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How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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How Do I Break Up With Her? / Do I Break Up With Him? / How Do I Dump My Girlfriend Without Hurting Her? (2) (3) (4)

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Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 6:43pm On Oct 15, 2017
Bro, you have many wonderful counsels already BUT I think you should follow your heart.

I guess you're ripe for marriage and not playing around. Follow your heart bro.
This is not as easy as some people put it.

What I did in my situation: I simply prayed and asked God to easily let her go if she wasn't mine.
She left. Such issues are to crucial to handle on my own. I nor go lie: I DREAD marrying the wrong person.

#simpleprayer

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Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by yomi007k(m): 7:09pm On Oct 15, 2017
kimbraa:
Op, the truth is; you don't love her. What do you mean by she's the complete opposite of you? Were you supposed to date a lady that does things like you do?.

Tell her how you feel. Though, getting hurt is inevitable in this situation.

Ur right..if u do love someone u tolerate and u guys blend with each other.
Me n my girl have differnces too but we always find a way to blend in and still support each others cause.


No 2 persons can ever be the same...

Even my parents are complete opposites n I wonder how in Gods name dey did it.


That's where maturity comes into play.

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Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 7:25pm On Oct 15, 2017
yomi007k:


Ur right..if u do love someone u tolerate and u guys blend with each other.
Me n my girl have differnces too but we always find a way to blend in and still support each others cause.


No 2 persons can ever be the same...

Even my parents are complete opposites n I wonder how in Gods name dey did it.


That's where maturity comes into play.
Exactly the point I made. We're attracted to the complete opposite of us.
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 7:28pm On Oct 15, 2017
mrphysics:
Bro, I had a similar issue till a condition came out and I took advantage of it.

If I had just told her frankly, she would have hurt herself. An emotional being, but such people are stronger than you think..

If she have a reason to leave you, she won't think twice, that's who they are. So stop thinking and do it immediately.

But you must take advantage of something about the relationship which you have been thinking about, leverage on it. Break it and move on.


Interesting...But one thing the oP says i disagree with, Kimbraa also spoke about

Differences in interest doesn't mean it won't work oh..We just keep been spoon-fed rubbish doctrine...Opposites can marry and bring their different strengths to compliment one another..I've seen two people i told way back 2007, were incompatible, everyone said so, but guess what, it's ten years today, i saw this individual and i laughed...


Who says people with different interests can't go well? It's all about do both parties love one another enough to deal with the weaknesses/shortcomings off one another. If there's love, fixing issues is a small matter, when people choose to bail out, it's either there wasn't love, or it wasn't strong. In this case, i'll suggest the love wasn't strong enough, or he can't deal with her downsides...



Many times, we should marry/date our opposites and not the other way around so both parties bring their individualities together infuse it into oneness and make it work...Too many people are looking for people with similar interests, but na lie, marry/date your opposite...
We should date/marry our opposites if we can tolerate their weaknesses and if they choose and are willing to become one with us...
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 7:33pm On Oct 15, 2017
Please you better open up to her.make her to understand that she is a good lady but there is more to that .tell her that you are not really ready for a serious relationship that if she sees someone she like that she is free to accept the proposal.that way I believe she will know that you are no longer interested in the relationship.
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 7:40pm On Oct 15, 2017
supersystemsnig:


Interesting...But one thing the oP says i disagree with, Kimb.raa also spoke about

Differences in interest doesn't mean it won't work oh..We just keep been spoon-fed rubbish doctrine...Opposites can marry and bring their different strengths to compliment one another..I've seen two people i told way back 2007, were incompatible, everyone said so, but guess what, it's ten years today, i saw this individual and i laughed...


Who says people with different interests can't go well? It's all about do both parties love one another enough to deal with the weaknesses/shortcomings off one another. If there's love, fixing issues is a small matter, when people choose to bail out, it's either there wasn't love, or it wasn't strong. In this case, i'll suggest the love wasn't strong enough, or he can't deal with her downsides...



Many times, we should marry/date our opposites and not the other way around so both parties bring their individualities together infuse it into oneness and make it work...Too many people are looking for people with similar interests, but na lie, marry/date your opposite...
We should date/marry our opposites if we can tolerate their weaknesses and if they choose and are willing to become one with us...
It's more like you're advocating for people to marry/date their opposite. You don't have to 'cause the laws of attractions by nature attracts you to your complete opposite. That's what compliments us. Some people would say "I can marry myself", but the truth of the matter is; they can't. Variety spices life.
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 7:45pm On Oct 15, 2017
kimbraa:
It's more like you're advocating for people to marry/date their opposite. You don't have to 'cause the laws of attractions by nature attracts you to your complete opposite. That's what compliments us. Some people would say "I can marry myself", but the truth of the matter is; they can't. Variety spices life.


