down there like a log of wood completely dis-interested, she takes charge in bed! Energetic, passionate, wild, sweet to touch, versatile, switch into different styles like a pro and makes your husband scream her name over and over again. She makes sex so delicious he practically thinks about her 24/7.

6. SHE IS GETTING SLIMMER WHILE YOU ARE GETTING FATTER. Your husband hate the fat though he is not telling you.

7. SHE NEVER SAYS NO TO SEX. She is eager and ready any time, Mayday, any how, any where!

8. SHE SMELLS GOOD while you ooze body odour from morning till night.

8. SHE SHAVES AND IS SPARKLING CLEAN FROM HEAD TO TOE. You are bushy and dirty.

9. SHE TREATS HIM LIKE A LOVER BOY YET RESPECT HIM. You treat him like a grand dad and stop being romantic. She brings out the boy in him and play with him excitedly. At 50, she makes him feel 25. Men are completely crazy for women who play with them.

10. SHE PACKAGES HER BODY LIKE A SWEET SIXTEEN while you always dress like his great grand mother.

11. SHE IS GENEROUS while you are stingy.

12. SHE BELIEVES IN HIM, you despise him.

13. SHE PRAISES HIM, you despise and abuse him.

14. SHE SERVES HIM DELICIOUS FOOD WITH VARIERIES, your food is bland, tasteless and lacks variety.

15. SHE IS ALWAYS HAPPY TO SEE HIM, HEAR HIM ON PHONE AND EAGERLY WAIT FOR AND SEND HIM CHATS while you ignore him at the door after a hard day work at the office...

These and more are the reasons your husband is madly in love with his mistress and is not ready to let her go.

Once again, I do mot support an affair but trust me, if your dear hubby is not getting satisfied at home, there is a tendency to fall into temptation out there.

Some women complain they've done everything they knew how to do, yet their husbands still chase his mistress. Trust me baby, you've not done EVERYTHING you need to do. There are still MORE to do to get your husband back. It is not only sex a man wants in a mistress, he wants much more that he is lacking at home, find out and deal with it.

You are in real competition with the LovePeddler! Don't let her win. If she uses charm, you add prayer to your weapons and in no time you win your husband back. Read HIS NEEDS, HER NEEDS (How to build an affair proof marriage) by Gary Chapman, it will help you a lot. You will not lose your husband to another woman in Jesus name.I love you so much baby. Keep working at it. Feel free to share. God bless you. Cheers!
© Seun Oladele, 2017.
www.askseunoladele..com

The problem is that she is using jaaruma goron tula

Would you kindly drop your Wifey's numbered here,so,guys can say hi to her over WhatsApp?

Billyonaire:
Wife is wife, girlfriend is girlfriend.

Wife can not act like a girlfriend for several reasons. She helped psychologically to build the Kingdom while girlfriend takes the stress away.

The mistake we make is thinking that sexual love should be restricted to a permanent partner, well that is what religions say, except for Islam. I am not religious, so I am objective in my opinions, I just study nature and act in accordance with nature.

In real life, naturally, let us be very frank with ourselves, we all feel the longing to be with another person. It is our animal nature, our animal instinct. So, restricting ourselves to one person and resisting the beautiful attraction to another person is a major cause of our unhappiness in marriages.

Like I said, Wife is wife and girlfriend is girlfriend. We must draw that line and take care of both women to the best of our ability.

truthsayer009:

reverse cow girl? Biko, what are we reversing
bath tub, car, garage, kitchen, dining room? Hian God have mercy on you
But only on the sofa is Okay and acceptable.

God have mercy on me and you.

edeXede:


Iya Shakura needs to come and read this. I have forgotten she doesn't even know how to open a webpage.

Rose do all these things you mention,she makes me regret ever marrying iya shukura.

And my wife can snore for Africa

Lol! I just remembered edeXede remi koni iya............ In the early 90's

Dollyak:
This thread is a spectacular failure. The hypocrisy of Nigerian men is nauseous.

Hypocrisy is not gender-tied. It's common to both males and females.

GratefulHeart23:


The same reason I won't advise any married woman to be faithful to her cheating husband. He cheats, I cheat and the other men even spend much more on me than he does. I take good care of myself and have time for my child. Most times when he's caught in his Web of lies, I shake it off.

What he does doesn't bother me any more unlike before since I now have someone better than him. So why should a woman pray hard and die of high blood pressure over a cheating husband when there's always another man interested in her? Just that some women don't want to cheat but the truth is that most of those other men interested in her are more caring than her cheating husband.

A lot of women do cheat, but would rather die than admit it.
Men have been raising bastards since time immemorial, and it's not a recent development. In fact, if DNA is done on people on here, some people will be hospitalised to find out daddy is not father.
Infact, some women are so in tune with their lovers, they would purposely get pregnant for him and allow their husbands to raise the child. Only them would know the truth, and would not even let the real father/boyfriend know the pregnancy is his, as that would complicate issues.

