Serial daters (AKA confirmed bachelors) can be fun, charming, witty, and sexy. These men usually have dynamic careers and an extensive social circle, and there are thousands upon thousands of them across the country. They are well educated and can show beautiful and intelligent women a great time on a date. But are they marriage material? Doubtful.

These men are fun to go out with, but are never going to get married (despite what they may argue). They say they are constantly dating a new woman because they say haven’t found the right one yet that “shares their values.” I’m sorry, but if you’re constantly dating in a city that is overflowing with awesome women and haven’t found one who “shares your values”, then we have a problem.

Here are seven signs from Alex Wise a featured publisher of http://loveawake.com dating site that you have a serial dater on your hands:

1. He’s over 45, professional, and never been married.
2. He claims he wants to settle down, but hasn’t been in a committed relationship for over 2 years.
3. After the first few dates, which were fantastic, he simply stops calling rather than formally breaking up.
4. He has no problem getting intimate under the sheets, but cannot achieve any psychological intimacy.
5. He is married to his job.
6. He’s up on trendy bars and restaurants, which means he may be looking for some arm candy to bring to a place that’s meant to see and be seen.
7. He’s content to spend weekends by himself or with his male buddies, instead of you.

So, why are these men so dedicated to the bachelor life? Because it’s all that they know! They’ve become accustomed to living alone the way that they want to live. Serial daters are perfectly content to date (and sleep with) a ton of women. Going out with them is a great way to hone your dating skills, but just don’t fall for one because you’re only setting yourself up for heartache.

why d bachelors bellow me chose to attack women on this thread though!


OP are you or alex wise female

sadly, since women are looking at marriage like a do or die mission, no wonder there are deluded people who will look down on a man who dont want to get married. they have to make it look like there is something wrong with such man, while instead there is something seriously wrong when someone want to get married AT ANY COST, even if they are the most miserable person on earth. i'd rather be a serial dater BY CHOICE, than single because nobody want to settle with your sorry self (here lies the real issue).
marriage ko, baggage ni!

**** spit on floor and leave this thread****

Marriage isn't the ultimate in life, at least, that's what our sisters have been harping on for years. Now, we guys are starting to heed their admonitions they are complaining, yet again, that men are not marrying them. Women want to have it all, but it is humanly impossible to have it all for the generality of the human populace. Maybe 1% will be lucky to be so blessed, note I didn't use the word 'achieve'. No human can achieve having it all.

Anyway, with the well-advanced sexual revolution and woman's sexual liberation coupled with women not wanting to settle down until their eggs are beginning to lose value, men are slowly realising that sampling a vast array of booty is more thrilling than committing to the insatiable, ever-complaining harridan the modern woman is becoming/has become.

Having seen the world for what it is, I blame no man for hopping from woman to woman. Interestingly, most women complaining of men refusing to settle are usually in their 30s/40s, suddenly fertility clock is ticking and suitors are seemingly not as plentiful as they once were. This sudden reality check sends their heads spinning and all of a sudden, marriage looks appealing to them. I could go on for ever buy I'll stop here.

Women, marriage is not the ultimate. We, men agree with you. Goodbye.

Marriage is a big scam!

Newboss:
Marriage is a big scam!

I agree. Marriage is a tool of the patriarchy to subjugate unsuspecting women. That is what our sisters have been telling us. Now we accept and believe

Belafonte:


I agree. Marriage is a tool of the patriarchy to subjugate unsuspecting women. That is what our sisters have been telling us. Now we accept and believe

I tell you bro, that is how they keep misbehaving anyhow without sense. One came to my place for the weekend and I left the home in the morning for office, could you believe that she had to come to my office before leaving and brought a piece of female nail she found in my room while she was arranging the bed spread & started accusing me of being a cheat! Another one began to compete with me and was trying to hold back on sex thinking I'm a fuckboy that will grovel for sex. Sex that is as cheap as condom in this recession!? I will definitely marry once I see a lady good enough to walk down the aisle but until then census continues!

