JasonScolari:
You're confused. I believe the stranger did not put a rope round your neck and dragged you like a goat to the altar... You can't stand up for yourself and take decisions yourself without the interference of your parents who only see you as a sacrificial lamb to cancel poverty?


You played yourself girl (according to my friend, Thegeneralqueen)


I am sorry, you can't eat your cake and have it So remain where you are. I wish you well.

No, you're wrong here. If she wants divorce, she should go for it.

[color=#770077][/color]for sakes, you guys do not necessarily need to throw abuses.. Anyone could be wearing those shoes... Any Mrs.. The deed has been done, you were been indecisive and aware of present circumstances to get married... You could create love we're there is no love... Start loving him..
You are still very conscious of the love that you have with your ex

thorpido:
Why rush yourself into marriage in the first place?
You wanted obodo oyinbo things?
You better try to make your marriage work.You just got married two months ago so why not give the marriage a try.You could grow together as time goes by.

As for your ex,I think you are just fooling yourself.You said he used to hide his phone,if you ever get back together,i hope he won't have to hide you one day.

MrHistorian:
This is what you get when the apex of a woman's success is pegged at her marital status ; getting terribly misled at all front.

From what I gathered, you were pressured to marry your present husband by your parents? You are a disgrace to adulthood. I wonder if you'd have agreed to walk into a burning fire if you were ordered by your parents. Deed is done, file for a divorce and get off that sham/charade disguised as a marriage.

I DO NOT advise you go back to your ex because both of you are clearly immature.

Two opposing advice but I like to them both. But the truth is that that marriage may never work.

The last thing I would do is to condemn you. You have made a big mistake, please don't make a bigger one. Try everything possible to forget your ex. Your focus now should be on your husband. I'm sure if you look well, you will see one or two things you like about him. Give the new relationship a try and see it flourish with time. You didn't mention in your post that he treats you badly, I guess he's a great guy. Invest your emotion, time and resources to make it work before it's too late so you don't live your remaining life in regret.

Just start loving him

Your emotions are deceptive.Never trust it.I am sure if you work on yourself the love for your husband will develop, just accept him, forgive your parents and forgive yourself as well.You are carried away by mundane things so are your parents so you guys got trapped into this. If you carry out your desire now you will be creating a fire u don't have the capacity to quench.I will advise you let your ex go and stay with your husband.

Nice one ...

larrybee2017:
And you think your Ex will celebrate his new package when you finally divorce your husband? Only an insane man will do that. You better start building your love for this niggar from foundation before you spoil show for yourself

Go to your ex. Life is too short to be unhappy.

Please forget that thing you call "love" and concentrate on building your home. That stupid feeling we call "love" is the worst reason for anybody to marry because it makes you throw away common sense to the bin and marry an 1diot only to clear from our eyes and leave us to face reality few years (sometimes months) into the marriage.
This is why many marriages are crashing these days. Our parents had the best of marriages because they never married for "love"! They married for great family ties and common sense and that held their marriages.

Op, try and get pregnant and start bearing children. You will get better when kids start rolling in.

i took time to read and liked more than 15 comments...
onishinor ni e...shinor ti ba aye e je walai... see! person no dey enter water kon dey complain cold...

manage the one wey you get,nah you choose am... loo be shoogbo, aye loo be lawa

our9ja:
So Nancy you brought this issue down to Nairaland

Who's Nancy

My dear, who love help? Be wise and build your new home. If your acclaimed love for your ex was beneficial things would have been a whole lot different. Ranging from His attitude towards you and His family unacceptance of you, you still want to go back there. No wa for you oo. indeed wonders shall never end. ! If you love your life and your future stay away from your ex and build your new family. Love is built overtime. BE WISE.

You got what you want. You knew you parent will never object when you tell them about the abroad guy

I guess the op

Blonchilli:

Who's Nancy

How old are you? well that doesn't matter, all I want to say is that you're confused and not matured to be married. You seem not to have a mind of your own.

lalasticlala:
A Nairalander who seriously needs advice sent in this mail. Please read and advise her. Thanks


"I Am still in love with my ex but I am married to a stranger


I wish to seek advice from nairalanders. I will accept insults. I just got married 2 months ago.

Let me start by saying I dated my ex for 4 years. We loved ourselves but you know as the year went by, my ex started showing some attitudes like hiding his phone when sleeping. Also his parents came up that we can't marry, simply becauss I am not same state with him.