On the contrary, i have a terrible rule when it comes to date/marry, i shared this idea with a friend, he's the second person i see that shares this ideology. And it's, you can marry any body...It sounds like a mouthful, but we can marry anyone, all this mumbo jumbo that are being mumbled up is just tedious...What matters is tolerance and workability of both parties, do we agree to be together? If we do, can we work it out...So, yes opposites works, but similar interests works perfect too...I've met a 98% compatibility person, guess why we dodn't work, one person wanted to marry from her state...and ignored the 98%percentile..So different strokes for diff folks, in the end, if people want to be together, they will make it work, afterall na them choose theirself.

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Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 7:58pm On Oct 15, 2017
supersystemsnig:



On the contrary, i have a terrible rule when it comes to date/marry, i shared this idea with a friend, he's the second person i see that shares this ideology. And it's, you can marry any body...It sounds like a mouthful, but we can marry anyone, all this mumbo jumbo that are being mumbled up is just tedious...What matters is tolerance and workability of both parties, do we agree to be together? If we do, can we work it out...So, yes opposites works, but similar interests works perfect too...I've met a 98% compatibility person, guess why we dodn't work, one person wanted to marry from her state...and ignored the 98%percentile..So different strokes for diff folks, in the end, if people want to be together, they will make it work, afterall na them choose theirself.
The 100% or 99.9% compatibility isn't necessarily in terms of shared interest. Your interests could be different but all that matters is support. You have a point.

I haven't seen a couple that eats same meals, sleep alike, love same movies, read same books, love same brand of clothes, hold same views on all interest. Meaning, they like and dislike same things. It's like being in your shell, and I don't think anyone would love that. grin This is what I've been saying.
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 8:04pm On Oct 15, 2017
kimbraa:
The 100% or 99.9% compatibility isn't necessarily in terms of shared interest. Your interests could be different but all that matters is support. You have a point.

I haven't seen a couple that eats same meals, sleep alike, love same movies, read same books, love same brand of clothes, hold same views on all interest. Meaning, they like and dislike same things. It's like being in your shell, and I don't think anyone would love that. grin This is what I've been saying.


Yeah, support meaning choice and tolerance, both indviduals should make a deliberate choice and should be tolerant of one another, if this is there, then 50% success rate is guaranteed, to me personally....


We're both saying the same time my sister...What caused all these mental wandering is knowledge...too much knowledge, our parents yeah many of their generations did not have the best of marriages but i'm sure didnt subject themselves to the wandering pattern evident in this generation..Folks seek 101 reasons to bail out then look for two reasons to nurture the best from a relationship...I mean it, i've seen marriage with just 30% compatibility clocked ten years, so the opposite principle is valid...For example, if i hate movies, and my wife does, i'm tolerant of this characteristic, out of desire to make her feel loved, i can learn a new habit and make up for the downside, It is unsafe to have a stiff, i.e. " ME " mentality in a relationship because both individuals should bend to accommodate the interest of the other at some point, and when both do it in turns, they will find a common ground and working formular to make things work...
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 8:10pm On Oct 15, 2017
supersystemsnig:



We're both saying the same time my sister...What caused all these mental wandering is knowledge...too much knowledge, our parents yeah many of their generations did not have the best of marriages but i'm sure didnt subject themselves to the wandering pattern evident in this generation..Folks seek 101 reasons to bail out then look for two reasons to nurture the best from a relationship...I mean it, i've seen marriage with just 30% compatibility clocked ten years, so the opposite principle is valid...For example, if i hate movies, and my wife does, i'm tolerant of this characteristic, out of desire to make her feel loved, i can learn a new habit and make up for the downside, It is unsafe to have a stiff, i.e. " ME " mentality in a relationship because both individuals should bend to accommodate the interest of the other at some point, and when both do it in turns, they will find a common ground and working formular to make things work...


