I really hope God forgives me. I just wish intimacy with your loved one not every tom, dic*k and harry, just your loved one wasn't bad. God knows I love him, though I still fornicate as in have intimacy with my loved one. Help

Its not going to be easy,but i will join u in prayers. Go for councelling.

It takes discipline. It's like someone who has diabetes or ulcer and He's told not to eat some things that he loves. He does it because he wants to stay alive. Go and get married if it's time for that, but before then, hold body. That's part of overcoming TEMPTATION. Ask God for grace, and then don't go into the trap, you already know the steps that take you into fornication. Don't pass that same road. Flee like my brother Joseph. Wait for your time.

@ Toba, counselling is what she's get here (some Counsellors & Pastors are 'cancellers' of destiny). You must be careful how you send people for counselling.

@Lacrissa, follow @Image123's advice. Pray for forgiveness, have a deep discussion with your loved one and get married, so as to get rid of the guilt. You don't need to spend too much (don't follow society's opinion & don't try to impress or please anybody - it's your life, your future & your relationship with God that's at stake here).

Wedding is for a day (few hours); Marriage is for life - It's the understanding you have with your loved one, how you communicate and the life you spend together that matters.

All the best.

you only get one life so enjoy it ok. continue to do the thing that feels so sweet its called enjoyment

manmustwac:

you only get one life so enjoy it ok. continue to do the thing that feels so sweet its called enjoyment

Mr moderator which kind advise be this

Poster, i find myself in this dilemma, it's not easy.I keep falling into the same sin which i confessed and vow not to go back. I was advised by a Priest to get married hence that would help me avoid the temptation. I am seriously searching for a life partner and my present gf who is a serious Christian understands me well. If thing works out well, i may settle down this year by God's grace. All the same, know that you are not the only one facing this type of religious crisis (that's what i call it).

Image123:

It takes discipline. It's like someone who has diabetes or ulcer and He's told not to eat some things that he loves. He does it because he wants to stay alive. Go and get married if it's time for that, but before then, hold body. That's part of overcoming TEMPTATION. Ask God for grace, and then don't go into the trap, you already know the steps that take you into fornication. Don't pass that same road. Flee like my brother Joseph. Wait for your time.

Thanks for your advise, i pretty much try that because that is what we preach and hear in church everytime. But, how can you avoid intimacy with someone you really like and want to marry?

Poster, you know exactly what you are doing, or should i ask - Do you put food in your nose?
You can Choose between Fornication and God - for it is written "Choose you Who you shall Serve"

Life or Fornication?

link=topic=426896.msg5851489#msg5851489 date=1270708808:

Its not going to be easy,but i will join u in prayers. Go for councelling.

No amount of prayer can serve you - poster you have the Key to change.

it takes God grace,dont worry He will help you out.

May kelly:

Life or Fornication?

No amount of prayer can serve you - poster you have the Key to change.

But can we keep denying our sexuality? we all have sex written in our dna. Men usually have an erection when nothing happens at all and women most times get wet even without any arousal of some sort. It happens we should not deny it, but do we keep it in our selves and still leave in bondage? I cant deny sex and i feel free when i release my urge, i'm no longer in any bondage of any kind.

Or should we live in denial and tend not to notice sex in every facet of our life?

We can preach on and on, faceless people, but deep down within us be honest ith yourself. either you are having sex or you are killing yourself inside.

toba:

Mr moderator which kind advise be this

its not really advice its just my opinion, how can you guys say that the poster shouldn't do something that feels so sweet and nice?

Spyker
We avoid intimacy with someone you really like by avoiding intimacy. It's that simple. Some of these things don't even need spirituality, it's just discipline. We're human beings, not animals at least not in the same level. We have innate ability to some level of control. We don't just ease ourselves where it meets us, or start handling with other people's money, property or even body just because it feels good or we're excited. These are things normal sane people can do. I'm aware that there're people who need deliverance from spirits but that's not the case here. Let's be more careful and objective so as not to be controlled by the doctrine of it feels good. Very soon, it'll feel good for me to have all your laptops for myself. And when I'm excited I'll 'release'. Sorry I'm created in the image of God, not of a dog.

You may be using sex for a psychological "high". Why do you always feel the need to have sex? Even non-religious people do not feel the need to have casual sex all the time. Perhaps is time for some sessions with your local psychoanalyst?