It's a pity though, that threads like this advocates cheating in a marriage, and the poster thinks it's only addressed to the woman, not knowing it's further giving many women who read it a licence to also cheat on their partner.
There was a thread about a man who caught his wife cheating, and the thing is killing him slowly. The word here is CAUGHT.
Anyway, let everyone be chopping and cleaning mouth.

I know everyone will be true to themselves. There are some people who have enough self control not to cheat on their husbands and wives, not because of their gender or even because of their partners perfection, but rather because they cannot compromise their standards.

only a useless he goat ll do that...do u know wat women go thru after child bearing to raise kids....a loving man shld always help put d kids to sleep n wen he cant keep loving n appreciating s jewel God has given him...loving men ll even create time fr vacations n all..plus u want her to look sexy wat stops u from changing her wardrobe huh??

frenzyduchess:
nah,i don't need to rant it, I have seen men who truly are dogs and men who aren't, so I cant say "all",cos a few have worked hard to discipline themselves, and it will be a great injustice for me to classify them with the weak ones. Women of this generation only refused to be like their grandmas. I hear people say why can't this generation be like their grandmas, hell no, I don't want to be like my grandma, Infact I have sat down and listened to my grandma say things she went through,so I don't wanna be like her ,thank you. Every human being should be held accountable for their actions, if a man decides to let his weakness rule him, that should be on him and no one else. You think only men get tired of having sex with just one partner?, Hahahahaha, women do too, but we are more disciplined, but sadly I see many women damning the consequences cos they are learning from the masters of the art.

With all due respect, it's not about who's more/less disciplined. It doesn't change the fact that gross indiscipline pervades our society today. Also, it's not right to assert that a 'few' men are disciplined. That can on on arrived @ following extensive interactions with lots of men coupled with experiences not just hearsay (which I doubt you have, I may be wrong). More or less, I still agree as men, we ought to do more than we do. But cheating is an evil that can only only overcome by both gender. Not just one. Let's just stop all these blame games.

jaszplus12:

I truly wish you won't get so angry. fact is, everyone is entitled to his or her opinion and anyone who cares can "take" the OPs advice. you just realize that when a marriage is great with faithful couples the ones with infidelity in mind become jealous! let them choose their path!!!
you hear?

You don't get it. It's because of write-ups like this that make men think they have the right to mess around. The society has more or less given them the free hand to cheat since the blame goes back to their wives. How many articles about how to be good husbands have you seen before? Are men so perfect themselves? Why can't they work on themselves to make their marriages work? I'm not raising my daughter to live her life massaging a man's bloated ego neither will I raise my son to believe that a woman's sole purpose on earth is to 'keep him'. Long and short of my epistle, just value your partner and treat them the way you want to be treated, that shouldn't be so hard.

ImaIma1:


In that case, both of them are wrong. What happened to communication? They became one for a reason. To make themselves better. If the man sees that she is getting overwhelmed with the kids, he should get a househelp or help in any way that he can to make it easier for her. They are also his kids and she is sacrificing for both of them. He should tell her she is losing herself and that she needs to pay attention to herself. It is not rocket science. Marriage takes work put in by both parties not just the wife getting worked up with her job, the house and children while the guy goes out to cheat.

I have encountered several instances where men tell their wives exactly what you just said...the result? Nothing changes. The weight gain keeps coming, the shabby looks remain, they 'lose' themselves in the name o child-rearing. Does it give us the liberty to cheat? No. Are we entitled to cheat? No. I'm just saying more often than not, we find it difficult to inculcate in our culture the necessity to appear appealing to our spouses. Communication does not help, most times. I'm being frank with you. I wish it does but more often than not, it doesn't.

ImaIma1:


I enjoyed your debate. Both of you should debate more.
Off course i agree more with frenzy. Some men try to generalize cheating because they can't keep their third legs in check. A woman can have 4kids and still have the figure of Kim Kardashian or Beyonce and the husband will still cheat. Cheating is no fault of the woman.

This is an assumption that will plague us for for long time, the assumption that cheating is strictly restricted to men. My dear, there's no smoke without fire. It takes two to tangle (except in cases of sexual assault). When we understand its not just a man's problem, then both parties can work towards avoiding it or attaining a workable solution if it does.

frenzyduchess:
thanks ,so I have seen with my eyes.This particular case is a woman I envy and always wish to be hot like her when I finish having children, the way she falls out and dresses, even younger guys drool, but her husband can hit on anything in skirt. Guys in the area that know always ask what the man is looking for outside. Good character, good bedmatics, good character have proven time and time again not to tame a man dog ,simple

Honestly, I've followed your line of thoughts. Quite impressive I must admit, but can you stop using that phrase 'man dog' please. I know you can rise above whatever goads you into using it but please stop, it doesn't add to your already impressive resume. I'm not a saint either, but I don't see any reason in referring to the female gender in any derogatory term for whatever purpose. We cannot even create cells, it doesn't speak well of us when we use insultive terms when referring to ourselves. I repeat, I respect your views as an observer and my opinions even though they don't matter hasn't changed a bit. Even thieves sentenced to capital punishment are entitled to a stick of cigar before death. One love sis.

