Little things that count. Family)

   I almost lost one of my daughters last week. It was only God who saved me. It was all my fault, I accept, it was my fault. You see, Whenever my kids come to me to say 'Dad, Cynthia is beating me' I will  refer her to her mother saying, ' You people  should  stop disturbing  me go and meet your mum'.  When another one comes,  'Dad my head aches' I will  simply refer him to his mother.  I feel within me,  I don't have the time to attend to endless report and complain  that  children give. They can ask questions! They can report issues! With time, they got use to meeting their mother to report  'My head aches,  she slapped me, she is this, she is that' She seemed to have the capacity for their complaints, reports and the attention they sought; saying sorry to him,  attending to her, rebuking them. So we only played when I have time but when there was something serious, they went to their mother.
     Cynthia had been having stomach pain for days but she did not tell me.  The mother was not around. She kept it to herself because she didn't know what to get from me.  It got worse day by day until Thursday, when her mother called, she asked to speak to them. The only thing  Cynthia said was,  'Mum my stomach is aching me,  I have been purging, come back soon'. She then gave the phone to me. My wife was mad at me, 'How on earth could such be, you are at home with these kids and you cannot even care for them' I could not say much than, 'I will take her to the hospital'. Mere looking at her, she was weak and fading.
I took her to the hospital where the doctor place her on emergency,  she  had loss too much water and nutrient. All the time she was there, she spoke less to me of her pain but I saw her speak more on how she felt to the doctor. I felt bad and knew I have missed it somewhere. Looking inward, I found  out that I have always sent them off to their mother. To make them come telling what  they felt, won't work anymore. I have shown them that their mother  was the one to listen to what they felt and how they felt it.  What I now do is to ask them how they feel and what is happening around them, They always feel free to tell me but not until I have asked. My wish every father, will make it part of them to listen to their kids and get close to them.

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