I woke up this splendid Saturday morning quite late. I decided to sleep long into the morning and just be lazy. My body needs a lot of rest this period. Furthermore, I have been happy of late owing to the great news emanating from back home (Nigeria). I have been observing that the increasing hardship and poverty has been ‘polishing’ the brains of Nigerians.

When I saw the catholic church harass that ‘ogre of a clown’ in Imo State, I was impressed. When I saw Nigerians publicly put the government on the spotlight over fuel scarcity during the Christmas celebrations, I was impressed. When I read that people where no longer paying attention to those ‘overfed idiots’ called organized labour, my heart leapt for joy. When I read that workers in Osun State were proceeding on an indefinite strike, I was overjoyed.

As usual, when I saw those ‘bloated pigs’ gather in Abuja to approve $1 billion to fight insurgency despite repeated claims by the government that boko haram had been technically defeated, my heart sunk; that was a joy killer.

You can thus imagine my heartbreak to wake up this morning, and low and behold be confronted with the news – “Buhari appoints 3 dead men as board members”. In fact, Francis Okpozo who died December 2016, was appointed as the new chairman of the Nigerian Press Council (NPC). The other two (so far discovered) are Reverend Christopher Utov (who died March 2017) appointed to the board of the Nigerian Institute of Social and Economic Research (NISER) and Chief Donald Ugbaja (who died November 2017) appointed to the board of the Consumer Protection Council (CPC).

I have gone through most comments on nairaland and on deeper reflection, I have come to the following initial conclusions:
1. Buhari is not in charge of the affairs of governance of Nigeria. Owing to his long hiatus in the United Kingdom and frequent junketing around the globe for no benefit, coupled with revelations on the approved $20 billion NNPC contracts and other sundry allegations, one can easily decipher that there is a kitchen cabinet made up of unelected Nigerians who are known/unknown to the Nigerian public and who take major decisions that affect Nigeria.

2. Nigerians have been evaluated mentally and found to be IDIOTS. I am a Nigerian and thus I am not going to shy away from the fact that these miscreants in governance have evaluated Nigerians and found us to be IDIOTS. I will buttress this point subsequently. During the 2015 electioneering campaigns, some of the deliverables that the APC promised Nigerians where as follows:

• Security – Buhari led APC promised to within the first 3 months of their administration end boko haram. We cannot list the number of casualties recorded and continued to be recorded in the fight against boko haram. The Nigerian Army had to lie and recapitulate when they were exposed during the ‘senseless’ oil prospecting in the Chad basin. Even the security agencies have recorded hundreds (if not thousands) of casualties in the fight against insurgency. The recent approval for $1 billion in boosting the war against boko haram is a testament to the fact that 2 years after, the war has not been won. Wars are not fought with mouth. Wars are fought with strategic planning, credible intelligence gathering and counter-insurgency policies that are up to date. This is not 1967. Ask America about her failed wars in Vietnam, Iraq and Afghanistan. As at the time Buhari was pontificating about his ‘certain’ victory against insurgency he had forgotten that while criminals had modernised, the military had remained docile, archaic and been politically influenced. We now have a politically polarized military. Buhari underestimated the enemy and over-estimated his failed military career which saw him ejected out of office like hunting a rat from a hole. He failed to consider the preparedness of the Nigerian military and failed to eject politics out of the military. The end result is what we have today. Obasanjo though part of Nigeria’s problem, understood that a political military posed serious national threat, hence his utilization of Danjuma in weeding out political soldiers during his first term in office.

• Education – Free feeding for all school kids and free allowance for 1 extra year post NYSC for all graduates. That Nigerians fell for this scam shows how shallow minded we are. Who was going to bear the cost of this phantom project? What accountability structure was to be put in place? What statistics was available on number of public school children across the country? How was this project going to be sustained? As a social intervention program was this the best option? Could there have been a better alternative to mass feeding? What was the intended aim of this project? Nigerians didn’t care, we just believed. In Benin, they would say ‘Ozwor’.