BiafraIShere:
I tell you bro, that is how they keep misbehaving anyhow without sense. One came to my place for the weekend and I left the home in the morning for office, could you believe that she had to come to my office before leaving and brought a piece of female nail she found in my room while she was arranging the bed spread & started accusing me of being a cheat! Another one began to compete with me and was trying to hold back on sex thinking I'm a fuckboy that will grovel for sex. Sex that is as cheap as condom in this recession!? I will definitely marry once I see a lady good enough to walk down the aisle but until then census continues!

Lol. These things work for weaker men, and there are more weaker men than not, that's why they've become bold to try it with every man they encounter. Most guys today are enablers who put these women on a pedestal hence, our current problems with the opppsite sex.


As the days go by, marriage looks less and less attractive to me. The only reason I will be marrying is to have a proper, stable home for my children because I love children and want to have a house full of them. Should that desire change, it's going to be bachelor tinz to the grave, living my life like a rock star.

Belafonte:



Lol. These things work for weaker men, and there are more weaker men than not, that's why they've become bold to try it with every man they encounter. Most guys today are enablers who put these women on a pedestal hence, our current problems with the opppsite sex.


As the days go by, marriage looks less and less attractive to me. The only reason I will be marrying is to have a proper, stable home for my children because I love children and want to have a house full of them. Should that desire change, it's going to be bachelor tinz to the grave, living my life like a rock star.

If not for children, I don't even think I will touch marriage with a long pole. I'm just focused on making money and the funny thing is that the more successful you become, the more they continue to dance around you while hoping to hook you, even the ones that ignored you before when you came sincerely to chyke them. I'm in my early thirties but I've stopped listening to those that keep putting pressure on me for marriage. Money rules the world but in Nigeria, money is everything and once you get it every other thing is added unto you on a platter and that includes women.

BiafraIShere:
If not for children, I don't even think I will touch marriage with a long pole. I'm just focused on making money and the funny thing is that the more successful you become, the more they continue to dance around you while hoping to hook you, even the ones that ignored you before when you came sincerely to chyke them. I'm in my early thirties but I've stopped listening to those that keep putting pressure on me for marriage. Money rules the world but in Nigeria, money is everything and once you get it every other thing is added unto you on a platter and that includes women.

That's just the way it is bro. What women have failed to realise is that the marital institution was designed to optimise the strength of both genders and produce the best environment for child rearing.

At this point, with my experience in relationships, I know I cannot marry a woman older than 26 and that's really pushing it for me. I have learned painfully that love is a scam like you said and ever since I've approached relationships with logic and a view to extracting as much benefit as I can I have found happiness I never imagined.

Like you, my priority is money making and living the life, marriage comes a distant last; and it's even on the list because of its importance

Belafonte:



That's just the way it is bro. What women have failed to realise is that the marital institution was designed to optimise the strength of both genders and produce the best environment for child rearing.

At this point, with my experience in relationships, I know I cannot marry a woman older than 26 and that's really pushing it for me. I have learned painfully that love is a scam like you said and ever since I've approached relationships with logic and a view to extracting as much benefit as I can I have found happiness I never imagined.

Like you, my priority is money making and living the life, marriage comes a distant last; and it's even on the list because of its importance

That's the absolute fact, there is nothing like love in Nigeria, and the reason could be because the country is largely impoverished with very ambitious people. I laugh at youths that fool themselves by believing there is love, in the West I agree, but in Nigeria it does not except maybe a fraction of say 2% Max. To those girls that are saying they will never leave there boyfriend, my brother, just flash the headlight of your Range-Rover sport or G-wagon in their direction and tell them you want to marry them, and see how they will dump that same boyfriend of theirs who is still struggling like a piece of rubbish! You will start hearing things like "I want to help my family" and the rest. The same applies to men, the average looking Jane they are saying they would die for is because they have not hit it big, let them hit it big and tell me if they will be able to resist those figure 8 and pretty ladies that will come for them. Then where is the love? Any man investing in a woman he is not married to is making the biggest mistake of his life because they will only package them and increase their value only for them to get attracted to someone higher on the food chain. I guess we all learn from the school of hard knocks and experience remains the best teacher.