While all this played out, this friend of mine connected me to a guy whom came back from abroad to marry. I saw the guy but didn't like him but before we met. I already informed my parents about this guy from abroad who likes me a lot. Without seeking for my approval. My parents got carried away and insisted that it's him they want, not my ex anymore. Out of fustration and pressure I married this new guy but I feel no love for him. My ex also wants me back and I want same because I love him.

I plan to divorce my husband because I can't stand that he Will be my husband for life. I don't love him.

Please advise me."

You either marry who you love or love who you marry....Is your husband beating you? Is he good to you? Does he love you? Ur only reason for divorce is dat you don't love him, what a baby brain! Who told you dat the man you claim you love will make a better husband? I have seen couples who love themselves turn to cat and dog and eventually part ways.....Go and love your husband and forget distractors!

Please one question, what did the husband do wrong to her What is his offense??

You said you will accept insults right?

YOU ARE STUPID

Have a great day

lalasticlala:
A Nairalander who seriously needs advice sent in this mail. Please read and advise her. Thanks


"I Am still in love with my ex but I am married to a stranger


I wish to seek advice from nairalanders. I will accept insults. I just got married 2 months ago.

Let me start by saying I dated my ex for 4 years. We loved ourselves but you know as the year went by, my ex started showing some attitudes like hiding his phone when sleeping. Also his parents came up that we can't marry, simply becauss I am not same state with him.

While all this played out, this friend of mine connected me to a guy whom came back from abroad to marry. I saw the guy but didn't like him but before we met. I already informed my parents about this guy from abroad who likes me a lot. Without seeking for my approval. My parents got carried away and insisted that it's him they want, not my ex anymore. Out of fustration and pressure I married this new guy but I feel no love for him. My ex also wants me back and I want same because I love him.

I plan to divorce my husband because I can't stand that he Will be my husband for life. I don't love him.

Please advise me."

This is serious....I think you should discuss with your ex if he still agrees to go on in taking you back as his wife cuz you have been rejected by his family,so plan well

lalasticlala:
A Nairalander who seriously needs advice sent in this mail. Please read and advise her. Thanks


"I Am still in love with my ex but I am married to a stranger


I wish to seek advice from nairalanders. I will accept insults. I just got married 2 months ago.

Let me start by saying I dated my ex for 4 years. We loved ourselves but you know as the year went by, my ex started showing some attitudes like hiding his phone when sleeping. Also his parents came up that we can't marry, simply becauss I am not same state with him.

While all this played out, this friend of mine connected me to a guy whom came back from abroad to marry. I saw the guy but didn't like him but before we met. I already informed my parents about this guy from abroad who likes me a lot. Without seeking for my approval. My parents got carried away and insisted that it's him they want, not my ex anymore. Out of fustration and pressure I married this new guy but I feel no love for him. My ex also wants me back and I want same because I love him.

I plan to divorce my husband because I can't stand that he Will be my husband for life. I don't love him.

Please advise me."

sorry, my fuckery is exhausted..., try cook up a better nollywood story next time.

You are just wicked. Go back to ur ex n live to regret it for d rest of ur life. You think he cares? Sorry!!!


Its not as if ur hubby doesn't care for u or he is a wife beater or something. You just want for Bleep d innocent guy up. Did he force you to say "yes I will marry u" when he asked "will u marry me?"

Oh! U decided to sheepishly follow ur parent selfish interest n because u want to answer madam yanki.
If u know what is good for u, u better start loving ur hubby. Stop communicating with ur ex n make ur marriage work for good

lalasticlala:
A Nairalander who seriously needs advice sent in this mail. Please read and advise her. Thanks


"I Am still in love with my ex but I am married to a stranger


I wish to seek advice from nairalanders. I will accept insults. I just got married 2 months ago.

Let me start by saying I dated my ex for 4 years. We loved ourselves but you know as the year went by, my ex started showing some attitudes like hiding his phone when sleeping. Also his parents came up that we can't marry, simply becauss I am not same state with him.

While all this played out, this friend of mine connected me to a guy whom came back from abroad to marry. I saw the guy but didn't like him but before we met. I already informed my parents about this guy from abroad who likes me a lot. Without seeking for my approval. My parents got carried away and insisted that it's him they want, not my ex anymore. Out of fustration and pressure I married this new guy but I feel no love for him. My ex also wants me back and I want same because I love him.