• Oil – Stabilize global oil price at $100/barrel, reduce local fuel price to N45/Litre, stop importation of refined petroleum products within one year in office and build one new refinery every year for 4 years. I have been laughing for minutes now. At this juncture, I must confess that I’m confused on what really we are as Nigerians – mad, crazy, dead, stupid, fools, idiots, beasts, useless, clowns, I don’t know. How was Nigeria (not among the top five top oil producers) going to stabilize global oil price? We have not even been able to meet OPEC’s quota for us and yet we were going to be able to influence world price? In fact, OPEC recognized our uselessness and didn’t place any restrictions on our export capacity like they did to Saudi Arabia and others and yet, Buhari who doesn’t have school certificate was going to stabilize world oil price? On local price stabilization, oil price is expected to hit officially N200/litre next year (2018) from N145/litre (increased by this same clueless government). When I discovered that Dangote’s refinery (a private project) is now being supported massively by Nigeria and her arsenal (CBN, MoF, Commerce, customs etc.) and yet the project is still projected to be completed in 2019 then I begin to wonder how Buhari hoped to build 1 refinery per day.

• Power (electricity) – add 20 000 MW to the national grid in four years. If they say Nigerians need deliverance, I think that’s an understatement. Even South Africa has not been able to add 10 000 MW to her grid between 2008 and 2017 (that’s 9 years) despite World Bank financing. In fact, South Africa has had to re-commission already decommissioned coal power plants (despite utilizing old technology with higher emissions) just to have a high reserve margin. So how is Buhari expected to add 20 000 MW to our grid in four years (5 000 MW per year)? Where would he get the loans for the project (considering the fact that our foreign budgets have been underfunded consistently by up to 70%)? Where are the experts to man such projects? How is the investment going to be recouped? What plans are there to help in improving revenue collection and reduce ATC&C losses? These guys really took Nigerians for a joke!

• Employment – create 3 million jobs per year. Thank God for NBS (National Bureau of Statistics) that has constantly intimated us that unemployment rate has just increased to 18.8%. Continuing further, over 1.6 million Nigerians have left full time employment in just 3 months! With over 34 million Nigerians being unemployed/underemployed, that is 40% of Nigeria’s workforce. Thus, for nine consecutive quarters, unemployment has been on the increase in Nigeria. While Ngige claims that about 7 million jobs have been created, NBS intimates us that between January 2016 and September 2017, 8 million Nigerians have become unemployed. The government has not been able to realise that the economy locally is sustained by cottage industries that contribute over 50% to GDP and 70% of employment. Furthermore, the failure of this non-realization has seen government pay little attention to policies and programs that would sustain these industries and enable them thrive under harsh economic situations. As at August 2016, MAN hinted that about 272 local companies had closed shops in Nigeria due to forex restrictions with other industries at 20% capacity utilisation. Government has either decided to play deaf or is at loss on what to do. Recently, we were all shocked to discover that the government was hiring consultants from Malaysia to advice on ERGP which was conceptualized and developed by Nigerians. It is finished!

3. Religion has further helped in eliminating any little self-worth, self-esteem or self-value that remained in Nigerians owing to our fundamental problem of being IDIOTS. I will buttress this point subsequently. The recent debate over tithing in Nigeria coupled with the growing spate of allegations of misconduct perpetuated by religious clerics has revealed a lot about the religious centres in Nigeria. Humans with limit on living have been seen pontificating on the Nigeria sphere and speaking blasphemies. News media is awash with clerics who have and continue to subject their ‘followers’ to despicable acts. We have seen church members worshipping a chair a prominent cleric sat on, we have seen church members bringing comb to church to comb their hair, we have seen members told who to vote for in elections, we have seen church members humiliated by church leaders etc.

Aside this brainwashing, we have seen youths extend stupidity to higher extremes like the lady who decided to wear a hijab to her call to bar and folks who felt they were too religious to wear the khaki trousers for NYSC. Furthermore, we have seen NYSC camp opening dates shifted because some people were fasting etc.