If you need freedom for fornication or masturbation the only way out is to give your life to Jesus, become sanctified after that you'll find out that those things no longer interest you because your flesh becomes crucified.

babaearly:

But can we keep denying our sexuality? we all have intimacy written in our dna. Men usually have an erection when nothing happens at all and women most times get wet even without any arousal of some sort. It happens we should not deny it, but do we keep it in our selves and still leave in bondage? I cant deny intimacy and i feel free when i release my urge, i'm no longer in any bondage of any kind.

Or should we live in denial and tend not to notice intimacy in every facet of our life?

We can preach on and on, faceless people, but deep down within us be honest ith yourself. either you are having intimacy or you are killing yourself inside.

we are talking about fornication, do u get that.

babaearly:
I cant deny intimacy and i feel free when i release my urge, i'm no longer in any bondage of any kind. . either you are having intimacy or you are killing yourself inside.

or are you fornicating?

You can’t serve two masters but most of all you cant serve God and your desires.
Rom.8.7- and a person becomes an enemy of God when he is controlled by human nature for he does not obey God’s law and in fact cannot obey it.

See, you say you love God while you are already his enemy.

The only way we can show our love for God is by keeping his commandments for num.15.30 says anyone who sins DELIBERATELY is guilty of treating God with contempt and you cant treat someone you love with contempt.

The ball is in your court; you either sacrifice your passion so as to truly show your love to God [not merely saying it] or keep treating him as a common whose laws can be broken whenever it suits you.

Lacrissa:

I really hope God forgives me. I just wish intimacy with your loved one not every tom, dic*k and harry, just your loved one wasn't bad. God knows I love him, though I still fornicate as in have intimacy with my loved one. Help

Se.x is a perfectly natural instinct.

It is no different from hunger or thirst.

These instincts are given by the Creator for the propagation and survival of species.

Yes, Man being an advanced creature is entitled to deploy discretion in the excercise of his instincts.

And in terms of such discretion i can conceive of no higher principle than that which you are already applying: to wit - limiting your se.xual life to one person who you love deeply.

Any person who attempts to make you feel guilty for this simply has no understanding of existence, creation and nature.

Indeed such persons are a danger to all reason and commonsense.

The reality is that such persons have been indoctrinated by a bizzarre and most unnatural anti-se.x dogma which has its origins in misguided notions of morality deriving from religion and culture.

The only culture you should be beholden to is the culture of nature.

Examine it.

^LOL . . . . when I first saw the thread title, I laughed cos I knew it was DS type of topic.

I hope you have finished writing your book, or else what are you doing here?

@May Kelly & Tasma, kindly learn how to be considerate & empathize with others. Not going to a brothel, avoiding the loose girl in your neighbourhood or avoiding the numerous girls in your church (you don't have feelings for most) is totally different from, avoiding intimacy with the one you truly love , it takes a lot of grace (let him that thinks he's standing be careful lest he falls).

@Lacrissa, soak yourself deeply into more of study, meditation, worship when your mind begins to stray, remind yourself of the fear of God and his promises to those who stand, win the battle from your mind, continue to pray for Grace. Nothing shall separate us from the love of God, and finally like I said earlier, start planning for your marriage with all seriousness, to avoid the guilt that follows each time you give expression to your intimacy.

Lacrissa:

I really hope God forgives me. I just wish intimacy with your loved one not every tom, dic*k and harry, just your loved one wasn't bad. God knows I love him, though I still fornicate as in have intimacy with my loved one. Help

Lacrissa, see this topic already discussed at length

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-399034.0.html
Does this make me a carnal christian?

poster

its up to you what you want to do.

If you want to keep fornicating, its your decision.

If, as a Christian, you want to stop fornicating, its your decision.

little things like talking to your legs can also help you, you know.

No situation or temptation is new under the sun.

JeSoul:

^LOL . . . . when I first saw the thread title, I laughed cos I knew it was DS type of topic.

I hope you have finished writing your book, or else what are you doing here?

Am almost there but now sufferring some writers block.

