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Like Yourself First - Romance - Nairaland

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Can You Marry Someone Like Yourself ? (2) (3) (4)

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Like Yourself First by Boldwinner(m): 8:34pm On Apr 04, 2018
We live in a world where many people want to be liked. We want to be seen and appreciated. We want other people to like the good things about us and appreciate our unique gifts or talents.

This isn't a bad thing. Who doesn't want to be liked by others? Being likeable to many people is actually an advantage for you.

A problem only arises out of this normal human desire when you focus on other people liking you without liking yourself first.

This is where many of us get it all wrong. When you crave for other people to like you, but you don't even like yourself at all.

There was this young lady who was obsessed with men liking her. She did everything to get a man's heart and keep the man to herself, but all the men she kept dating left her after sometime.

This happened repeatedly and it took some counseling for the girl to understand what the problem really was.

She didn't like herself at all. And therefore, she thought that getting those likes from men outside would help her fill up the emptiness she felt by being unhappy with herself.

She failed to understand that it was impossible to fill herself up with something that is not already within her.

The men she had met somehow felt that emptiness and lack of happiness about herself in her heart and that somehow pushed them way.

"Whatever you don't have inside of you will always manifest itself."

A chat with a counselor revealed that the girl didn't like herself, her background and the way she looked. The counselor advised her to try something new.

He told her to make a conscious decision to start loving and appreciating herself the way she was without waiting on any man to do it it for her. She also told her to extend this attitude to whatever things about her that she resented.

It was difficult for this young lady to practice this exercise. I mean, all her life, she has been used to not liking herself the way she was, the force of habit was already working in her.

A day, two days, one week.. She kept on trying even though she fell back to the attitude sometimes. But whenever she was conscious of her decision, she will feel good about herself and appreciate the way she is.

That was how her life started transforming for good after some time . She reported back to the counselor months later and was filled with lots of good news.

She reported that people started being nice to her even without her trying too hard to please them. She started to discover some gifts about herself that she never paid attention to.

She generally felt better and she is happier because she wasn't really expecting much from the outside anymore. She had learnt to generate a natural liking for herself from within.

The experience of this young lady isn't so different from what many of us experience. You might be a man experiencing the same thing. It might not be exactly her case, but you might be battling with something similar which stems from not liking who you are.

Look, it's a must that you possess that natural likeness for your own self. When it comes from yourself, you won't need to depend on external validation or acceptance to feel good about who you are.

If you dress up in a nice cloth, compliment yourself first! Look yourself in the mirror and say "You look awesome." Don't wait for anybody to say it to you first.

If you post something on Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, be the first to like it. If you found it worthy of posting, then I can bet that it is an awesome post.
So immediately you post it, like it first. You don't have to wait until someone does that.

You must form the habit of being the first person to appreciate yourself. Like and appreciate yourself by yourself. It will make you feel better and you'll be amazed at how efficient you'll become.

It's not like being liked by others is undesirable. It is desirable and should be enjoyed as an additional bonus. But first, you have to like yourself before any other thing!

I don't know what it is that you don't like about yourself that makes you look down on yourself and expect other people to be the first to tell you how amazing you are.

Is it the way you look? Is it your performance in academics? Is it how you think your life is turning out? Is it your family background? Is it what?

Whatever it is that is making you not to like yourself as God has created you to be, I'm saying you should screw all of that. They don't matter at all. They're all garbage.

Whatever reason that is making you to feel bad about yourself should be thrashed. You should completely ignore it and try liking yourself first for who you are.

Appreciate whatever little things you're grateful for in your life. See the good in yourself. Always see the good in yourself. Because you get more of what you see.

Eckart Tolle said and I quote "Acknowledging all the good that you already have in your life is the foundation of all abundance."

How many people are acknowledging the good in their lives? Many are just busy acknowledging only the bad in their lives and the things they don't like. How can such people ever like themselves?

If there's anything that you don't like about yourself, my dear, just accept it if it's something you cannot correct and begin to love it that way.

When you begin to love aspects of yourself that you always hated, you will..

Read the full article here:
https://www.boldwinner.com/2018/04/like-yourself-first.html
More inspiration on www.boldwinner.com

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Re: Like Yourself First by makydebbie(f): 8:49pm On Apr 04, 2018
So op, I feel this article.

If only we know how people easily forget the dead, we'll stop living to please people.


Overcome the fear of what others think, their opinions don't really matter. Once you can do that unapologetically and stop taking what people say personal, you'll be one powerful person. You only live once, so what's the point in trying to prove yourself to others when they would forget you that moment and move on to the next thing in their agenda.

People who live for the camera are considered fake imo. They're never happy. Because whatever decision they want to make, their main aim is, will these guys like it? Even when those guys don't care most time. They hail you, so what's next? They move on with their lives but the question is, are you happy? Are you proud of what you're doing? Do you find fulfillment in it? Go for it.


