jessca048:
all what she has listed is good, but she should have one thing at the back of her mind men are unpredictable she shouldn't be surprise when that same nigga leaves her for a Chic that can barely even measure of to her

looool, because she has it going perfect for herself doesn't mean she should look over her shoulder. I dunno why y'all think everyone is like everyone else. Same women that say all men are scum can't even stand or trust themselves

openmine:

whether boyfriend or husband....its still doesn't change any thing....won't the husband divorce a wife or do you think a child or ring will make a man stay with a lady.....?

A good man in a relationship will be a good man in marriage....same is applicable to a good woman!

It starts from the relationship.... That's where you know who you are into....

U can't give what you don't have!

And besides,she is not doing it because of marriage...she is doing it because she loves her man!

A lady in love can do any thing for her partner....same for a guy!
There is no place for half love or careful love....

There is place for threading with caution and acting in wisdom and discretion.

A lot of boyfriends end up being exes. I guess she has the heart for whatever she gets.

The fact that unmarried people have sex in relationships doesn't still make it right.

ImaIma1:


There is place for threading with caution and acting in wisdom and discretion.

A lot of boyfriends end up being exes. I guess she has the heart for whatever she gets.

The fact that unmarried people have sex in relationships doesn't still make it right.

True but there is no caution when it comes to love....
That's why its important to take some time to empty ur self from the past relationships due to its effects in one's future decisions....

As for boyfriends becoming exes,do you stop travelling to a particular place simply because you heard that there was an accident?

life or whatever you do in life is a risk.....If you are too careful in matters of the heart,the right person could be mistaken for a wrong person......

There is no such thing as too much love....if you want to love some one,do it wholeheartedly but if you don't want to because you want to be too careful,the let that partner go.....

As for having sex before marriage,that's a decision between partners......

Don't worry, ur eyes go soon open!!! But until then,




Good luck!!

Slimsly100:
Don't worry, ur eyes go soon open!!! But until then,




Good luck!!

She is having great time with a great man......wish her well....no need for the negative banter.....not every relationship will turn out wrong......

openmine:

She is having great time with a great man......wish her well....no need for the negative banter.....not every relationship will turn out wrong......

I never said it will turn out wrong ma guy and I bet you weren't patient enough to see that I wished her goodluck. Anyway, there no best means of communication than face to face that way u can get the true meaning and motive of someone's statements.

Slimsly100:





I never said it will turn out wrong ma guy and I bet you weren't patient enough to see that I wished her goodluck. Anyway, there no best means of communication than face to face that way u can get the true meaning and motive of someone's statements.

Yeah I saw the good luck but just say so without making it look as though she is going to be slaughtered!

Remember no two relationships are the same.....what work for one may not work for the other!

Let's be optimistic!

victorian:






I spelt it correctly cause am good with spellings and names to an extent.

Am not like you, that can't spell correctly, whether you type intentionally or non intentionally? That's your problem.

You are not even smart lol

Like I said, dont dabble unto what you have no idea of.

You are just fooling yourself, so keep guessing. And talking as if you are right.

You no near.

You reported my post to be removed Yet una go dey form thick skin


Calm down and learn from your elders, una nogo gree, na to dey form nonsense....Smh

IamD18:


You reported my post to be removed Yet una go dey form thick skin


Calm down and learn from your elders, una nogo gree, na to dey form nonsense....Smh

I was the one that reported it.

I have tried to be civil with you by reporting any nonsense that oozes out of you.

jessca048:
all what she has listed is good, but she should have one thing at the back of her mind men are unpredictable she shouldn't be surprise when that same nigga leaves her for a Chic that can barely even measure of to her

If you can do all dat, with the way I've known you, I'll definitely put a ring on ur finger

And datx hw e wil dump u for a girl dat kant even boil water


dere ix no manual on how to keep a man

Jaqenhghar:

Hello
I sent you a reply and didnt hear from you after. Im great. A lot has happened we will talk through the usual channels. Missed U too.... see ya

Hmmm...sounds juicy

Ok, let me go check.

Difficulty in getting a complete lady like her is why many young men are still single. People like her are rare.

openmine:

True but there is no caution when it comes to love....
That's why its important to take some time to empty ur self from the past relationships due to its effects in one's future decisions....

As for boyfriends becoming exes,do you stop travelling to a particular place simply because you heard that there was an accident?

life or whatever you do in life is a risk.....If you are too careful in matters of the heart,the right person could be mistaken for a wrong person......

There is no such thing as too much love....if you want to love some one,do it wholeheartedly but if you don't want to because you want to be too careful,the let that partner go.....

As for having sex before marriage,that's a decision between partners......

I agree with you that love should be full and not half.

But a girlfriend should not assume the duties of a wife neither should a boyfriend assume duties of a husband.

