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My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! - Crime (1) - Nairaland

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Timon Chukwuemeka Recounts Ordeal With SARS / Armed Robbers Nabbed After Shootout With SARS Operatives In Bayelsa. Photos / For Being In Possession Of 3 Phones, SARS Operatives Assault U.S Returnee (1) (2) (3) (4)

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Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by davillian(m): 4:23pm On Dec 05
grin
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by smithsydny(m): 4:23pm On Dec 05
My guy op.. U self feel am grin
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by Proudlyngwa(m): 4:23pm On Dec 05
Anybody that has not yet tweeted #ENDSARS is not a good citizen of this country

5 Likes

Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by foster881(m): 4:42pm On Dec 05
Who get IG NUMBER
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by Hunry: 4:42pm On Dec 05
No wonder Seriki use them sing, they must have dealt with him badly. "Federal SARS, Federal SARS... Ndlea, Ndlea... won fe ma implicate eh....... etc

2 Likes

Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by Worksunlimited: 4:48pm On Dec 05
Therock5555:
As a good law abiding and military fearing somebody, I've always minded my business when it comes to the Nigerian Forces, be it Lawma to Vigilante, I've always been on alert and avoid scenarios that could cause some trigger happy somebody to mistakenly send me to the underworld, but the SARS operatives we have around has made it an agenda to find people inside their toilets if need be.

So last week a colleague of mine had his girlfriend visiting which was kind of against office rules but my boss wasn't around, a thing led to another and they had a little argument, she left and came back five minutes later trying to create a scene, my colleague dragged her outside and came back like ten minutes later fuming, I asked him what the matter was but he just mumbled some stuffs and went to his table.

Thirty minutes later he got a call that his girlfriend had just borrowed money to go and call SARS for him, he told the person to allow his girlfriend to go call them, thinking the caller was trying to pull his legs.

We confronted him when he told us, he explained that he slapped his girlfriend because she was trying to make a scene outside, but he was sure she wasn't gonna call anybody, maybe she wanted him to go and beg her.

We kept teasing him and telling him to run home before the SARS truly came but he was laughing about it all through, that SARS wouldn't pay any attention to her request.

Boy was he wrong, an hour later we heard tires screeching outside the gate, I turned to see that my colleague had turned to flash cus he was nowhere in sight.

The rest of my colleagues dashed out leaving me behind as I had a phone call, next thing I heard bass voices vibrating outside.

I went outside still making call only to see four hefty men with black shirts, guns drawn and cutlass hanging around their necks, geeez in my mind I was like, "na isakaba this girl carry come"

My colleagues were all seated on the floor like criminals, they were asking the girl which of the boys was her boyfriend, kai as they saw me, they rushed me like swarms of flies.

"Na him abi, foolish boy, oya lie down"

I was already seeing myself in heaven chilling with bros J when the girl screamed that I wasn't the one, then a slap had already been pronounced on my face, they grabbed me up and asked of my colleague, I kept quiet but as one of them cocked his gun, i meekly pointed inside, they grabbed my shirt like I was an accomplice to the crime and began searching room by room, in my mind I was saying "if my guy disappear, I don die", my heart beat kept beating faster as we approached the last two rooms, luckily for me, my colleague stepped out of one, pretending like he went to ease himself.


The next scene can't be better explained, damn, picture Jet Li performing one of his legendary karate skills. They didn't even allow the girl to confirm if he was the one, blows, kicks, slaps and other things followed, I was just begging them but I kept my distance.

"Shey you sabi beat woman abi? You go die today", they kept saying as they pummeled him.

His girlfriend began crying and saying she didn't call them to manhandle her boyfriend, they threatened to beat her also if she questioned their authority.

They dragged him out like a criminal to their van, he managed to throw his phone to me, funny enough he knew them and was calling their names but that even increased his beatings.

Finally he was bundled into their van after dashing he some extra whip lashes before they jet off.

Chai, that was how the rest of my colleagues started getting off the ground, we were still trying to process what just took place.

I started making frantic calls to his family members and the case was quickly taken off, he was bailed that same day.

SARS claimed the lady never called them, that they were going on paroles and caught the guy molesting the lady inside bush, chaii I'll never forget this experience in my life.


So I'm in support of the #endSARS# movement, those folks have to go.


Wetin the guy come do im babe after every every?

2 Likes

Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by obinna58(m): 4:52pm On Dec 05
Worksunlimited:


Wetin the guy come do im babe after every every?
He married her
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by Therock5555(m): 4:59pm On Dec 05
lecturerdabo:
You sabi tell stories oo!
if e easy, tell your own na

Smh
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by Therock5555(m): 5:01pm On Dec 05
FoxyFlow:
As in TheRock has changed o... I wanted to comment on one of your "true" life stories about how you escaped being murdered but decided against it when someone else pointed out the flaws. I haven't read this one and I wouldn't read it.