Trying to please people is like pouring water in a basket, they'll rebrand you into what they want. Do what makes you happy, do it unapologetically, don't dim your shine because of what people think, they really don't care and don't matter too.

The ultimate goal is to be happy, but don't be lost in it. You first, before anyone else. smiley

4 Likes

Re: Like Yourself First by Nobody: 9:11pm On Apr 04, 2018
makydebbie:
Okay, so this is a beautiful thread, lemme read all.
Any Thing About Self Liking, na There We De See You...
Re: Like Yourself First by Twoclans(f): 9:11pm On Apr 04, 2018
In this game of life you need to really like yourself before anyone can like you. Truth be told once you are in love with who you are you can hardly notice anybody.
Re: Like Yourself First by makydebbie(f): 9:14pm On Apr 04, 2018
DeadRat:
Any Thing About Self Liking, na There We De See You...
If I don't love myself first, who will?

2 Likes

Re: Like Yourself First by Boldwinner(m): 9:18pm On Apr 04, 2018
makydebbie:
So op, I feel this article.

If only we know how people easily forget the dead, we'll stop living to please people.


Overcome the fear of what others think, their opinions don't really matter. Once you can do that unapologetically and stop taking what people say personal, you'll be one powerful person. You only live once, so what's the point in trying to prove yourself to others when they would forget you that moment and move on to the next thing in their agenda.

People who live for the camera are considered fake imo. They're never happy. Because whatever decision they want to make, their main aim is, will these guys like it? Even when those guys don't care most time. They hail you, so what's next? They move on with their lives but the question is, are you happy? Are you proud of what you're doing? Do you find fulfillment in it? Go for it.


Trying to please people is like pouring water in a basket, they'll rebrand you into what they want. Do what makes you happy, do it unapologetically, don't dim your shine because of what people think, they really don't care and don't matter too.

The ultimate goal is to be happy, but don't be lost in it. You first, before anyone else. smiley

This is lovely.. can we be friends?
Re: Like Yourself First by Nobody: 9:19pm On Apr 04, 2018
This is how Narcissicus started, we all know how he ended *inserts witches laugh *cheesy
Re: Like Yourself First by Nobody: 9:19pm On Apr 04, 2018
makydebbie:
If I don't love myself first, who will?



*Singing*

If You Ask Me

na Who I Go Ask...


But The Bible Said, we should love our Neighbour As we Love ourselves...
Re: Like Yourself First by Boldwinner(m): 9:19pm On Apr 04, 2018
DeadRat:
Any Thing About Self Liking, na There We De See You...
hahaha.. Is that so?
Re: Like Yourself First by Boldwinner(m): 9:20pm On Apr 04, 2018
Twoclans:
In this game of life you need to really like yourself before anyone can like you. Truth be told once you are in love with who you are you can hardly notice anybody.

On point. Though I think you'll still have to notice people so you can live comfortably.

1 Like

Re: Like Yourself First by Boldwinner(m): 9:21pm On Apr 04, 2018
MariaLavina:
This is how Narcissicus started, we all know how he ended *inserts witches laugh *cheesy

You're not Narcissicus. This is how people keep judging themselves and how they will end up.
Re: Like Yourself First by Nobody: 9:31pm On Apr 04, 2018
Boldwinner:


You're not Narcissicus. This is how people keep judging themselves and how they will end up.
You aren't deep, this is how you keep misleading people without noting that there should be a limit to self love. Life is about balance smiley
Re: Like Yourself First by BossLaifay(f): 9:32pm On Apr 04, 2018
Boldwinner:
We live in a world where many people want to be liked. We want to be seen and appreciated.
See post! Chei! Chilled bottle of malt for you poster!!!! kiss

1 Like

Re: Like Yourself First by Boldwinner(m): 9:37pm On Apr 04, 2018
MariaLavina:
You aren't deep, this is how you keep misleading people without noting that there should be a limit to self love. Life is about balance smiley

Sweetheart, you're entitled to your opinion. I can't let you ruin my evening with your unverified opinions. If you think I'm anything, you're right.
Re: Like Yourself First by Boldwinner(m): 9:39pm On Apr 04, 2018
BossLaifay:
See post! Chei! Chilled bottle of malt for you poster!!!! kiss

Malt?! of all drinks.. I will act like I didn't see this.
Re: Like Yourself First by makydebbie(f): 9:39pm On Apr 04, 2018
Boldwinner:


This is lovely.. can we be friends?
Sure. kiss
Re: Like Yourself First by makydebbie(f): 9:40pm On Apr 04, 2018
DeadRat:



*Singing*

If You Ask Me

na Who I Go Ask...


