Hello Nairalanders,

I read a thread where a guy was complaining about ladies demanding too much from him and I understand his plight and also, I believe he is yet to face reality.

We all have the responsibility to grow and as such we don't just grow physically, we grow mentally, emotionally and spiritually (this applies to religious folks).

If you want a lady as your own, don't just rush to get anyone to satisfy your sexual urge, you have the responsibility of seaching, waiting and checking well before getting a lady that suits your taste and one that won't be a weight to your race in life.
You wouldn't expect apple to grow on a coconut tree just the same way you shouldn't expect maturity and independence from a teenage girl or some typical kind of girls.If what you want doesn't exist in their own world, you have no business with them.

It's high time y'all started to acknowledge that a Man that intends to manifest as a Man has the responsibilty of providing. If you're yet to possess the "Men's quality", kindly wait untill when you'll be, don't complain, focus on what matters, and if you see a lady that believes in your dream and if she's ready to go through the "rough times" with you, nice, but if not, don't complain.

I see slay queens everyday and I know in my mind that I have absolutely no business with them, all I can do is to preach Jesus to them if I see anyone that cares to listen.
And I see most of y'all complain about Feminism when in actual sense those qualities these feminists possess are what fits into the criterion of the type of lady you want.

The world is what it is, learn how to deal with it. Complaining only proves that you're not fit to deal with it, which may also mean that you don't intend to grow.

Let the Men be Men and Women be Women.

Modified:

If you're the only one on earth, Jesus would still have come to die for you. That's how much he loves you.

I know you may wonder why people suffer in this world if He truly loves so much, I want you to know that He's so faithful so much that He honours His Words more than His name.
God is so faithful that He will not lie or say something and do the other, all what is happening on earth are as a result of Men's short comings.

Walk in the light of His Word and you will subdue darkness (which also includes poverty, shame, fear, sickness and all) without stress.

There is a divine plan and agenda for you. Don't waste it.

Accept Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Saviour today. He's very faithful to those that delligently serve Him.

nice one

So u mean a woman who is not your wife can hip all her responsibilities on her bf especially if there’s no guarantee yet that she will marry him?

sad truth, I once walked up to a girl, we spoke for hours the first day...I knew she was a runs girl..but I decided to try my luck..the next day we met.. she came asking for 5 thousand..immediately my brain reminded me that this is not what I need...I smiled and walked away..we really have to know what we want..wen I talk to a girl for 30min ...it doesn't take m much time to understand her person.
seriously there are broke girls out there..decent ones..despite them not having they try hard to manage what they have..I have seen..

Olifiz:
So u mean a woman who is not your wife can hip all her responsibilities on her bf especially if there’s no guarantee yet that she will marry him?

You see; That's where the problem lies:

If you want a real relationship, of course Marriage should be in the plan, if not it's just flings and that is more of a contract. If you want her to be your sex mate, what will you be bringing to the table?

If the lady feels like she's bigger than what you're offering, there shouldn't be a fuss about it.
It's simple, you're the one that wants to purchase a commodity, the price on it shouldn't give you headache.
And if you say both of you will enjoy the sex thing, just remember that you were the one that asked her out, you asked for it, you should be able to deal with whatever comes with it.

JERRY1925:
sad truth, I once walked up to a girl, we spoke for hours the first day...I knew she was a runs girl..but I decided to try my luck..the next day we met.. she came asking for 5 thousand..immediately my brain reminded me that this is not what I need...I smiled and walked away..we really have to know what we want..wen I talk to a girl for 30min ...it doesn't take m much time to understand her person.
seriously there are broke girls out there..decent ones..despite them not having they try hard to manage what they have..I have seen..

It's better not to have that mind set so you won't be disappointed.

Boland:
Hello Nairalanders,

I read a thread where a guy was complaining about ladies demanding too much from him and I understand his plight and also, I believe he is yet to face reality.

We all have the responsibility to grow and as such we don't just grow physically, we grow mentally, emotionally and spiritually (this applies to religious folks).

If you want a lady as your own, don't just rush to get anyone to satisfy your sexual urge, you have the responsibility of seaching, waiting and checking well before getting a lady that suits your taste and one that won't be a weight to your race in life.
You wouldn't expect apple to grow on a coconut tree just the same way you shouldn't expect maturity and independence from a teenage girl or some typical kind of girls.If what you want doesn't exist in their own world, you have no business with them.