Nigga, how far na? Iyaf tay o....

mehn brotherly, i greet you like wetiin

Its been awhile, where have you been?
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by 2shure: 5:01pm On Dec 05
my fwend
shut up
fool
we can like to fool ourselve
u fuckin hypocrite bich niggi
quiverfull:
Op, I was enjoying your story until you referred to Jesus as "bros J". That's familiarity taken too far. That's a dishonour to a name that has brought us salvation.
The same goes for those substituting "Jesus" for "X" in Christmas as in "Xmas", and "In Jesus Name" to "IJN".
Please, let's give honour to whom it is due.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by symbianDON(m): 5:03pm On Dec 05
Sage7:
.
see you booking space grin no let me call SARS for you o
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by ANTONINEUTRON(m): 5:04pm On Dec 05
quiverfull:
Op, I was enjoying your story until you referred to Jesus as "bros J". That's familiarity taken too far. That's a dishonour to a name that has brought us salvation.
The same goes for those substituting "Jesus" for "X" in Christmas as in "Xmas", and "In Jesus Name" to "IJN".
Please, let's give honour to whom it is due.
The Real Pronounciation Is Yeshua?? Since U Want To Call It Perfectly.

6 Likes

Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by Therock5555(m): 5:04pm On Dec 05
quiverfull:
Op, I was enjoying your story until you referred to Jesus as "bros J". That's familiarity taken too far. That's a dishonour to a name that has brought us salvation.
The same goes for those substituting "Jesus" for "X" in Christmas as in "Xmas", and "In Jesus Name" to "IJN".
Please, let's give honour to whom it is due.

So if i call you by the first letter of your namE, I‘ve committed a crime right?

BTW i wasn‘t writing in shorthand, Jesus is my friend, brother, father and saviour

Go Figure which ever suits you best

4 Likes

Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by Therock5555(m): 5:06pm On Dec 05
ritababe:
ok
Milady, how‘re you doing?
You and Missrock haff do me chun chin
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by Therock5555(m): 5:10pm On Dec 05
Worksunlimited:


Wetin the guy come do im babe after every every?

Unfortunately they‘ve made up, i advised him to dump the girl cos any girl that would call SARS for you ain‘t worth it but i guess love conquers all

1 Like

Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by lavendae(m): 5:14pm On Dec 05
My case with SARS was an ectic one,was traveling from edo state to school,so early in the morning i enter vehicle to the pack ,on our way going the driver was new to the route so he was just running through the poy hole before i knew it the car wind screen cracked and immediately the driver started complaining about the road and government, few minutes later road safety officials stopped us asked for everything and he gave them,they later asked why i was driving the car with a cracked screen ,immediately the driver and i told them its the road ooooo,they refused and told us lies,booked us 10k to go and pay in the bank and come back,so we refused and started arguing with them,one of the road safty man very weaked by now am sure he must have been killed by drunk drivers brought out is phone make a call and before we say jack robbison SARS men came drove in like james bond and the roaf safty man told them that we are robbers and before i could say oga na lie oooo,slaps rain on my face and they took us from EDO TO AKURE saying they will kill us along the road if we refused to pay 30k each,we were still locked up inside there vehicle boot at AKURE ,they brought us out took us to Atm requested for my ATM and pin ,as a stundent i was having 10k in my account those goat removed all the money and did same to the driver too ,left us there and swam away into tin air,SINCE THEN I SWEAR FOR THEM SAY HE NO GO BETTER FOR THEM ,am sure this is the result of my curse on them #END SARS BEFORE THEY END THE YOUTH

9 Likes 3 Shares

Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by cybriz82(m): 5:18pm On Dec 05
Pidginwhisper:
SARS just dey trend after Banky's Wedding :


Everyone just wan take SARS shine by fabricating storylines


I pray make them stop u one day,,,u will use ur mouth and confess all ur sins to them,d ones wey u don commit and d ones u are about to commit in future, those people no get joy at all,

1 Like 3 Shares

Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by cybriz82(m): 5:24pm On Dec 05
quiverfull:
Op, I was enjoying your story until you referred to Jesus as "bros J". That's familiarity taken too far. That's a dishonour to a name that has brought us salvation.
The same goes for those substituting "Jesus" for "X" in Christmas as in "Xmas", and "In Jesus Name" to "IJN".
Please, let's give honour to whom it is due.


Na ur type no dey make heaven.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by lovelylad(m): 5:25pm On Dec 05
undecided wu get time to read this million words article.