Somethings are better done in the walls of marriage even if they end in divorce.

ImaIma1:


I agree with you that love should be full and not half.

But a girlfriend should not assume the duties of a wife neither should a boyfriend assume duties of a husband.

Somethings are better done in the walls of marriage even if they end in divorce.

Still don't really get the difference.....or your emphasis towards marriage as a yardstick for commitment and love!

I love some one and deep inside am willing to care and help her out in every way possible even though I haven't married her yet which is also a possibility,then some one will tell me to wait until I get married before I do such....?

So what will I be doing with her before marriage?
keep looking at her face everyday like a stranger until we get married?

So because am not yet married to her yet,I should not assist her or buy her gifts or show her love until I marry her?

So because a guy hasn't proposed to a lady yet,she won't cook for him or do what she would want to do for a guy that she loves simply because she is not sure if he may marry her or dump her.....?

It doesn't make any sense.....these ideologies are illogic and can't stand the test of time!

if a person can be dumped in a so called "wall of marriage",then what's so special about the marriage euphoria.....?
I really don't get it....

If a lady is genuinely into a guy,she won't even wait until she gets married to him before offering him love,respect and care!
It comes naturally....

openmine:

Yeah I saw the good luck but just say so without making it look as though she is going to be slaughtered!

Remember no two relationships are the same.....what work for one may not work for the other!

Let's be optimistic!

Huh!!!!
Not this early morning biko. I nor get strength to argue or quarrel today.
I agree with u las las.

Slimsly100:





Huh!!!!
Not this early morning biko. I nor get strength to argue or quarrel today.
I agree with u las las.

Na you sabi

openmine:

Still don't really get the difference.....or your emphasis towards marriage as a yardstick for commitment and love!

I love some one and deep inside am willing to care and help her out in every way possible even though I haven't married her yet which is also a possibility,then some one will tell me to wait until I get married before I do such....?

So what will I be doing with her before marriage?
keep looking at her face everyday like a stranger until we get married?

So because am not yet married to her yet,I should not assist her or buy her gifts or show her love until I marry her?

So because a guy hasn't proposed to a lady yet,she won't cook for him or do what she would want to do for a guy that she loves simply because she is not sure if he may marry her or dump her.....?

It doesn't make any sense.....these ideologies are illogic and can't stand the test of time!

if a person can be dumped in a so called "wall of marriage",then what's so special about the marriage euphoria.....?
I really don't get it....

If a lady is genuinely into a guy,she won't even wait until she gets married to him before offering him love,respect and care!
It comes naturally....

Before sex became a norm in relationships and many things that have become "ok" were not, what were people doing with each other?

If i go by your logic, it means she shouldn't hold back from having children for him since she should give her all.

My friend already has two children from 2 different relationship and the second relationship that produce the second child does not seem to be very active anymore.

I guess she uses this model of give your allas long as you love him

ImaIma1:


Before sex became a norm in relationships and many things that have become "ok" were not, what were people doing with each other?

Please stop making emphasis on sex as if that's the most important reason why people go into a relationship.....Maybe that's what you think but that's not my idea!
There are great things partners enjoy aside sex....they care and loved each other....
They respect each other....which is paramount and an indicator of where the relationship should lead to...
Today a lady will say she can't respect a guy until he puts a ring in her finger....Or she can't do anything for him since she doesn't know if he will marry her or dump her....does that narrative make sense to you?

ImaIma1:

If i go by your logic, it means she shouldn't hold back from having children for him since she should give her all.

That should be a decision between the man and the woman esp if they decide not to get married...that's because bringing children into the world is a very important responsibility but beyond the scope of this issue we are talking about!

however,I have seen partners that have loved and stayed together with kids without getting married and i have seen married couples that have kids but have divorced....so what difference does it make?

In other words,marriage does not secure a couple from divorce neither does a marriage ensure commitment or fidelity!

ImaIma1:

My friend already has two children from 2 different relationship and the second relationship that produce the second child does not seem to be very active anymore.

That was her decision.....she may not want to fancy marriage!
based on the fact that she had children from different relationships....aka baby mama
however,the same thing is applicable in marriage.....
A lady can marry a guy,give birth to kids and still get divorced....which makes her a single mother with kids....and again still marry and still divorce.....
So what makes the divorced lady different from the single lady who has children from two relationships....

Look am not saying marriage is not prerequisite esp before God,but using marriage as a way to ensure commitment is not true and can't stand the test of time!
Marriage is not a mechanism that automatically produces love!

ImaIma1:

I guess she uses this model of give your allas long as you love him

lol...
I guess U misunderstood my give ur all principles(loving genuinely) which is independent of child bearing.....
When you love some one,you will care for the person....motivate the person...love genuinely.... because that's what you want to do for the one you love....
That's what I mean by giving your all in a relationship....

once that happens,marriage will only become a necessary formality where you want everyone to know that you have been married to the one you love genuinely.....