It's high time y'all started to acknowledge that a Man that intends to manifest as a Man has the responsibilty of providing. If you're yet to possess the "Men's quality", kindly wait untill when you'll be, don't complain, focus on what matters, and if you see a lady that believes in your dream and if she's ready to go through the "rough times" with you, nice, but if not, don't complain.

I see slay queens everyday and I know in my mind that I have absolutely no business with them, all I can do is to preach Jesus to them if I see anyone available.
And I see most of y'all complain about Feminism when in actual sense those qualities these feminists possess are what fits into the criterion of the type of lady you want.

The world is what it is, learn how to deal with it. Complaining only proves that you're not fit to deal with it, which may also mean that you don't intend to grow.

Let the Men be Men and Women be Women.

All your ancestors will be turning in their graves right now

...

Yes Brother...

Jesus Is Lord!

IamPlato:
...


Yes Brother...


Jesus Is Lord!

Coming from a guy? Nigeria will be good some day. Allow the kids to keep whinning.

pepemendy:
nice one

Boland:
You see; That's where the problem lies:

If you want a real relationship, of course Marriage should be in the plan, if not it's just flings and that is more of a contract. If you want her to be your sex mate, what will you be bringing to the table?

If the lady feels like she's bigger than what you're offering, there shouldn't be a fuss about it.
It's simple, you're the one that wants to purchase a commodity, the price on it shouldn't give you headache.
And if you say both of you will enjoy the sex thing, just remember that you were the one that asked her out, you asked for it, you should be able to deal with whatever comes with it.

U only just making ur point clear now n that’s good. But u were not specific in ur post as to whether it’s a serious relationship or not. I get ur drift now. But bro even in a serious relationship a guy is not expected to take full responsibility of taking care of the gf except he decides too

Olifiz:



U only just making ur point clear now n that’s good. But u were not specific in ur post as to whether it’s a serious relationship or not. I get ur drift now. But bro even in a serious relationship a guy is not expected to take full responsibility of taking care of the gf except he decides too

A man should take the responsibility of providing for his woman, and of course not everything she asks for but her basic needs. If she's willing to stick to what you're offering, fine.

Most young men don't subscribe to the ideas of feminism and at the same time they want their women to be independent, be able to cater for their needs and sometimes support their men (financially). These are the qualities a true feminist possess and it will be unfair to condemn what they expect of their man (which is equality) but want the goodies they offer.

I don't subscribe to the idea of feminism and as such I don't believe that Men's responsibilities is to be shared.

Like I said earlier, let the Men be Men.

Olifiz:
So u mean a woman who is not your wife can hip all her responsibilities on her bf especially if there’s no guarantee yet that she will marry him?

If you have an issue with her hipping her issues on you, then young man, you need to embrace feminism like your deek depends on it.
It entails her providing for her own damn self.

I personally have nothing against feminism, issue is most nigerian females don't know what feminism actually means, and just feel it means eating their cake and having it. There are responsibilities that need to be embraced with it, and most naija females hate those responsibilities.

Boland:
A man should take the responsibility of providing for his woman, and of course not everything she asks for but her basic needs. If she's willing to stick to what you're offering, fine.

Most young men don't subscribe to the ideas of feminism and at the same time they want their women to be independent, be able to cater for their needs and sometimes support their men (financially). These are the qualities a true feminist possess and it will be unfair to condemn what they expect of their man (which is equality) but want the goodies they offer.

I don't subscribe to the idea of feminism and as such I don't believe that Men's responsibilities is to be shared.

Like I said earlier, let the Men be Men.

Q1) What exactly is feminism?

Q2) What happens to your marriage if you are in a rough patch and the wife becomes the breadwinner for that stretch in time? Does it shatter?

Q3) What if she is a doctor or some passionate profession and cannot stay home like a "good little wife"?

I ask these questions because its easy to beat ones chest ahead of time, but there are certain things that happen along the course of life that if both have not already squared certain things out with each other and set the right foundations, that marriage will smash. This is the 21st century and the demands on a family have changed...especially if you guys have plans to live in other places besides naija.

Boland:
A man should take the responsibility of providing for his woman, and of course not everything she asks for but her basic needs. If she's willing to stick to what you're offering, fine.

