i've been reading through alot of the threads on here and i notice that alot of guys are complaining about how girls offer nothing in relationships and all they care about is money and never give anything in  return and blah, blah blah. My question is what about the girls who give alot in their relationships but dont get much in return?

Is it wrong for them to spend alot on their boyfreind? i ask this question because over the course of my relationship with my bf, i have spent alot on him,  i bought him a ps3 and video games and ralph lauren perfume for his bday, helped him pay for his car, bought him a mac for our anniversary, a 52 inch flat screen tv and $600 gift card for christmas,  alot of my friends tell me that i shouldnt be doing that and the guy will take advantage of u if u do.

So my question is, is it wrong for a girl to spend alot of money on a guy she loves?

Now I ain't saying he a gold digga

but he ain't messin with no broke b1tc3s

On a side note, don't bend over backwards trying to satisfy him materially but if you're loaded, why the hell not? What may seem like a lot to others might just be pennies to you.

Pweety4me:

Hmm gurl and is he doing d same in return?

hey preety

[size=13pt]if he deserves it
if he's worth it
if he appreciates it
if he reciprocates

then you are good [/size]

If you've got  loads of bucks. . . . .  heck, go ahead and spoil him rotten, its amazin the tings we do for love.

@Pweety4me He has done stuff for me but not as much because he is a college student and he cant afford to buy me the things i buy for him. I am a college student myself but i can afford it

i am not just talking about material things. there are alot of females who cannot afford to buy their guys alot of things but they still do alot for em as in cooking, taking care of em etc,

Nothing, absolutely nothing if u've got the cash, n he appriciates it. The same way it isn't wrong spending on a girl.

sagluva:

i've been reading through alot of the threads on here and i notice that alot of guys are complaining about how girls offer nothing in relationships and all they care about is money and never give anything in return and blah, blah blah. My question is what about the girls who give alot in their relationships but dont get much in return?
Is it wrong for them to spend alot on their boyfreind? i ask this question because over the course of my relationship with my bf, i have spent alot on him, i bought him a ps3 and video games and ralph lauren perfume for his bday, helped him pay for his car, bought him a mac for our anniversary, a 52 inch flat screen tv and $600 gift card for christmas, alot of my friends tell me that i shouldnt be doing that and the guy will take advantage of u if u do. So my question is,
is it wrong for a girl to spend alot of money on a guy she loves?

Why cant he buy that for himself? Doesnt the guy have pride?
What did he get for you?
Lemme ask you this, this will make it all clear- If he leaves you or you catch him cheating, would you regret the amount you spent on him?
If you can give without wanting it back even if you dont stay together, then fine, if not, you need to do some serious rethinking.



Its not wrong to help once in a while, but to spoil him like this na, I just hope you are recieving your cup in full as well.

Bad_Mo_Fo:


hey preety

_{I heard yu. . .}

sagluva:

@Pweety4me He has done stuff for me but not as much because he is a college student and he cant afford to buy me the things i buy for him. I am a college student myself but i can afford it

_{Umm we'll do u think that he deserves it?}

Either way, i just think that from the onset, if you find yourself spending a lot
on who you've just started going out with, then they are there simply for what they can get.
A potential partner will not keep making you buy things for them all the time.
(this is the clearest sign that it wont last)

Such relationships are not meant to be as when the resources start to dry,
the parasite changes their behaviour.

sagluva:

i've been reading through alot of the threads on here and i notice that alot of guys are complaining about how girls offer nothing in relationships and all they care about is money and never give anything in return and blah, blah blah. My question is what about the girls who give alot in their relationships but dont get much in return?
Is it wrong for them to spend alot on their boyfreind? i ask this question because over the course of my relationship with my bf, i have spent alot on him,  i bought him a ps3 and video games and ralph lauren perfume for his bday, helped him pay for his car, bought him a mac for our anniversary, a 52 inch flat screen tv and $600 gift card for christmas,  alot of my friends tell me that i shouldnt be doing that and the guy will take advantage of u if u do. So my question is,
is it wrong for a girl to spend alot of money on a guy she loves?

I'm sorry but shouldn't it be the other way round?

mama-gee:

I'm sorry but shouldn't it be the other way round?

Question 1:
Is it intrinsic and compulsory to have it the other way around?

Question 2:
What harm would it cause to have it the way it currently is?

It's not "wrong" to spend on your lover, so long as you're spending on the right person. It is effortlessly done out of love. However, if you spend it on a digger who's only using you for his ends, you may regret that decision in the end.

H2O2:

Question 1:
Is it intrinsic and compulsory to have it the other way around?

Question 2:
What harm would it cause to have it the way it currently is?

And what has all these insensible questions got to do with my question which is "Why should a girl spend money on a man"?