But The Bible Said, we should love our Neighbour As we Love ourselves...
Our neighbors don't love us, don't be deceived. grin
Re: Like Yourself First by Nobody: 9:41pm On Apr 04, 2018
Boldwinner:


Sweetheart, you're entitled to your opinion. I can't let you ruin my evening with your unverified opinions. If you think I'm anything, you're right.
If my opinion has the ability of ruining your evening, I suggest you read this thread of yours every two hours. You need it. byesmiley
Re: Like Yourself First by Boldwinner(m): 9:44pm On Apr 04, 2018
MariaLavina:
If my opinion has the ability of ruining your evening, I suggest you read this thread of yours every two hours. You need it. byesmiley

lol.. And who told you that your opinion has that ability? That's why I told you I can't let it happen.
I know you're probably looking for some attention from me. I'm ready to give you some, but learn to like yourself without fear of being narcissistic. It will help you. Goodnight.
Re: Like Yourself First by BossLaifay(f): 9:44pm On Apr 04, 2018
Boldwinner:
Malt?! of all drinks.. I will act like I didn't see this.
Hahahahaha. So you cannot be modest and say "bring am"?

You want to act like you only drink Veuve Clicquot because you're online abi? cheesy

Oya manage malt! 'Tis a good post! I love it!

1 Like

Re: Like Yourself First by Nobody: 9:45pm On Apr 04, 2018
Boldwinner:


lol.. And who told you that your opinion has that ability? That's why I told you I can't let it happen.
I know you're probably looking for some attention from me. I'm ready to give you some, but learn to like yourself without fear of being narcissistic. It will help you. Goodnight.
you make me laugh, I typed bye long ago.
Re: Like Yourself First by Nobody: 9:47pm On Apr 04, 2018
makydebbie:
Our neighbors don't love us, don't be deceived. grin
This Is Nigeria, neighbourly love Is Scarce...
Re: Like Yourself First by Boldwinner(m): 9:47pm On Apr 04, 2018
BossLaifay:
Hahahahaha. So you cannot be modest and say "bring am"?

You want to act like you only drink Veuve Clicquot because you're online abi? cheesy

Oya manage malt! 'Tis a good post! I love it!
hahaha.. can you imagine?
The funny thing is that I don't know Veuve Clicqouot.. I'll prefer the Campari Vivanapolis
Re: Like Yourself First by makydebbie(f): 9:49pm On Apr 04, 2018
DeadRat:
This Is Nigeria, neighbourly love Is Scarce...
In Africa too.
Re: Like Yourself First by Boldwinner(m): 9:51pm On Apr 04, 2018
MariaLavina:
you make me laugh, I typed bye long ago.
Love, admit that I make you think.
If you really like yourself, you cannot be narcissistic. A narcissist doesn't give a shit about the feelings of others and that puts him or her into unnecessary rivalry, conflict and danger.
If you really liked yourself, you'll put your interests first while considering other people..
They are two different things. You can meditate on that as you sleep.
Re: Like Yourself First by BossLaifay(f): 9:52pm On Apr 04, 2018
Boldwinner:

hahaha.. can you imagine?
The funny thing is that I don't know Veuve Clicqouot.. I'll prefer the Campari Vivanapolis
Lol. Ok. A glass of Campari Vivanapolis on the rocks for you then. Where is the bartender? angry
Re: Like Yourself First by BossLaifay(f): 9:54pm On Apr 04, 2018
DeadRat:
This Is Nigeria, neighbourly love Is Scarce...
makydebbie:
In Africa too.
In fact in the entire world! People are getting so hostile to each other!
Re: Like Yourself First by Nobody: 9:55pm On Apr 04, 2018
Boldwinner:

Love, admit that I make you think.
If you really like yourself, you cannot be narcissistic. A narcissist doesn't give a shit about the feelings of others and that puts him or her into unnecessary rivalry, conflict and danger.
If you really liked yourself, you'll put your interests first while considering other people..
They are two different things. You can meditate on that as you sleep.
A quick search on google will save you further embarrassment Mister. I can't deal with this amount of contradictions.
Re: Like Yourself First by makydebbie(f): 9:59pm On Apr 04, 2018
BossLaifay:

In fact in the entire world! People are getting so hostile to each other!
Yea, I agree.
Re: Like Yourself First by Nobody: 10:00pm On Apr 04, 2018
makydebbie:
In Africa too.
Infact the Matter Weak Me... In My Area Now, when You Walk At Night And Pass People, everybody Will Be Looking At Each Other Face, when You Pass They'd Still Be Looking Back Until You Are 50meters Away... Nobody Trust Anybody...
Re: Like Yourself First by Boldwinner(m): 10:00pm On Apr 04, 2018
BossLaifay:
Lol. Ok. A glass of Campari Vivanapolis on the rocks for you then. Where is the bartender? angry

The drink doesn't exist
Re: Like Yourself First by Nobody: 10:02pm On Apr 04, 2018
BossLaifay:

In fact in the entire world! People are getting so hostile to each other!
i Just Weak... Nobody Know Where We Are Heading Again...

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