Most young men don't subscribe to the ideas of feminism and at the same time they want their women to be independent, be able to cater for their needs and sometimes support their men (financially). These are the qualities a true feminist possess and it will be unfair to condemn what they expect of their man (which is equality) but want the goodies they offer.

I don't subscribe to the idea of feminism and as such I don't believe that Men's responsibilities is to be shared.

Like I said earlier, let the Men be Men.

what do you mean when you say your woman?

Your woman is your wife not a girlfriend.

And you said a man must provide (In Africa only, don't generalize) for his woman.. I ask myself which ladies?
The same ones that are dragging rights with men ?

2buffagain:


If you have an issue with her hipping her issues on you, then young man, you need to embrace feminism like your deek depends on it.
It entails her providing for her own damn self.

I personally have nothing against feminism, issue is most females don't know what it is and just feel it means eating their cake and having it. There are responsibilities that need to be embraced with it, and most females hate those responsibilities.

2buffagain:


What is feminism?

Equality. Perhaps you should tell me your own definition.

Boland:





Equality. Perhaps you should tell me your own definition.

Sorry please answer all 3 questions so I get you before responding. I posted before finishing

The dumbest set of males are the ones who believe ladies are doing them a favor by having sex with them. Girls beg real guys for sex that's something you might never know sha.

2buffagain:


If you have an issue with her hipping her issues on you, then young man, you need to embrace feminism like your deek depends on it.
It entails her providing for her own damn self.

I personally have nothing against feminism, issue is most nigerian females don't know what feminism actually means, and just feel it means eating their cake and having it. There are responsibilities that need to be embraced with it, and most naija females hate those responsibilities.

I’m not sure u understand my quote o. I was asking OP is all he is saying is that a guy should take all responsibility of a girl he’s not sure of marrying?

Just a lil reply to ur post tho.
I don’t n will never support all these fake naija feminists, it’s just selfishness that’s making them think feminism is a struggle they should stand with without have a basic knowledge of what feminism is. Smh for them.

Boland:
A man should take the responsibility of providing for his woman, and of course not everything she asks for but her basic needs. If she's willing to stick to what you're offering, fine.

Most young men don't subscribe to the ideas of feminism and at the same time they want their women to be independent, be able to cater for their needs and sometimes support their men (financially). These are the qualities a true feminist possess and it will be unfair to condemn what they expect of their man (which is equality) but want the goodies they offer.

I don't subscribe to the idea of feminism and as such I don't believe that Men's responsibilities is to be shared.

Like I said earlier, let the Men be Men.

We are still sayin the same thing bro. But as u have said I’ll stand on this fact that a man can take most responsibilities if only she’s willing to stick to what the man is offering. So we good.

Olifiz:


We are still sayin the same thing bro. But as u have said I’ll stand on this fact that a man can take most responsibilities if only she’s willing to stick to what the man is offering. So we good.

Yeah, we good, bro.

lilbest4:
The dumbest set of males are the ones who believe ladies are doing them a favor by having sex with them. Girls beg real guys for sex that's something you might never know sha.

You don't understand.

You are the one going after her, not the other way around. If she comes to meet you, that's another ball game. You purchase a commodity, you pay the amount on the "price tag", no questions asked.

Who are the real guys you are talking about? You mean guys without self control that just hit anything under skirt?
Hey fam, we ain't talking about boys here.
If you know where you're going, you will fight anything that may hinder you.

2buffagain:


Q1) What exactly is feminism?

Q2) What happens to your marriage if you are in a rough patch and the wife becomes the breadwinner for that stretch in time? Does it shatter?

Q3) What if she is a doctor or some passionate profession and cannot stay home like a "good little wife"?

I ask these questions because its easy to beat ones chest ahead of time, but there are certain things that happen along the course of life that if both have not already squared certain things out with each other and set the right foundations, that marriage will smash. This is the 21st century and the demands on a family have changed...especially if you guys have plans to live in other places besides naija.

1) Feminism: The fight for equal right of living for females.

My view: Females enjoy what the males don't and as such it's fair for male to enjoy what females don't.
Now: If the females want to enjoy what the males are enjoying while still holding on to their own priviledge, there is sure to be a problem.
That's just the summary (in layman's words)of my own opinion.