Vikings55:
When his wife calls, he will turn to u and say quit or shhhhhuuuu my wife is calling, remember that is all u are shuuuu to him, u play dummy while they talk about the kids and important stuff, continue wasting your time

Gullible thing. Sorry o.

It's not like that. Many times the mistress does not know that there is a wife and many times if she knows, she thinks that the wife is a witch making the man's life a living hell or some story of that sort.

Women fighting their fellow women. Why not direct your anger at the wandering d.ick?

dominique:


You don't get it. It's because of write-ups like this that make men think they have the right to mess around. The society has more or less given them the free hand to cheat since the blame goes back to their wives. How many articles about how to be good husbands have you seen before? Are men so perfect themselves? Why can't they work on themselves to make their marriages work? I'm not raising my daughter to live her life massaging a man's bloated ego neither will I raise my son to believe that a woman's sole purpose on earth is to 'keep him'. Long and short of my epistle, just value your partner and treat them the way you want to be treated, that shouldn't be so hard.

I think we are still saying the same thing my sis...everyone has his marriage to build or destroy! if you follow some crazy ideology of plurality of women and fall into a ditch the proponent of that ideology can never save one! I love your idea...that's what I mean.
thx

riyanxeally:
only a useless he goat ll do that...do u know wat women go thru after child bearing to raise kids....a loving man shld always help put d kids to sleep n wen he cant keep loving n appreciating s jewel God has given him...loving men ll even create time fr vacations n all..plus u want her to look sexy wat stops u from changing her wardrobe huh??

Being attractive to a spouse does not begin and end with changing wardrobe. The wardrobe was changed before they met, it may or may not continue depending on circumstances. It's beyond just putting the kids to sleep. Men are wired by nature to 'believe' in what they see, just as women are wired to 'believe' in what they hear. Bottom line: never forget what attracted both of you to each other in the first instance. Marriage, childbearing and other things in the home should not drive a wedge between both spouses. For a fact, even after 30 years of marriage, a man is still concerned about how his wife looks, no doubt. Ask your boyfriend, he'll concur.

All I know is that most MEN are not worth staying faithful to. All these extramarital affairs ranting would stop when women realise this and also play along.

Take good care of yourself, look good and eat well, I can assure you, someone better will show interest in you, shikena!

emperormossad:

With all due respect, it's not about who's more/less disciplined. It doesn't change the fact that gross indiscipline pervades our society today. Also, it's not right to assert that a 'few' men are disciplined. That can on on arrived @ following extensive interactions with lots of men coupled with experiences not just hearsay (which I doubt you have, I may be wrong). More or less, I still agree as men, we ought to do more than we do. But cheating is an evil that can only only overcome by both gender. Not just one. Let's just stop all these blame games.

I am not casting blame at any gender, however, we must remove sentiments from it and be truthful to ourselves. It's easier to tame a woman than a man, that is why when the the white men came they attacked them men first and capturing the woman and children was like a walk in the park. It's easier for a responsible man to bring out the best in a GOOD woman, but a terrible husband will make her miserable, but unlike those days, the door is wide for her to exit. I for one am concerned about the growing rate of divorce in this generation.I am glad that you agree that men ought to do more, as the " head " they are. Sadly alot have misinterpreted being the head as being authoritative, domineering and bossy. They forget to guide, be a companion, support and protect. This is not about gender tussle but we must understand that each gender has its role to play,and when one fails to play it's role, then the other is left stranded to double up responsibility of both gender. Men are not taught to be good husbands, they are left to find them selves and hopefully find their way by trial and error. That's is my point

dominique:


You don't get it. It's because of write-ups like this that make men think they have the right to mess around. The society has more or less given them the free hand to cheat since the blame goes back to their wives. How many articles about how to be good husbands have you seen before? Are men so perfect themselves? Why can't they work on themselves to make their marriages work? I'm not raising my daughter to live her life massaging a man's bloated ego neither will I raise my son to believe that a woman's sole purpose on earth is to 'keep him'. Long and short of my epistle, just value your partner and treat them the way you want to be treated, that shouldn't be so hard.

Any society that gives anyone the leeway to cheat is a culturally backwards one. That cannot be referred to as a sane society.