Actually, our parents did abide by same rules. Like I said, it's nature. For the fact that they are coming together from different backgrounds and upbringing then their interest are divergent.
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 8:12pm On Oct 15, 2017
kimbraa:
Actually, our parents did abide by same rules. Like I said, it's nature. For the fact that they are coming together from different backgrounds and upbringing then their interest are divergent.


We're saying the same thing....Checklist

1. Choice - Do we both choose one another

2. Agreement to make it work

3. Principles -Things to fix to make it work

4. Tolerance - Cope with my downaides

5. Continuity - Repeat the working formular once we've found it


It's not complex...Too much learning is the problem
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Jman06(m): 8:31pm On Oct 15, 2017
Op, if you can't put up with her dominant nature then you better break up now. Many marriages today hit the rocks because people marry those with incompatible characteristics thinking that they would change.

If you go ahead to marry her then be ready to be the submissive partner in the marriage.

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Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by mrphysics(m): 8:42pm On Oct 15, 2017
supersystemsnig:


Interesting...But one thing the oP says i disagree with, Kimbraa also spoke about

Differences in interest doesn't mean it won't work oh..We just keep been spoon-fed rubbish doctrine...Opposites can marry and bring their different strengths to compliment one another..I've seen two people i told way back 2007, were incompatible, everyone said so, but guess what, it's ten years today, i saw this individual and i laughed...


Who says people with different interests can't go well? It's all about do both parties love one another enough to deal with the weaknesses/shortcomings off one another. If there's love, fixing issues is a small matter, when people choose to bail out, it's either there wasn't love, or it wasn't strong. In this case, i'll suggest the love wasn't strong enough, or he can't deal with her downsides...



Many times, we should marry/date our opposites and not the other way around so both parties bring their individualities together infuse it into oneness and make it work...Too many people are looking for people with similar interests, but na lie, marry/date your opposite...
We should date/marry our opposites if we can tolerate their weaknesses and if they choose and are willing to become one with us...
Opposite in interest can be a positive combination. People only fail to bring out the best in their negativity.

xPx =h
These are incompatibles but have been the basis of uncertainty principle.

People are wrongly fed, and that is the basis of our problem
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by mrphysics(m): 8:44pm On Oct 15, 2017
kimbraa:
Actually, our parents did abide by same rules. Like I said, it's nature. For the fact that they are coming together from different backgrounds and upbringing then their interest are divergent.
Incompatibles does not mean they can't stay together. If they rightly use it, it can be a turn around for them. Only if we are talking about interest.


Character incompatibility is a no for marriage
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 8:46pm On Oct 15, 2017
mrphysics:

Opposite in interest can be a positive combination. People only fail to bring out the best in their negativity.

xPx =h
These are incompatibles but have been the basis of uncertainty principle.

People are wrongly fed, and that is the basis of our problem




Oh my brov, i'm shocked we agree on this...


People are indeed wrongly fed....Like people believe every competitor should be an hater...

I had a friend, he was number one, i was number two, and we were the best of buddies...

He threatened me in Physics, I destroy him in Chemistry....Our differences brought out the best in us...Our friendship is now over 15 years with no strife between us...


People are just wrongly fed...If one marries his/her perfect replica, where will the zing emanate from?..
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by mrphysics(m): 8:50pm On Oct 15, 2017
supersystemsnig:





Oh my brov, i'm shocked we agree on this...


People are indeed wrongly fed....Like people believe every competitor should be an hater...

I had a friend, he was number one, i was number two, and we were the best of buddies...

He threatened me in Physics, I destroy him in Chemistry....Our differences brought out the best in us...Our friendship is now over 15 years with no strife between us...


People are just wrongly fed...If one marries his/her perfect replica, where will the zing emanate from?..
You are very correct bro.
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 8:55pm On Oct 15, 2017
mrphysics:

Incompatibles does not mean they can't stay together. If they rightly use it, it can be a turn around for them. Only if we are talking about interest.


Character incompatibility is a no for marriage


I agree with Character incompatibility , though i believe there's no such thing...WHY If we have love in our hearts, we can always learn new things, unlearn old habits, tolerate our partners, put our best to make things work...If things are left lop-sided, it's because the love isn't strong or isn't real..........
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 8:56pm On Oct 15, 2017
mrphysics:

You are very correct bro.




Did solomon not say too much knowledge causes grief...That's the problem of this society, people think they know what they want, but they don't know jack..They can't even see across the street...Tired of the stuvidity of dis generation..


E do me..