In fact I had a boss who lavished her man with spoils, but those two are inseparable. They were married in heaven and have been fortunate enough to find each other here on earth. All that PS3 wey you dey talk, na puff puff to them.
Just be careful.

mama-gee:

And what has all these insensible questions got to do with my question which is "Why should a girl spend money on a man"?

Yes, if you feel your questions are insensible I won't dare to disagree. 

I believe your question is "shouldn't it be the other way around?"

And to paraphrase, my counter-question is "why should it be the other way around?"

i bought him a ps3 and video games and ralph lauren perfume for his bday, helped him pay for his car, bought him a mac for our anniversary, a 52 inch flat screen tv and $600 gift card for christmas,

paying for car, laptop, flat screen tv, almost $1k gift card, video games, perfumes all for one  boy?
my goodness   what lucky dude
he better be washing your dishes or something. lol   just kidding

but seriously, it's not wrong to spend a lot on a guy. as long as u have the money and are happy spending it i.e he is a perfect trustworthy boyfriend and deserves what your doing for him.


you are a very pretty girl from ur profile pic too just to comment!! just be careful though. make sure u know him inside out otherwise u might start having regrets when u break up. same goes with guys who have regrets when they break up with a girl they've spent a lot on.

H2O2:

Yes, if you feel your questions are insensible I won't dare to disagree. 

I believe your question is "shouldn't it be the other way around?"

And to paraphrase, my counter-question is "why should it be the other way around?"

Who is more superior between a man and a woman?
Who gets to call the shots when it comes to making decisions?
Who proposes first?
When you give me the answer to these questions, You'll see why every normal human being would ask the same question I asked.

Lamii:

paying for car, laptop, flat screen tv, almost $1k gift card, video games, perfumes all for one boy?
my goodness what lucky dude
he better be washing your dishes or something. lol just kidding

but seriously, it's not wrong to spend a lot on a guy. as long as u have the money and are happy spending it i.e he is a perfect trustworthy boyfriend and deserves what your doing for him.

funny enuff i dont think its wrong

soo far as ur not payin his school fees his bills his rent or anything else thats a neccesaty

u can buy him the odd polo shirt for xmas

or in my case- went brand huntin and saw this perfume

but never summin too expensive or too out of the blue otherwise theyll take advantage

neva promise guys anything

if u really wanna spend wait till theres a ring on ur finger

then lavish him!!

I have my reservation about a girl spending on me. If she wants to, fine.

I have a friend here in the UK, that his girlfriend bought all his electronic gadgets for him. Right down to his i-phone, which got nicked off him, and she replaced it with a BB storm the second day.

mama-gee:

Who is more superior between a man and a woman?
Who gets to call the shots when it comes to making decisions?
Who proposes first?
When you give me the answer to these questions, You'll see why every normal human being would ask the same question I asked.

I would be more than inclined to agree with you that a man is
-superior (you're basically saying you being a woman makes you inferior to me, a man)
-should call the shots and make all decisions
-should propose first

but that would be me feeding the system and perpetuating whatever gigantuan amount of prejudices or stereotypes we africans like to harbor.  with that limiting colonial mentality aside though

if i argue that daftly in the presence of intellectual mates here at my school while upholding those chauvinistic statements you posted above, I would most likely be destroyed to pieces and shamed.

Frankly, a man is not superior to a woman . . . we only deceive ourselves into believing that.
Women can be just as sound in decision making as men are.

Pataki:

I have my reservation about a girl spending on me. If she wants to, fine.

I have a friend here in the UK, that his girlfriend bought all his electronic gadgets for him. Right down to his i-phone, which got nicked off him, and she replaced it with a BB storm the second day.

some women are monkeys

in this case shes tryna buy his love

it wont work!!

cos he will dump her for the next chick who is dependant on him!!

ayettymama:



cos he will dump her for the next chick who is dependant on him!!

things are changing fast my dear.
today, more women are graduating from college and graduate school etc. so clearly more women are starting to make more money than men. it will be illogical for men not to agree to r/s where the female has more power.

H2O2:


Frankly, a man is not superior to a woman . . . we only deceive ourselves into believing that.
Women can be just as sound in decision making as men are.

i totally agree.

ayettymama

calm down. . . .

Just because a woman spends on a man does not mean thatz her means of keeping him or buying his loff.

I dont find it wrong, infact I encourage it. If you care about him, then spend on him as he spends on you.

Why should men be the only one spending?

My only problem is spending on a dude that doesnt deserve it. lol If you're spending on a dude that thinks you're an id//iot because you're helping him, and then tries to dry out your acct, then you better stop on your track and stop the spending.