I plan to divorce my husband because I can't stand that he Will be my husband for life. I don't love him.

Please advise me."

Put ur Pinshure fess, So we can access how serious u are.

Rizzoli:
Please one question, what did the husband do wrong to her What is his offense??

no offense pls. She is just wicked

solhenawo:



Please send your account number to me .
You are a very wise individual.....keep it up.

3025664166...Skye

Thanks ...appreciation

I usually don't advice people, but I will advice you.

While in the University, my elder brother arranged a girl for me because I had not been dating and showed no interest in dating. My brother asked me to secure admission for the girl in my school due to the competitive nature of admission in my school. I secured admission for her and she landed in my house. I helped her to find accommodation, but she kept rejecting it. My brother then said I should stop looking for accommodation because she's going to be my wife. She fell in love with me but I have no any trace of feeling for her. We lived in the same room for two years before I graduated. We were using a very small bed: so, every time she turned, she landed in my arms, and I still had no feelings for her. Sensing that I wouldn't reciprocate the love, she grew hatred for me.

Why I Couldn't Love Her

She's not a type of person that accepts correction. Everything she does is always right. She fought our neighbors at the slightest opportunity. I'm a type that don't respond to provocation. So, I had been bottling up a lot of hurts from her and my payback is not to date her. She has a fine face, but short, and I don't want a short wife. She used to boast of her beauty, and I hate it, especially when I know she's not my perfect specs. I have dated many girls since then who are not as pretty as she is, and I had strong feelings for them, but surprisingly, I never had feelings for her. By the virtue of my birth, Aquarius, I can only love from the head. That's if my partner celebrates illogical things, she won't have me.

I may still be suited for her, but she would have to grow up, mature enough to be able to cope with my reasoning. I told someone that if the girl is not married to me, they should forget about her getting married or stay married for up to two years. I had my reasons: her character, which is natural, is the most repulsive I have ever seen. Analyze your husband. If you think there is no way he can change, or there is no way you will fall for him, strive to be financially independent and divorce him. As for your ex, don't ever go back to him. It's just a smokescreen. I had an ex I failed to move on from for two years because of excess love I had for her. When she recently did her worse to me, I forgot about her within minutes, and keep sending her curses daily. No trace of love I have for her again. So, don't think you can't move on from your ex.

Be financially independent, and brace yourself up for happiness that may come late in life. I'm 37 and not married. My only problem is that people mount pressure on me to get married. I have no regrets as long as I can afford 3 square meals per day.

Why will you get married to a man you don't even love?No time self to dey blame.....A marriage with both parties deeply in love with each other will stand the test of time..Many people get marry for fame,money,beauty and so on forgetting to look deep down and search their heart very well.
My Simple Advice apologise to your new husband the reasons you can't continue with the marriage any longer because one day you might aggressively break something on his head and murder him in cold blood due to hatred..It might just occur to you he has a mouth odour or body odour, you might even have some kids and later feel he trap you....I can relate with how hatred can cause so many problems in the home.
If a woman doesn't love a man genuinely, the home will no loñger be peaceful and will eventually leads to divorce or separation...

Think about your kids?,Will you love to raise them in a loveless or broken home...As for your Ex,soon he will get irritated and dumped you.

My Dear,
Don't settle for less,this is marriage and not courtship,find time to know what you yourself actually want in a man for marriage..marriage is a two party institution and its better you marry someone with like minded,and most especially someone you both have the same measures of love because of some unforseen challenges that might come during your marital journey..[sup][/sup]

Exactly what am saying
..its better late than to be sorry...I hope you find your heartbeat soon bros,love again and raise a happy family.

RickRansom:
I usually don't advice people, but I will advice you.

While in the University, my elder brother arranged a girl for me because I had not been dating and showed no interest in dating. My brother asked me to secure admission for the girl in my school due to the competitive nature of admission in my school. I secured admission for her and she landed in my house. I helped her to find accommodation, but she kept rejecting it. My brother then said I should stop looking for accommodation because she's going to be my wife. She fell in love with me but I have no any trace of feeling for her. We lived in the same room for two years before I graduated. We were using a very small bed: so, every time she turned, she landed in my arms, and I still had no feelings for her. Sensing that I wouldn't reciprocate the love, she grew hatred for me.