Remember you can't practise love in marriage..... if you were not in love with him before marriage,don't think the spirit of love will take over as soon as you get married!

@ ImaIma1....I have a question for you.....
Did God place a condition to men before lovingly offering his son to die for us knowing fully well that some men will take that gesture for granted?

openmine:


Please stop making emphasis on sex as if that's the most important reason why people go into a relationship.....Maybe that's what you think but that's not my idea!
There are great things partners enjoy aside sex....they care and loved each other....
They respect each other....which is paramount and an indicator of where the relationship should lead to...
Today a lady will say she can't respect a guy until he puts a ring in her finger....Or she can't do anything for him since she doesn't know if he will marry her or dump her....does that narrative make sense to you?



That should be a decision between the man and the woman esp if they decide not to get married...that's because bringing children into the world is a very important responsibility but beyond the scope of this issue we are talking about!

however,I have seen partners that have loved and stayed together with kids without getting married and i have seen married couples that have kids but have divorced....so what difference does it make?

In other words,marriage does not secure a couple from divorce neither does a marriage ensure commitment or fidelity!




That was her decision.....she may not want to fancy marriage!
based on the fact that she had children from different relationships....aka baby mama
however,the same thing is applicable in marriage.....
A lady can marry a guy,give birth to kids and still get divorced....which makes her a single mother with kids....and again still marry and still divorce.....
So what makes the divorced lady different from the single lady who has children from two relationships....

Look am not saying marriage is not prerequisite esp before God,but using marriage as a way to ensure commitment is not true and can't stand the test of time!
Marriage is not a mechanism that automatically produces love!


lol...
I guess U misunderstood my give ur all principles(loving genuinely) which is independent of child bearing.....
When you love some one,you will care for the person....motivate the person...love genuinely.... because that's what you want to do for the one you love....
That's what I mean by giving your all in a relationship....

once that happens,marriage will only become a necessary formality where you want everyone to know that you have been married to the one you love genuinely.....

Remember you can't practise love in marriage..... if you were not in love with him before marriage,don't think the spirit of love will take over as soon as you get married!

Somethings should be reserved for marriage.

If they can decide to live as a married couple when they are single, having children shouldn't be left out.

All this you keep emphasizing is not something you will advise your sister that is dear to you to engage in.

Even if you do not see marriage as anything important, somethings are better done there. Even if she has kids and they break up, she was married.

Would you marry a lady that has had 3 kids for 3 different men all in the name of total love in relationship?

You might try to answer in the affirmative but deep down you would rather not.

Your opinions might be as a result of civilization and supposed new age, but some values never change.

I won't advise anyone i know to be in a relationship and act as a wife.

ImaIma1:


Somethings should be reserved for marriage.

If they can decide to live as a married couple when they are single, having children shouldn't be left out.

Aside child bearing, what are the OTHER things that should be reserved for marriage?

openmine:
@ ImaIma1....I have a question for you.....
Did God place a condition to men before lovingly offering his son to die for us knowing fully well that some men will take that gesture for granted?

No.

So you think God will accept you sleeping with your girlfriend because he sent His son to die for us unconditionally?

Or what is your point?

IamD18:


You reported my post to be removed Yet una go dey form thick skin


Calm down and learn from your elders, una nogo gree, na to dey form nonsense....Smh

I didn't report you.

It seems the mods realised you've been ranting and wailing without facts.

Let your conscience judge you.

openmine:



Aside child bearing, what are the OTHER things that should be reserved for marriage?

Let us drop this unending argument. We cannot agree because we share different views.

You believe a dating couple should be completely exclusive and i believe otherwise.

I would never advise anyone close to me to give her all in all to a boyfriend. A wise person will thread with caution and not fall like hupmty dumpty.

highqueen:

I was the one that reported it.

I have tried to be civil with you by reporting any nonsense that oozes out of you.

God bless you dear.

ImaIma1:


All this you keep emphasizing is not something you will advise your sister that is dear to you to engage in.

I will tell my sister to love genuinely without holding anything back in a relationship because relationship is very important to the success of any marriage and if they both love each,then they can get married.....
I cant advise my sister to start managing her love for her partner simply because she is not sure if he will leave her or dump her?....that doesn't make sense unless she doesnt love him...
And besides,no matter my advise,its still going to be her decision not mine!

ImaIma1:


Even if you do not see marriage as anything important, somethings are better done there. Even if she has kids and they break up, she was married.

Marriage is as important as a relationship!
You cant in one breath condemn one while upholding the other!
Marriage is important but you expect marriage to do every thing that you didnt do before marriage which a relationship offers!
We expect way too much from marriage!
You expect marriage to make you and you partner become comitted...thats a big lie!
You expect marriage to solve all your financial,mental and spritual problems....thats another terrible misconception!