4. Nigerians have no depth – Oh my, I have come across countless Nigerians and for the most, I have left disappointed! My discussions with them have shown over and over that our thinking process must have evolved parallel to the conventional thinking process of humans in the global north. Most Nigerians have a limited scope of what they want to do with their lives – no long-term goals, no excitement for adventure, no allowance for risks. They just want the easy way out. Most of them who are religious hide under the cloak of religiosity to excuse their short-comings. Others are more interested in results than process, hence short-cuts to them is not a crime! Most Nigerians have no plan! 2017 ends tomorrow and most Nigerians have no clear-cut plan of what they intend to do for the first quarter in 2018! They have expectation lists/cards of miracles that must be answered in 2018 with no plan on how to achieve anything. Many want good grades in school but have no study plan. Others are expecting a miracle job with no evaluation of their skills and a plan on how to have some competitive advantage. I have come across countless Nigerians who cannot anticipate problems/chaos and plan accordingly for them.

5. Nigerians might not be human beings – I know, I know, slow your roll. This is just an initial hypothesis! When I see Nigerians who are owed salaries for 20 months end up collecting salt (N500), groundnut oil (N2000) and N5000 to still vote for the same ‘beast’ who has deprived you of decent living for over 20 months, then I can conclude logically, that Nigerians might not be human beings. Maybe we are between animals and the folks in the global north. When a government can be so bold to say things that are not normal and yet Nigerians do not react as human beings, then it is either we have been deluded (another possible but extreme conclusion) or better still we are sub-humans/super-animals. The following statements should buttress my assertion.

• Lai Mohammed: “..the Fulani herdsmen are from Mauritius. They are here in Nigeria because of climate change…” (modified) Mbok!
• Ganduje: “…I’m only pretending to sleep at functions…” (modified) Incredible!
• Aregbesola: “I do not have a bank account as I have not earned salary since becoming a governor” (modified) Say what?!
• Femi Adesina: “Buhari has fulfilled his campaign promises” Aibo!
• Lai Mohammed: “One masquerade can create 1000 jobs” Jesus wept!
• Fashola: “Increasing meter installation will improve power supply” Iskaba!
• Lai Mohammed: “PMB government has spent almost N2trn on infrastructural projects. But you can’t see it because of the huge size of these projects.”

Let me go and do something profitable today. Everyday news from Nigeria is a nightmare. May God help us all.

This country is a joke

My guy laff won kill me here,na to migrate o,2018 come fast

Nigerians are subhumans who are modeled to exist under abnormal conditions. Take a handful of Nigerians and relocate to a separate community in the West and watch how they turn the place into an abnormal environment.

Thanks for the insight Chukwuka16

It has only gotten worse. I was in support of Buhari in 2015 and it's a shame to think I believed these 'promises'. Reading them now, it's a f*cking joke. Stabilise oil prices? LMAO


What pains me more is the fact that people still went ahead to vote the same people into power come 2019. I must agree that we are really stupid in this country.

Olalekank:
Thanks for the insight Chukwuka16

It has only gotten worse. I was in support of Buhari in 2015 and it's a shame to think I believed these 'promises'. Reading them now, it's a f*cking joke. Stabilise oil prices? LMAO


What pains me more is the fact that people still went ahead to vote the same people into power come 2019. I must agree that we are really stupid in this country.

People vote wetin?

Election that wasn't free and fare is that one election?

Olalekank:
Thanks for the insight Chukwuka16

It has only gotten worse. I was in support of Buhari in 2015 and it's a shame to think I believed these 'promises'. Reading them now, it's a f*cking joke. Stabilise oil prices? LMAO


What pains me more is the fact that people still went ahead to vote the same people into power come 2019. I must agree that we are really stupid in this country.

Sincerely speaking you can't really fault Nigerians. What options did they have? Also, MOST Nigerians are unenlightened and do not even know what governance entails or what to demand of elected officials.

It's painful to watch millions of Nigerians get thrown into the poverty cycle monthly and yet we can't demand answers. Hard times unfortunately are coming and I fear for millions more of Nigerians.

Ugmama:


People vote wetin?

Election that wasn't free and fare is that one election?

Despite the electoral malpractices Buhari still had massive support. There is a limit to rigging and the support they had meant little effort was needed to get reelected.

We have a pandemic of uneducated and unenlightened Nigerians who constitute a significant mass of the voting population and are in a position to elect our leaders.

If this group vows that Patience Jonathan will be Nigeria's next president, they are almost certain to achieve it.