I got maried abt 6 months ago at Ikeja Local government. We did not do a wine carrying or church wedding. However, his family do not want the union as they were not aware and so have refused to give their blessing. True, we are both adults but i believe a family blessing is very important and haven kept me a secret from his family worries me so i need to know what process and steps to take to get out of this marriage.

No, we dont have any kids. We have not even lived together as a couple as he has not been in the contry since. I just found out that there's another woman and he has bluntly told me he would rather be with the other woman. I dont want him being with me out of pity cos he believes i have a weal composition in health.

I don't know how divorces work in Lagos, but i was told you have to be married for at least a year! i think you should go to a lawyer . . .

Vie:

However, his family do not want the union as they were not aware and so have refused to give their blessing. True, we are both adults but i believe a family blessing is very important and haven kept me a secret from his family worries me

You mean you actually went ahead with a wedding without having met any of his family and now you want their blessings. Do you still have parents? were they part of the wedding or unavoidably absent as well? What sort of person are you? it's so convenient for you to rush into marriage without thinking and want out again so soon.

@ Coolier.

Nice, I didnt expect anything less. Anymore name calling wil be well derserved too.

@ Coolier.

Nice, I didnt expect anything less. Anymore name calling wil be well derserved too.

Vie:

@ Coolier.
Nice, I didnt expect anything less. Anymore name calling wil be well derserved too.

coolier asked some important questions that you didnt answer:

- if you believe that a family blessing is important, then why did you go ahead at the first place without their blessing?!
-where was YOUR family during this marriage?
- who was present then if his family wasnt there?!
- why did you get married at the first place?

since he doesnt have any need for you any longer, i suggest you go see a lawyer and start divorce proceedings on whatever you THOUGHT you had.

^^^^^its society that produces these "people".
a society that has people believe that you are nothing until you are married.
a society that has people believe that only through marriage can you find happiness or go anywhere.
a society that has people believe that only married can you succeed in life.
a society that has people believe that being a single mother is the end of the world and therefore being pregnant means that YOU HAVE TO GET MARRIED. . . . . . . . with just about "anybody"!

a NL female poster once wrote that:"married women are put on a higher scale in society, that a single woman/mother will get "absolutely nowhere" without a ring on her finger.
she wont get into certain members clubs- she wont get certain jobs- she cant get into certain positions- her children wont get certain opportunities or into certain schools"

when people start to think like that then i completely understand why there are people who find themselves in the poster's predicament.

Y do people judge so easily? The lady asked for some advice, not condemnation or lectures!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If you dont have any advice for her (or questions that U can ask in a civilized manner, why dont you just move on to the next thread.
Jeez!

spicymum:

Y do people judge so easily? The lady asked for some advice, not condemnation or lectures!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If you dont have any advice for her (or questions that U can ask in a civilized manner, why dont you just move on to the next thread.
Jeez!

my dear, no one is condemning her but we just talking for others to learn. for the poster, what kind of advice do u want to give to her? do u want to be part of her divorce? I dont think anyone wants to be. there is no advice for such, i can join u to enter fire that is my policy. she saw the fire before she chose to enter.

there is a saying that "a wise man learns from his own mistakes but a wiser man learns from others mistakes" so let others beware.