1 Like

Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by Pidginwhisper: 5:28pm On Dec 05
cybriz82:



I pray make them stop u one day,,,u will use ur mouth and confess all ur sins to them,d ones wey u don commit and d ones u are about to commit in future, those people no get joy at all,
my broda no stress yourself. The day dem stop me na that day we go know who get power pass btw SARS personnel and Military personnel. If you sabi any of them send me PM I go gladly forward my address. Good day.
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by Abudu2000(m): 5:41pm On Dec 05
Pidginwhisper:
SARS just dey trend after Banky's Wedding :


Everyone just wan take SARS shine by fabricating storylines
u seriously tink say na fabrications Abi, may SArs fall on u real soon b4 they are scrapped
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by darniejay(m): 5:44pm On Dec 05
Make me Sef talk my own, was returning from school Federal University Lokoja to be precise around 10pm one night with my friend, some guys in black clothes stopped us very close to the second gate and asked "where una dey come from" I was forming local champion and I answered from school na with my no smile on my face, he was like can I see your ID, I showed it to him and asked again "wetin dey your bag" na my books, laptop and phone I replied still not smiling, open am make I see, I reluctantly opened the bag and after searching through he was like no vex, dis one wey u dey look me like this, na because of una we dey here o, I was like no problem, then went my own way, didn't know that was the beginning o.
still on my way home very close to one cemetery, I saw 2 guys smoking cannabis and dey greeted us (my friend and I) we responded and they said Bros abeg make una come, I was like padi no mind dem make we dey go, again they said Bros I say make una come and una dey show una self abi, I told my friend again no mind dem jor, dem wan obtain us. My guy looked back and he was like dem dey come o, taking 2 steps at a time, I tell my guy make e no run o luckily d Yoruba boy no run den we waited. the following conversation took place:
SARS: we dey call una and una dey waka go abi
Me: we no know una that's why we dey waka na
SARS: some other people no stop una for road as una dey come?
Me: them stop us but them identify themselves
SARS: where una dey come from Sef
Me: na school na
SARS: open your bag make we see
Me: for wetin na (thinking these guys wan obtain me)
SARS: so u wan know who we be abi, who you be Sef
Me: As I no know una, una too no fit know me
SARS: calling out Umar (not real name){from one corner Oga sir, we dey come}
turning back, I saw some guys with cutlasses, sticks and guns (me: thinking my own don finish today o, shey I for just cooperate jejely, ah! na so my life wan come end?) my friend no utter a single word o, I sure say him soul don leave him body on sighting those guys. . .
Umar: oga see us here
SARS: show am your ID (putting on his torch)
Me: I no know say Na una (presenting my ID)
SARS: went through my ID and said oya make una dey go
My Friend: guy you too stubborn and you get mind, if Na only me I for don run
Me: baba nothing dey happen jor (in my mind I was like na so God dey save pesin? thank God o) I was actually shaking but since it was night, my friend couldn't notice as I was still making mouth
MORALS: know who you are and stand for yourself not all of them are bad I stand with the govt, #reorient SARS

6 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by Pidginwhisper: 5:44pm On Dec 05
Abudu2000:
u seriously tink say na fabrications Abi, may SArs fall on u real soon b4 they are scrapped
I go welcome dem with open arm my brother. I fear no Babylon. I sure say dem sef no go wan feel military might cheesy

1 Like

Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by NaijaBlend: 5:46pm On Dec 05
BUHARI!!!
Okay ooo!
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by Abudu2000(m): 5:48pm On Dec 05
Pidginwhisper:
I go welcome dem with open arm my brother. I fear no Babylon. I sure say dem sef no go wan feel military might cheesy
I'm convinced you are surely a kid! No matter who u are
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by ritababe(f): 5:51pm On Dec 05
Therock5555:
Milady, how‘re you doing?
You and Missrock haff do me chun chin
u back on WhatsApp? mail me ur WhatsApp number
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by ritababe(f): 5:51pm On Dec 05
Therock5555:
Milady, how‘re you doing?
You and Missrock haff do me chun chin
u back on WhatsApp? mail me ur WhatsApp number
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by AzeezAbubakar1: 5:51pm On Dec 05
ritababe:



na bros for stories, one of the best story writter on nairaland
i want to fork you kiss
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by M2dX(m): 5:53pm On Dec 05
obinna58:
He married her
how many kids did they have now??
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by Pidginwhisper: 5:56pm On Dec 05
Abudu2000:
I'm convinced you are surely a kid! No matter who u are
I'm a kid accepted. How about you Facilitate our meeting so as to lecture me on what it takes to be an adult like you.


Oops!lest I forget, don't forget to bring SARS along. Just make sure our meeting point is Lagos, venue doesn't matter wink
Re: My Funny But Frightening Experience With SARS Operatives!!! by Pataricatering(f): 5:57pm On Dec 05
Daddy j nko?
quiverfull:
Op, I was enjoying your story until you referred to Jesus as "bros J". That's familiarity taken too far. That's a dishonour to a name that has brought us salvation.
The same goes for those substituting "Jesus" for "X" in Christmas as in "Xmas", and "In Jesus Name" to "IJN".
Please, let's give honour to whom it is due.

2 Likes

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