2) If the man is experiencing a financial downturn, the wife being the present breadwinner should help out, we've been told marriage is "for better for worse", but I'm sure you and I know that the relationship will most likely be out of balance because they are both occupying the wrong position.

This is what I'm saying:
Men shouldn't nag about a woman's demand if she's not yet your woman, if you think her standard is higher than your own pocket, let it go.
It will only be unfair if you've gotten her and later because of a bad situation she decides to leave, that'll be disloyalty on her part.

3) That depends on the husband, you know what you're going for, you should be prepared to deal with the cons of it. Besides, a woman with such profession can still be a good " wife".

See: There is a definition for a Husband as there is for a Wife.
I often ask my female folks this question;

Do you wanna be a Wife, just a Woman or a Man for your husband?

For a ship to sail, there must be a captain. If leaders aren't necessary, men in uniform wouldn't need commanders. I'm sure you knwo what I'm trying to say here.
Equality is bullshit in marriage.

Boland:
You don't understand.

You are the one going after her, not the other way around. If she comes to meet you, that's another ball game. You purchase a commodity, you pay the amount on the "price tag", no questions asked.

Who are the real guys you are talking about? You mean guys without self control that just hit anything under skirt?
Hey fam, we ain't talking about boys here.
If you know where you're going, you will fight anything that may hinder you.

well, I don't know you. Maybe you are short, ugly, uninteresting and have mouth odour thats why girls don't take interest in you.

When you elevate yourself, spend the money you would have spent on a girl on yourself, develop yourself mentally, you would not have to go after them. only a little smile and they will be looking for ways to give you their number, call them twice, they are already planning a visit. Would you still call this going after her?

Boland:
You don't understand.

You are the one going after her, not the other way around. If she comes to meet you, that's another ball game. You purchase a commodity, you pay the amount on the "price tag", no questions asked.

Who are the real guys you are talking about? You mean guys without self control that just hit anything under skirt?
Hey fam, we ain't talking about boys here.
If you know where you're going, you will fight anything that may hinder you.

you're the one who doesnt get him. while you act like a man other guys, assholes, are destroying that pvssy.
you're just a Nice Guy vagina worshipper with zero game. continue using money to get what others get for free.

ubunja:
you're the one who doesnt get him. while you act like a man other guys, assholes, are destroying that pvssy.
you're just a Nice Guy vagina worshipper with zero game. continue using money to get what others get for free.

My thread is not for you.

lilbest4:
well, I don't know you. Maybe you are short, ugly, uninteresting and have mouth odour thats why girls don't take interest in you.

When you elevate yourself, spend the money you would have spent on a girl on yourself, develop yourself mentally, you would not have to go after them. only a little smile and they will be looking for ways to give you their number, call them twice, they are already planning a visit. Would you still call this going after her?

Talking of looks, I'm sure I wouldn't score less than a"B" if we're to rate me.

You see:

What some guys study, chase and are desperate about, some guys run away from it.
You're what you think about.

Well, I don't expect you to understand.

Boland:
My thread is not for you.

and who am i exactly?

ubunja:
and who am i exactly?

I perceive you're yet to understand what I've been saying.
You need to get off that box first before anything.

Here is a hint:
True happiness is not derived from pleasures you get from a vag1na.There are things more important.

All I've been trying to say is to in a way correct the mentality of young men in here about females.
Their constant complaints about the females being gold diggers, sl*ts and all was stirred by frustration that was caused through their ignorance.

I'm not trying to impress anyone. Trust me.

Boland:
I perceive you're yet to understand what I've been saying.
You need to get off that box first before anything.

Here is a hint:
True happiness is not derived from pleasures you get from a vag1na.There are things more important.

All I've been trying to say is to in a way correct the mentality of young men in here about females.
Their constant complaints about the females being gold diggers, sl*ts and all was stirred by frustration that was caused through their ignorance.

I'm not trying to impress anyone. Trust me.

sex is the greatest gift from God to Man thats why a man and a wife leave their families to live together for it. women were, are and always will be golddiggers. thats what you must know. thats why no girl dates a guy without a job.
guys are frustrated becos girls demand too much for access to sex. dont just laugh the guys' complaints as if it means nothing. its a legitimate reasonable complaint.