Serial Daters .. Gizzzzz!!! What a catch phrase

BiafraIShere:
If not for children, I don't even think I will touch marriage with a long pole. I'm just focused on making money and the funny thing is that the more successful you become, the more they continue to dance around you while hoping to hook you, even the ones that ignored you before when you came sincerely to chyke them. I'm in my early thirties but I've stopped listening to those that keep putting pressure on me for marriage. Money rules the world but in Nigeria, money is everything and once you get it every other thing is added unto you on a platter and that includes women.

Well, for me, I’m in my early thirties as well. Got married at 29. My income grew 400% in 4 years
I can’t be thankful enough. What I notice is that successful men marry and they marry once. Facebook and Microsoft owners are typical example. My own take is.. change you circle and change your expectation on marriage. Go into it to make sacrifice and your life will be better for it.

For the money you intend to make. How much is good money to you? To be factual, it’s a subjective thing. I know guys that earn 5 million per month and are not fulfilled. So be careful on chasing money. Chase success which is a journey and part of the journey is having a trusted partner you can spend your old age with in Peace.✌️. My peice of advise

patani:



Well, for me, I’m in my early thirties as well. Got married at 29. My income grew 400% in 4 years
I can’t be thankful enough. What I notice is that successful men marry and they marry once. Facebook and Microsoft owners are typical example. My own take is.. change you circle and change your expectation on marriage. Go into it to make sacrifice and your life will be better for it.

For the money you intend to make. How much is good money to you? To be factual, it’s a subjective thing. I know guys that earn 5 million per month and are not fulfilled. So be careful on chasing money. Chase success which is a journey and part of the journey is having a trusted partner you can spend your old age with in Peace.✌️. My peice of advise

My brother did you read my post at all? 1. I never said I won't marry, and mind you that marriage is not all there to life. That you married and found happiness does not mean that another person who is single is not happy as a bachelor. 2. Yes, you married at 29, some married at 25, others may marry at 35 or never, it makes no difference it's the end that justifies the means. 3. Your assertion that successful people don't get divorced is a fallacy, it's not backed with any empirical evidence. You don't know the divorce statistics in the US & it's actually higher with the more affluent there. 4. Yes, success or being rich is subjective but people have different yardsticks for measuring success based on their initial position. Personally, I don't even desire to accumulate ostentatious wealth, once I'm able to have enough to live in a decent home, being able to travel to any destination I want for holiday & helping those around me then I'm okay, and I'm even close to it. 5. Success & having money are not mutually exclusive, you can't be successful in whatever you are doing if you are not earning reasonably from it, except it's for humanity. 6. Thank God for your life but that your income increased 400% is not necessarily because you got married, it may have been higher or lower if you are still single, mine also increased multiple folds even in the recession. Don't mind my long epistle, I actually have free time on my hands now.

Isnt it ironic that a marriage-loving country like Nigeria have youths who have been single, divorced and will never marry at a historic high. So, what's the fuss about?
We often hear that marriage is “dead,” or at any rate on its last legs and as dim as it sounds, plenty of marriages in this country end up in a divorce anyway. Again, what's the fuss about?
Why do we "like" marriage so much? Is it because Nigeria is a "religious society"?

BiafraIShere:
My brother did you read my post at all? 1. I never said I won't marry, and mind you that marriage is not all there to life. That you married and found happiness does not mean that another person who is single is not happy as a bachelor. 2. Yes, you married at 29, some married at 25, others may marry at 35 or never, it makes no difference it's the end that justifies the means. 3. Your assertion that successful people don't get divorced is a fallacy, it's not backed with any empirical evidence. You don't know the divorce statistics in the US & it's actually higher with the more affluent there. 4. Yes, success or being rich is subjective but people have different yardsticks for measuring success based on their initial position. Personally, I don't even desire to accumulate ostentatious wealth, once I'm able to have enough to live in a decent home, being able to travel to any destination I want for holiday & helping those around me then I'm okay, and I'm even close to it. 5. Success & having money are not mutually exclusive, you can't be successful in whatever you are doing if you are not earning reasonably from it, except it's for humanity. 6. Thank God for your life but that your income increased 400% is not necessarily because you got married, it may have been higher or lower if you are still single, mine also increased multiple folds even in the recession. Don't mind my long epistle, I actually have free time on my hands now.

Nice one Bro! Thanks for bringing your argument forward objectively and without insults. It shows there are still mature minds on nairaland.