This is insulting to women Especially the wives, why would someone write this about a woman who is giving up everything just to take care of her family? Some men need to use their brains. The fact is no matter what a woman does a cheat is will stil go out. Pls ladies be yourself, love you, dont let the society make you feel your not doing enough. .. we were wonderfully made and special to God, any man who doesnt appreciate his woman for stupid reasons, leave him to God, they end up miserable... I love my ladies, may God bless you wonderful women.

emperormossad:

Honestly, I've followed your line of thoughts. Quite impressive I must admit, but can you stop using that phrase 'man dog' please. I know you can rise above whatever goads you into using it but please stop, it doesn't add to your already impressive resume. I'm not a saint either, but I don't see any reason in referring to the female gender in any derogatory term for whatever purpose. We cannot even create cells, it doesn't speak well of us when we use insultive terms when referring to ourselves. I repeat, I respect your views as an observer and my opinions even though they don't matter hasn't changed a bit. Even thieves sentenced to capital punishment are entitled to a stick of cigar before death. One love sis.

noted ,it definitely won't be hard for me to do away with the phrase,that was just my own coined word to express my utter disgust for such people, but you are right. I will do as you have advised ,thanks

frenzyduchess:
I am not casting blame at any gender, however, we must remove sentiments from it and be truthful to ourselves. It's easier to tame a woman than a man, that is why when the the white men came they attacked them men first and capturing the woman and children was like a walk in the park. It's easier for a responsible man to bring out the best in a GOOD woman, but a terrible husband will make her miserable, but unlike those days, the door is wide for her to exit. I for one am concerned about the growing rate of divorce in this generation.I am glad that you agree that men ought to do more, as the " head " they are. Sadly alot have misinterpreted being the head as being authoritative, domineering and bossy. They forget to guide, be a companion, support and protect. This is not about gender tussle but we must understand that each gender has its role to play,and when one fails to play it's role, then the other is left stranded to double up responsibility of both gender. Men are not taught to be good husbands, they are left to find them selves and hopefully find their way by trial and error. That's is my point

First of all, I am not and will not be sentimental on a very sensitive issue as this. Secondly, let's not try to compare with happened during the slave trade Era viz-a-viz issues concerning relationships even though it still involves the male and female gender. They're two completely different situations with completely different ideologies serving completely different purposes. I also will not absolve men if any blame when they're responsible. I also believe that if cheating is to be reduced, I state again that it is not just a 'man problem'. Inasmuch as cheating is no acceptable, some of the aetiologies can be avoided, prevented by mutual efforts from both spouses. I don't think any woman will be comfortable in any relationship that makes her unhappy, the same goes for men. I beg to disagree that men aren't taught to be good husbands. My parents, in particular my father teaches me @ every opportunity he gets, not just by word of mouth but also through his actions towards my mother. And I can bet I'm not alone in this. Sometimes we fail to heed their advice but I know they try their best. It's not easy considering the present society we live in but as men, we ought to know and do better, this does not exclude the female folk also. Lastly, don't you think the principle of 'leaving the door ajar' in relationships contribute to the rising incidence of divorce? No one ones to fix broke things today, unlike the past. A lot of us want the easy way out...methinks it ain't fair. We ought to give a little more to try and make things work before we throw in the towel. My respect still goes out to you and others here. Learnt a lot going through these comments.

frenzyduchess:
noted ,it definitely won't be hard for me to do away with the phrase,that was just my own coined word to express my utter disgust for such people, but you are right. I will do as you have advised ,thanks

I respect your views nontheless. Will look forward to read your comments on other issues. I consider them instructive, no flattery.

GratefulHeart23:


The same reason I won't advise any married woman to be faithful to her cheating husband. He cheats, I cheat and the other men even spend much more on me than he does. I take good care of myself and have time for my child. Most times when he's caught in his Web of lies, I shake it off.

What he does doesn't bother me any more unlike before since I now have someone better than him. So why should a woman pray hard and die of high blood pressure over a cheating husband when there's always another man interested in her? Just that some women don't want to cheat but the truth is that most of those other men interested in her are more caring than her cheating husband.

Two wrongs don't make a right.

emperormossad:

I have encountered several instances where men tell their wives exactly what you just said...the result? Nothing changes. The weight gain keeps coming, the shabby looks remain, they 'lose' themselves in the name o child-rearing. Does it give us the liberty to cheat? No. Are we entitled to cheat? No. I'm just saying more often than not, we find it difficult to inculcate in our culture the necessity to appear appealing to our spouses. Communication does not help, most times. I'm being frank with you. I wish it does but more often than not, it doesn't.

You are right. Women need to take care of their looks whether in pregnancy or after bearing children. She shouldn't use it as an excuse to look shabby and unattractive. If the husband cannot reach her, it is better he tells a family member that she will listen to to talk some sense into her than for worse to happen.
These days there are so many platforms and forums that help in those areas.

emperormossad:

Two wrongs don't make a right.

Lol...let the man be the right one