1 Like

Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by nairaman66(m): 9:18pm On Oct 15, 2017
cruchenutii:
So this is a real life issue & not some cooked up stories. I've been dating this Girl for 1 Year Plus , she's a sweet girl But Issue is.

We don't have a lot in common. She doesn't like what I like & I don't like what she likes. She's like the total opposite. I just tried to manage this far, but In order not to waste her time, I need to set her free on time. So she can find her other half & settle down on time. As I actually love her & wish her well in a reality.

I need to set her free, But I don't know how to, because she's the very Emotional type that can/may do something drastic because of Heart break.

SO i Just need ideas on how to set her free without being heart broken , And Explain to her nicely why we can't be together & Leave her in peace.

Biko help your guy Abeg. CC Emusmithy mrphysics kimbra tosyne2much ilegendd and pocohantas

Took you more than one year to know that you are the direct opposite of her!! Clap for your super story!! I know why you are leaving.. but karma is recording this story as we speak
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 9:21pm On Oct 15, 2017
nairaman66:


Took you more than one year to know that you are the direct opposite of her!! Clap for your super story!! I know why you are leaving.. but karma is recording this story as we speak


Lolz...How graphic...Funny illustration/pic on your siggy...I agree 100%
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by QueenSekxy(f): 9:26pm On Oct 15, 2017
ShawttySoFyne:
Sit her down, tell her kindly and respectfully that she's wonderful but the relationship isn't working for you. Talk it through for as long as she wants.
Hold her if she cries.
Answer all her questions honestly.
Promise to be there if she needs you, keep that promise and never date her friends.
Be a man, for God's sake.
that's the only way
can't agree more

1 Like

Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by mrcrabs(m): 9:38pm On Oct 15, 2017
On a real now. Do girls still get heart broken when men break up with them. Just asking though
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by generationz(f): 9:44pm On Oct 15, 2017
cruchenutii:
So this is a real life issue & not some cooked up stories. I've been dating this Girl for 1 Year Plus , she's a sweet girl But Issue is.

We don't have a lot in common. She doesn't like what I like & I don't like what she likes. She's like the total opposite. I just tried to manage this far, but In order not to waste her time, I need to set her free on time. So she can find her other half & settle down on time. As I actually love her & wish her well in a reality.

I need to set her free, But I don't know how to, because she's the very Emotional type that can/may do something drastic because of Heart break.

SO i Just need ideas on how to set her free without being heart broken , And Explain to her nicely why we can't be together & Leave her in peace.

Biko help your guy Abeg. CC Emusmithy mrphysics kimbra tosyne2much ilegendd and pocohantas
So what attracted you to her in the first place?
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by spy24(m): 9:51pm On Oct 15, 2017
By not breaking her heart
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 9:53pm On Oct 15, 2017
spy24:
By not breaking her heart


cheesy
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 11:10pm On Oct 15, 2017
generationz:

So what attracted you to her in the first place?

She's really beautiful & also very engaging. Those are her good sides. But very controlling & emotional. She always wants to have her way on the slightest thing.
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by StrawberryGloss(f): 9:10am On Oct 16, 2017
mrphysics:
Bro, I had a similar issue till a condition came out and I took advantage of it.

If I had just told her frankly, she would have hurt herself. An emotional being, but such people are stronger than you think..

If she have a reason to leave you, she won't think twice, that's who they are. So stop thinking and do it immediately.

But you must take advantage of something about the relationship which you have been thinking about, leverage on it. Break it and move on.

Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by mrphysics(m): 10:14am On Oct 16, 2017
[quote author=StrawberryGloss post=61466208][/quote]
Why the mention ma'am
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by smilingface(m): 10:28am On Oct 16, 2017
give her 30billion naira and tell her its over,trust me she will not even care whether you're going to exist tomorrow.
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by generationz(f): 7:15pm On Oct 16, 2017
cruchenutii:


She's really beautiful & also very engaging. Those are her good sides. But very controlling & emotional. She always wants to have her way on the slightest thing.
Have you tried to talk to her about it..

Is she the only child or the last born of her family?
Re: How Can I Break Up With My Girlfriend Without Leaving Her Heart Broken. by Nobody: 8:02pm On Oct 16, 2017
Sit her down, tell her that you guys are not compatible, tell her how special and unique she is and she will find a guy that is compatible with her and then say you don't want to continue the relationship anymore, I assure you, she will understand and go her way. She will be hurt but as time goes on, she will get over it.

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