Maybe cos am missing my fianceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

You remind me of who i used to be,i was a nymphomaniac. when i got born again,i askd GOD for grace to over come fornication,i never tried to end it on my own.so im asking you to tell him to help u, dont try to do it on your own just put your TRUST in him n HE will see u through.REMEMBER IF U TRULY LOVE HIM AS YOU SAY YOU WILL NOT HURT HIM,COZ U HURT HIM EACH TIME U FORNICATE.

Spyker:

Poster, i find myself in this dilemma, it's not easy.I keep falling into the same sin which i confessed and vow not to go back. I was advised by a Priest to get married hence that would help me avoid the temptation. I am seriously searching for a life partner and my present gf who is a serious Christian understands me well. If thing works out well, i may settle down this year by God's grace. All the same, know that you are not the only one facing this type of religious crisis (that's what i call it).Thanks for your advise, i pretty much try that because that is what we preach and hear in church everytime. But, how can you avoid intimacy with someone you really like and want to marry?

I hope u dont regret getting married because of se.x

Lacrissa:

I really hope God forgives me. I just wish intimacy with your loved one not every tom, dic*k and harry, just your loved one wasn't bad. God knows I love him, though I still fornicate as in have intimacy with my loved one. Help

Your problem is not fornication but LUST. If u can change ur perception, pray for grace and see through the eyes of God (while acknowledging ur imperfection). . .I believe u will overcome LUST.
You can only overcome fornication if u overcome lust.

Hi Noetic -

Can you kindly provide for me a working understanding of the term "fornication."

In doing so please consider the biblical etymology of the words translated as "fornication."

I will also appreciate a spiriritual discourse on exactly why such a natural instinct is clasified as sinful within the Judaic religious worldviews (Judaism, Christianity and Islam).

If you have the energy, that is.

Thanks.

Deep Sight:

Se.x is a perfectly natural instinct.

It is no different from hunger or thirst.

These instincts are given by the Creator for the propagation and survival of species.

Yes, Man being an advanced creature is entitled to deploy discretion in the excercise of his instincts.

ok.

And in terms of such discretion[b] i can conceive of no higher principle[/b] than that which you are already applying: to wit - limiting your se.xual life to one person who you love deeply.

That readily paints a picture of where ur heart lies. . . . .and where did u deduce this principle from?

Any person who attempts to make you feel guilty for this simply has no understanding of existence, creation and nature.

The dude personally feels guilty. . . . why? cos he has a conscience that says his inactions are wrong.

Indeed such persons are a danger to all reason and commonsense.

The reality is that such persons have been indoctrinated by a bizzarre and most unnatural anti-se.x dogma which has its origins in misguided notions of morality deriving from religion and culture.

why fight imaginary enemies? . . . , who has condemned him?

1. Your conclusion that his sexual life is healthy is influenced by your own debauched life style. There are millions of cultures outside of religion that FORBIDS sex outside marriage.

2. how do u explain these cultures mentioned above? and what is anti-s.ex dogma?

3. If u are a xtian. . . . live like one. . . that means do not sin. . . . .lust or fornication. . . . .

The only culture you should be beholden to is the culture of nature.

Examine it.

The same lie u keep repeating endlessly. .  .what is the culture of nature? what is nature's identity?

Deep Sight:

Hi Noetic -

Can you kindly provide for me a working understanding of the term "fornication."

In doing so please consider the biblical etymology of the words translated as "fornication."

I will also appreciate a spiriritual discourse on exactly why such a natural instinct is clasified as sinful within the Judaic religious worldviews (Judaism, Christianity and Islam).

If you have the energy, that is.

Thanks.

I go try small. , , .brb

noetic16:


The dude personally feels guilty. . . . why? cos he has a conscience that says his inactions are wrong.

I positively assert that his feelings of guilt do not arise from his conscience as it is incongruous to imagine conscience acting in direct opposition to natural urges springing forth from the core of the human nature and indeed the metaphysical principle of duality which is the spiritual anchor for the necessity of sexual relations in existence.

I place it to you that the said feelings of guilt arise only from the misconceptions forced on the OPs mind by misguided notions of morality driven by ancient and achaiac religions.

But I would rather you deal with my request concerning the meaning of the word "fornication" before we proceed.

Deep Sight:

I positively assert that his guilt does not arise from his conscience as it is incongruous to imagine conscience acting in direct opposition to natural urges springing forth from the core of the human nature and indeed the metaphysical principle of duality which is the spiritual anchor for the necessity of sexual relations in existence.

