i was in a relationship for 3 years, which came to an end abruptly. i must confess i was very devastated and heart broken. A month after the heart break i met another guy. We started out as friends, nothing serious but it was a distance relationship. it felt like a relief for me after the break up, one thing led to another and 4 months after, he proposed to me and we decided to get married. Now am married to this man, but all along i knew we dnt quite match well but i felt he was quite ok. Am 5months into this marriage and i can tell you am very unhappy and the guy doesn't seem to make it easy for me. we have very different views, while dating i used to enjoy having conversations with him, now the conversations are mere arguments. He aint even as nice as he proved to be while we'd met. I have been thinking and trying to analyze what the problem is cos we fight almost everyday on issues that i must confess aint worth the trouble. My husband doesn't even confide in me, nor involve me in his decisions, i only get to hear about them weeks after.
Which is why i came to the realization that i think i married my rebound guy ( dnt realize he was my rebound guy till now ). I want to be happy, i need to be happy.
WHAT CAN I DO?!!!

stay there, pray for him and with him, patience is the word here - he will change -

try not to nag or argue with him, just be the best you can- see him as the head, see him as your lovely husband, dont see him as a rebound, maybe thats where your problem lies-

what is the meaning of a rebound though - anyone you meet after you break with your ex will always be a rebound, no matter the number of years,

seek marriage counselor together

My dear, you need to stop looking and treating him as a rebound guy, treat him like your man, respect him, dont be agressive or defensive, try not to argue, when you feel like responding to his arguements just put your hads on your chest and tell your self silently to calm down, pamper him, suprise him by taking him out for a pinic you have planned. Treat him like your husband, he will treat you like his wife. men have big egos if he senses that he is second best or that you treat him like secod best he will react the way he is acting now

BB25:

i was in a relationship for 3 years, which came to an end abruptly. i must confess i was very devastated and heart broken. A month after the heart break i met another guy. We started out as friends, nothing serious but it was a distance relationship. it felt like a relief for me after the break up, one thing led to another and 4 months after, he proposed to me and we decided to get married. Now am married to this man, but all along i knew we dnt quite match well but i felt he was quite ok. Am 5months into this marriage and i can tell you am very unhappy and the guy doesn't seem to make it easy for me. we have very different views, while dating i used to enjoy having conversations with him, now the conversations are mere arguments. He aint even as nice as he proved to be while we'd met. I have been thinking and trying to analyze what the problem is cos we fight almost everyday on issues that i must confess aint worth the trouble. My husband doesn't even confide in me, nor involve me in his decisions, i only get to hear about them weeks after.
Which is why i came to the realization that i think i married my rebound guy ( dnt realize he was my rebound guy till now ). I want to be happy, i need to be happy.
WHAT CAN I DO?!!!

u answered ur own question. he's a rebound guy. u fell for him for the wrong reasons. wish u the best of luck cos u go need am plenty

The problem is you didn't really get to know him before you married him and unfortunately now that you are getting to know him, its proving that you know you would.t have married him if you had gone out longer.

Advice: Get with the program. Start learning to appreciate the good things about him. It may be difficult but try. You can make this work because there's no perfect man anywhere. There's no telling what pains you might have had even if you had married the other guy. So make it wok. Look for the good points and work with those. Also stop seeing him as the rebound guy and start treating him like the king of your heart and he may just reciprocate. Don't forget he also is only beginning to know you and he may not be liking what he's seeing.

it is u that can make up the happiness that u want, accept to be happy.the impafection u now see in him was due to the short dating u both had. do not do wat i am thinking while reading ur thread

it is u that can make up the happiness that u want, accept to be happy.the impafection u now see in him was due to the short dating u both had. do not do wat i am thinking while reading ur thread.stay humble

Concentrate more on his good side. Do not see him as a rebound or any such thing. Treat him well and no matter the heat, don't argue with him. Ask God for wisdom, because it takes God to make a marriage work.

@labiyemmy:

what is the meaning of a rebound though - anyone you meet after you break with your ex will always be a rebound, no matter the number of years,

To marry on the rebound: Loveless marriage to the first person that comes ones way just to get over a disappointment or break in a long term relationship.
And I disagree with the last bit, she could have waited, she could have found love again and that wouldn't be on the rebound!

if u change the way u look at things, the things u look at will change,

^^^ very nice

PLEASE SAVE YOUR MARRIAGE. Our grandparents tolerate themselves and have long endless marriage even though their marriages were arranged without dating. I WILL BE PRAYING FOR YOU.

This is were i must marry gets you to; very soon we shall here he is cheating on me

You can not eat ur cake and have it.

This is what happens when one marries for marriage sake and not for true love.
is too late to backout from the marriage now gurl.you gat to be strong and learn
to talk to him and pray for him.