Normality breeds lack of grattitude, which breeds remorse [for me]

I've spent on men alot, even my male friends [not because I think I can keep them], but because I want to, I dont mind But like everybody else, I have my limits

fl

the first time i heard this was from an elder

as a woman- you dont spend your money on a man

simply because u have it and he doesnt

buying ur friends presents are different

also if u have plenty money at ur disposal- buy them expensive gifts and see nothing wrong with it

they will all take advantage of you! thats the honest truth

most women spend thier money thinking the man will believe its cos they care

thats not true

the man believes its cos thier desperate

a self respecting man wouldnt want a womans money simply cos of the way it makes the woman look

no matter how rich she is!!

i mean if u spend alot of money on ur men and it works for u then so be it

but i wont advice it for most women and certainly wont encourage it

times are changing but not that fast!!

ayettymama:

some women are monkeys

in this case shes tryna buy his love

it wont work!!

cos he will dump her for the next chick who is dependant on him!!

She is not buying his love with money. She has the money, and she wants to spend it. What would you say of a woman who is into prostitution, earns her money and yet still spends the same money on another man she proclaims to love somewhere else? Is she buying the man's love with money?

I do not deny love cannot be bought with money esp. in our time. But it would be so wrong to conclude that whenever a lady spends lavishly on a guy, she is buying his love with money. Afterall, we guys also spend lavishly on you women! And furthermore this is a girl who enters a night club, and the least amount she has on her is at least 600quid, just simply as a  naija student here in the UK.

they will all take advantage of you! thats the honest truth.    
the man believes its cos thier desperate

and you think many women don't take advantage of a man's money?  
u think many women are not desperate?

as i said, if she knows the guy inside out and trusts him. there is nothing wrong with it.

times are changing but not that fast!!

depends on what country u live in. if naija, then yes
but this girl lives in US or UK. and time are changing very fast!!
many women r single because they can't find men who r richer/ well off than them. women r advancing more than men at a rapid rate. esp if ur a black person and don't want to find a non-black bf. then get ready for the guy to be poorer than u unless ur lucky. so in that case, u still expect the guy to be spending on the girl?  

Pataki:

She is not buying his love with money. She has the money, and she wants to spend it. What would you say of a woman who is into prostitution, earns her money and yet still spends the same money on another man she proclaims to love somewhere else? Is she buying the man's love with money?

I do not deny love cannot be bought with money esp. in our time. But it would be so wrong to conclude that whenever a lady spends lavishly on a guy, she is buying his love with money. Afterall, we guys also spend lavishly on you women! And furthermore this is a girl who enters a night club, and the least amount she has on her is at least 600quid, just simply as a  naija student here in the UK.

THEN WHAT IS SHE DOIN THEN

chaaaaale ooo  

she popped to england and started with the wrong crew!!

where did she meet ur friend?? south east??

see what my relatives are doin wit thier money!!!

if i find her i go beat her well well!!

ayettymama:

fl

the first time i heard this was from an elder

as a woman- you dont spend your money on a man

simply because u have it and he doesnt

buying your friends presents are different

also if u have plenty money at your disposal- buy them expensive gifts and see nothing wrong with it

they will all take advantage of you! thats the honest truth

most women spend thier money thinking the man will believe its cos they care

thats not true

the man believes its cos thier desperate

a self respecting man wouldnt want a womans money simply cos of the way it makes the woman look

no matter how rich she is!!

i mean if u spend alot of money on your men and it works for u then so be it

but i wont advice it for most women and certainly wont encourage it

times are changing but not that fast!!

Trust me, you make a lot of sense.  

Do you buy things for your female friends? Do you give them gifts?

If your best friend asks you for money are you going to give it to her?

Why should it be different when it comes to the male species?

I mentioned in my earlier posts that NOT ALL women seek to find "everlasting" love by spending on me.

If you have the money and you dont mind, why not?

But if the dude sees it as a normality and is not shameful of asking you for money, if he makes it a frequent request and expectation, that's where you draw the line.

I hate asking things from ppl, it ticks me off. If a guy asks me for sth once, twice, third time, I wont mind.

Fourth time, wtf, se ori e ko pe ni? If he EXPECTS me to "HELP" like a disable, then I get remorseful, I begin to feel disgusted and used.

There's a line for everything. . . . but the poster is going too far. A car, $600 gift card? Nitori kini?

Lamii:

and you think many women don't take advantage of a man's money?  
u think many women are not desperate?

there are also many women

they are disposable!

Lamii:


depends on what country u live in. if naija, then yes
but this girl lives in US or UK. and time are changing very fast!!
many women r single because they can't find men who r richer/ well off than them. women r advancing more than men at a rapid rate. esp if your a black person and don't want to find a non-black bf. then get ready for the guy to be poorer than u unless your lucky. so in that case, u still expect the guy to be spending on the girl?  

this is the reason women do the things in question

cos they think men are running out!!

neways each to his her own

i just said mine- if it dont work for u

empty ur savings account and give it to the next broke man u meet in KFC

lets see what he does with u after spending ur money!!