mutter:

While women are striving towards equality most men are still searching for the good old fashioned qualities in a wife, like respect, submission, faithfulness etc.

Nija4Life:

Marriage is not a lifestyle choice (at least in African tradition) as some may think

Nija4Life:

but an institution which requires traditional and spiritual commitments to flourish.

Missy B:

I'll pretend I understand what You actually mean.

Missy B:

Can You explain what ''traditional and spiritual commitments'' means, please?

mutter:


I think it is a terrible mistake most women make to wait for an already made man or to have very unrealistic standards.
Also many of these women get carried away with career and are not able to reconcile that with marriage.
I see many women with ideas of equality but unfortunately it does not work out that way in real life.
Getting married is no easy task
While women are striving towards equality most men are still searching for the good old fashioned qualities in a wife, like respect, submission, faithfulness etc.
I personally have the greatest respect, not for married women or single parents but for single parents. Raising a child alone and doing it well, is real hard job.

mutter:

many women that don´t get married on time are still looking for mr.right.
Only Mr. right in most case changes his name to mr.manage.
I think it is a terrible mistake most women make to wait for an already made man or to have very unrealistic standards.
Also many of these women get carried away with career and are not able to reconcile that with marriage.
I see many women even in this forum with ideas of equality but unfortunately it does not work out that way in real life.
Getting married is no easy task and because marriage is taken so seriously in Nigeria most men are not willing to rush into a marriage that they think they might regret.
While women are striving towards equality most men are still searching for the good old fashioned qualities in a wife, like respect, submission, faithfulness etc.
And yes a married woman has more respect.
I personally have the greatest respect, not for married women or single parents but for single parents. Raising a child alone and doing it well, is real hard job.

well said, points raised are so to the point, Its also intresting to note women are settling for the " hell do for nowman" or "hell do" man

zenatta:

@ POSTER
Me, I am cool and having a lotta fun. I have seen people destroyed nay the word is deformed because of the compulsion to marry. In desperation they make huge mistakes. Mistakes that last a life time but phew! are they glad they got rid of the bugger.

Marriage will happen if you want it to. You have got to put in a lot of effort especially if you are female. I hate that I just said that but its true. Sometimes you have to quit being yourself if you want it bad. As for me I don't, though the loneliness does hit hard sometimes. I do believe that if I would I will. So no sweat. Besides there is cable, the Internet, the occasional phone call in my cell, food, money and the Bible. Being a single parent is a huge bonus.

I do totally agree with these points. Men want the works, faithfulness et al. They want to be the focus and in charge and lets face it there is nothing like equality between the sexes. Modern women dream on! As for Mr. Right , y'all better settle for the bird in hand and make him right.

Couldnt of said it better myself

gem70:

i guess one just has to make the hard choice, career or marriage? few would be lucky to get both

Inked_Nerd:

Must a woman get married and have children? If they are content with their life like that then that is up to them.

Inked_Nerd:

Must a woman get married and have children? If they are content with their life like that then that is up to them.

zenatta:

a mon avis, make sure you are one of that ''few' cos it is really ,

lonely without children and a man. I tell myself who needs those men, truth is I have had enough, but sometimes the Internet is what it really is, faceless and cold and the books I love love love reading will end one day abi, and my daughter will one day go off to perform her own life and the Bible? does disown my lifestyle, ''it is not good that woman should be alone'', ''a three fold cord , , ''it is better that two walk together '' and on and on

But truth, I am taking all I can take selfishly now, cos when a broda eventually invades my life _{(ok, a better less hostile word)}, occupies my life its going to be all about him, ''have you darned my socks'', ''where is my food'', ''come and clean my poo'', and on and on. I can still wait abeg

Shinatu:

No, It is not a must, but the society(If you live in Nigeria) will make sure that you are not content with your life, they will make it a living hell for you, the humiliation will kill you, even in the Church.

This is what is making many men who are not fit for marriage to have wives in their houses, the women would rather marry them like that than to end up single.

I remember when people used to say a girl's happiest day is her wedding day, but look around you these days , you will see many brides who are finding it difficult to even smile for the camera, they will tell you it's the wedding stress.

If they are lucky, the kids come quickly and make the marriage bearable,or end up finding out the man is not that bad afterall.

Believe me, it is still a man's world

Survivor9:

Many girls who come online are still kids. Miss Independence, Miss Westernized is just a front. Most of them will worship a man if they're lucky to have one.

OUCHHHHHHH

I remember when people used to say a girl's happiest day is her wedding day, but look around you these days , you will see many brides who are finding it difficult to even smile for the camera, they will tell you it's the wedding stress

Gamine:

It would be a bit difficult even if she is 100% happy,
because we are yet to mature in this world and break out
of the 'keeping up with the Alakijas' mould.

Even women in their 20s are having a hard time,
Those in their 30s are on 'Sale' and 'Clearance' mode,

Survivor9: Many girls who come online are still kids. Miss Independence, Miss Westernized is just a front. Most of them will worship a man if they're lucky to have one.

@zennata,
U're lucky , at least u have a kid. Many modern day women will die childless because of their unrealistic expectations about relationships. Hard as it sounds, it's still a man's world. Many have learned too late.

Olauk:

I'm 38 never been married but have children. And it infuriates me when people say@its ok for you as you have children," children are a blessing but can also prevent some men from wanting a relationship with you.

Gamine:
Even women in their 20s are having a hard time,
Those in their 30s are on 'Sale' and 'Clearance' mode,