Why I Couldn't Love Her

She's not a type of person that accepts correction. Everything she does is always right. She fought our neighbors at the slightest opportunity. I'm a type that don't respond to provocation. So, I had been bottling up a lot of hurts from her and my payback is not to date her. She has a fine face, but short, and I don't want a short wife. She used to boast of her beauty, and I hate it, especially when I know she's not my perfect specs. I have dated many girls since then who are not as pretty as she is, and I had strong feelings for them, but surprisingly, I never had feelings for her. By the virtue of my birth, Aquarius, I can only love from the head. That's if my partner celebrates illogical things, she won't have me.

I may still be suited for her, but she would have to grow up, mature enough to be able to cope with my reasoning. I told someone that if the girl is not married to me, they should forget about her getting married or stay married for up to two years. I had my reasons: her character, which is natural, is the most repulsive I have ever seen. Analyze your husband. If you think there is no way he can change, or there is no way you will fall for him, strive to be financially independent and divorce him. As for your ex, don't ever go back to him. It's just a smokescreen. I had an ex I failed to move on from for two years because of excess love I had for her. When she recently did her worse to me, I forgot about her within minutes, and keep sending her curses daily. No trace of love I have for her again. So, don't think you can't move on from your ex.

Be financially independent, and brace yourself up for happiness that may come late in life. I'm 37 and not married. My only problem is that people mount pressure on me to get married. I have no regrets as long as I can afford 3 square meals per day.

lalasticlala:
A Nairalander who seriously needs advice sent in this mail. Please read and advise her. Thanks


"I Am still in love with my ex but I am married to a stranger


I wish to seek advice from nairalanders. I will accept insults. I just got married 2 months ago.

Let me start by saying I dated my ex for 4 years. We loved ourselves but you know as the year went by, my ex started showing some attitudes like hiding his phone when sleeping. Also his parents came up that we can't marry, simply becauss I am not same state with him.

While all this played out, this friend of mine connected me to a guy whom came back from abroad to marry. I saw the guy but didn't like him but before we met. I already informed my parents about this guy from abroad who likes me a lot. Without seeking for my approval. My parents got carried away and insisted that it's him they want, not my ex anymore. Out of fustration and pressure I married this new guy but I feel no love for him. My ex also wants me back and I want same because I love him.

I plan to divorce my husband because I can't stand that he Will be my husband for life. I don't love him.

Please advise me."

Your ex-boyfriend does not love you else he would have married you against all odds. Family may initially be resistant, but they would finally come around.

Your ex-boyfriend is suffering from “Lose Aversion”. It’s a psychological behaviour that affects many individual. We tend to feel more pain when we lose something, than when we gain something. So he is actually feeling the pain of losing you that he wants you back and when you make the mistake of returning, the excitement is gone and he continues in his old ways.

You are a married woman now - focus on your marriage. You should be glad you have a man that loves you and want to take care of you. Many woman are looking for such love even in the western world.

It's hard to believe your parents forced you even though they might have preferred your husband for you and maybe influenced your decision by whatever means... However, I think you're simply trying to not take responsibility for your decision to get married to your husband.

The journey is still far, so my simple advice is that you train yourself to persist in looking forward.

From Eve to the 12 year old girls of today one thing is peculiar among them all...they are so easily fascinated and excited by anything that brings them pleasure that they overlook the consequences of their decisions. She is in love with the ex and at the same time was carried away by the wealth of the stranger from no where! I am very sure what she intended to say was that she would like to keep having sex with her ex and probably allow him breed her a couple of times but she would also still like taste of the wealth of the rich dude abroad ...females reek of primitive selfishness! Imagine Eve thinking of how sweet the fruit could be and how she could become as smart as GOD all because a stranger said something contrary to what a known friend said...

First of all how did your break up with the guy? Was it messy did you do it publicly and how did you guys resolve things it matters because it sets the ground for if there is any possibility of salvaging love not everyone you share details of your relationship with its not everyone happy you find love. Only two of you can communicate and settle things but it will take maturity and humility. Abroad guy will offer you stability but are you compatible ? Find out .. I know someone who was so in love with this guy and he would always ignore her only to have a stranger tell him they both have chemistry ....

Just because love doesn't look like what your used to does not mean it won't involve into something better

Ma if ur ex been single tells you he would marry you after you leave your husband na fake word he get wetin him want abeg think am wella,maybe u still want because uhv been with him(ex) before now for 4years,give it a try to loving your husband and make him (ur husband) understand the "you" so he can be a better man. for me my married ex can only be my side chi