We ignorantly see marriage as an equipment that converts a person's personality....that's also a pathetic conclusion!

If marriage could do all these,why is there infidelity.?
....why are couples still unhappy.?
why do we have an astonishing increase in divorce cases?
why hasn't marriage changed a known cassanova or a lady who is a serial cheat?

ImaIma1:


Would you marry a lady that has had 3 kids for 3 different men all in the name of total love in relationship?

You might try to answer in the affirmative but deep down you would rather not.

You really don't get my drift do you?
if a man loves a woman and vis a versa,they will do things the right way by getting married but they still have to go through a relationship which is equally important to understand and communicate with each other...which is the norm!
But marriage in its context didn't make them fall in love or made them do things for each other....marriage didn't give them maturity or responsibility.... all these were done and planned before they married not afterwards!

ImaIma1:


Your opinions might be as a result of civilization and supposed new age, but some values never change.

That's also your opinion which you are entitled to....
But if your opinion has brought more harm than good to a married couple,I think it should be time to review your values!
Besides,relationship is a principle that has existed long before both of us we even born hence,you cant just erroneously say that relationship came as a result of a "new age".....

ImaIma1:


I won't advise anyone i know to be in a relationship and act as a wife.

Whats really the requirements to be a wife that you cant do naturally for some one?
Do you need a Wifey title on your name to love and do something worthwhile?

But you will advise a guy to act like a hubby by assisting the lady since he genuinely loves her right?...okay!
My advise is that if you don't love the guy or he doesn't love you,then get some one else whom you love and who is ready to make you a life partner....
Relationship is another phase of commitment, if you get it wrong in a relationship, you will definitely get it wrong in marriage

ImaIma1:


No.

So you think God will accept you sleeping with your girlfriend because he sent His son to die for us unconditionally?

Or what is your point?

My point is simple you want to withhold some of you love with a condition that your partner can only enjoy it only when he slips a ring on your finger....

Now my anology is simple....did God give a criteria for sending his son to die for us?

openmine:

Still don't really get the difference.....or your emphasis towards marriage as a yardstick for commitment and love!

I love some one and deep inside am willing to care and help her out in every way possible even though I haven't married her yet which is also a possibility,then some one will tell me to wait until I get married before I do such....?

So what will I be doing with her before marriage?
keep looking at her face everyday like a stranger until we get married?

So because am not yet married to her yet,I should not assist her or buy her gifts or show her love until I marry her?

So because a guy hasn't proposed to a lady yet,she won't cook for him or do what she would want to do for a guy that she loves simply because she is not sure if he may marry her or dump her.....?

It doesn't make any sense.....these ideologies are illogic and can't stand the test of time!

if a person can be dumped in a so called "wall of marriage",then what's so special about the marriage euphoria.....?
I really don't get it....

If a lady is genuinely into a guy,she won't even wait until she gets married to him before offering him love,respect and care!
It comes naturally....

Nicely thought....

The only problem sensible ladies are having with relationship is being too conscious of heartbreaks,, forgetting that your excess consciousness of it is eventually going to make the dude lose interest someday after seeing someone better.

ImaIma1:


Let us drop this unending argument. We cannot agree because we share different views.

You believe a dating couple should be completely exclusive and i believe otherwise.

I would never advise anyone close to me to give her all in all to a boyfriend. A wise person will thread with caution and not fall like hupmty dumpty.

Dear how do you explain "Threading with caution?" An example please

ImaIma1:


Let us drop this unending argument. We cannot agree because we share different views.

You believe a dating couple should be completely exclusive and i believe otherwise.

I would never advise anyone close to me to give her all in all to a boyfriend. A wise person will thread with caution and not fall like hupmty dumpty.

Views and opinions are debated to evaluate its credibility and authenticity...
Just because you feel you may not get a job after an interview test doesn't mean you shouldn't give your ALL by studying, committing and ensuring that you pass it....
Everything is a risk!
You don't commit half way to a project or responsibility.... you give your all so that,even if it didn't turn out well,you will know you did your best!

The lady is giving her all in the relationship not because she depends on the guy or marriage for her happiness but because she believes in true love and true love will give her true happiness!
That's what I meant.....

austyn0:
Nicely thought....

The only problem sensible ladies are having with relationship is being too conscious of heartbreaks,, forgetting that your excess consciousness of it is eventually going to make the dude lose interest someday after seeing someone better.

Exactly....and where has the over consciousness taken them to?
Am not saying people should not be cautious but if you have decided to be in a relationship with some one you love,decide to give your best to ensure it works out....

I haven't seen any one that commits to a great project and leaves it half way unless the person never believed in the project ab initio

When people start to prioritize what may get bad in the relationship over how the relationship can get stronger and better, separation becomes inevitable!