Your assertions are very misplaced and wrong.

1. The dude considers his fornication a PROBLEM and seeks solution to it. . . that simply infers that he feels guilty. The source of his guilt cannot be traced to religion but to beliefs which are influenced by the conscience.

2. The conscience remains an independent part of the human existence. That explains why billions of people from millions of different cultures have the same abominations. It is not a coincidence, it is a testament to the universality of the human conscience.

I place it to you that the said feelings of guilt arise only from the misconceptions forced on the OPs mind by misguided notions of morality driven by ancient and achaiac religions.

why are religious notions with regards to fornication MISCONCEPTIONS? how do they constitute misconceptions?
The scope of morality transcends the scope of religion. . . , , your fraudulent notion called "nature" is also a misguided religious dogma.

But I would rather you deal with my request concerning the meaning of the word "fornication" before we proceed.

ok.

I sense deepsight is about to take noetic to the cleaners again!

@Deepsight
I doubt if noetic would be able to give an honest answer to your question.

Noetic –

I am not sure you are reading me carefully.

I stated that  - “it is incongruous to imagine conscience acting in direct opposition to natural urges springing forth from the core of the human nature and indeed the metaphysical principle of duality which is the spiritual anchor for the necessity of sexual relations in existence.” –

Thus implying –

1. Conscience cannot militate against natural instincts given for survival
2. Conscience thus cannot militate against eating food, for example
3. Conscience cannot militate against response to stimuli – as this is natural
4. Se.xu.al intercourse is a function of response to stimuli as well as a natural instinct which ensures the propagation of the species
5. Conscience can therefore not militate against seksual intercourse

The foregoing is iron-cast and I challenge you to dispute it.

Secondly I hold that the principle of duality inherent in existence is pivotal to se.xu.ality, and renders it inescapable – an absolutely ineluctable and involuntary aspect of our nature which we cannot repudiate.

noetic16:

The source of his guilt cannot be traced to religion but to beliefs which are influenced by the conscience.

Don’t you think the reverse is the case - namely conscience which is influenced by beliefs?

2. The conscience remains an independent part of the human existence. That explains why billions of people from millions of different cultures have the same abominations. It is not a coincidence, it is a testament to the universality of the human conscience.

Have you not noticed that there is the same universal tendency to criminalize all things which are intensely pleasurable?

Anyway, lets not be distracted – define fornication and then we proceed.

Deep Sight:

Hi Noetic -

Can you kindly provide for me a working understanding of the term "fornication."

Fornication includes . . . . .  , the act of sex between
a. two unmarried persons
b. two married persons or a married person and an unmarried person (adultery)
c. Any form of idolatry.
d. lust
e. prostitution and other se.xual professional services.
f. homosexuality

In doing so please consider the biblical etymology of the words translated as "fornication."

unfortunately, I am not a hebrew or greek linguist and would not trust google for translation and opinion  

I understand the greek word is porneia and it appears 26 times in the NT. however, the greek definition of the word encompasses my above definition of fornication.

I will also appreciate a spiriritual discourse on exactly why such a natural instinct is clasified as sinful within the Judaic religious worldviews (Judaism, Christianity and Islam).

1. Judaism and Christianity do not have a case against se.x. Cos sex is the modus operandi through which God intends to fulfil His decree that we be fruitful and multiply. But this blessing is intended to be channelled through the right path i.e twas not designed to be abused.

God designed sex for man's pleasure and for reproduction but chose to forbid man from abusing this gift. Leviticus 18 tells of every one we are forbidden to have sex with.

2. Christianity differs with Judaism cos Jesus would later state that LUST is now as guilty as the full act fornication (mathew 5:28)

Fornication is like any other sin. .  . .it is simply a DISOBEDIENCE to the command of God.

3. Islam does not practically discourage lust/fornication. the islamic allah actually had a wife called allat and together they had three daughters. mohammed also married 11 wives as against 4 which allah commanded . . . , because he could not keep his d.ick in his pants. . , the haddiths actually describe mohammed with an animal-like sex.ual appetite.

the koran's allah also continuously encourages eternal se.x by promising terorists 72 virgins in an imaginary paradise. thereby millions of muslim faithfuls are lustfully serving allah with the hope of receiving 72 virgins.